What are your non-sporty 13 yo boys going to do all summer?

[Frontier]

DS just isn't into sport and neither are his friends. He has lots of friends, up to now they've tended to meet up at each others houses on "play-date" type arrangements and play video games all flipin' day, although of course they don't call it that

Now though they want to go out and "hang". I hate the thought of them loitering on street corners or making a nuisance of themselves at the playground but I'm at a loss for what else to suggest. They can do cinema/bowling/swimming etc but the cost adds up very quickly. That said, the cost of hanging out seems quite high - they always seem to have cash for fast food etc.

So, I have a few issues. I don't want him to be a yoof who has nothing better to do than hang round the streets, I don't have bottomless pockets and I don't really want what I do have to be spent on junk food. I'd rather they were outside than on the X-box all day though.

He will be going to a couple of nature club type things and there's an outdoor activity that he goes to with Dh that will fill a couple of days but what "should" he be doing with his friends? What am I missing?

[Frontier]

No-one?

[KingscoteStaff]

Sorry - it's wall to wall sport with DS and friends here. Golf, swimming and cricket so far today...

[Takver]

I don't have a 13 y/o boy (12 y/o dd here), but I can tell you that lots of the 13 year old boys in our village do just 'hang out', generally on scooters / bikes, quite often I see them in the woods climbing trees when I'm out walking the dog (in an ironic cool 13 y/o way, not a little boy way of course ).

Personally I don't see the problem, I wish dd's friends lived in the village so she could just hang out with them! I wouldn't supply cash for junk food though, would supply food that he could take (in fact saw neighbour a few doors up calling her ds back & giving him food to put in his rucksack as he was heading out). They're all healthy and skinny, much better than being indoors all the time on the computer . . .

[Heyho111]

Hanging about in groups is actually better than going to organised clubs.
Clubs have their place but believe it or not are not as good as having freedom. Scouts are good because the kids organise what they want to do.
When hanging out they are learning intricate social development, learning to entertain themselves, develop imaginary and problem solving skills , they learn to be independant and mature.
My son hung out at skate parks - explored by the canal climbing trees etc it kept him fit and occupied. He never got into bother. He

[Frontier]

I know you're right Heyho, he's a good boy and has nice friends but this is all new to me.

Yesterday DH dropped him at a friend's house, they walked the dog, went "down the High Street" and got some lunch at Wimpy, spent the afternoon at the park (read nature reserve) and then he walked the 4 miles home with his MP3 player for company. Ok I could have done without the Wimpy but once in a while it's Ok I suppose and apart from that a pretty good day, I think.

Today he's going to a RSPB reserve with a picnic and his Grandparents and he hasn't complained once, despite the fact that he had to turn down an invite to the fair with another friend because he'd already got plans. That made me proud

[Takver]

Sounds like a great day to me. Maybe he also needs to look out for some jobs so that he has a bit of cash to spend? I often get asked by 13-14 y/os if I've got any jobs they can do (generally I suppose they'd be thinking of lawnmowing and the like), also pet feeding / plant watering etc for people on holiday could help fund a bit of junk food here and there. Personally I think at that age if they're active and eat healthily generally it isn't going to do them any harm.