Swagger Inn. Can you believe we are still Wenching and that is almost July?! Thread 31.

(1000 Posts)
MalcolmTuckersMistress Thu 26-Jun-14 11:06:05

I think we will end up like this forever.

In your big fat sausage





FolknNorah Tue 01-Jul-14 09:59:47

<HBS> to ali and her grandma
Happy birthday <HBS> to ww

Well malc you were early sweet and nervous and a bit giggly and shy. I'd been sitting with him (?) in a train station cafe. (I don't even know if such things exist anymore) whilst waiting for you. There was no where else for him to sit so he sat with me and we were chatting.
I saw you and we left together and I introduced you.

Then I got disturbed by the feathery beaky bastards outside, so it all got a bit hazy but I'm positive you went into a photo booth with him and I looked away at the trains coming in and out as it shook a lot bit.

Then I woke up smiling in a 'what is she like?' Sort of way. You were lovely in an au naturelle way (as of course I was) and he was enchanted.

JessCate Tue 01-Jul-14 09:43:48

madame grin very funny wink

QueenAnneofAustriaSpain Tue 01-Jul-14 09:37:38

Oh yes, Happy Birthday Wicked. (I keep reading Weight Watchers becasue every wench insists on WW).

Apricot - meant to congratulate you on getting all of the stories together there.

ApricotCrush Tue 01-Jul-14 09:29:24

Well done Madame [claps]

<lunges slowmotion style for TB/Athos>

ApricotCrush Tue 01-Jul-14 09:26:01

Happy Birthday WW smile

Sorry about your grandma Ali thanks

Awful about Rolf Harris, always loved him.

That was a great review from last night Sparkle. I only found two bad ones, which I didn’t post at the time:

STL TV Review - BBC America's 'Musketeers' isn?t sharp

Boston Herald - Musketeers dies by the sword

I’ve been trying to find the US audience figures, but the Nielsen Ratings are very complicated. We didn’t appear in the top 100 programmes for the week for ep 1 as far as I could see. sad

Have a rotten headache, and have to go to the dentist this morning. Woohoo!

Alibabaandthe40nappies Tue 01-Jul-14 09:25:56

Madame that is hilarious - so wish there was a 'Like' button on here!! grin

MadamedeChevreuse Tue 01-Jul-14 09:22:03

Good morning. This is a public health wench announcement.


There are reports that an invasion of the Body Snatchers has occurred there. Innocent holidaymakers are going there, then on their return, acting weird and distant for a few days. Then slowly, they begin to display characteristics and exhibit knowledge and interests that prove that they are NOT THE SAME PERSON AT ALL!!!! They have been body snatched by ALIENS!!!!!

For instance, a young woman in her 20s, lets call her "bess", who previously had no clue whatsoever about football, needed the offside rule explaining to her, and thought centre forwards were called "goal attack". Upon her return, she has been spouting all manner of shite facts about football, such as:

France have been playing really well so I expect they'll demolish Germany's non existent defence. In terms of a winner, Colombia and Argentina both have 1 impressive player each and a bunch of average players - one of then might make the final but I think the other final spot is gonna go to Holland or France.


Thank you.

JessCate Tue 01-Jul-14 09:12:15

ali I hope your grandma recovers, poor love thanks

slaps Peggy right well I won't bother coming back or catching up til after WC is finished as there's nothing else to watch or do right now!!!

QueenAnneofAustriaSpain Tue 01-Jul-14 09:10:53

sad Ali it is truly sad when old age catches up. I still have trouble remembering my gran being strapped to machines and things. My other gran just had a heart attack one day and although it was beyond awful my memory if her is as she always was. Thinking of you.

Malc - I had a little lump last night at Harris. I am so glad that his victims have got justice though.

DH threw out a 'its good to have time to yourself ' rant this morning because of book launch tonight . It's not my fault his interests only stretch as far as Eastenders.

Erm....p.s ..... If that's alright with other Athos queue members grin <follows Elk's manners>

Oh Alibabs thanks so sorry to hear about your grandma. I hope your dad gets some results and grandma makes a full recovery. xx

Comtess - just awww!

Malc - it's just appalling isn't it. How much deceit. What Savile did was just abhorrent, but we can all look at him now and for some reason not feel altogether surprised. Because he just seems creepy. Though I didn't feel like that as child <shudders> But Harris?! Icons/celebs from that era didn't seem to get much cleaner and wholesome than him. He always looked and seemed like a teddy bear.

Hope all wenches are feeling alright and have a good day. Jess - STFU about football, wench! The only balls allowed in the Tavern are the physically attached, jizz producing kind. Oh and Tsonga obvs. But he's practically Porthos.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WICKEDWENCH wine cake you can have Tom for 1 hour starting..........now!

AnneElkMiss Tue 01-Jul-14 09:05:26

Have some thanks Alibab !

AnneElkMiss Tue 01-Jul-14 09:04:58

Happy Birthday WW, and kudos to your mum...that's some toyboy she's landed. Nice one. Just to be clear, you can have a 5 minute snog with inflatable Athos and maybe a quick tit grope in honour of your birthday....as long as that's ok with the rest of "team" Athos

Alibab [thank], really sorry to hear that. It's hard enough worrying about your loved one without the lack of communication that (speaking from experience) so often happens. I hope your grandma picks up soon xx

Alibabaandthe40nappies Tue 01-Jul-14 08:46:16

Morning Wenches!

Mavis I feel your pain. My Mum's mum once decided that my brother's hair was too long when he was staying with her, and cut it herself with the kitchen scissors - using a pudding basin over his head to ensure that it was even all the way around grin
It has been known as 'The Monk Cut' for the last 30 years in our family - and I have just outed myself if either my mother or brothers are lurking grin

Bad morning this morning, my grandma (dad's mum) is v.poorly. She fell and broke her arm last week doing something she shouldn't have been silly lady and has been in hospital ever since. She seems to have developed an infection which they are treating, but.. she's almost 91. Anyway Dad (retired consultant) going up there today to throw his weight around a bit as we don't seem to be getting much info.
sadsad Am so sad, she's been such a big part of my life and always seemed indestructible.

Stinkle Tue 01-Jul-14 08:26:47

Morning all!

Off to watch DD in some boring-assed athletics thing today.

Hope everyone has a lovely day!


JessCate Tue 01-Jul-14 08:20:18

Morning! I am too tired, all this late football is doing nothing for my health and well being sad

comtess I haven't caught up but how did the DS1 'sleepover' go?

anne no I was merely referring to the France vs. Germany game - France have been playing really well so I expect they'll demolish Germany's non existent defence. In terms of a winner, Colombia and Argentina both have 1 impressive player each and a bunch of average players - one of then might make the final but I think the other final spot is gonna go to Holland or France.

Why is it sunny all week and then rain at the weekend? Work life is so unfair sad

Oh, btw, I had a dream about TB ..... but not a god one .... he was in a relationship with my MOTHER shock shock shock

And I really wanted to ask her how he was in bed, but I couldn't, because she is my MOTHER!!!!!

So ...... It's your birthday WW.

I have a present for you.

It's in my pants.

Come and get it you dirty, dirty Scandi wench .....

LetUsPrey Tue 01-Jul-14 08:07:00

Morning wenches.

I know what you mean Malc.

That is very sweet Comtess!

Interesting days for the wenches.

Totally forgot what I was going to say. Ah well, can't have been important. Laterz wenches x

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