nursery early days?

[dollysocksx]

Hi all. my 3 year old son started nursery last week only 2 and a half hours a day, first day was a hour and he was fine, second day was ok but started crying when i picked him up, monday morning, practically begging me not to take him, and teacher tells me he has cried throughout day but we try to distract and keep him busy, it kills me leaving him there so upset i know im not the only mum its happened too but it actually turns my stomach, i phoned after 20mins to check he had settled and they said he had but i worry so much hes my baby!, today he cried/screamed try to pull away from the teacher as i dropped him off, teacher just carried him in, was i in the wrong to let her do that?. He also crys when i pick him up and im really unsure why? :( really upsetting me now i feel so helpless, really does not help that he wont sleep till stupid o clock in the night( 11pm being earliest! :( ) any help would be appreciated thanks x

[HSMMaCM]

Work closely with his key worker. Some children just hate the transition at drop off and pick up time, but have a lovely day otherwise. If this is the case, a swift cheerful handover to staff is the right thing to do. If it's more than this and he's really struggling to settle, then you need to work out some strategies with his key worker.

[HSMMaCM]

Does he nap in the afternoon? What happens if you try and early bed time. Children sometimes find it hard to sleep when they're too tired.

[jendot2]

At 3 years crying at nursery drop off is very very common. Especially if it is a new place.
The best way to deal with it is a really cheery come on ds you are going to have a wonderful day at nursery. Quick kiss for mummy. Hand to key worker and leave. No faff, no fuss, no negotiations. You will have to be very hardhearted about handing over even if crying (even if you cry in the car outside!) then call of get the nursery to send you a picture once he has calmed down, I find it usually takes criers about 10 minutes to settle.
I would only be concerned if in 2 weeks time he is still crying 10 minutes after you leave.
As for crying at pickup he is pleased to see you, he is just learning that you are coming back (don't forget at 3 you leave him in nursery and he has little concept of time, when you will be back, if you are coming back) once he gets the routine and feels secure and KNOWS you come back this will stop.
Please remember that if you are feeling anxious about leaving him and how he is settling this will be having a huge impact on him. However awful you are feeling be positive, confident and get that big smile plastered on :)

As for bedtime... Why 11pm? What is your normal evening routine, daily naps.

[dollysocksx]

hey all thanks for your reply, he's been much better at pick up for last two days now, he isnt crying as much while there either his teacher has told me. He's non stop literally as most 3year olds are. Its my fault I've never set him a routine as my first child he's been very spoilt and I've definetly learnt my lesson! . I try hard to get him to bed and asleep by 7-7.30pm but he fights it so much he makes himself sick its so so horrible but he doesn't have a afternoon nap unless we are in the car simply because he physically won't :( it is very very hard and I am to blame, never thought it would be this hard if I'm truthful, but as I said my fault not his. He's been through a lot also, I lost my nan (his Nana) 6months ago and he was very very close to her and as young as he is I do think that it affects him. Its still the morning tears and begging not to go, but picking up last two days have been fine, thanks again :) x