Baby isn't settling, any tips?

[user1467107619]

Hi,

My lo is 1 tomorrow (eek!) and has been settling in at nursery for the last two weeks ahead of me going back to work part time next week. She's spent about 18 hours there without me so far and has cried/screamed for about 13 hours of that time 😢

We don't have any family local so she's only ever spent time with me and/or my dh. Outside of nursery she's independent, smiley and chatty. She's become more clingy since starting nursery but still smiles and chats as soon as I pick her up, so doesn't seem to have lasting distress!

Any ideas of things to try to help settle? She has a couple of toys from home but they don't seem to be helping.

Thanks in advance.

Carly

[HappyTalking]

It's a big change for her, like you say so far she has always been with you or your DH.

It's a difficult age because she is old enough to understand what is going on but not old enough to understand why or even understand that you will come back every day.

When you leave her at nursery make it short and cheery and always make sure you say goodbye, sneaking off can seem the easy option but in the long run it can add to the stress and worry for you DD ( part of the clingyness can be about not knowing if you are going to disappear).

It will take time, probably about a month before she knows the staff well enough to be comfortable and even then the seperation in the mornings can still be tough.

Good luck and try to stick with it.

[Bubblyface]

I'm having the same. My girl is very independent at playgroups and stuff so I thought she'd be okay but apparently she cried throughout her settling in session. It's so heartbreaking

[user1467107619]

Mine was a bit better yesterday (6th session), still cried on and off but some smiles and chatting too so I now have hope that we're on the up!

Hope you see some improvement too Bubblyface x

[TheCricketWidow]

Sounds like you might be turning a corner now...hopefully she's building a good relationship with her key person?

[StepfauxWife]

My DD was 10-11 months when she settled in - it took three weeks in total. I had to extend my maternity leave by a week because of it.

I agree with a cheery goodbye and then a swift exit. Our settling in was an hour, then two hours, then a meal, then a meal and a nap, etc. By the middle of the third week, she was very happy and I was confident to leave her. Now she is three and I have a job getting her to leave!

The nursery staff will be so experienced in settling children, please try not to worry (easier said than done, I was crying on the steps outside once ).