Not sure if this is the right place to ask this, sorry if it isn't!
I was recently given a bag of clothes that a colleague's son had outgrown. I didn't ask for them but am very grateful and would like to show my appreciation somehow. The lady said that she didn't want anything for them but I feel like I should do something. I was just wondering what other people have done in similar situations. I know some of the things she likes e.g. baking, so had thought about a Lakeland voucher, but I don't know her very well and don't want to inadvertently be weird and socially incompetent!
I recently was given a very special hand-me-down by a not-very-close friend. I gave her a small, nice bottle of oil (sounds weird now but it looked like a nice small present to me) as a thank you. The next time she gave me something, she told me that she didn´t want anything in return. I think I had made her feel that I thought she wanted "payment" for the things and this had made her feel uncomfortable. I think often that all of this trying to be "quits" with people causes bigger problems than just accepting their no-ties kindness. It´s easier (and more appreciated) just to show similar kindness - to them or to someone else - whenever the opportunity arises.
Maybe I'm terribly churlish but I feel when someone offers or gives you a bag of clothes you're the one doing them a favour if you take it! They want to clear the space but they also don't want the guilt of throwing away perfectly good stuff even though they have no further use for it. So I'd also be in the 'a heartfelt thank you is enough' camp.
When I was pregnant I was amazed at how many people I didn't even know that well were trying to offload baby items on me. Now, having had my baby, I realise that they were probably trying to be kind and to save me money, but at the time I almost came to resent it as I'm not a fan of clutter myself and don't really like having things in my house that I haven't chosen myself. One person offered us a cradle they even described as 'slightly broken'. Ummm thanks but no thanks!