Bed wetting 8year old

[Princesspeach1980]

Can anyone help with any amazing advice re bed wetting? DS is 8 and still in pull ups at bed time which are soaked every morning. He is a very very deep sleeper and says he does not wake up in the night so no opportunity to go to the loo. When we try without pull ups, he wakes in the morning cold and wet, but it does not wake him in the night.

I know he needs to drink more during the day and I'm really pushing this now, but it's difficult as its out of my control when he's at school, and counter productive to get him to drink lots in the evening. Yesterday he made a big effort to drink at school and wet himself in the afternoon because he's not used to it.

I'm thinking we need to see the GP about this but when we last tried about 18 months ago, we were completely fobbed off.

I guess I need to try without pull ups again too, but the mountains of washing drive me insane, especially as he sleeps on his back so even the duvet is usually wet and it barely fits in the washer. I usually manage a couple of weeks and then go back to pull ups as it gets us nowhere.

DH has suggested we have consequences eg getting him to help sort the wet sheets, but I don't want to introduce anything negative as he has no control over this.

Can anyone suggest any top tips, even just to help with the practical side of dealing with the wet beds?

[Twitterqueen]

There are special bed-wetting clinics around that you can go to. I would go back to your GP or nurse and ask for details

Please tell your DH not impose consequences in any way, shape or form. The children cannot help it. They do not want to wet the bed - it something over which they have no control. It is a physical thing - not mental.

My youngest was dry from 2 years old. It took the eldest until she was 13. It's not a choice

[Avebury]

A waterproof duvet and pillow is a worthwhile investment. They can just be wiped down with anti bac in the mornings.

[Princesspeach1980]

How did I not know waterproof duvets existed! Genius, am ordering one right now

DH understands completely now about consequences, he hadnt thought it through I think. I have introduced a sticker chart for drinking more though as that is in his control.

I should probably make an appointment with the doctor in the holidays, I'm reluctant to start meds etc but I don't know why if I'm honest

[Wolfiefan]

It may not be meds though. Someone I know solved the issue with an alarm thing. It wakes them the moment they start to wet.
If he wets in the day if he drinks a lot I would want physical issues ruled out.

[MegBusset]

YY to GP - ask for a referral to their eneuresis clinic. Have you spoken to the school nurse about it?

YY to waterproof bedding - I would not personally want a waterproof duvet/pillow as they would get sweaty but we use a waterproof mattress protector for DS1 who is 9 and still has the odd accident.

YY to 'they are all different' - DS1 hardly had any daytime accidents since he trained at 3yo but still wets some nights. DS1 has been 100% dry at night since 2.6yo but at nearly 7 he still fails to get to the loo quickly enough some days!

I do get whoever has an accident to help with the cleaning up (nothing too arduous or yucky, just lending a helping hand eg fetching washing basket) - I don't see this as negative as by this age they should be helping with household chores as a matter of course. I certainly don't tell them off, just "Never mind, go and fetch the basket and give me a hand getting dry sheets on for you" kind of thing.

[Captainladder]

My son is 7 and still wets the bed. Would second the advice about consequences, it's not their fault. I do get ds to help
Me change the sheets sometimes but it's an ask for help and not a consequence if you see what I mean! The nurse at the doctors told me the best thing was increase liquids in the day, it is hard at school. In my sons school they all have to bring in a bottle for water that is kept in their class rooms. I have asked the teacher to try and encourage him to drink, and I also drew a line halfway down so that's his target to drink to.... We do see a difference between days he drinks more in the day and when he doesn't. It's a bit like training your bladder. Nurse said it could take up to 3 months and if it didn't improve we could bring him in for urine sample and he can be seen in the enuresis clinic.
Someone once told me no dark liquids (eg blackcurrant etc) in the evening?

The mountain of sheets is a pain but it will pass eventually! I'd defiantly try and speak with the school about water intake though.

Hope that's a little helpful!

[deepdarkwood]

I have a just 12 year old who is just turning the corner on bedwetting. I'd go back to the GP (was he 7 when you went? Over 8 is when they start treating iirc) and restate the issue/impact - ask for a paed consult and (more helpful ime) a referral to the enuresis clinic. They will give you lots of helpful hints and tips (e.g. measuring daytime urine output to check if drinking enough) but also can lend out things like alarms which are really helpful, really quickly for lots of children (didn't help ours, but you can't win them all)
However, only GP/doc can give you desmopressin - which surprises urine output so for lots of kids is an immediate 'off' switch.

We double layer sheets (so bed mat-sheet-bed mat-sheet) so that we could peel off the top layer and wash easily and quickly. We also used old cot sheets as top layer (so smaller/less washing). Ds also used pull-ups a lot of the time to minimise washing.

I don't think consequences will be in any way helpful at this stage - after all, it's something he's doing in his sleep - i.e. he has no control. I do like ds to help me with sorting his bed, but never in a punitive way. And luckily, ds has always been very matter of fact about it, and because of that, he's always been happy to go on sleepovers/camps/school trips - I was always more nervous than him! I would be worried that making it out to be his fault/a Bad Thing might make him more conscious if for whatever reason it isn't easily/quickly stopped.

[Lindy2]

Have you tried a bed wetting alarm? We had great success with one.
DD was 7 and a very heavy sleeper too.
I know it doesn't work for everyone but I would really recommended trying an alarm before medication.
I got ours on ebay.

[deepdarkwood]

The meds are honestly very helpful - even if just as a back-up. Ds would tend to have a spell of being on them - then take a break and see if things were better/try more self-help stuff harder - then go back on. Now, we have them as an emergency tool - for when he goes on Scout camp etc and is really keep not to have to deal with a wet sleeping bag every morning!

And yy to no dark liquids/fizzy drinks or caffeine/tea. We also incentivised water drinking at school when he was younger (1 whole bottle = 15 mins computer time, iirc!

[Princesspeach1980]

I think the daytime wetting was a one off, he had drink way more than usual and asked to go to the toilet but teacher asked him to wait a few minutes. He's painfully shy so was scared to say he couldn't wait and wet himself. Poor boy was very embarrassed but teacher knows the circumstances now and has said she will always let him go straight away if he asks.

The clinic sounds good, I've heard about the alarms but never heard any feedback as to whether they work so good to know some people have had some success. I think he was 7 last time, we saw a locum who went on about waking him for a wee in the night, then gave me a leaflet saying not to do that. Left feeling quite confused