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Has anyone else not sent their child to nursery until 4?

12 replies

mcmudda · 19/01/2006 16:46

Ds was 3 in September and has been eligible for 12.5 hours a week.

He and one other boy at playgroup (as far as I can tell) are the only ones (2.5 and upwards)now not attending nursery.

No-one's pressurising me (much!) to start him except the HV who (although great with health issues) seems to be implying that I'm hindering him socially. Other mums do seem very surprised when I say I'm waiting until he's 4.

He has playgroup twice a week and a preschool music class as well as going round to friends houses. We're in Scotland so he'll start school in August 2007,a month before he turns 5, so will have been in nursery for a year previous to that.

I thought boys in particular were meant to benefit from starting formal education later?

All opinions please

OP posts:
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HRHQueenOfQuelNoel · 19/01/2006 16:48

The nursery which DS1 attended only takes them (well did before it enlarged and became a 'community' nursery) from the school year in which they are 4. So DS1 started nursery the same week he turned 4, then started school 2 weeks before he turned 5.

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Prettybird · 19/01/2006 16:54

If you are doing plenty with him, I don't see that you're doing any harm.

Ds didn't start nursery till he was just about 4 (birthday in September - started a week or so before) - but that was only becaseu I didn't get my act together and get him enrolled at the nursery that I wanted until the November ebefore he could have started

SO in theory, he could have started in the January befroe he was 4 (like your ds) - but as it happens, the nursery schools in Glasgow were on strike that year until about May time - so he only "missed out" on a month or so.

He was also happily settled at his childmendier's and i didn't see the point of disrupting an establsihed and convenient routine.

The year at nursery was fine amd he got plenty out of it. I'm sire your ds will be fine too.

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ThePrisoner · 19/01/2006 22:56

One of my minded children didn't go to nursery at all, and just went straight from being a full-time mindee to being a schoolchild.

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rummum · 19/01/2006 23:05

Can you tell me what the difference is between a nursery [2 1/2 hours] and a playschool

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prettybird · 21/01/2006 15:07

A nursery (at least one which is eligvile for the 12.5 hours "free" sessions) will have trained nursery nurses and follow a sort of curriculum, even though the sessions are mostly about playing. It's sort of learning through playing, following a framework. They will also put together a portflio of yoout child's achievements for his transfer to school (at least, ds' nursery, which was a state one, did).

A play school is much more informal environment - often run by parents?

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TeddyRobinson · 21/01/2006 15:16

It sounds like he gets plenty of social interaction to me and I don't think there is a problem waiting until he goes to the school nursery. One of the mums at school (ds1 in reception) only started her ds1 at the school nursery and her ds2 is only starting there in Sept too (i.e. they have not been to childcare before that).

I'm not sure early nursery makes any difference to ability or social skills. My ds1 didn't go to any form of childcare until he was 2 - then he started at a morning nursery (more like a playgroup, it wasn't a day nursery) for 2 mornings a week. He gradually went more but only went 5 mornings in his pre-school year.

While his nursery did obviously do a bit of number and letter work, it was very laid back about learning to actually read or anything (this is why I liked it - hate pressure on small children and prefer them to just play before school years). Now he's been in reception since Sept and his reading is phenomenal - he has raced past those who were already starting read when they got there having gone to day nurseries that were big on reading adn his enthusiasm is amazing too.

In terms of social skills - so many people have commented on how sociable ds1 is 'for a child that didn't go to nursery' which I think is an utterly ridiculous comment. Of course you can have a bright and sociable child without sending them to formal nursery!!

Anyway, I've rambled - but basically I personally think that it sounds like your ds is getting all the activity and stimulation he needs and I wouldn't see any need to send him to nursery before you are planning

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bosscat · 21/01/2006 15:48

I think that they all catch up when they get to school anyway. Nursery children are taught more formally and that is appealing to some and not to others. ds1 is 4 and starts school in september. Whilst he may be more advanced in writing skills than children who haven't been to nursery and I am 100% sure they will all catch up and be roughly the same within a very short space of time. He is not particularly great at writing anyway tbh and I was amazed to see some of his christmas cards were completely written out by his nursery friends. I don't get stressed about it because I think they really will all catch up when they get to school. The only thing I think benefits nursery children is the socialising aspect but it seems that you are doing lots on that score anyway so I really wouldn't worry. You know yourself when they need it. ds2 has just started at 18 months because I've gone back to work but he was totally ready for it. Having said that we have just moved to a new area so I didn't have a network of similar aged children for him to play with.

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rummum · 21/01/2006 19:17

CAN I CLEAR THIS UP PLEASE

Playschools are not run by parents without any qualifications or experience.

I work in a pre-school/playschool.
I am doing my NVQ3 in childcare and ecucation.. this will give me the same qualification as a nursery nurse.

pre-schools/playschools will offer 2 1/2 hour sessions every day the term after they are 3 just the same as a nursery

We follow the same curriculum as nurseries and complete the foundation stage profiles, the same as nurseries.
Nurseries have qualified teachers working, as well as NVQ qualified staff (as far as I know)

both nurseries and preschools/playschools are ofsted registered

we often have children that stay with us till they go to school,

Nurseries are run by the local LEA, and preschools/playgroups are run by a committee of parents

some preschools/playgroups have their own premises others work from a church hall... Nurseries have their own premises, and some are attached to a school

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SEND YOUR CHILD TO NURSERY IF YOU DON'T WANT TO




Hijack over

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Tinker · 21/01/2006 19:22

My eldest only went to pre-school nursery for the year, er, pre-school. Only mornings as well. Rest of time with childminder.

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jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 21/01/2006 19:27

im not planning on sending Jessica to nursery until she is 4.

as far as i can work out, she will turn 4 in July 2008 so wont start primary school until Sept 2009 when she is just 5yrs.

She goes to a toddler group 3 mornings a week at the moment and really enjoys it.

My view is that I didnt have my children for someone else to look after them. I know it isnt possible for a lot of women, but i am in a position where being at home with them is much more beneficial than paying 2 lots of childcare!

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jetlagdZebra · 21/01/2006 19:28

In Norfolk people refer to Mother+Toddler group as "playgroup", thus the confusion, maybe. Back in Leicestershire, "playgroup" was Ofsted-funded & inspected for 2.5yo +.

The thing about a "playgroup" (Ofsted-inspected) is that the admin, hiring, personell matters, some of the health+safety, building maintainance if building is owned, etc., are run by the committee -- and they usually are untrained & unqualified individuals. But this is why "nursery" (not attached to a school) usually costs a lot more & runs out of termtime.

ON TOPIC.
I have a strong feeling that DS2 (June birthday) will attend very little if any preschool/nursery/funded playgroup before starting school, neither of his older siblings were ready much before 4, but they had autumn birthdays. I expect I'll also be getting the same strange vibes, mcmudda, if DS2 doesn't do preschool before school. But I don't care, it's such a huge hassle dragging DD (was 4 last October) to preschool right now; I guess I only persist in an effort to get her some friends before she starts big school. I don't think I'll have the stomach for it when DS2 is only 3... and around here, if they don't sign up for a space in September there's a high chance they'll not get a space anywhere; certainly there's nothing left by April.

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lockets · 21/01/2006 19:31

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