i think i'm over reacting

(10 Posts)
bigsuze87 Thu 05-May-16 06:38:07

I have two children that go one day a week yo nursery but on different days. My dd went on Tuesday with no problems (nappies were changed no problems) then yesterday my oh picks up my youngest (2 yr old) and he wasn't in a nappy and had wet through his clothes. He was told that they don't want the children in his room (toddler) wearing nappies just underwear! My dd is 3 and she still had her nappy changed the day before in the pre school room (we have tried potty training but she won't have it). So angry and upset I don't want him going back there I keep thinking that if I did that social services would be round!

insancerre Thu 05-May-16 06:49:43

Not an over reaction at all
They should have discussed it beforehand with you and agreed a plan to potty train your child when he is ready
They can't just decided one day to potty train the children without consulting parents
I would email a complaint to the manager and head office and see what their reply is
They are completely in the wrong
Even schools can't insist children are out of nappies when they start in reception

Littlefish Thu 05-May-16 06:54:36

I agree with insancerre.

Email the manager with your concerns so that you have her reply in writing.

In the setting where I work, any decisions about toilet training are always made jointly with the family, and 9 times our of 10, are led by the family.

It's completely unacceptable for the nursery to make this kind of unilateral decision.

WellErrr Thu 05-May-16 07:01:12

That is horrendous.

Unless it was just a terrible mistake, I wouldn't be going back to a nursery with such an attitude.

insancerre Thu 05-May-16 07:28:37

I've reread your op and this stands out for me

He was told that they don't want the children in his room (toddler) wearing nappies just underwear

They don't want?
Its not about what they want
Its about meeting the individual needs of the children and working in partnership with parents

I'm a nursery manager and I would discipline my staff if they implemented thiis policy in this way

flanjabelle Thu 05-May-16 07:31:48

It's unrealistic to expect all 2 year olds to be potty trained. They are being massively unreasonable. You are not overreacting, this could fuck up potty training for him as the message he is being given is all over the place!

MrsKCastle Thu 05-May-16 07:38:20

Completely unacceptable, but so bizarre that I would assume it was some kind of mistake or misunderstanding. I really can't imagine any nursery making a decision like that without informing the parents, especially as it didn't seem to apply to the toddler room. It MUST be a mistake,hopefully they will apologize profusely when you get in touch.

HSMMaCM Thu 05-May-16 08:55:15

I'm hoping someone just suggested early stages of toilet training with the 2 year olds and this member of staff got it appallingly, completely wrong.

Definitely talk to them.

FineAsWeAre Thu 19-May-16 19:59:34

Not even a slight overreaction on your part. I'm the room leader in a 2-3's room and would NEVER put a child in underpants without parents expressly stating they wanted them to be. It's not up to the setting to dictate anything like that, when the parents feel their child is ready, the staff should support them but that's it. I would be putting in a complaint.

user1463702394 Fri 20-May-16 01:25:49

Not at all an overreaction, I previously worked as a room leader in ages 2-3 children respond well to consistency. They should work with what you do at home and if you're having difficulty make suggestions to you. I would make a formal complaint, no child should be left in their urine!

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