need advice

(5 Posts)
Zijamum86 Sun 12-Jun-16 00:59:37

My partners grandfather is in hospital and not in good shape. I'm trying really hard to be there for my partner as its a hard time. But every time I be there for him and tell him I'm here he shuts me out and says he's fine. Just getting a little bit annoyed getting treated like crap. What would you do in this situation? Leave him alone?
When i do leave him alone he is then asking me if I'm ok and why am I quiet and annoyed. Just getting confused. confused

Mycraneisfixed Sun 12-Jun-16 01:54:21

He knows you're there for him but maybe he needs his own private headspace. Just behave normally and try not to be sulky or in a huff if he doesn't want you to fuss over him.

RebelRogue Sun 12-Jun-16 02:19:21

Maybe he needs you to take his mind off it? Talk about something else,laugh,cuddle etc.what you would normally do if this wasn't happening? Maybe he can't talk about it,or wants to pretend for at least a few hours that this isn't happening and everything is normal.
You always saying you are there for him,is a reminder as to why you are there for him. Sorry, but i fucking hated it. For a few minutes my brain would forget (that my dad is ill and after that he died) and then i'd be reminded again. I'm sure you are lovely and just want to help and support him..but he know now you are there for him,so let him come to you when he needs you and he's ready x

Zijamum86 Sun 12-Jun-16 05:35:34

Thanks guys. Never been in this position before so it's hard to know what to do. Much appreciated smile

BitOutOfPractice Sun 12-Jun-16 10:05:09

You get in a huff because he says he's fine? It's your behaviour that's the problem.

"Being there" for someone isn't about saying "I'm here for you. You know I'm here for you right? Just do as you know, I'm here for you" every five minutes because that, frankly, is irritating.

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