Daughter feels lonely...and wants a sibling.

(7 Posts)
Tubemole1 Sun 15-Dec-13 20:40:53

My daughter is seven and cries a lot because she says she is lonely. She blames dh and me for not having another child. She says every time dh or I leave the room she feels lonely. I am at a loss as to what to do next.

At weekends my daughter sees her school friends and cousin regularly, in an attempt to evade loneliness. We invite her friends for tea, and take them out together too. One of her friends is also an only child but this doesn't seem to help.

I can't and do not want more children because we can't afford it, our accommodation is too small, and I have health problems which make a new pregnancy difficult. I tell my daughter, I would rather give all my attention to her, than divide it between two or more. Perhaps that's part of the problem.

She is a good girl, a good pupil at school, I have no other problems with her than her confidence and shyness. I would appreciate some guidance from parents with one child who have been in the same situation. Thanks.

RVPisnomore Sun 15-Dec-13 20:43:53

I only have my DS and there was a time when he wanted a sibling but it wasn't going to happen so we were straight with him and say that. However, we did get a puppy and he now says the dog is his little brother so doesn't feel like an only child now.

girliefriend Sun 15-Dec-13 20:46:56

Yes a pet is a good idea, we have a cat which dd adores and it does make our very small family feel more complete.

I would try and build her confidence up as well as this may be the issue not the lack of a sibling iyswim?

madwomanintheatt1c Sun 15-Dec-13 20:47:13

I'm not convinced this is a lone problem, tbh. Most kids (even those with siblings) go through phases of wanting their parents to have another baby/ wanting a/ another sibling)

It isn't something she has any control over, tbh, so I would just keep on keeping on, and she'll mature a little and find another focus. Also try brownies and the like in addition to school friends and relatives. Something like stagecoach might help, if she is an artsy sort. Brownies for quiet kids with confidence ishoos though.

I think she's just being 7. It's prime time to want a baby in the house.

TheAwfulDaughter Sun 15-Dec-13 20:48:51

I said this on and off as a child, but I honestly wasn't a lonely only. Just a bit jealous of my friends cute baby brothers.

Now I'm a smug only and happy my parents didn't bloody have any more! Don't take it to heart, especially if she has friends at school and cousins.

TheGhostOfPortoPast Sun 15-Dec-13 20:48:53

I get this all the time. I tell her that if she had a little brother or sister she might not necessarily get on with them and that she would have to share the attention grin. It sounds like you are doing everything right tbh. I would try to encourage some interests. We recently bought dd a guitar - she loves to sit and practice that. Activities like Brownies/swimming lessons/gym classes at the weekend?

I try to do baking/let dd have free range of the kitchen to make cookies etc. Have girly days, where I take her for lunch (she normally chooses Maccy Ds) then to a museum or something she is interested in.

Tubemole1 Sun 15-Dec-13 21:00:47

Thanks for all your replies.

We live in a small flat and pets are banned in our lease. But I think I could try and persuade dh to accept a hamster or something.

I could try and find more hobbies for her to do I will look on the school website and local forums for ideas.

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