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Please help me get through this week

8 replies

saladsucks · 19/09/2007 11:48

My 11 month old DD is settling into nursery this week before I start a new job next week. She is finding it very hard, she doesn't understand where mummy has gone and doesn't yet realise that I always come back.
And I am spending the time away from her either crying or biting my lip to stop myself from crying.
Please tell me it gets easier and she'll start to enjoy herself.
I feel awful.

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cardy · 19/09/2007 11:54

It will and it does.

What is she like once you have gone? I think the seperation and actually saying goodbye element of going to nursery that is difficult but once you have gone you'll be surprised how easily they just get on with it.

Both my dds did two days a week at nursery and although they sometimes cried (esp. at teh begining) when I lefy they were fine within a minute or two. My 16mth old neice recently started nursery and she spent the first two weeks being upset for the first five minutes then settling down. She now smiles and waves bye bye to her mum.

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saladsucks · 19/09/2007 12:18

Thanks cardy. I just picked her up after 2 hours there and they said that she "had her moments" but was quite easily distracted.

But all (three) times I've collected her she has been crying when I got there. Which makes me feel even worse.

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mishymoo · 19/09/2007 12:20

It is still only early days and will take a while for her to settle in but I promise it does get easier. A year on and my little DS still has his moments although they are very few and far between! Most mornings, I have to grab him to get a kiss and cuddle before I go!

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cardy · 19/09/2007 14:15

That is difficult if she's crying when you get there, as long as it's notthe whole time you are gone. It will get easier. The main thing is that you are happy with the nursery and the care that they are providing.

Having had 2 dds in nursery my advice would be to not hold back if you have questions and want feedback and don't be shy about telling them what you prefer for your dd.

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saladsucks · 20/09/2007 19:17

Today's update - she was much better today. She stayed for 4 hours, managed not to cry when I left her or when I collected her. They said she had been very good, she also had a nap whilst there which I think made a difference as well.
Thanks for your support. I never thought it would be as hard as this.

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Bundle · 20/09/2007 19:23

it is very tough, but it will get better, xx

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dcb · 26/09/2007 20:48

sounds like she (and you) are doing really well. I started my dd at around 11 months so she had time to settle before i went back to work. I htought she would never do it - she would scream blue murder whenever i left and take ages to settle down. she would also start crying as soon as i went to get her as i think she would then "remember" that i had left her. i felt awful most of the time. after 3 moths she no longer cries when i leave her - and i think she actually missed it when we went on holiday! i have great confidence in both the nursery and the staff - i think that you need to feel happy or you will never realx about the situation. it's a really tricky age to start nursery apparently as they maybe going through separation anxiety around then as well. hth

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saladsucks · 30/09/2007 22:57

Thank you. She had 2 days off last week with croup but it was starting to get a bit better before that. My fingers crossed that she's ok tomorrow as I start a new job.
I never thought I would feel so guilty, so much of the time. But I really want to work.
Thanks dcb for giving me a time frame - I have an end goal in sight! (in fact she'll be fine by Christmas when she gets a week off!)