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Paul McKenna - Webchat about emotional eating and weight loss, Friday 10 January.

(99 Posts)
RachelMumsnet (MNHQ) Wed 08-Jan-14 17:46:11

Paul McKenna is back! He joined us last January to talk about his book The Hypnotic Gastric Band. This year he's going to be telling us about his latest weight loss programme Freedom from Emotional Eating.

Emotional eating is the number one cause of obesity in the Western World. Paul's latest programme claims to bring about dynamic and lasting change and help break the cycle of frustration and self-medication with food.

Come and talk to Paul on Friday at 12pm or post a question to him in advance on this thread.

TheDoctrineOf2014 Wed 08-Jan-14 21:33:31

Hi Paul

How is this message different to ICMYT, your earlier book?

Thanks!

RoseRedder Thu 09-Jan-14 02:03:11

Hi Paul

Do you believe if someone is eating a bit to much it's an emotional crutch?

Do you believe people can gain weight without eating more

I gained 3 stones when I was prescriped anti depressants......and I hardly eat anything during that period

Willemdefoeismine Thu 09-Jan-14 09:36:26

Hi Paul

I am a person of extreme or no will-power! My husband and I have given up alcohol for January as we did last year (and I did September too) and really after the first 24 hours I'm not even really thinking about having a drink (and know that I will stick to it).

I am considering doing the 4:3 diet as I could do with losing at least a stone but I just can't imagine myself sticking to it with a family to feed and working from home....That's probably just an excuse though....How can I change that mindset?

Your insights and suggestions would be most helpful....Thanks grin.

PS Loved you in Sherlock!

GinSoakedMisery Thu 09-Jan-14 10:20:39

Oh oh oh! Im at work but hopefully will get back before it ends.

I have been watching you on Daybreak this week, you do amazing work with people.

I am an emotional eater, my figure definitely shows it. I have a stressful life, child with SN, MIL who has her own disabilities who puts upon DH and I quite a bit and then the usual worries through other children and money. I used to be able to maintain my weight and was happy with it but for the past few years I have struggled greatly. I manage to lose 1-2 stone then something happens to rock the boat, I reach to food for comfort and bam, Im back to where I started. How can I get out of this, I really want to get out of this cycle.

cls77 Thu 09-Jan-14 10:34:09

Hi Paul

Can someone who has tried ICMYT a couple of times have the same effect? Or does the brain become used to the methods?

sweetiepie1979 Thu 09-Jan-14 11:33:29

I reach for chocolate and crisps or bread as soon as mytoddler starts pplaying up or having a tantrum. I het Fed up and feel I need it to keep going buy that's not true. I was doing quite well with the 5.2 diet before Xmas but now I can't get in the zone. Help?

Giddypants Thu 09-Jan-14 11:41:30

I eat when im bored, tired, cold etc what can I do to stop eating. I need to lose about half a stone.

Hi Paul,

I've got about 10 stone to lose and just seems impossible. Have done all the diets over the years (your ICMYT book is still on shelf after being used only once, didn't even give it a proper go!)

How can I get willpower back to last longer than a week or two?

Onefewernow Thu 09-Jan-14 13:20:46

I finally cracked smoking in September after years but have put on a whole stone, meaning I am now two stones overweight.

Wanted to start dieting it off after Xmas but finding it very tricky to get started...

OnTheBusesOlive Thu 09-Jan-14 13:57:53

Hello Paul.

You probably don't remember me but we "met" on your webchat a couple of years ago when I berated you for comparing me to Olive from On The Buses in your stage show (way back in the early ‘90s). Of course, that's all water under the bridge now, especially as you kindly invited me and some other lovely MNers to your seminar in Hammersmith.

That was a fantastically motivational day, and for a while I was all fired up, and received fantastic support from the "Paulers" on MN. I only lost a few pounds but the best bit was feeling in control of my eating for probably the first time in my life.

And then it all gradually fell apart; I just lost momentum and went back to my old ways. In some ways the whole day face-to-face approach seemed to work better than listening to the CDs. Now I'm a stone and a half heavier than I was at the seminar (and I was like the back end of a bus back then). I basically need to lose about half my bodyweight.

I've got bugger all willpower with diets; I end up rebelling because I don’t like being told what to do. I really like the approach of ICMYT but I’m starting to think there is no hope. I'm definitely an emotional eater so I will have a look at the new book in an effort to get back into a better way of eating.

I’ve got many questions but as I’m limited to one, I like to know if you have you ever come across someone who is truly a lost cause? Or is there always a way to sort them out? And if so, how?

Sorry for the ramble and thanks in advance.

YesAnastasia Thu 09-Jan-14 14:02:52

Hi there.

I have been grilling my 'thin' friends to find out how and what they think about food & being hungry. They still feel hungry between meals but they override the thoughts instinctively in various ways. Some drink water, some think if they snack they'll ruin their dinner etc. If I feel hungry, even vaguely, I eat. Even though I know it's unnecessary. It's an automatic thought process.

I have never read any of your books (sorry...) but I have read good reviews of them. Do you think any of them would help me change my thinking towards food & hunger? If so, how & which book?

Thanks smile

Solo Thu 09-Jan-14 14:05:17

Hi Paul, Happy New Year and welcome!
I'm hoping to make the webchat tomorrow, but just in case I can't...

I came to your ICMYT seminar 3 years! ago and was astounded by the effect you and it had on me. I lost 2 stones altogether which was great, but sadly, I have gained half of that back and cannot seem to get back into the zone to lose the weight I need to. I lose a few lbs and completely sabotage my efforts for some reason.
I hate not being able to wear clothing that makes me feel good about myself and that makes me feel frumpy. I am definitely an emotional eater. How do I sort myself out please? Some of the emotional stuff that's causing my eating habits:
I'll be 50 in March, been made redundant, my house is falling down, I'm an emotional hoarder, single parent with no support. Oh! and one of my 2 children is a 15yo Son!! grin (please tell me how I can hypnotise him to be nice again)

I take part in a 'Paul McKenna ICMYT' thread on Mn and we are very supportive of one another. We are just about to go to our 14th thread! Some of the ladies have or are thinking of buying your book.

Thank you in advance! <hopes for miracle inspiration>

thekitchenfairy Thu 09-Jan-14 14:48:58

Hi Paul

I am 5" tall, weigh somewhere around 10st, 18lb never lost post DS2 and after giving up smoking.

We eat healthily as a family, home cooked food etc and I exercise and drink alcohol in moderation. My BMI says I am overweight and I am definitely not happy.

I do not get supported in weight loss efforts as people continually tempt me with cake! I no longer have 4st to shed as I did post DS1 so friends & family say 'its just a stone you can lose it easily' But I can't.

I manage to lose a few pounds, feel great, but it is not enough and they creep back on. In 8 years I have lost no more than a half stone. Tried LC diet, WW, and gained weight while following SW and I think I am an emotional eater but do not know where to begin to correct this.

What strategies can you advise? Can I do something about my weight or do I have to accept that as a 40 yr old woman this is it and I should learn to love my shape a bit better?

Thanks in advance I really want to crack it this year!

VelvetStrider Thu 09-Jan-14 14:55:04

Do people fall into two different categories when it comes to emotions and eating? I've heard a number of people talking about 'comfort eating', 'emotional eating' etc over the years, but I can't relate at all. When I'm stressed, or unhappy for any reason, my body initially 'clears itself out' blush, then I have literally no appetite and have to force myself to eat something. This continues until I find myself in a better place emotionally. Sometimes I'll lose half a stone or more worrying about a particular circumstance in my life. Why do emotions appear to have the opposite effect on some people, causing them to eat excessively?

NoGoodAtWittyNames Thu 09-Jan-14 16:15:53

Hi Paul, I have your new book and it's an absolute miracle! I've been following your 4 golden rules from ICMYT for the last 6 years, but would always self-sabotage and give in to emotional eating. I'm only on day 3 of FFEE but already have a much clearer understanding of when I'm hungry and when I'm not and also the times I'm not hungry, I have a complete disinterest in food. The only thing I have found is that the urge to self-sabotage is very strong, which I'm guessing is my subconscious getting scared because it knows this process will work and it instinctively wants to protect me. Is this a common reaction? At the moment I'm using your tapping and havening techniques to keep it under control.

Thank you for writing such an amazing book, I think this is the missing piece to the zigsaw and truly will change me life.

PenguinBear Thu 09-Jan-14 17:24:47

Hi Paul, can something stressful can trigger weight gain linked to emotional eating?
If someone were of normal weight and then went through something very traumatic, ate the same food but literally ballooned, would your new boom be able to help? If so, how?
I'd like to buy it if it will be worth the money!

PenguinBear Thu 09-Jan-14 17:25:05

Book*

Hi Paul,

I brought your new book last week and am getting on really well with it, I've already noticed I'm eating less and really focussing on what I'm eating has made me realize that lots of food I thought I loved are actually nothing special and I get bored of eating it after a few bites.

My question is about the one area I'm having difficulty with; havening. When I recall an emotion or instance that has made me feel like eating I become so consumed by it that I can't focus on the techniques. For example at the moment I'm stressed about social services involvement and a court case involving a close family member. I feel helpless to help him and stressed, this makes me want to eat. However, when I call these emotions to mind I become worried and the problems go round and round in my head (and I feel like I have a huge knot in my stomach). This means I can't focus on the positive visualizations just on the negative emotions.

Can you help me get past this so I can get the most out of the plan?

Also do you have any plans for more seminars; I think I might benefit from a personalized experience?

Thank you and sorry for the length.

onetiredmummy Thu 09-Jan-14 18:20:46

Hi Paul,

Why do people repeatedly self sabotage their efforts?

How can persistent self sabotage be stopped if there's no apparent reason for it?

Thanks smile

Temperate Thu 09-Jan-14 18:56:35

Hi Paul,
Walking down the stairs after putting the children to bed, already my mind is in the kitchen, searching out something to snack on - chocolate, usually. There's hardly been a night for months now that I haven't eaten rubbish of some kind.

I've broken this cycle before, but I would like to understand it, and avoid it. Previous to this phase I had 6 great months of very clean eating and loads of exercise. Did I just get bored? Help!

OnTheBusesOlive Thu 09-Jan-14 19:58:23

"At the moment I'm using your tapping and havening techniques to keep it under control."

I'm never managed to get to grips with the tapping and havening. I always feel faintly ridiculous and a tad sceptical. I presume they're some sort of displacement activity to stop you thinking about cravings. <resists urge to ask for questions>

Louloulouisa Thu 09-Jan-14 20:14:02

Hi Paul

Is it possible to make myself like certain foods that I really don't like? I don't like any fruit, veg or salad, and really worry about my health, but they make me gag sad

PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEEAAAASE help smile

Lou smile x

Jellybeans456 Thu 09-Jan-14 20:36:24

Hi Paul

So glad you're coming on here. Not sure I will be here tomorrow, but will try my best. I've read ICMYT, and the hypnotic gastric band book, but have recently fallen off the wagon due to my emotional eating.

I know emotional eating is the crux of my weight problem, as I eat healthy small meals, but can't seem to stop the snacking of chocolate and sweets in between. Lots of things seem to set me off, my husbands moaning, my 3 yr olds tantrums, and I definatelty do this eating to make myself feel better.

Incidentally years ago, I took anti depressants for a couple of months, and the weight just dropped off me, and I did'nt feel the need for this snacking.

This makes me wonder If emotional eating is also linked to low levels of serotonin, and is this my real issue? If so, what should I do?

I recall reading something about this in your books.

I also suffer from an under active thyroid, so don't know if this is linked.

Need some help please, as don't ever want to go back to diets.

Incidentally, dieting on a VLCD last year for 6 months did untold damage emotionally, although I did get thin. Came off the dieting and got big again.

Sorry for the long post, but just looking for some answers smile

tinypumpkin Thu 09-Jan-14 20:41:46

Paul, what is your biggest vice and thing that you have to battle with the most yourself?

TheDietStartsTomorrow Thu 09-Jan-14 20:57:22

Hi Paul, I saw a Youtube clip of yours where a lady from the audience was told to imagine maggots and jellied eels on chocolate as a technique to put her off. I thought I'd try the same and as chocolate has always been my nemesis and stood in the way of weight loss figured I'd try putting myself off it using the same technique. So I imagined chocolate as .... ahem..... (I apologise in advance for the vulgarity).. poo. I thought there's nothing worse than that to put you off. So I imagined the soft, gooey, slightly grainy texture of the chocolate swirling around my mouth as poo in an attempt to put me off. Hey ho, what do you know? I actually still finished the whole bar and had two more just for good measure.

What can I do to make this technique more effective for me? I honestly feel that if I conquered the urge to reach for chocolate I'd be a lot more successful in my endeavour to shift these last 20lbs. I just can't seem to resist it when I'm tired or when I feel I deserve a treat.

ponygirlcurtis Thu 09-Jan-14 21:00:31

Hey Paul

Is it possible to use your techniques to combat emotional eating to use with emotional drinking? I have a habit of using alcohol as a crutch when I'm stressed - there are lots of books about stopping smoking and stopping over-eating, but can't really find anything on combating drinking too much/emotional drinking.

Thanks!

Littleorangetree Thu 09-Jan-14 21:03:36

Hi Paul. I'm about 3 stones overweight and overreat to deal with nearly every kind of emotion - happy, sad, bored etc. I've done this since I was a child. I had a generally happy childhood, so I'm not sure why or how this all started. Does your program help people to understand the root cause of their emotional overreating?
Thanks.

waitingforgodot Thu 09-Jan-14 21:05:28

Hi Paul, the problem I have is that I reward myself with food or booze. Worked hard all day-have a cake and some wine.Tidied the house? Lets have some biscuits. Its my motivator. What can I do to break this mindset?

Sherlocked72 Thu 09-Jan-14 21:25:58

Erm, just to let you know it was Derren Brown in Sherlock, not Paul Mckenna ;)

Sherlocked72 Thu 09-Jan-14 21:41:49

Hi Paul,
I have struggled with my weight for years and have just bought your new book. I have tried to get in touch with you but can't seem to catch you.
I tried to do the Havening technique, but can't seem to image things in my head, e.g seeing myself walking down stairs, walking on a beach, imaging myself slimmer in future, thinking of my favorite food with hair and other awful things on it . It is very frustrating and upsetting. Are there anything you can suggest I can do to help, please?

SherlustHolmes Fri 10-Jan-14 06:27:50

Hi Paul

I struggle with compulsive eating. My problem is that I can rationalise things easily, make plans and decisions about my eating but when it comes to it I literally do not have an opportunity to think about it before the food is in my mouth. I know that sounds ridiculous but it won't be until I'm halfway through eating it that I actually think "I shouldn't eat this". Then of course I have the voice telling me off for wasting food so I carry on anyway.

I beat myself up for having no will power but actually I don't get the chance to put will power to the test. I've tried talking to two GPs but neither were sympathetic or helpful and I feel very alone and powerless. Any suggestions?

CheeryCherry Fri 10-Jan-14 06:55:03

I had a generally happy childhood, felt very lonely at times, and as a family we were not good at sharing or expressing our feelings (that hasn't changed). But I'm such an emotional eater, but to my shame I eat when I'm happy, sad, bored, frustrated.... I can't fathom why I do it...and as I barely register that I'm doing it I can't seem to break the habit. What makes some of us turn to food, but others turn away ? ...I wish I was the latter blush

Squiffyagain Fri 10-Jan-14 06:55:21

I have been hungry for 7 years now. Gut-wrenchingly hungry. If I relax for a weekend or go to a dinner party, the normal 'price' is 1.5 kilos that then take about 3 weeks to come back off. My problem is due to a metabolism problem that simply can't be fixed (I am missing completely a hormone that should be there and this is thought to be the cause, but no one knows for certain). I have a couple of times experimented with eating enough during meals until i stopped feeling hungry, and the weight gain was relentless and took months to get back off

I accept that I will always have to eat much less than other people just to stay stable, and I eat healthily and don't deny myself in terms of what I eat (it is simply the amount that's the problem). And i dont even like cakes or chocolates or white carbs, so its not as if i have bad habits that need to be fixed. But what can I do to stop the constant hunger? It's relentless, like living with a really bad toothache, and it gets me down more than anything. Is this something you have seen before and can help with?

VivaLeBeaver Fri 10-Jan-14 08:19:46

I'm currently dieting, trying to lose 3 stone.

Calorie counting and exercising. I'm so bloody hungry though. Part of me thinks surely life's too short to feel hungry and miserable like this. But then I think that maybe this is normal, to feel hungry?? And usually as soon as I get any hunger feeling I eat. But I'm guessing the thin people somehow learn to ignore it........but how? I have an active, stressful job where I'm on my feet all day and I'm worried about fainting.

theendgame Fri 10-Jan-14 09:19:43

Hi Paul,

I've used both of your books, and ICMYT really helped me shift my post-baby weight. But I am perpetually stuck, and at the size I have been for pretty much all my life. Unfortunately that's about 2 stone too heavy for my height. It's as though my body or mind just won't let me get any thinner, however much I listen to the CDs. What do you suggest?

mohhum Fri 10-Jan-14 11:08:54

Hi paul, i've heard your audios, done gastric band, i go deep do what you say but after a while i go back to my old weight. i'm stuck at certain weight. i'm 5'2" and 81kgs. i know there's subconscious resistance, i use positive language, affirmations etc. but nothing works. what should i do, please help!

JackyJax Fri 10-Jan-14 11:46:02

Hi Paul, In the moment when the urge to binge strikes, I can't seem to buy any time in order to use your techniques. It's almost as if I have the addictive desire to eat then whoosh! I'm off and eating. How do I manage to get in between the desire and my instant shovelling in of food?

RachelMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 10-Jan-14 12:01:36

Paul McKenna is now here at MNHQ and poised to answer your questions. Welcome back to Mumsnet Paul.

Solo Fri 10-Jan-14 12:02:18

Yay! grin

Rhythem28 Fri 10-Jan-14 12:03:24

Hi
What is the best way to succeed in the programme without getting back to old habits even after being successful?

I have not tried any of your programmes but weight watchers. What I have found is its not the food which makes me overweight but my thoughts. I think its for most people and some people constantly win with it but the rest 80-90% are the people will make money with weight loss programmes. Not meaning to offend you. Thanks

Solo Fri 10-Jan-14 12:05:10

I've already (kind of) asked a q, but I was just wondering, I bought your Virtual Gastric Band book, put it down for a while, went to start it and discovered (by listening to the start of the CD) that the DVD was missing. Can I still do the CD without watching the DVD?

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:07:26

Hi! I'm here at Mumsnet with a wonderful group of people and in an office with a positive, nice vibe.

Looking forward to talking to you over the next hour and answering your questions, some of which I've seen and are really, really interesting. If you're overweight, I want to help you. This is the area of work I'm most passionate about. This is the reason why this is probably my final book on weight loss, in fact this may be my final book altogether.

So, let's get going!

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:11:14

TheDoctrineOf2014

Hi Paul

How is this message different to ICMYT, your earlier book?

Thanks!

Thanks!

This is a great question. ICMYT predmominately focuses on changing behaviours and using hypnosis to lose weight through altering your relationship with food. The Hypnotic Gastric Band, which is my other book on weight loss, is a process where I hypnotise you on CD – and even though you haven’t had the operation, your body feels like you have – so you eat significantly less, and you don’t feel like you’re missing out.

This book, which will probably be my last book on weight loss, is entirely different. The other books are probably dealing more with the symptom than the core reason why you overeat. Over the last few years I have been working with a renowned neuroscientist and team of expert healthcare professionals and researchers on an amazing new psycho-sensory therapy. We have been helping people who have been in extreme states of emotional overwhelm: rape victims, war veterans and bereavement cases – with astounding, and often instant, results. The process is called ‘havening’.

I believe the number one cause of obesity is emotional eating. This is often caused by experiencing a trauma or a difficult time, or perhaps, eating because you feel stressed at work - maybe you have a secret stash of chocolate in your desk, or maybe when you get home from work, you feel bored or lonely. Either way, you’re not eating because you’re hungry, but because you want to change how you feel. The CDs and the DVD that come with this book involve a number of powerful and effective psychological techniques that alter the landscape of your brain chemistry-electricity. And as a result, you feel so good on the inside, you don’t need food to change how you feel. If all you did was lose weight, but you were still calorie-counting and worrying about food, then there’s no freedom in that. This book is as much about happiness, as it is about losing weight.

mohhum Fri 10-Jan-14 12:11:16

how do i join the chat, will paul write our questions here or there's a way of joining a chat room. thankful for any reply

rookiemater Fri 10-Jan-14 12:12:06

Hi Paul,
So glad you are here.
I struggle with my weight, have done all my life - I read I can make you thin and try to use the techniques.

My question is that our DS (son) age 7 has inherited my love of food. He loves carbs and sweet stuff and we really have to limit it as he seems to have no off button when it comes to wanting to eat the stuff.

Whats your thoughts on the best way to get children to understand the importance of eating slowly, stopping when they are full and making healthy choices?

VivaLeBeaver Fri 10-Jan-14 12:12:58

You just type your questions here.

heirraising Fri 10-Jan-14 12:14:39

Message deleted by Mumsnet as it was spam.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:15:46

JackyJax

Hi Paul, In the moment when the urge to binge strikes, I can't seem to buy any time in order to use your techniques. It's almost as if I have the addictive desire to eat then whoosh! I'm off and eating. How do I manage to get in between the desire and my instant shovelling in of food?

First of all you won't. If it's happening automatically then first it's an unconscious habit just as tying your shoe laces or opening a door. That's why you need to re-train your brain using hypnosis and the new havening technique. My personal recommendation is that you get 'I can make you thin' and use the hypnosis CD on a regular basis and in addition get the new book and use the technique called 'listen why you eat'. This will train your brain and muscle memory to respond differently to food so in the future you will feel differently to food. By the way I don't know anyone who uses my technique perfectly or any other weight loss programme and that's what the CDs are good for; you put one on at any time. Alternatively go to Itunes and get my new app and get me on the smart phone 24 hrs a day to help you. I know I have suggested three products here but for the £20 or so I think it's a good investment. If you go and see a therapist it's probably going to cost you £100 and you may need to go several times - so it's worth trying a less expensive technique first - I hope this helps. Good luck!

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:20:34

PenguinBear

Hi Paul, can something stressful can trigger weight gain linked to emotional eating?
If someone were of normal weight and then went through something very traumatic, ate the same food but literally ballooned, would your new boom be able to help? If so, how?
I'd like to buy it if it will be worth the money!

Hi PenguinBear. This is an unusual, but very interesting question. First of all, if someone were genuinely eating literally the same amount of food, and they ballooned, I would check with their doctor that there wasn't some other medical issue, just to be sure. So please take some medical advice. If someone gains weight after a trauma, sometimes they eat without realising. In this case, this book would be very helpful. It's 12 quid - a therapist will be £100/go - one might have to go 5/6 times. So, in terms of relative costs, I think it's a good starting point.

Plus, if you don't like it, you can always put it on ebay! wink

I'm very good at not eating, but as soon as I start, it find it really hard to stop and keep thinking about what else I could eat. Do you have any suggestions about how to break out of that thought cycle?

I meant to add that I wonder if it's because I find eating so pleasurable that my brain wants more.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:23:23

RoseRedder

Hi Paul

Do you believe if someone is eating a bit to much it's an emotional crutch?

Do you believe people can gain weight without eating more

I gained 3 stones when I was prescriped anti depressants......and I hardly eat anything during that period

Everyone changes the way they feel by some external means: drinking, drug taking, gambling, sex, shopping – all the things that we enjoy! And, of course, food is the world’s drug of choice. The only way to lose weight is to move less and move your body more. The chances are, if you are eating less and still haven’t lost weight, that your metabolism is too slow. This will have been caused undoubtedly by dieting, because your body starves itself but you also increase your ability to store fat – so when you come off the diet, there is 7/1- chance is that you will put on more weight than before.

The good news is metabolism is not a death sentence. The best way to slow your metabolism and gain weight is to diet regularly. However, the best way to speed your metabolism up is to move your body. Any movement at all counts as exercise. One of the main differences between a ‘naturally thin’ person and an overweight person, is 2000 steps a day- and that is a fifteen minute walk for most people. So – walk a minute here, a minute there etc – and suddenly you’re taking as many steps s a naturally thin person. You want to get your count up from 40000 to around 10000, and your metabolism is likely to rise. You might find that results will plateau, and then indeed you will lose more weight. Either way – if you get your step count significantly up and move your body more – I can’t see how it’s possible for your body not to speed up, and you to not lose weight.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:24:56

GinSoakedMisery

Oh oh oh! Im at work but hopefully will get back before it ends.

I have been watching you on Daybreak this week, you do amazing work with people.

I am an emotional eater, my figure definitely shows it. I have a stressful life, child with SN, MIL who has her own disabilities who puts upon DH and I quite a bit and then the usual worries through other children and money. I used to be able to maintain my weight and was happy with it but for the past few years I have struggled greatly. I manage to lose 1-2 stone then something happens to rock the boat, I reach to food for comfort and bam, Im back to where I started. How can I get out of this, I really want to get out of this cycle.

Hi. Thank you for sharing with me candidly your situation. You are very much the person I have written this book for. The CDs, and in particular the having technique on the dvd will help you remain in a good, stable place when the boat gets rocked. I wish you in every way good luck.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:25:02

ponygirlcurtis

Hey Paul

Is it possible to use your techniques to combat emotional eating to use with emotional drinking? I have a habit of using alcohol as a crutch when I'm stressed - there are lots of books about stopping smoking and stopping over-eating, but can't really find anything on combating drinking too much/emotional drinking.

Thanks!

Yes it is. But the CDs and the DVD are geared towards eating - so I couldn't guarantee it would work. I drink, so I haven't written a book on drinking. But a friend of mine, Kevin Laye, has written a good book called 'Positive Drinking' - it doesn't ask people to stop altogether, but encourages them to reduce their intake, so that they feel in control, rather than the alcohol.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:26:43

cls77

Hi Paul

Can someone who has tried ICMYT a couple of times have the same effect? Or does the brain become used to the methods?

It’ a yes and no answer – the brain does get used to certain methods in many cases, However, this work in conjunction with my other 2 books/ CDs, and I believe you’ll find this beneficial. Plus, I have a new app for ICMYT which we’ve been getting phenomenal feedback on. It’s been cleverly designed by Paul Rice who’s one of the greatest app designers in the world - it’s like having me on tap every day. Check out – ‘change your life in 7 days’ (APP – itunes) where you can choose ‘thin’, ‘confident’ or ‘better sleep’.

Sherlocked72 Fri 10-Jan-14 12:29:46

Hi Paul,
I don't know if you have read my question above, so I'll post again.
I bought your book yesterday and feel like everything you have written is very true to me. I find it very difficult to visualise in my head, so things like the Havening technique and the self sabotage excercise are very difficult for me. I can't imagine walking on a beach, or walking downstairs, or say eating my fave food with hair and dirt on etc. I'm so desperate to lose weight as I'm in pain everyday. Please can you help me, or is there something I can do to help with visualisation?

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:32:42

sweetiepie1979

I reach for chocolate and crisps or bread as soon as mytoddler starts pplaying up or having a tantrum. I het Fed up and feel I need it to keep going buy that's not true. I was doing quite well with the 5.2 diet before Xmas but now I can't get in the zone. Help?

If the 5:2 works for you, I’m very happy for you. But remember – it’s a diet and as far as I can see there are no longitudinal studies – and whilst the are anecdotal reports of success, I can’t find a single longitudinal study. As we know, diet work very well in the short-term for people but not necessarily in the long term. if it’s working for you – great but if its not – try something else. I believe my new project could well offer you the support and change in relationship to food that you need. All your decisions about what you eat, when you eat and how much you eat etc take place in your mind. Your mind is like a computer, and it can be re-programmed. Thats the objective with my approach to weight loss, and I believe the results speak for themselves.

goatsaregood Fri 10-Jan-14 12:34:25

Your first response was very interesting - I often work with people who have been through traumatic childhood experiences and many of them have eating disorders. I'm not a psychiatrist or counsellor or psychologist but am in a position where they often ask me for advice/help - and very often they would appreciate something specific to deal with one area of their lives, such as overeating. Is your book something I could recommend, as in, do you feel it's as close to 'trigger-free' as possible? Thank you.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:34:35

Louloulouisa

Hi Paul

Is it possible to make myself like certain foods that I really don't like? I don't like any fruit, veg or salad, and really worry about my health, but they make me gag sad

PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEEAAAASE help smile

Lou smile x

Yes. It's possible to programme your mind to do all sorts of things. In fact I worked with somebody once, who hadn't eaten anything except bangers and mash since he was a child.

Really I'd want to know why you want to eat foods you don't like. Is it for health reasons, social pressure, or something else?

One of the things you may notice if you overeat and start to eat consciously, which is eating slowly, free of distractions and chewing the food twenty times, is that not only will you eat less, but your preferences may change towards healthy choices. Fast food, which is packed with salt and fat, often becomes less attractive than foods with nutritional value. I am not concerned with what you eat - that's the job of nutritionists. I'm concerned with helping you lose weight, which was recently confirmed by Yale University to be a behavioural issue.

In simple it's a yes, and any decent hypnotherapist should be able to help you, but I'm intrigued to know why.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:36:46

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn

I'm very good at not eating, but as soon as I start, it find it really hard to stop and keep thinking about what else I could eat. Do you have any suggestions about how to break out of that thought cycle?

This book is perfect for you. This is not an uncommon problem . If you can't have one piece of chocolate, but you have to demolish a whole bar - the chocolate is in charge and not you. It sounds like there is a similar issue with food for you.

First of all, I would like to say to you - it's not your fault, it's the fault of your programming. Your brain is like a computer - you've picked up some habits that run automatically in your mind, just like programmes in a computer. My CDs and DVDs are designed to help you reprogramme your mind so that you feel more in control. I would specifically recommend a new iPhone app that I have made, or the Freedom From Emotional Eating CD which contains a technique called 'listen while you eat'. This trains your mind and your muscle memory to slow your eating speed down. It then becomes so easy to leave food on the plate because the signal from your body is much stronger. Alternatively, the Hypnotic Gastric Band will do something similar - training your unconscious and your body to enhance the signal so that you will feel fuller much quicker.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:42:07

goatsaregood

Your first response was very interesting - I often work with people who have been through traumatic childhood experiences and many of them have eating disorders. I'm not a psychiatrist or counsellor or psychologist but am in a position where they often ask me for advice/help - and very often they would appreciate something specific to deal with one area of their lives, such as overeating. Is your book something I could recommend, as in, do you feel it's as close to 'trigger-free' as possible? Thank you.

Thank you very much for this question. I believe people who over-eat because of trauma are exactly the sort of people the book was written for and I want to help. In particular the DVD and CDs and the hypnotic trials on CD. Also recommend the Havening technique. See https://havening.org/Havening.org - the work of Dr Ronald Ruden Mc PHD is going to change the world. It's like =mc2 for psychology. You will also find examples of Havening on Youtube and my new book contains the DVD with 20 mins of standard Havening technique. For the more advanced techniques I recommend you train with Dr Ruden.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:44:15

Sherlocked72

Hi Paul,
I don't know if you have read my question above, so I'll post again.
I bought your book yesterday and feel like everything you have written is very true to me. I find it very difficult to visualise in my head, so things like the Havening technique and the self sabotage excercise are very difficult for me. I can't imagine walking on a beach, or walking downstairs, or say eating my fave food with hair and dirt on etc. I'm so desperate to lose weight as I'm in pain everyday. Please can you help me, or is there something I can do to help with visualisation?

First of all, thank you very much for your question. I'm so glad that you found that the book resonated with you - that's the intention of the book.

Everyone can visualise - however, some people think that they have to see things as clearly as they do in real life when they visualise. They certainly do not, in fact it's better if they're not the same. Think of your front door - you make a picture of your front door in your head - that's how you remember what colour it is. Recall the face of your best friend - this is visualising too. You don't actually have to 'be on a beach', you just have to imagine what it's like if you were.

Thanks very much. God bless.

Louloulouisa Fri 10-Jan-14 12:46:22

THANK YOU Paul

This is the BEST news.

I want to eat those things to be healthy, i hardly like any food. But I don't eat rubbish, my diet mainly consists of chicken/pork , sweet potatoes, homemade toast, beans & weetabix!

I tried a hypnotherapist but it didn't work???

THANK YOU :D

Thank you for your reply smile

goatsaregood Fri 10-Jan-14 12:47:03

Thanks so much for replying - training wouldn't be appropriate for me in my work (sounds much more mysterious than it is but hard to go into detail without outing myself and therefore compromising the anonymity of people I work with), but I will look at that website.

It's very interesting because I got your 'Sleep' book some years ago when things were pretty bad for me, and I was amazed by the results from the first night. I tell people but often there is a reluctance with some to try it, and the same can go for weight loss - fear of success perhaps?

I'm not allowed another question I don't think - but if the rules get slack and everyone feels kindly wink, maybe you could answer this: if someone has multiple issues they would like to deal with, and you have books on more than one (sleep, confidence, eating), how should they approach that?

Many thanks - will order the book today! grin

Sorry to repost but I could really do with some help:

My question is about the one area I'm having difficulty with; havening. When I recall an emotion or instance that has made me feel like eating I become so consumed by it that I can't focus on the techniques. For example at the moment I'm stressed about social services involvement and a court case involving a close family member. I feel helpless to help him and stressed, this makes me want to eat. However, when I call these emotions to mind I become worried and the problems go round and round in my head (and I feel like I have a huge knot in my stomach). This means I can't focus on the positive visualizations just on the negative emotions.

Can you help me get past this so I can get the most out of the plan?

Also do you have any plans for more seminars; I think I might benefit from a personalized experience?

Thanks

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:49:02

onetiredmummy

Hi Paul,

Why do people repeatedly self sabotage their efforts?

How can persistent self sabotage be stopped if there's no apparent reason for it?

Thanks smile

This is a great question and indeed my new book deals with self sabotage. Self sabotage deals with what is usually called secondary gain. In other words there will be another reason for doing something that isn't in your best interest. For example, procrastinators are rarely lazy people. They're frightened of making the wrong decision so they choose to make no decision. So the secondary gain is that they stay safe, however they lose out on achieving their true potential.

Recently, a lady said to me she'd bought my CDs but hadn't lost weight. When I asked how often shed used them, she said she hadn't used them at all. When I asked why, she said it was because she thought they would make her hate chocolate, and she loved it. Whilst amusing, this is an example of self sabotage.

Many people start a diet because they feel post-Christmas guilt. Yet as soon as they start it, deep down they know they're going to fail. A part of them cant wait to, so they can go back to eating their favourite foods instead of chemical, fat free rubbish. They want to get the struggle of dieting with over as soon as possible, so they can tick the box which reduces guilt - because they tried - but they haven't followed through with it.

With diets the cards are so stacked against you. I'd recommend not starting one. There's a 91% chance that you won't succeed and a 70% chance that you'll gain more weight when you come off the diet than you had before.

My approach doesn't work for everyone every time, but has a success rate of 70%, according to studies, and it's very different to a diet. Diets are concerned with not eating this and eating that. Some weight loss clubs are not in the weight loss business, they're in the food business. They sell you low fat chemical crap, which they make billions from, by the way.

My approach is an internal recalibration with food and with the world. We've had 40 years of dieting and yet obseity is rife in the Western world. I think it's time for a new approach, and changing our relationship with food from the inside is the best solution I can see right now and gaining the support of a variety of Doctors.

ThenAgain Fri 10-Jan-14 12:50:32

Have you got any advice for people that have tried your gastric band hypnotherapy but didn't feel the effect - e.g. didn't feel like they had a band? I loved your first book and so wanted it to work but just didn't get the effect. Should I try it a few times?

mohhum Fri 10-Jan-14 12:53:06

I'm disappointed paul. all you do is ask us to buy your books, didn't find any genuine advice. sorry

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:53:20

Solo

Hi Paul, Happy New Year and welcome!
I'm hoping to make the webchat tomorrow, but just in case I can't...

I came to your ICMYT seminar 3 years! ago and was astounded by the effect you and it had on me. I lost 2 stones altogether which was great, but sadly, I have gained half of that back and cannot seem to get back into the zone to lose the weight I need to. I lose a few lbs and completely sabotage my efforts for some reason.
I hate not being able to wear clothing that makes me feel good about myself and that makes me feel frumpy. I am definitely an emotional eater. How do I sort myself out please? Some of the emotional stuff that's causing my eating habits:
I'll be 50 in March, been made redundant, my house is falling down, I'm an emotional hoarder, single parent with no support. Oh! and one of my 2 children is a 15yo Son!! grin (please tell me how I can hypnotise him to be nice again)

I take part in a 'Paul McKenna ICMYT' thread on Mn and we are very supportive of one another. We are just about to go to our 14th thread! Some of the ladies have or are thinking of buying your book.

Thank you in advance! <hopes for miracle inspiration>

Hi Solo

It sounds like you deal with many of the challenges that mothers face, and frankly I'm amazed at how you do it! - so, it's understandable that you might use food from time to time to get you through some of the challenges.

Remember , it's not your fault - it's the fault of your programming. I believe this new book will make you feel calmer in yourself. However, if you want to feel better and improve your self-image. I would suggest you get my ICMYT CDs/ DVD (which are probably on ebay now!) - but will soon be on iTunes. One DVD in particular, called 'Your Perfect Body' , is very much about increasing self-esteem, which very often people who out on weight suffer form a lack of.

Remember your worth as a human being is the same today as it was the day you were born, and will be until the day you die.

You sound like a good person to me - good luck.

Sherlocked72 Fri 10-Jan-14 12:53:59

Thanks for your answer Paul. I wonder if I am trying too hard to recall things? But I just can't seem to see! when I close my eyes and try to focus my brain just says "I don't think so" and I just see nothing! so frustrating. sad

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 12:54:31

Squiffyagain

I have been hungry for 7 years now. Gut-wrenchingly hungry. If I relax for a weekend or go to a dinner party, the normal 'price' is 1.5 kilos that then take about 3 weeks to come back off. My problem is due to a metabolism problem that simply can't be fixed (I am missing completely a hormone that should be there and this is thought to be the cause, but no one knows for certain). I have a couple of times experimented with eating enough during meals until i stopped feeling hungry, and the weight gain was relentless and took months to get back off

I accept that I will always have to eat much less than other people just to stay stable, and I eat healthily and don't deny myself in terms of what I eat (it is simply the amount that's the problem). And i dont even like cakes or chocolates or white carbs, so its not as if i have bad habits that need to be fixed. But what can I do to stop the constant hunger? It's relentless, like living with a really bad toothache, and it gets me down more than anything. Is this something you have seen before and can help with?

If you're missing a hormone this is a medical issue and you need to consult doc. However, Hypnotic Gastric Band may help you to feel fuller quicker and hungry less of the time. Many people who use this book and CD report this is the case to me. Given this medical issue I can't guarantee results but do speak to your doctor and if they are okay with this, then give it a try. Good luck to you.

goatsaregood Fri 10-Jan-14 12:55:38

mohhum - well, there was genuine advice in his reply to me; he directed me to a website I had no idea about and suggested techniques that I could use for other people.

Solo Fri 10-Jan-14 12:56:01

Thank you Paul! I do have those CD's as I got them at the seminar! will start to listen again I think smile thank you!

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 13:02:33

tinypumpkin

Paul, what is your biggest vice and thing that you have to battle with the most yourself?

Some of them are not actually printable wink.

When my father died I noticed I drank more and whilst it provided a temporary solution when I sobered up the feelings of sadness were still there. I come from a family of people who are overweight but I was a cantankerous child and didn't always eat the food on my plate - I'd prefer it to remain on my plate than go on my thighs. I have problems and challenges just like everyone else. I am a bloke from north london, doing my best to help other people, which I do rather well but I'm not always the best at helping myself, then I turn to a colleague.

notso Fri 10-Jan-14 13:03:52

Hi Paul, I tried your gastric band book and CD. I felt great the day I did it but went straight back to my old habits of zombie eating the day afterwards. I confess I didn't muster the willpower to cut out the sugary fatty foods for the pre-OP. Is there no hope if I don't have even 2 weeks worth of willpower?

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 13:05:29

thekitchenfairy

Hi Paul

I am 5" tall, weigh somewhere around 10st, 18lb never lost post DS2 and after giving up smoking.

We eat healthily as a family, home cooked food etc and I exercise and drink alcohol in moderation. My BMI says I am overweight and I am definitely not happy.

I do not get supported in weight loss efforts as people continually tempt me with cake! I no longer have 4st to shed as I did post DS1 so friends & family say 'its just a stone you can lose it easily' But I can't.

I manage to lose a few pounds, feel great, but it is not enough and they creep back on. In 8 years I have lost no more than a half stone. Tried LC diet, WW, and gained weight while following SW and I think I am an emotional eater but do not know where to begin to correct this.

What strategies can you advise? Can I do something about my weight or do I have to accept that as a 40 yr old woman this is it and I should learn to love my shape a bit better?

Thanks in advance I really want to crack it this year!

The BMI isn't an entirely true gauge of whether you're overwight. Indeed many leading athletes come out as obese because muscles weight more than fat.

I would recommend in this case I Can Make You Thin. Even though it has a somewhat controversial title, it's really aimed at you being happy with yourself. Sometimes people come up to me in the street and say they've lost weight. I ask how much, and they say they don't know because they no longer weigh themselves, which is music to my ears.

The fact you're unhappy is of greater concern to me. It seems you have more of a self image challenge than a weight challenge. It's not uncommon for people to get upset about losing those last ten pounds. I believe the hypnotic gastric band will really help you lose those last pounds. However, I'd also recommend to you that you get my DVD set, which is on eBay or my site paulmckenna.com. The DVD Your Perfect Body should help to significantly improve your self image, which I believe could possibly do with a boost.

Sounds like you're doing better than you realise, but good for you for wanting to do even more. Thanks for your question, God bless.

MrsFeathersword Fri 10-Jan-14 13:08:07

Paul, I've noticed your Confidence CD also makes me want to eat less - I think that does suggest for me (and others I'd imagine) overeating is more about feelings than straightforward "greed".

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 13:13:54

mohhum

I'm disappointed paul. all you do is ask us to buy your books, didn't find any genuine advice. sorry

Well, I'm sorry you feel this way because the book I have just written has taken a year to write and a decade to research. If I worked with people one-to-one, I'd probably get to help a few thousand people in my lifetime - with my books, DVDs, CDs and apps, I have been able to reach millions of people. My goal is to improve the lives of others. The reason I suggest buying the books is that it's a very inexpensive approach to what is often a significant problem for people in their lives. In fact, if you go see a therapist - it may cost you £100 per session, and you may need several sessions. I believe the DVD is an inexpensive solution.

I'm not doing this purely for commercial reasons. In fact, if all I was interested in is money, I'd be in banking or oil, and a lot richer, like some of my friends. I particularly like helping people lose weight because I think I've made a certain breakthrough in this area. I can only give a certain amount of advice during a webchat, and in many cases, the techniques need to be absorbed and practiced several times. Actually, I don't need to be here today or do anything ever gain if I don't want to! I do this job because I genuinely enjoy helping people.

I understand why people are sceptical because they'v been sold to over and over again by the diet business, or as I like to call it the 'hate your body industry'. I could have made a lot of money by partnering with these people, but I'd rather sleep at night.

I totally understand why you're sceptical, many people who have success with my system are - and many are pleasantly surprised.

I wish you the best of luck.

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 13:15:39

ThenAgain

Have you got any advice for people that have tried your gastric band hypnotherapy but didn't feel the effect - e.g. didn't feel like they had a band? I loved your first book and so wanted it to work but just didn't get the effect. Should I try it a few times?

I'm sorry this didn't work for you or hasn't worked yet. Some people find they need to use the trance many times - for example every day for two weeks - and then suddenly something clicks. Yes, you'll know you didn't have a band, but its your unconscious mind and your body that needs to be convinced, so it's producing more GLP1 or PYY (the hormones that signal satiety or fullness) or giving your brain the impression that it is.

You may find the new book and CD is helpful, or the app. I've spent a long time and an immense amount of effort making these two systems, and so I'm sorry to hear you haven't had the success you want. I really wish my system was 100% effective, nothing would make me happier.

Thanks so much. God bless.

BadRoly Fri 10-Jan-14 13:15:47

I have the ICMYT book and CD. I generally listen to the CD when I go to bed so often fall asleep as I'm listening to it. My question though is why it frequently seems to be followed then by vivid and often bad dreams?! After a few nights of this I tend to give up listening as I may be eating less but I'm also sleeping less!

PaulMcKenna Fri 10-Jan-14 13:16:38

Thank you everyone for your questions. They've been really helpful and they help me to understand more about what I do, and I hope you've found something useful in what I've said today. I hope you have success in all that you do.

Happy new year and may all your dearest wishes come true. Thanks everyone, and God bless from London.

ThenAgain Fri 10-Jan-14 13:19:26

Thank you!

Louloulouisa Fri 10-Jan-14 13:20:06

THANK YOU Paul :D

Solo Fri 10-Jan-14 13:22:49

Thank you Paul! <waves, blows xx's blush>

cls77 Fri 10-Jan-14 13:49:36

Thankyou so much Paul! Will download the App now smile

AliceMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 10-Jan-14 13:54:31

Thanks for all your questions in today's webchat with Paul McKenna. We have five copies of Paul's new book Freedom From Emotional Eating to give to Mumsnetters that took part. Congratulations to GinSoakedMisery, YesAnastasia, Solo, Temperate, and Whitershadeofpale who have all won a copy. We will pm you with details on how to claim yours.

TheDoctrineOf2014 Fri 10-Jan-14 14:02:09

Thanks, I am glad you have an app now, will look at that.

GinSoakedMisery Fri 10-Jan-14 14:08:29

Have just got back from work. Thanks for answering my question Paul.

Was just about to order your book, but wow I've won one instead! Thank you ever so much MN and Paul.

Thanks smile

Solo Fri 10-Jan-14 17:20:03

Thank you!!! <very excited> was it the xx's that did it?!! grin

Temperate Fri 10-Jan-14 19:32:55

Now there's no excuse not to fix it. Thanks for the book!

mohhum Sat 11-Jan-14 12:06:37

goatsaregood didn't you realise that he directed you to his partner's website and suggested that you took his course? I'm not impressed at all, I thought he genuinely wanted to help, but he's just a salesman.

MillyRules Sat 11-Jan-14 15:30:57

mohhum this way of eating genuinely works. Its mindful eating and I have been attempting to do it for twenty years. I managed it but when I joined PM thread on MN late 2012 it really helped me to give up diets forever. All PM suggests is that you only eat when you are truly genuinely hungry and are at that place when food tastes absolutely amazing upon your first bite because your body is requiring food. Then to consciously taste and savour every single mouthful because when you do this you then know exactly when you have had enough and are satisfied and you then stop. It might be a few mouthfuls or it might be a whole plate, depends upon your bodies requirements at that time. The best one of all though is to eat exactly what you want. So the opposite of diets. I and many many others have lost weight and maintained weight by eating this way and never dieted again. All diets can cause disordered eating. Eating whatever you want again changes your whole approach to food. At first some people eat too much because of the freedom from dieting but if they get proper support and listen to the hypnosis cds and re read the books then they eventually get to a point where they began to "GET" it . Re learning to eat like a naturally slim person takes effort and a lot of conscious thought each time you are hungry but eventually it becomes second nature.

I love his books and cds but to be fair you don't ever have to buy one at all. Just learn to eat when your genuinely hungry and stop when your genuinely full and ditch the diets.

BrandNewIggi Sat 11-Jan-14 16:26:27

I'd rather spend £12 on a book than (how much is it?) to attend weight watchers or slimming world. And then attend it again the next year when I've regained the weight.

Waitingforflo Sat 11-Jan-14 16:55:45

£6 for the book on Amazon and in supermarkets

goatsaregood Sat 11-Jan-14 16:56:56

I genuinely don't see what's wrong with someone who has written a book trying to sell copies of that book confused.

goatsaregood Sat 11-Jan-14 17:00:10

And now that I've had time to look at what he suggested, it has actually given me the push to look at lots of stuff - all of which I can access for free - that will hopefully help some of the people I work with. Hasn't cost me a penny so I have no problem with it at all.

I also think his method does help. I lost 16 lbs on it when the last book came out, and have kept that weight off. I'll try this one too as I'd quite like to lose a bit more and it's a method that makes sense. Nothing for me to feel aggrieved about or tricked into there as far as I can see.

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