Preparing for DD2 arrival

[waffles1]

I'm expecting DD2 in Sept and want to start preparing DS1 for the new arrival. I have bought a book etc and talked to him about his new little sister quite a lot. I have heard that it could be a good idea to get some toys that are brought out during feeding time and just wanted to know opinions on what sort of thing to buy. I can imagine DS becoming bored of these toys after a few days so wanted to know what other people did. Also any other tips for when DD2 comes along would be great. Thanks!

[craigslittleangel]

DD1 is 2.8 and DD1 is 7 weeks. I was really worried as DD1 literally had people falling at her feet, she was that much the centre of everyones world.
We started off by saying she was going to have a sister and that mummy was looking after her. We encouraged her to come up with a nick name, "what should we call bump?" kind of thing. Then when in Tesco's (not every week though), I would ask her to chose something for baby - a baby grow or something. Occasionally we would ask her if she thought her sister liked this or that. It was all very every so often and only when it seemed ok. She was and is at nursery, so once we told them, they did a few bits on sisters.
We then changed routines, slightly that we thought would work when the baby came. For example, dad did bath time and washing hair. But I would dry her and help with PJ's. And either I or dad would do book. While the bath was running, my OH would stay upstairs, and DD1 and I would have a little chat/ read a book/ or have tickle time.
As she is at nursery all week, we changed drop offs and pick ups to ensure that one of us did the mornings and one the evenings, keeping to a regular time. We also chose a day each where we did both. Mine is Friday and it just meant, that we got one on one time with her. (at the moment its the girls time on Friday and she loves going for a little walk before we get into the car or feeding the birds in the nearby green etc)
Because of my OH's job weekends has always just been DD2 and me. So I made sure again, that there were routines then. Saturday morning we go to Tesco's shopping (yes, I did go the Saturday after DD2s birth and left her with a very tired daddy)etc.
I got her a little gift from DD2 and a card (she is obsessed by them) for when I had left the hospital.
We did read the story books about a baby coming and I basically just repeated some of the things in them. As she is also obsessed by stickers, I got her a sticker book (by Usborne I think) that does the baby is coming with stickers, which I put into the cot when she visited us in hospital so it did look like it came from DD2.
From talking to other parents at nursery, what seemed to have really worked is her age. Those with slightly younger children in the same class are having a nightmare with jealously. Don't get me wrong, DD2 can be clingly (mainly when tired) etc, but she loves her sister, and insists on helping with everything.
Oh and when DD2 was actually here, right away we got her involved. She fetches water to help when we changed DD2's nappy. If one of us is out of the room, she must let us know if DD2 wakes up or starts to cry. We read books to each other and then to DD2 and help DD2 come up with a new story.
Sorry this is long. But hope it helps.

[waffles1]

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply. All really great advice and really glad that you found the transition from 1 baby to 2 fairly smooth! I'll def be doing some of the things you suggested!

[craigslittleangel]

Reminded of something else this morning: when i'm breast feeding DD1 and I read a story/ feeds her doll (limited success with that one)/ watch a cartoon and then explain it to DD2/ talk about the nest meal. I always say when i'm about to breast feed and ask her to sit with me. She has yet to refuse and seems to appreciate the quiet time.

[anklebitersmum]

We made sure that everyone who was going to visit knew to greet DC1/2/3 first before going ga ga over baby. Simple but effective. DH would come in and greet the kid(s) first before coming over to say hi to baby..baby doesn't mind but the older one will.

We went shopping to buy a neutral (we had suprises) teddy that they chose for baby from the older DC(s) and kept their routine as close to the same as humanly possible.

The closest relatives (Nanny etc) bought 'Congratulations you're a big brother/sister pressies'. Just a non-expensive toy that other DC(s) would like-as baby gets LOTS of presents in their eyes.
With the older one(s) we did 'helping Mummy' a lot so they felt both important and involved.

Oh and if DC1 is very little don't forget to call DC2 by their name too..otherwise you end up with DC3(in our case) calling DC2 'Baby' for the first twelve months of his life

[TripleRock]

Following this with great interest as DC2 is due in Sept when DD will be 2.11

[anklebitersmum]

I know it's DC2 but the maggie suit was an absolute must with DC2,3 & 4 ..no fiddling with poppers in the middle of the night and with built in anti-scratch mits.

Off topic but thought I'd pass on a personal fave

[noblegiraffe]

The book (and DVD) Zsa Zsa' Baby Brother is good.

My DS was 3.5 when DD was born. He chose her a cuddly toy and brought it to her at the hospital. We had a present 'from the baby' wrapped up and waiting for him there. This was great as he got bored being in hospital pretty quickly and played with his new toy while everyone else cooed over the baby.

Luckily my DD feeds pretty quickly, but I can still read him a story or chat to him while she feeds. CBeebies featured quite heavily in the first couple of months. We kept DS at his childminder for a few hours, and he goes to pre-school so he still gets plenty of activity and sees his friends and his routine hasn't been too disrupted. DH gives him lots of attention at the weekend.

What has really helped is a sling. I mainly carry DD everywhere instead of pushing a pram, which means I can still hold DS's hand, go around the park with him etc without too much hassle.

Lots of hugs, kisses, and dedicated 1-1 time with him has helped.