I am the WOHM and DP is the SAHD. A month ago, I changed my job which is now your average Mon-Fri. I have much more of a commute each day so I am out of the house at least 10 hours a day. I see DS for at most, 30mins in the morning and an hour before his bedtime. He was 2 three weeks ago.
He has changed towards me so much. He very much favours DP which is completely understandable, but it doesn't make it less easier to handle. He never wants to kiss/cuddle me, I try play with him and he points to the sofa telling me to sit down. If I don't, he becomes visibly agitated before pushing me away. Once I move, he will chatter and laugh to his daddy and act as if I'm not there. He refuses anything from me in his bedtime routine. He tells me to 'out' if I try help with bath/teeth and will continuously ask for his daddy.
He hates me changing him and will scream for his daddy if I attempt to pick him up or get him undressed. He won't let me read him a bedtime story, or put him to bed. He refuses to say goodnight or give me a kiss/cuddle and refuses any affection from me. I got a wave over his shoulder when DP said to him, 'say good night to mama'.
It's soul-destroying and getting to the point that I'm dreading getting home from work. I always interact with him but he is simply not interested. I'm starting to regret the decision to have DP at home with him now and resent the time he gets with DS. I don't know how to improve our weekday relationship (he is fine at weekends, it's only on days I'm working he acts like this).
How do I get my child to actually want to see me?!
*This is not a WOHM vs SAHM thread, I simply want to improve my relationship with my child
Hi OP, my DD was like this at that age but now tends to go a little more for me - it will probably change as he gets older and he will want to spend more time with you. I found it quite difficult at the time - she would always run to dh when she hurt herself etc. But I was glad they had such a good relationship. It's much better now she is 4, and has been for quite some time now.
Hi, just another view point for you. Me and my dp do exactly the same amount of childcare and both work part-time. We have kept things as equal as possible from the start with dp taking 3 months leave after I had mat leave. Despite the time we spend with her being exactly the same dd still goes through phases of favouritism. She's had weeks when she will only want me and weeks when only dp would do. She's only 13 months so much younger then yours but it is still noticeable when she has a phase.
I have come to the decision that it's just one of those things Its not a thought out, personal attack, its just a phase that is annoying and a bit upsetting but if you ride it out it will pass.