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How to cheer up a sad 28 month old following arrival of new sibling - and how to get her napping again!

10 replies

dependentspouse · 27/05/2015 15:05

DD1 (28 months) has taken the arrival of DD2 (3 weeks old) much harder than I expected Sad. She has always thrived on routine, slept well, and been generally happy and cheerful, but is now a bit of a mess, frankly.

She has suddenly stopped napping and is demented with tiredness by bedtime (she did 1.5 - 2 hours every single day up to the new arrival, and is definitely not ready to drop the nap), has started waking in the middle of the night looking for mummy (daddy will not do), and has become generally a cranky, morose little thing with lots of negative language creeping in e.g. 'I can't' 'Leave me alone' 'I don't want to' etc, all of which are brand new phrases for a previously confident, cheerful child. Oh, and she has started biting in nursery Shock.

Thankfully she loves her sister and is very affectionate with her.

Any advice on how can I help her? I know that with lots of love and attention it will improve with time, but things are so difficult for everyone at the moment - thanks in advance!

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Igottastartthinkingbee · 27/05/2015 15:09

All I can say is that it will pass. She's had a massive life change plus being a toddler is a minefield of developmental change so no wonder she's struggling. We were there a few months ago DS (2.5yrs) with new baby sister. It gets better and worse again and then better again! And so on and so forth!!

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marmaladegranny · 27/05/2015 15:15

Can you nap with her for a few days?

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dependentspouse · 27/05/2015 15:20

Marmalade - not really, she is still in a cot. I agree though that if she started napping again she would be generally in better form overall.

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Roseybee10 · 27/05/2015 19:44

Mine struggled for a few weeks but now is fine (she's 2 years 9 months now and dd2 is almost 4 months). She has however dropped her nap now argh. She's really cranky by bedtime but it became such a battle to get her to nap and then if she did she wouldn't go to sleep til 10 so it just became not worth it tbh.
Now she goes to bed at 7.15 instead of 8pm and we get a bit of time in the evening. (I'm demented during the day though with no break lol).
It will pass, but it's so hard. I soent the first 6 weeks crying as I felt is ruined dd1's life x

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paxtecum · 27/05/2015 19:47

Would she get in your bed with you for a story and a nap?
Could she be a 'big girl' and have a bed instead of a cot?

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Toootiirreed · 27/05/2015 19:56

Baby her and extra hugs kisses and WOW comments - praise and heaps of love reassures us all at times of uncertainty.

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squidgyapple · 27/05/2015 20:17

Had this with DD1 at the age of 2 - also after arrival of new baby. We had to take DD1 out for a drive early afternoon to get her to sleep so she wasn't a complete nightmare all afternoon /evening. She never went back to having a proper nap though and my youngest dropped the nap even earlier at about 20months iirc...

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dependentspouse · 27/05/2015 20:18

Thanks for the replies all, yes I do worry that DD1 will be scarred for life by this transition (but know that they will be best buddies in a couple of years)!

A bed might help with her feeling like a big girl - good suggestion. We have been holding off to minimise changes but actually might have been a little too conservative, she is probably ready.

She was actually in okay form this evening up to a slightly earlier bedtime, so it might just be her time to drop the nap - a bit of a shock to my system though! There go my lunchtime naps Sad

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Roseybee10 · 27/05/2015 22:09

I had dd1 still in the cot. When dd2 was 2 weeks old she appeared in the living room at 6am when I wa up for a feed having climbed out her cot! Just a wee heads up lol. Fright of my life I got. She's great in a big bed now though x

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Igottastartthinkingbee · 27/05/2015 23:22

A positive to dropping the nap is that it frees up your day no end! I was dreading the dropped nap but it is pretty good not having to factor it into your day. And there'll be plenty of days where the nap still happens for a good while yet. Yy I second the heaps of praise thing, even over the smallest things. And get her involved looking after the baby.

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