Being fair buying things for siblings

(6 Posts)
Goingdownthegarden Thu 28-Mar-13 09:01:04

Dd (7) really needed a new bike as hers is too small for her and she needs it to ride to school. Her birthday is 6 months away. We were away on an aeroplane visiting family at xmas so she couldn´t have the bike as a xmas present. Now dh has bought her a new bike and ds (4) will continue to get her old bikes when he´s big enough. I feel awful for ds. He is a good bike rider already and will never get a new bike. The bikes are too expensive to get a new one when there´s a perfectly good second hand one from dd standing in the cellar.
I am now thinking of buying ds a decent present. I don´t want ds to grow up remembering how dd always got everything new and he only ever got hand-me-downs.
Just I feel it´s wrong ds now getting a relatively big present when it´s neither Christmas nor birthday. We have far too many toys as it is and as I´m not earning at present, it´s not like I´m rolling in money.
How do you manage this with your kids?

MerryMingeWhingesAgain Thu 28-Mar-13 09:06:40

I try to separate gifts from necessities I suppose. DS needed a new bike at the end of last year, DD wants one but doesn't need one IYKWIM. So I gave DS his bike for his birthday rather than Christmas, neither had (or needed) a big Christmas present.

I suppose I would have waited until a birthday or xmas TBH, a slightly too small bike for 6m is not a huge hardship IMHO. But if you feel the bike is a necessity for the school run I wouldn't feel obliged to buy the other DC something too- they presumably get the things they actually need as they crop up also.

celebmum Thu 28-Mar-13 09:31:55

re DS only getting hand me downs, can't you sell DDs old bikes if they are still in perfectly good conditoin and use that to buy DS his own bike. doesnt have to be brand new but at least he would see it as bought for him?

Goingdownthegarden Thu 28-Mar-13 11:55:11

Thanks both. I agree with you, Merry, that dd could have just managed for another 6 mths. But dh just went out and bought her one sad This is partly why I´m a bit annoyed!
But the idea of selling dds old bikes and buying ds new ones is a great idea, celebmum.

Grumpla Thu 28-Mar-13 11:59:26

If you buy your DD unisex frames (a better idea than "ladies" frames anyway as they are more stable) then you could look into the cost of having them dismantled / resprayed for DS.

I inherited quite a few bikes as a kid/teenager, my dad always did this and so they looked & felt brand new to me.

Goingdownthegarden Thu 28-Mar-13 16:58:05

We do buy unisex bikes expressly so that ds can use them afterwards - so respraying is probably quite a good way of making him feel that he´s not just got dd´s bike... and that she doesn´t then try to "reclaim" the bike as being "hers" when it suits her (this is a bit of an issue with us!).

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