is it normal for 18mth to favour one parent over another?

[milkyman]

I know im silly but my dh is on hols this week and 18mth ds adores him! He pushes me away and hits me! He never usually shows much affection towards me like he does dh! Is this normal?

[purplemurple1]

I think its normal for kids to favour the parent they see less of, as its more exciting to spend time with them playing etc and not just doing the normal every day 'boring' stuff. (I'm assuming over the 18months he has seen alot more of you day to day.)
Also I think they go through phases, mines only 8 months but he always prefers the parent that has been at work more that week (we are both part time sahp/wohp).

[mummyxtwo]

My dd2 is 18mo and until a few months ago was all about Mummy and super clingy. Then suddenly she only wanted Daddy - this was at weekends, as she doesn't see him during the week because he gets home after her bedtime. I was starting to feel quite rejected and annoyed given that I do the majority of her care - had to keep reminding myself she was only a baby and not to take it personally! Now it has calmed a little - she still wants a lot more Daddy cuddles at weekends and favours him, but is still affectionate with me. I agree that they presumably get more clingy with the parent they see less of - nice for that parent, so they don't feel too out of it, but a little irritating for the other!

[missmodular2]

Definitely normal. Both of my dds (now 5 and 7) have gone through phases of preferring daddy - especially during the toddler years. I was gutted at first but I've realised over the years that they love me just as much. Try not to worry about it - it will pass!

[milkyman]

Thanks all! Feel childish for thinking like this but feel so hurt as I do so much with him.

[BertieBotts]

Yes definitely normal, try not to take it personally! It usually goes in stages so he'll just want you, then DH, then you again. Stages can last weeks, months or years. But he adores both of you, really he does :)

[gamerchick]

It's normal.. they like to swap.

Plus you're safe to be a tinker with.. mummy is always there regardless

[itsjustthursday]

It's happened to me, but the other way around! DH is a SAHP, DS is now 16mo and over the last few weeks has suddenly started to prefer me a lot more. He will push DH away, won't go to him when he's called... last night DH called him to the bedroom to get ready for bed, DH left the living room with DS following, once DH was out of the living room DS closed the door and came to be with me on the sofa! Fortunately he hasn't been hitting DH, but he is showing a great preference towards me where he didn't before and wants to sit on or beside me everywhere. It's lovely for me, but also took me quite by surprise!

DH sometimes pouts and says DS doesn't love him anymore, but really we know it's just a phase. Did your DS prefer you before and ever turn away from your DH? As there were some moments when DS preferred DH over me when he was smaller, but I just sort of went with it as I knew it wasn't a deliberate snub, so perhaps your DH has experienced similar. Basically what I am trying to say, you may both have been favoured and both not favoured at some point, it seems to be a natural part of the parenting experience and it will pass

[neversleepagain]

I am pressuming it is normal or DTD2 only loves her father

We have twin girls, one is obsessed with her father. She cries if I put her to bed, if she wakes in the night only he can settle her back to sleep and occasionally she will head butt the cot if I go in in the mornings and not her father

DTD1 is more a mummy's girls at least someone loves me