What surprised you most about becoming a parent?

(87 Posts)
Keztrel Tue 18-Jun-13 14:45:46

Or did your expectations turn out to be pretty accurate?

That I really am a crashing great softy.
We had her cot set up in her room, swing in the lounge. We brought her home, and I realised I didn't want her more than two inches from me.
She slept in her baby bath on two dining chairs, right next to the bed for weeks until we had the money for a Moses basket.
At two, she's still cosleeping. I don't see this changing.

How much I hurt when she hurts.

How intensely frustrating it all is.

chubbychipmonk Thu 20-Jun-13 17:17:08

That you just get used to being tired. . .ALL.THE.TIME!

Oh yes, chubbychipmonk, I used to be an 8 hours a night kind of girl and 12+ on weekends, but since getting pregnant just four hours straight sleep is a real treat and feels so wonderful!

georgettemagritte Thu 20-Jun-13 18:07:11

How much my (previously perfectionist) housekeeping standards would slip - I'd never expected to be patting at the latest wee/milk/sick wet patch on my bed at 4am and deciding just to put a towel down over it and sleep on top. (I'd never expected several good mattress protectors to be quite as essential as they are....)

I didn't expect to have, in the first few weeks, terrifying intrusive visions (like flashbacks) of DD getting hurt in some way - I'd be feeding/minding my own business/eating/whatever and suddenly experience a terrifying vision of DD falling or being dropped and her skull smashing or similar. Now I know that this is TOTALLY NORMAL and every mum I've spoken about this to has had the same thing - it must be some kind of evolutionary adaptation to make you protect the baby - but if you're already sleep-deprived and feel out of control it's very scary.

How much I would like spending my time saying silly things out loud like "tummy to mummy, nose to nipple" at the start of every feed, or "where's that burp? THERE'S that burp!"

How much my relationship with my mum would suddenly improve.

How much I would enjoy singing all the songs to DD that my mum sang to me.

How much cake I could eat (have never had a sweet tooth in my life until I was pregnant - I have got monstrously fat just eating cake and chocolate since the birth...)

How difficult the first couple of months are - OR how quickly you bounce back as soon as you get a bit more sleep and readjust. In the first few weeks I genuinely thought my entire selfhood/life/mental peace had vanished forever - now a few months on I feel pretty much back to the old me (though substantially fatter.....)

How weird-looking newborns are, but how quickly they transform into the most adorable baby you've ever seen.

That I could do it smile

georgettemagritte Thu 20-Jun-13 18:14:16

Oh and:
How annoying it is when mum/dad/MIL/relatives keep saying stuff like "are you sure she won't sleep in that Moses basket?" after you've told them forty times she won't sleep in the Moses basket, even to the point if coming into rooms to find (previously asleep) DD howling in said basket with parent/relative standing over it saying "she really doesn't seem to like that Moses basket, does she" (AAAAARRGHHHHHH)

Peachyjustpeachy Thu 20-Jun-13 18:14:23

I thought that DD would be a 'blank canvas'... but no....she was born with her own personality and stubborn... just like her dad!

its a good job i love them both!

she had her own ideas of everything... even before she could talk i knew she'd be trouble! and she is the best kind of trouble ever!

georgettemagritte Thu 20-Jun-13 18:14:34

*of not if

SkinnyDecaffGiraffe Thu 20-Jun-13 18:20:10

Guilt about everything.

BastardDog Thu 20-Jun-13 18:27:18

How quickly I got sick of hearing the word "mummy". A million times a day, often in stereo. Drove me demented when they were little.

KateCroydon Thu 20-Jun-13 18:48:14

I'm only 10 weeks in, but right now:

How interesting he is. I always found tiny babies dull, turns out I wasn't looking properly.

How much time I'd spend stuck on the sofa or awake at 3am breastfeeding or with baby sleeping on me and that this is wonderful because I can finally read all those books I'd never gotten round to.

That I'm less anxious than I used to be. It's going to be fine. I'm an ok mother and he's an ace baby.

chubbychipmonk Fri 21-Jun-13 07:42:45

That the nursery that you spent ages agonising over what colour to paint, what 'matching set' to go for, that you had looking 'just perfect' ready for baby, that you sat in patiently waiting for baby to arrive admiring how good a job you did decorating it. .

Never ever looks the same again the minute you bring baby home! People just don't take into account your matching pastel coloured theme when buying you bright red, blue and green teddies, pictures, ornaments etc etc grin

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