I wet my knickers in M&S on purpose.

(181 Posts)
IPdaily Tue 21-Nov-06 12:17:00

Ok, so I've changed my name to protect my identity and from the life long ribbing I'd get on here.

I went Xmas shopping with my mother and we stopped at M&S for a bite to eat, I need to wee more but am also hungry -we had to queue for ages but finally when we sat down all was good.

I go to use the loo as by now I am desperate. There is a man outside the loo with a cleaning cart and he stops me from going in "I'm cleaning them" he says. After 10 minutes of waiting there, staring at him staring at the door I say "You're not actually cleaning them are you?"

He says "Yes I have to wait 20 minutes to make sure everyone is out"

"Well, I'll go in there have a look for you , spend a penny at the same time and we'll all be happy"

"No, I'm cleaning" he says

By this point I am barely able to walk and scream in an awful Nicki (from BB) fashion
"I'm bloody 7 months pregnant and need to wee for gods sake"

"But I'm cleaning" he says still outside staring at the door, now with his arm in the way of entry.

Right then.

And I wet myself in front of all the other ladies who were tutting at having to wait.

Cue one of the ladies in the queue getting an assistant who then got the manager who took me to the staff toilets/asked my size brought me some knickers and trousers and apologised profusely.

I am terribly stubborn sometimes.

WestCountryLass Sun 03-Dec-06 22:10:39

AbbyLou, those other women should be ashamed of themselves

AbbyLou Sun 03-Dec-06 22:10:24

I know what you mean Popsy. I bet people have far more embarassing wee stories than these. I have to say, the aforementioned friend of mine is notorious for her weak bladder. I've seen her piss herself (or nearly) quite a few times. She did it at a Derby County match once because she thought she could wait for half time and she did it on the underground once. Most times were alcohol related like the train one. We were going back to a friend's house who lived right at the end of the line and from the minute we got on she kept saying "I need the toilet, I need the toilet" every few minutes. We were all drunk and quite young at the time. Anyway, after about 20 minutes on the train it became "I'm dying for a wee" and she actually asked a man if there were toilets on the underground trains. The rest of use nearly wet ourselves laughing!! The journey was taking ages and we kept stopping, you know what those late night ones are like. By now she was doubled over reminiscent of a kid on the playground who leaves it too late. It all ended rather emabrassingly with her announcing to the whole carriage "I'm really sorry everyone but a little bit of wee has just come out and I can't hold the rest in any longer" at which point she literally gushed all over the floor. Most people laughed but one man was so disgusted he said he was ringing the transport police. When we got off in Stratford there were loads of police and we ran all the way home terrified that they were after us!!

popsycal Sun 03-Dec-06 21:55:01

i am not pregnant but have early pissed myself lauging out loud at this thread

AbbyLou Sun 03-Dec-06 21:47:58

My best mate did this once in a toilet queue in a theatre. We went to the toilet during the interval but of course the queues were huge. She had wanted to go from about 5 minutes into the play but becasue we were in the middle of the row and she was 8 months pregnant she didn't want to disturb all the people near us by clumsily getting out. Anyway, in the queue she was obvioulsy in some distress. She was dancing about and holding herself - with BOTH hands!!! Not one woman in the queue let her go to the front, even when she was in tears from the pain. I had a right go at one woman who made some comment about self-control and how my friend should have been ashamed of herself for showing herself up. In the end I asked several women who got to the front if my friend could go in next but they all claimed to be desperate. Inevitably my mate lost her battle with 'self-control' and weed all over the floor. She was so embarassed she just stood and cried while I took my jacket off to wrap round her bum and hide the enormous wet patch. We made a hasty exit a have to say. We have a good laugh about it now but at the time she was so embarassed.

donnie Fri 01-Dec-06 22:44:02

why didn't you just wee in his cart ? I would have done.

realjolly Fri 01-Dec-06 22:00:02

boboggglimpopo...got a similar story to tell...when I was pg with es and also working as a nurse a patient that I severely disliked anywya, projectile vomitted just as I entered the room...I mean, he hit the opposite wall of his private room...and I just joined in with the puking....lovely! Although, I suppose not quite as horrid as your story!
and LOL @ CMB

christMissybaby Fri 01-Dec-06 20:52:30

this thread makes me laugh. i wonder what the OP (whoever she may be) is thinking about this?

rubbing her hands with glee that you've all got so heated? or embarassed that she's shared this with you? or not bothered at all? i wonder.

well, it made for a good 5 min read from my point of view!

EniDeepMidwinter Fri 01-Dec-06 20:49:48

'good for you'

'good for you'

confirmation that you are all mad

and condone things on here that you would never, I mean never do IRL

you bonkers lot

yulemoonfiend Fri 01-Dec-06 19:53:48

ggglimpopo - have just wet myself (in the privacy of my own home)

satine Fri 01-Dec-06 19:52:10

Goodness, what an over-reaction to this story!

Good for you, IPDaily. Hopefully the shop might rethink the mad 20 minute rule.

hatwoman Fri 01-Dec-06 19:40:16

glimmpopo - what a great story.

tissy Fri 01-Dec-06 18:58:50

dd and I went into M+S yesterday. She needed a pee and couldn't wait, the loos were "closed for maintenance" and a nice lady took us upstairs to the staff loos. No floor wetting required in Kilmarnock!

EniDeepMidwinter Fri 01-Dec-06 18:53:56

psml ggglimpoppo

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve Fri 01-Dec-06 18:46:56

Not me.

boboggglimpopo Fri 01-Dec-06 18:46:47

When I was seven months pg and a nurse - this old chap with trembly hands tried to empty his colostomy bag in the loo, and slopped it all over my foot; he was wobbly on his feet and needed a hand to walk to the loo. I threw up all over him, just like that! Poor man. Then we both started crying. I couldn't let go of him in case he fell over, so we stood there sobbing in this sort of poo and puke half embrace for what seemed like forever. I still can remember the face of the poor student nurse who came running at the sound of wailing {wink]

I went on maternity leave that afternoon.

I don't think I could pee on demand though, no matter how pg.

FrannyandZooey Fri 01-Dec-06 18:45:22

No, it's not me and I don't think it's Greeny. I agree with Enid - it is a "god do you know what I really wish I had had the nerve to piss myself in front of that old tosser and I think I'll tell MN I did" sort of thing

Zog Fri 01-Dec-06 18:42:27

Oh OK, it's a Greeny/F&Z wind-up. That explains it.

FrannyandZooey Fri 01-Dec-06 18:39:35

"Is this really going to be one of those threads where people get all riled and huffy and put each other's more outrageous statements into quotes?"

Good god Greeny what a thing to say

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve Fri 01-Dec-06 18:36:10

Is this really going to be one of those threads where people get all riled and huffy and put each other's more outrageous statements into quotes?

Oh dear, sorry, I though it was funny

<crawls away to find a more childish thread to play on>

zippitippitoes Fri 01-Dec-06 18:34:01

I think it is self deception..the story has been told to excuse the embarrassment of loss of bladder control in public and the poster has dissassociated herself in such a way that she explains it by creating her own myth from id which absolves her of guilt and humiliation and reasserts her ego in a position of control

Zog Fri 01-Dec-06 18:33:45

"It is pretty infuriating trying to hold in a piddle when you are heavily pregnant though"

Well, quite, which is why most pregnant women tend to go when they first need a wee, rather than leaving it until they're virtually wetting themselves

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve Fri 01-Dec-06 18:32:08

No offence Enif, I was only poking fun <don't-be-offended emoticon>

It is pretty infuriating trying to hold in a piddle when you are heavily pregnant though, it doesn't horrify me that much that someone might just "let go"...

lockets Fri 01-Dec-06 18:31:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hatwoman Fri 01-Dec-06 18:30:46

has anyone on here actually tried to piss themselves? it is virtually impossible. in my younger days someone I know tried, in the interests of scientific research, reasonably full bladder, fully clothed, in his own front room. it took him about 45 minutes of serious concentration. (admittedly he wasn't 7 months pg)

EniDeepMidwinter Fri 01-Dec-06 18:30:05

yes

luckily that hangup is not wetting myself like an animal if i don't get my own way

it has stood me in good stead so far

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