A little background first, I am a lone father of two boys age 7 and 11 years. I have been their sole carer for over 3 years now, oh and as it maybe pertinent to this post my oldest is my stepson and Asian and my youngest is my biological son and mixed race. Anyhow, today 7 year old boy told me he had asked his friend to ask his mum if it was OK for him to go round their house to play. His friend did so and then told my son could not play round as his mum said she did not like me(his dad). This came as a surprise to me as I cannot even remember what his mum looks like as I am a fairly shy man and keep myself to myself. Therefore, caught off guard when my son told me this( it was morning on the walk to school) I just said to him how can she not like me when she doesn't know me? He just replied that he didn't know but that was what his friend told him and that maybe it is because I am still a little fat( I am carrying about 20 kilos too much, although I have lost 25 kilos in the last two years). I can only guess at this woman's reasons for her dislike, maybe my boy was right, maybe it is really racism against my son and his brother but she couldn't say that to her son, maybe she disliked me as I was a man raising children alone( I have encountered some animosity from the occasional chauvinistic woman who see child rearing as their 'turf'. I just told my boy that weak people judge other people without knowing them and not to worry about it. However, he was upset and I am upset that this woman didn't just tell her son she was too busy or something as my son is upset now. In truth I am happy in a way as I do not want him spending time with someone like she appears to be( judging from this incident alone, as I can not place her). Does this make me as bad as her? What can I tell my son to make him feel better?
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