My 3 year old started talking at a very young age (found a letter from a paediatrician stating he was able to put 5-6 words together in a sentence that was in context 
he was 18 months old at the time)
I don't know how relevant that is but just wanted to set the scene for the level of speech I'm talking about!
So, over the past few weeks, my DS has been coming out with some very disturbing things and I just don't know where it's coming from, or how to deal with it. A few examples......
2 weeks ago we were watching 'Pip Ahoy' and the seagull was being a bit naughty, flying around. My DS says 'I'm going to rip his wings off so he can't fly'
He frequently says 'I don't like X, he's rubbish so I'm going to put him in the bin'
Yesterday he said he was going to 'push me backwards then kick' me as I wouldn't put his shoes back on he'd taken them off in the car and I couldn't reach to put them back on he also said, earlier in the day, that he was going to 'smash nana up' because we were having a race to the toilet but she got there first.
He's currently watching Blaze whilst I tidy the front room and he just shouted 'You do that again I'm going to punch you really hard' to Crusha, the obligatory naughty character. WTF?
He most certainly doesn't hear it from me or OH (I grew up in a violent home so am very mindful of what comes out in front of him, plus neither of us have violent tendencies). I was speaking to OH about it last night and he's convinced he's getting it from nursery. He was moved up with the 4/5 year olds just prior to his 3rd birthday as he was getting very frustrated in the toddler room because his communication level is so advanced so maybe he's hearing it from them during play?
I'm starting to convince myself that he's going to be a feature on the crime and investigation network in 20 years as a killer that could have been avoided because the warning signs were there from a young age!!!!
How can I deal with this??
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Parenting
3 year old DS saying disturbing things
namechangeafternamechange · 23/03/2015 08:49
Crikey maybe I've overreacted in that case. is talking about punching and pushing really normal language for a three year old? I am dreading DD getting older 
Yes DS came out with this stuff at 3. He hadn't seen anything on TV it was half imagination and half nursery, I reckon.
The other day (he is 6 now) he said he was going to do a wee on someone. We get lovely shades of violence too, things get "bitten up" quite regularly. We do tell him they are not nice things to say but it doesn't make a difference. He did impress a friend of DH's though by using the word "annihilated" correctly. 
The one which I have a bugbear about is "If you do that again you're going to get...(anything)" - just because I loathe it as a threat parents make to children. I know that's really judgy of me though
It's much more common among 4-5 year olds, and isn't anything to do with being neglected and seeing inappropriate stuff. Remember even in fairly "typical" families with 2-3 children 2-3 years apart, a large majority of 4-5 year olds will have 7-8 year old and 9-10 year old siblings, who will almost certainly come across media marketed at their age range which talk about killing or shooting. And whether they access it themselves or have friends, still in that typical age spacing, with siblings aged 12-13 or 15-16 accessing games like Call of Duty etc, those kinds of things are common. Of course it filters down. Either the younger ones hear the older ones using it, think it's cool, and emulate it, or they see stuff which they end up imitating. But it's not in most cases neglect, just happenstance. 3-4 is the beginning of that striving to be cool IME.
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I would question whether moving him up to the 4/5 year olds room when he was only 2 was a good idea just because his communication is good. His oral skills sound good but nothing the nursery shouldn't have seen before quite regularly. A 2, nearly 3 year old has very different needs and social abilities compared to a group of 4/5 year olds. I understand that above average oral communication gives the impression of them being able to cope more easily or 'need' interaction with older children but actually, what they need socially is often quite different. Sometimes what can happen is that a too young child is presented with language and ideas beyond their rationalisation. As problems go, it's not huge and he's in with those older children now and it's just a little factor in his development but what you're experiencing as a consequence is that while he's been developing socially, he's been doing it in an environment where the language and ideas presented to him are beyond his rationalisation.
My DS is 3 and when frustrated or tired and unable to logically express his feelings towards something, he will just declare "I will throw you and Christmas and all Santa's reindeer in the bin and glue the lid shut" (Christmas Eve 2014, I thank you 
). It's normal and these are the worst things they can think of. They're saying they're SO SO cross that they will PUT YOU IN A BIN. In a way it's lovely that it's the most terrible thing they can envisage. Try and hear it as "I am very cross and wish to express this" because that's what they're saying really.
You stand in any nursery/reception playground and you hear all sorts of seemingly violent threats used through play. Often aped from television or films or nursery rhymes or fairy tales. Thanks to Peter Pan, yesterday DS threatened to feed his sister to a crocodile and fling her into another land. He's only a psychopath in the same way that all 3 year olds are.
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