Coping with meltdown in carseat?

[SleepyMcgee]

I've just driven back from town with my DD being hysterical in her car seat. I had to pull over once as I was worried about her. Gave her lots of cuddles, got a burp out...thought, right let's get home. No she had other ideas and typically the bloody traffic was bad therefore prolonging the agony on my ears and my poor baby's throat
How do people cope with these stressful times? She's in her bouncer chair now, absolutely fine so I just don't know what the problem was

[BustyCraphopper]

Both my children detested the car as babies / toddlers. I found taking dd1 out made things worse as it just prolonged the journey (with detours to find safe places to park) and made her scream more after I put her back.

I just tried not to drive anywhere unless I could help it, missed out on loads as a result but I just couldn't bear the crying. Also used to sing nursery rhymes very loudly continuously so she could hear I was there. Changing to the next stage seat helped as well

[SleepyMcgee]

Thanks for your reply. Argh it's hard, I know pulling over prolongs the journey but I fret and think 'what if she's in agony with burps I couldn't get up earlier'. Good idea about singing, I usually shush her but then I get frustrated as it doesn't calm her down. I absolutely know what you mean about only using the car when necessary, it makes me sad. Fingers crossed the next car seat helps

[Quitelikely]

Try getting a cd with whale music or something soothing it might work.

I don't think stopping is a good idea as the torment begins again for her

[WhyOWhyWouldYou]

DS has reflux and so hated the car seat as a baby. I tried all sorts, the only thing that helped was one of these:

www.homebargains.co.uk/products/6445-chicco-fun-travel-safari-car-toy.aspx

Ignore the age range on it, it has a lullaby mode and attaches to the headrest in your car, so baby cant touch it. The lullaby stays on for around 20-25mins a time.

Later on they can use a soft remote to make it light up and the lion roar and the car brum, etc.

[SleepyMcgee]

Thanks, yes I've got white noise on my phone so I could try that as well.
I know what you mean about the torment beginning again for her. She screams like she's hurt it's horrible at least it won't last forever

[Littlef00t]

How old is she? I presume you have a mirror so you can see each other.

[SleepyMcgee]

Thanks WhyOWhy. It was sold out unfortunately but I'll have a look into something similar

[WhyOWhyWouldYou]

Sorry meant to say it was sold out there, i just couldnt remember what it was called, so was quickly googling "chicco safari" and that was the first link that actually had the right thing.

Amazon and I think tesco? used to sell them too.

[SleepyMcgee]

Ah thank you so much. Anything to reduce the stress!

[SleepyMcgee]

Littlef00t she's 19 weeks old. Not ideal but she's in the front (airbags off). She was even worse when in the back

[Littlef00t]

You might want to look at other car seats. The first one we had was v upright and dd hated it, but relaxed enough to sleep when we bought a new one that was more reclined.

[LuckyCharms]

This is where a dummy comes in handy

[SleepyMcgee]

Thanks Littlef00t we're toying with the idea of getting a new carseat. Did you get the same age group, eg you had a 0 stage seat and bought another 0 stage seat?
LuckyCharms I wish, the little monkey won't have one. I've tried 4 different kinds. Just tried again with a dummy tonight after today's palava but she was having none of it!

[pasbeaucoupdegendarme]

Has she always been like this? I ask because my dd went through a phase long one of hating being in the car in the dark.... Not a lot you can do about it though if you have to get from a to b!

[SleepyMcgee]

pasbeaucoupdegendarme Yes pretty much
I'm baffled as to what the problem is, I can carry her round a shop in it fine. Really considering biting the bullet and buying a new carseat

[Minithemoocher]

We got a combination car seat. It changed my life!

[SleepyMcgee]

Mini is a combination seat one which you can remove from the car with a (hopefully) sleeping bambino in it?

[Minithemoocher]

No it stays in the car, which is the only downside. We got the Joie one.
Consequently dd has got very good at staying asleep as I transfer her. It did take some practice though!
It was totally worth it as I was starting to avoid going out as I couldn't bear the screaming. We tried sitting dd in a few in the shop and this is the one that she looked the most comfortable in. We drove her home in it and for the first time ever she didn't scream. It was amazing! Now she regularly falls asleep in it, or just babbles away to herself.

[SleepyMcgee]

Wow that's great Mini
That's the only downside to getting the next size up, sometimes my DD will fall asleep in the car. She's such a bad sleeper/napper anyway. She fell asleep in her pram the other day, just as I'd gotten back to the car. I couldn't believe it, she was not happy at being woken up to go into to her car seat!

[Iggly]

Is the newborn support thing still in there (the sponge under their bottoms?) As they get bigger it needs to come out as sort of folds them in half across the tummy

[SleepyMcgee]

Iggly no we took it out a while ago

[josephine1986]

My dd hates the car, always has. I think because she can't see what's going on and gets bored. Plus they don't look very comfortable. The things that have helped us-

• safari toy thing with mirrors and pull toys. This is really useful!! We got it around 5-6 mths and still going strong at nearly a year
  
• my dh sitting in back with her, entertaining. Obviously not always possible
  
• downloaded album of nursery rhymes which I play loudly and sing along to!!
  
• time. Sorry. Up to about 5 months all journeys were hell so I limited as much as pos because I worried about my concentration. Since, she has improved as we can bribe her with snacks, and she knows she won't be in there long. Has also figured out the mirror so can see me.
  

Def try a toy and nursery rhymes.
A friend of mine had two crashes ( not serious) due to screaming child. I would say it's not worth the risk of you are concerned . It's hard enough when sleep deprived.

I only drive when really necessary and short distances . Easier to get the bus or train where dd is entertained by other people!

[SleepyMcgee]

Thanks Josephine. I've just got back from going out to see my friend. I put a nursery rhyme cd on loud and sung with it and also put some toys in a better position on the carseat for her. Things started out really well but then turned into crying both on the way there and back! Grrr, I don't know. It helps knowing I'm not alone in this situation and I can completely understand people crashing the car as it's such a distraction

[Littlef00t]

Fairly random, but just wondering how she gets to sleep usually for naps and nighttime? A friend of mine found her dd really improved once she was self settling rather than being fed to sleep.

I think she was stressing out because she could feel herself dropping off and wasn't used to it.

[SleepyMcgee]

She's EBF and we're co-sleeping. I feed her to sleep for all naps and she sleeps with my boob in her mouth most of the night, which is exhausting for me.
I feel in such a pickle with the situation, I don't know how to get her to self settle as she goes bananas if I leave her and I don't want to let her cry herself to sleep. How did you friend get her DD to self soothe?