DS was born on Tuesday after an incredibly quick labour - I didn't even have time to really register that I was about to have a baby before he was here. He was born at 38+5 and I would have been 39 weeks today. I feel sort of sad that the excitement of the baby being about to arrive is now over, even though I absolutely hated being pregnant.
I am completely in love with him and can't believe how perfect he is. Last night though it was really difficult to get him to settle and I just remember thinking 'I want to go back to being pregnant and I want my old life back'. The second I looked at DS though I felt insanely guilty for ever thinking that.
Then today I've been feeling really sad whenever I think about him growing up and I just want him to stay being my tiny baby forever. I keep thinking about that magical moment we met him for the first time and I get upset thinking that that moment has gone 'forever'. I know I sound pathetic! And now I'm panicking like mad about whether he's feeding enough, sleeping enough, is breathing too fast. I'm too scared to go to sleep in case he stops breathing.
I feel like I've gone crazy. Part of me is terrified and wants my old life back and the other part of me can't believe how much I love him and that he's finally here at last. I feel like crying everytime I look at him. Is this normal or am I actually going crazy?
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Is it normal for me to feel this way when you have a newborn?
26 replies
Slh122 · 23/01/2014 21:50
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