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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

Getting rid of dummy

42 replies

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 19:49

Hi, We want to get son off his dummy soon. It might be a bit early yet (6 months), but can anyone help with advise please??? How early is good? What to do when he is inconsolable or over tired????

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helsi · 13/06/2006 19:51

not sure if 6 months too soon as my dd1 never had a summy an dd2 is only 5 weeks old and doe shave one, however, my friends have all just started getting rid of their children and they are 3+

sugarfree · 13/06/2006 19:55

Archiemummy,you have two choices,take it away now when he's too young to argue and after a couple of days won't ever remember having it.(You have to put up with the crying)
Or,wait til he's about two and you can reason with him.

AngelaD · 13/06/2006 20:04

GET RID NOw at 2 they scream the place down.

pinkranger · 13/06/2006 20:07

My son was 3.1 y when we got rid of his dummy , we left it out for Father Christams with his Pies and Whisky so he could give it to one of the new babies in the world.
When my son got up on christmas day he was chuffed that his dummy was gone, only ever asked for it twice , no crying as i tihnk he was old enough to understand.

pinkranger · 13/06/2006 20:07

also add that from 2 till 3 he only had it at night time.

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:08

This is what I've heard. I'm just not looking forward to a lot of crying. I suppose a dummy is better for the moment but in the long run a dummy is not the solution.... I just hope i won'tcuddle him so much he will see me as a pacifier!!??

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intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:14

Got rid of DS's dummy at 6 months. He was fine within 2 days. My cousin still had one at 7 years old. I was determined not to let DS go the smae way.

Going cold turkey on the dum didn't affect his sleeping either. I think best to take it away and don't make a big deal of it. If he's generally settled, then he will adapt to it fine. Could you not replace the dummy with something else? DS likes to sleep with his fave teddy.

AngelaD · 13/06/2006 20:16

No we can't have you cuddling him too much can we lol

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:19

Can we use a "blankie"?? Or is this as bad as a dummy?

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Nemo1977 · 13/06/2006 20:22

ohh archiesmummy was thinking this myself today. DD is nearly 6mths and is a dummy aholic..she constantly sucks on hers even though I try to take it away she screams for it. Ds gave his up himself at 3mths and was never as interested in it as she is. Dont know whether to go cold turkey in a couple of weeks or let her keep it.

intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:24

DS only really has his teddy at bedtimes/naptime, and will rarely take it out of his bedroom. I think it's better for them to get attached to a blankie or a teddy rather than a dummy, as dummys can cause dental problems and hinder speech development.

If you go down the blankie route, make sure you buy 2 the same, just in case one gets lost!

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:25

I dont think keeping it is an option as I'm sure u will get the problems eventually anyway. But going cold turkey... I hope i stay strong.

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intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:26

Meant to say that dummies can cause aforementioned probs if they are used for a prolonged period, ie into toddlerhood, as children will often talk from behind the dummy.

Call me a snob, but I personally shudder when I see an older child with a dummy in their mouths.

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:29

I agree intergalacticwalrus. My nephew (2.5) needs dummy for sleeping and even his daytime naps... I don't want this. And as you say, it's difficult enough to hear what kids say anyway, so prob impossible from behind dummy..

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intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:30

Archiesmummy, you have MN to keep you strong!!!!

It probably won't be as bad as you think. Brace yourself for a couple of unsettled nights, but I think you will find your DS will adapt pretty quickly, Like I said, it only took mine a couple of days to forget all about it.

Nemo1977 · 13/06/2006 20:33

IGW also agree hate toddlers with dummies in mouth all the time. I didnt mean DD keeping the dummy more keeping it until she is a bit older iykwim. One of problems I have is that she is quite a sicky baby and while she has a fave ted for naps and bed it is her dummy that provides her with comfort. She also doesnt sleep very well at all so dont know how it will be affected.

intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:47

Sorry, my comment wasn't directed at you Nemo!!!!! It sounds like the time isn't right for you. Maybe give it a few more weeks or so to see how DD goes. Does she have it during the day? If so, maybe you could just give it to her at night when she is really fretful. When DS had his dummy, DP would give it to him for every whimper, it drove me mad!!!!!!!!

DS was a sicky baby too. He had reflux, which started to improve at about 6 months when he was sitting up more, and he was eating solids, so you might find she's a bit better over the next month or 2.

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:49

Yes, I have the same prob. DP gives dummy all the time, I suppose not to have to deal with whatever he might want.... Makes it harder for me though Not fair.

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intergalacticwalrus · 13/06/2006 20:51

Archiesmumy, is there anything else that pacifies your DS? I found (and still do) that distraction is a wonderful thing.

archiesmummy · 13/06/2006 20:58

Yes, of course. Singing to him always helps, but you feel a bit stupid in public. If indoors just taking him out onto balcony distracts him enough to stop crying. And obviously, playing games with him, but prob not good when trying to get him to sleep. LOL
Then there is always breast feeding him, but then that would be me using myself as a dummy wouldnt it???? He hasnt got fave teddy, but likes blankie over face when tired.

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Nemo1977 · 13/06/2006 21:03

IGW she does have it all the time..also has reflux and is in and out of hospital wiht breathing problems and has excema so can be a handful especially with having 2yr old ds and being 10wks pg again...will wait a month or so and then wean her off it.

juuule · 13/06/2006 21:05

A couple of my children have had a dummy until they were about 5yo and some haven't had one at all. The others had one(or 5 in the case of one child)for different lengths in between. They didn't walk around with them in their mouths all day but they did have them if they were tired or upset.

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cat64 · 13/06/2006 21:11

This reply has been deleted

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AdelaideS · 13/06/2006 21:20

Ds still had a dummy at bedtime until he was 5.5, , then he decided he was too old and got rid of it himself.

AdelaideS · 13/06/2006 21:22

He's just read that over my shoulder (can't sleep, too hot), and says I must tell you that he still misses his dum but knows he's too old for it

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