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Parenting

how often do your children see their grandparents

49 replies

marriedwithkids · 27/02/2014 10:05

I was wondering how often your children see their grandparents. my parents live 3 1/2 hours away so my children hardley see their granparents but my oh parents live 5 min drive away and they never really just pop round to see them. when I was pregnant my mil was all happy about having grandchildren but now they are here she doesnt really see them apart from when I have to drop them off at their house for when I go to work.

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ShatnersBassoon · 27/02/2014 10:07

A handful of times a year.

Is your MIL looking after them when you're at work? Doesn't that count as seeing them?

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Mrswellyboot · 27/02/2014 10:07

Both live half an hours drive. I see my own parents twice a week and dh once a fortnight. Sometimes dh brings baby on his own too.

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CMOTDibbler · 27/02/2014 10:10

Can be as long a gap as 6 months, but usually every 2-3 months.

But if you drop them at MILs when you are at work your children are seeing them then?

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Pagwatch · 27/02/2014 10:11

We see my mum once a month. She's about 2 hours away

The DC have seen my PIL once in 11 years and they live about 15 mins away.
Not interested in children really. They are trying to see ds1 now he is an adult and are non plussed that he isn't interested.
Odd people. Teachers...

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Chopsypie · 27/02/2014 10:14

A couple of times a week. My mum looks after them two days a week and MIL usually comes down over the weekend. They FaceTime pretty much everyday as well.

It can be quite wearing as we see lots of them, but I had an amazingly close relationship with my nana and wouldn't want my kids to miss out on one with theirs.

Both sets do a lot for us and I've got a lot of time for them.

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iseenodust · 27/02/2014 10:15

DS is 9 and sees my parents about once every three weeks but no fixed pattern. They sometimes offer to have him overnight so we can go out. They live 15 mins drive away.

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marriedwithkids · 27/02/2014 10:15

its only really for ten mins she looks after them untill my oh picks them up. I meant that she wouldn't offer to come around on say a weekend or when im on annual leave so she doesnt have to watch them for the timeslot of work.
so its not unusual for the grandparents not to see their grandchildren if they just live 5 mins away..

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ShatnersBassoon · 27/02/2014 10:17

Why not come to a regular arrangement if that's what you want, say you'd like them to come for Saturday tea every week?

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marriedwithkids · 27/02/2014 10:18

Its just the fact when they didnt have to watch them as they were previously in nursery they never saw the kids even though they were 5 mins drive away. and when you do ask them to watch the kids its such a big deal. I dont understand the fact of been excited when pregnant to not see them if they dont need too

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Pointeshoes · 27/02/2014 10:20

Lots , 3 times a week and once a week for the other grandparents.

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ouryve · 27/02/2014 10:21

MIL is about 10 minutes away and we see her every couple of weeks. FIL rarely shows his face.

My family are 100 miles away and we see them every couple of months - sometimes DS1 goes to stay for a couple of nights on his own.

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ThomasLynn · 27/02/2014 10:22

I saw mine maybe twice a year. DD sees my mum every Sunday, my dad when he's in the country and XP's dad and stepmum every Friday and his mum every second Saturday.

If you want to see them regularly, have you said so? They might be trying to stay out of the way and not "interfere."

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2blessed · 27/02/2014 10:24

Each set fortnightly at least. Both mine and dp's mums live quite close.

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2blessed · 27/02/2014 10:25

My dm has ds weekly.

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WowserBowser · 27/02/2014 10:27

PIL have Ds once a week. DF sees him once or twice a week.

Both live about 20 mins away.

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LadyFlumpalot · 27/02/2014 10:28

They see my mum every week on a Friday as she doesn't work Fridays and we live just a few minutes apart so we spend a few hours together. They see my stepdad once every couple of weeks (he's at work when I see my mum).

My dad and stepmum live an hour away and have busy lives so we see them maybe once a month or so.

My PIL live two hours away and we see them maybe every two months.

There is no preference to how often we see people - just as often as life dictates really.

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whatsagoodusername · 27/02/2014 10:28

MIL: every 2-3 weeks, lives an hour train ride away.

FIL: about every 6 months. Also 1 hour train ride.

DM: lives a 9 hour flight away. She comes 1-2 times a year for 1-2 weeks at a time, we go 1-2 times a year for 2 weeks.

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marriedwithkids · 27/02/2014 10:29

We've asked them to have the kids over night but they refused.

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LadyFlumpalot · 27/02/2014 10:32

I haven't seen my maternal grandparents for 9 years and probably won't see them again in this lifetime as they live overseas and are too frail to travel to England and claim to be too frail for me to visit them, even with me staying in a hotel so as not to cause extra work.

My paternal grandparents live 300 miles and a 6 hour drive away and are not overly fussed about seeing me - I try to visit when I can.

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winklewoman · 27/02/2014 10:33

We live about half a mile from DS and the same from his XP . Fortunately all is amicable, and long may it reman so; they have been separated for about five years. The small kids come to us on Mondays and Fridays after school so that we can supervise DGS's homework, to help his mum avoid battles over it. Parents have them on alternative weekends, though each of them is very flexible so in practice it is unusual for them not to be with their dad during part of every weekend. DS and his GF, plus her two year old daughter, usually come with the DGCs for a family lunch on 'his' weekends. We also take kids and DS on holiday at least once a year. Our eldest grandson is just 21 and has moved into his own flat near his dad and us. We see less of him as obviously he has his own GF and social life, but I do love it when we are all together.

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TheScience · 27/02/2014 10:35

One set are about an hour away and we probably see them once or twice a month.

Other set are 3 hours away and we probably see them once every 3 months.

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hootloop · 27/02/2014 10:39

My parents we see at least 3 times a week. (Live round the corner)
My in laws minimum of once a week but often more.(live about 5 minutes drive away)
My Grandad probably once a month. (Lives about 15 minutes drive away)

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Eletheomel · 27/02/2014 10:44

Each set of grandparents generally sees them once a month (we stay over night with my folks 70 mins drive) but his folks are only 30 mins away so its just an afternoon visit).

In an ideal world I'd see my parents more and his parents less, but this is the compromise we came up with :-D

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hootloop · 27/02/2014 10:44

Also on top of that if DH and I need to go somewhere we just ring my parents and they will have the children. We don't do this very often only really to buy presents or something that won't fit in the car with the back seats up.
My mum will also pick them up from school or take one of them to school if the other us ill, at a few minutes notice, I am very lucky but often don't realise as my Grandparents onboth sides were the same.

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PublicEnemyNumeroUno · 27/02/2014 10:44

My mum lives in the same town as us and sees my kids pretty much every day.

MIL lives 10 miles away and has never made any effort to see our kids, but likes to pretend to her friends that she's fucking grandma of the year.

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