scissor incident at nursery

[paddygirl]

My DS started nursery in August at age 3.5. When I went in to collect him I had often asked how he had been getting on and was told that he was upset at first but soon settled down and enjoyed himself.
Last week when I went to collect him one of the staff came to speak to me and told me that he had been using scissors that morning and had scratched another boy on the arm with them. When I asked how or why it had happened I was told that they only had DS's admittance to scratching the other child to go on and they asked if I would speak to him when we went home.
I should say that DS is a late talker, but when I asked him what had happened he told me that he was snipping paper, there was a bang and the boy got a hurt on his hand. He also stated the boy was sad and crying and had to have a plaster. I asked if he had made the boy hurt and he said 'by snipping' he also said that he was sorry and had told the boy to be happy.
Next morning I spoke to the staff, explained what was said etc. and was then told that actually it wasn't a scratch it was a cut, that they believed it was a deliberate but not malicous act and although DS had said sorry they didn't believe that he meant it but was just going through the motions of what was expected of him. They also stated that he would be excluded from using scissors again.
I feel really bad for the other child and am worried that perhaps this incident maybe the start of something more! but really I'm still not clear as to what actually happened as my DS is unable to explain any further. I also wondered where the staff where went it happened as apparently no one else saw anything and I wondered how they reached their conculsions about it being deliberate, not actually meaning that he was sorry and excluding him from future scissor use.

Sorry it's so long but any comments or advice would be welcome. Thanks.

[Cammelia]

This has probably resulted from the parents of the other child complaining. The nursery is proabbly frightened of being sued.

None of which helps you to understand what really went on.

[Twiglett]

From what you've said it sounds like

DS was sitting at the table cutting ..then he snipped at another little boy who got cut by the stickers. DS was made to say sorry which he did.

He did it on purpose ..but as with most 3 year olds on purpose does not mean malicious .. it just means 'oh I wonder what will happen if I do this'. IMHO a 'cut' is difficult to inflict accidently, a scratch could be accidental

He knew to say sorry if he hurt someone but didn't seem to mean it .. stroppy 3 year old behaviour for being in the wrong also fairly nomral

The staff were probably around but most pre-schools have many children to deal with

My issues would be

why was a staff member not at the table
excluding him from scissor usage would be fine in the short term but you would like him reintroduced to using them within the next month in a supervised capacity.

[moljam]

instead of excluding him from using scissors,theyre job is to 'teach' him how to use scissors.i worked in a preschool and even if your sat at cutting table a child can still cut something theyre not meant to without you realising(like hair!!!)is it you or the nursery who are reading more into it?i would ask them the last 3 questions on your post.does he have help with his speech?

[mumofhelen]

My dd attends two different nurseries, and neither would they dare allow children to use scissors unsupervised. I think Cammelia is probably right. The parent of the other child is probably asking how on earth could another 3.5 year old have the opportunity to cut another child?
I would also be suspicious with the different versions of events, and perhaps it's time you read the accident book to find out what happened. IMO, your child is being made a scapegoat for the nursery's lack of supervision.

[mumofhelen]

Also, what type of scissors does this nursery use? The ones it my dd's nurseries can just about cut thin pieces of paper and playdough, but that's about it! I've never known them cut skin.

[paddygirl]

To Moljam:

No DS doesn't get any help with speech. I spoke to my health visitor a while ago and she said that it was nothing to worry about, that they develop at different stages and I do feel that he has come a long way in the last few months, however anything to complicated does confuse him a bit and it was a few hours after the incident when I spoke to him.

To mumofhelen:

Accident book just states that DS admitted scratching other boys arm with scissors. The scissors are just the little rounded metal ones. My DS has used plastic scissors before but mainly for playdough.

[mumofhelen]

Those are the ones dd's nurseries use and your child must have had some force to "cut" a child's arm. I would be inclined to believe what's in the accident book - a scratch - after all it's a legal document. There's not much more I can advised other than remind the nursery of their statutory duty to supervise all activities. After all, you are not at the nursery so I don't see what you're expected to do to stop such incidents. I agree with another poster about being excluded from using scissors again. Somewhat defeats one of the points of going to nursery in the first place: to learn new skills safely.