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Caitlin Moran: live webchat, Thursday 13 September, 1-2pm

(456 Posts)
RachelMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 11-Sep-12 16:41:25

Much excitement at Mumsnet HQ this week as Caitlin Moran is joining us on Thursday lunchtime (1-2pm) for a live webchat and to talk us through her latest book, Moranthology.

How to be a Woman was one of the most talked about books on the boards last year, so we're all delighted to hear Moranthology brings more chat on a brilliant range of topics: Twitter, Obama, binge drinking, Amy Winehouse, 'The Big Society', Party Bags and Boris Johnson - Albino Shag-hound.  These are just a few of the subjects touched on and make us think she is our ideal guest.

Post your questions to Caitlin in advance or join her on Thursday at 1pm.

Nagoo Tue 11-Sep-12 16:43:36

ohhhhhh OOOOOoooohhhhhhhhhhh grin

<tries to think of question that makes self not look a fricking numpty>

Msinterpret Tue 11-Sep-12 16:48:17

Wahey! Well done MN smile

fufulina Tue 11-Sep-12 16:48:55

SCREAM!

Taffeta Tue 11-Sep-12 16:50:24

Oh WOW

I have a question:

Do you relate to people in the flesh as you do on the page? eg at the school gate, with clusters of mothers you may not know that well. Do you spout forth or nod and smile?

Loving your stuff, btw. <gush>

LadyEmmaHamilton Tue 11-Sep-12 17:12:31

Oh I LUFF Caitlin Moran!

<clears throat and stands up for fawning question a la Prime Minister's Question Time>

Caitlin, do you agree that your excellent book "How to be a woman" should be required reading for all girls aged 13 and older?

I have two teenage cousins and I can't help thinking that reading it would save them some of the heartache I endured.

<sneakily slips in second question> Can we go drinking together?

shrinkingnora Tue 11-Sep-12 17:25:34

Caitlin, you are amazing and funny and I am more than a little in love with you. I saw you talk at the Hay festival (and walked past you and nearly died of excitement. We followed you to tell you how fab you are but you managed to escape).

My question is:

If you could give your 8 year old self one bit of advice what would it be? Would you consider writing a guide to life for girls that age? My DD is 8 and is finding life hard...I would give her How to be a Woman to read but it I think it would scare her. And her language is quite foul enough already.

(I know that is two questions but it is kind of one in two parts)

Crumblemum Tue 11-Sep-12 21:36:06

A bit navel gazing - but are you a Mumsnetter? Someone once told me in hushed tones that you were a regular once upon a time? If so what do you think of it?

CountBapula Wed 12-Sep-12 07:49:07

Hi Caitlin. I'm a big fan of your writing and loved How To Be A Woman.

The only bit I wasn't convinced about was the chapter on Lady Gaga. Do you really think she can be classed as a feminist icon? I watch her videos and think, 'Oh, put some bloody clothes on, woman' - same as with Rihanna or any of those other pop tarts. I find it really sad the way female musicians feel they have to take their clothes off and act all sexy to sell records. What do you think?

Gigondas Wed 12-Sep-12 07:57:17

Big fan here too esp of celebwatch blush.

As a twitter follower, I admire your comments on various Internet shopping sites. But how do you manage to drag yourself away fit that in with writing a column?

ShiirleyKnott Wed 12-Sep-12 09:20:52

<casual>

Hi Caitlin.

I read How To Be A Woman while on Holiday last year and loved it. I am about to ask my son (15) to have a read as I feel that it would be really valuable for him as I can't seem to find anything else that is such good fun and easy to read on the subject of feminism.

My question is, have you encountered much of a backlash from How To Be A Woman?

I TOTALLY LOVE YOU BTW

Shit, blew my casual cover

CountBapula Wed 12-Sep-12 10:00:51

Oops, meant pop stars, not pop tarts blush

dinkystinky Wed 12-Sep-12 10:05:36

Caitlin - your columns make me chortle with laughter and remind me to keep doing my pelvic floor exercises. Who or what makes you laugh pant-wettingly hard?

lljkk Wed 12-Sep-12 11:31:32

I am interested in your story of being autonomously educated as a child, that you & your very many siblings all turned out "okay" from it. I mean, do you feel like you were all well prepared for adult life? How are you & they educating own children now, have any chosen to HE own children?

gonowkid Wed 12-Sep-12 12:29:01

Dear Caitlin, will you merry me?

So I just wanted to ask you for any advice you can give for the starting up writer. Any tips, clues, names, email addresses. etc. I know you started your career (wheey!) very early on and times had changed but as you're in the business you may know IT ALL.

gonowkid Wed 12-Sep-12 12:34:03

I'm also 11 weeks pregnant and worried as f* about money, stiches, tears and everything else. Will it be ok? Will you come give me hug and drink coffee with me? Poke me on Facebook?

70sLadygarden Wed 12-Sep-12 12:39:43

I saw you at the Cheltenham Literature Festival a year ago with Grace Dent and you said you would never appear on a panel show such as Mock the Week as they still such chauvinistic minefields. Have you changed your mind at all? Come on we need you to break down the barrier and you are the woman to do it!

70sLadygarden Wed 12-Sep-12 12:40:49

PS Am coming to see you again this year at Cheltenham! Let's all stand on chairs again!

ComradeJing Wed 12-Sep-12 12:48:58

Caitlin, I think you're brilliant and loved your column before it disappeared behind the paywall and your book.

I agree with others that your book should be required reading for all teens.

What would you say to accusations that How to Be a Woman is patriarchally approved feminism? More specifically your views on pornography and that there is nothing really wrong with it. I think in your book you said something along the lines of "it's just fucking." Does that not just ignore that many women in the industry have been abused or are being coerced? Or any of the other issues that feminists have with porn?

It's the one point I've read over and over again WRT How to Be a Woman... that many people enjoyed it but just couldn't see eye to eye with you regarding pornography which could be what leads people to say it is patriarchally approved feminism.

fotheringhay Wed 12-Sep-12 13:54:39

Hi Caitlin,
I think you're totally ace. Actually, no I don't. I KNOW it.
My question is a bit strange: As you're such a livewire, how do you relax? Do you sleep ok?
(I'm having trouble with that at the mo)
Thanks!

gazzalw Wed 12-Sep-12 14:03:43

Dear Caitlin

As someone like myself who was brought up in social housing, what do you think of this current idea to negate the shortage of social housing by building a 21st Century version of the prefab?

Thanks grin

TheBlackShiksa Wed 12-Sep-12 14:21:40

Hi Caitlin, what' s your favourite biscuit? Also where do you get hair done? smile

issimma Wed 12-Sep-12 14:30:44

What are you wearing? <in a NON-pervy way, despite being big, huge fan>

fuckityfuckfuckfuck Wed 12-Sep-12 14:38:21

Ooo yay!
LOVED the book and I gave a copy to my 18 yo, just-off-to-university sister and hope it'll stand her in good stead.
Caitlin, as the mother of young girls, what do you think are the most important things you can teach them?
Also <shallow>, that fab necklace you're wearing on the cover- where can I get me one of them? My friend adores it and I'd be forever in your debt...

NigellasGuest Wed 12-Sep-12 14:40:19

Hi Caitlin, hope you're well!

I would like to know if you think The Sun's Page 3 should be banned.
If so, why, and if not, why not?

Thanks! thanks

Miffytastic Wed 12-Sep-12 14:41:08

Love the book, I have given it as presents too, including to my v.ill friend who sat laughing out loud whilst having chemo.
I second the porn question, as that was the only contentious bit of the book for me, well that and liking Gaga but I feel less strongly about that point.

In HTBAW you mention likened running to dancing (I get this, and have been known to do ravey hands whilst running in the woods): my question is

do you still run and if so what is on your running playlist?

NinthWave Wed 12-Sep-12 14:56:37

Hello Caitlin,

I have a question about childcare in the early years. I noticed in your book that you didn't really make much reference to whether you used nurseries/nannies etc when your children were very young, and you were working; we discussed this in my book group and I felt that it would have been great to hear your views on childcare and feminism, and how there seems to be some pretty negative attitudes towards working women (mainly celebs) who use nannies etc.

So my question is - did you have a nanny/au pair/childminder etc when your girls were small? If not, how did you manage the balance with working from home? And what are your thoughts on the (false?) impression given in the media by a number of celeb women that it's a piece of piss to balance modelling/acting/whatevering with full-time childrearing?

Thank you in advance - I shall be working while you're doing your webchat (mine is in a nursery) but will sneak on if I can grin

NinthWave Wed 12-Sep-12 14:57:32

*my child is in a nursery, I mean! I'm not doing a webchat in one blush

thestringcheesemassacre Wed 12-Sep-12 15:52:46

Who is your favourite uk columnist? It's Grace Dent isn't it? Does she have a restraining order for you yet?

Pinkforever Wed 12-Sep-12 15:59:28

My quetion is-

Boris Johnstone-shag or die?

DavidaTheLobster Wed 12-Sep-12 16:15:20

Hi Caitlin

Huge fan! Where do you stand on fidelity within a relationship? Is it a deal-breaker (either or both ways)?

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Wed 12-Sep-12 16:16:46

Dear Caitlin.
So looking forward to the new book.
Rik Mayall once cupped my boob. And I loved it. Does this make me a) a terrible feminist or b) incrediby lucky?

PS - remember you from Naked City discussing your goth wardrobe. Red? I like it!! smile

squeaver Wed 12-Sep-12 16:19:12

Do you think print journalism has a future?

And - not a question - but I really admire The Times for employing you, India Knight, Janice Turner etc who are very obviously NOT Murdoch lapdogs (and, incidentally, all great feminists). I don't think there's nearly enough appreciation of that.

WilfSell Wed 12-Sep-12 16:24:30

Us old gimmers remember when you were <ahem> royalty a MN regular. Do you still, er, dabble? wink

vigglewiggle Wed 12-Sep-12 16:35:04

Just read "How To Be a Woman" and thoroughly enjoyed it. If you have a new book to plug, why don't you come to the Ilkley Literature Festival it is just down the road from me as good as Cheltenham and I would really like to hear you talk about your books.

IawnCont Wed 12-Sep-12 16:45:56

OMG official. I have never ever been so jealous of anyone in my life. Rik Mayall is sooooo sexy. (Sorry for hogging thread with weird taste in men.)

Caitlin, have you finished your crisp cracker yet?
And also... The pronounciation of Caitlin has been a subject of debate here on mumsnet. How do you say your name?

God, sorry, these were VERY boring questions. I love How To Be A Woman. And (obviously) I love your twitterings. I secretly really want to be best friends with you, Lauren Laverne and Grace Dent. And Lucy Mangan.

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Wed 12-Sep-12 16:48:15

Oh Iawn. You have no idea. I haven't washed it since (I have.)
He is so sexy! I so would. smile

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Wed 12-Sep-12 16:48:52

oh and don't bother being friends with lucy mangan. she hates vegetarians!

IawnCont Wed 12-Sep-12 17:00:30

grin at official with one dirty boob grin grin grin
I used to have a life size cardboard cut-out of him in my bedroom when I was a teenager blush

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Wed 12-Sep-12 17:16:59

Hurrah! A web chat worth looking at smile

I'm not sure I have a question, I've just come here to fawn over you.

I loved the R4 interview you had with Tim Minchin and the subsequent interview you did with Jennifer Saunders.

Have you done much radio and would you do more? You have an engaging voice that is easy on the ear and that draws you in - it's like listening to your friends having a gossip at the pub.

Ah, see. I did have a question after all!

HandyCock Wed 12-Sep-12 17:29:31

Do you think separating "Sports Personality of the Year " into men and women does female sporting personalities a disservice or do you think it's quite a sensible thing to do?

When DH called our DD his princess and I passed him a copy of your book irrelevant fawning

Badvoc Wed 12-Sep-12 17:38:29

Hello Caitlin.
Am a Huge fan and, frankly would be your house slave if asked, however...moving on.....
I was disappointed that in your book "how to be a woman" you deemed porn "fine".
I dont agree and neither did a lot of other MNers.
Do you still feel that way and why?

Badvoc Wed 12-Sep-12 17:38:54

Seriously.....I would.
smile

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Wed 12-Sep-12 17:39:18

Oh, and I should mention that you are entirely responsible for dh and I singing 'cheese on cheese', every time we reach for the Cathedral City. Even ds (4yo) sings it grin

mariathehack Wed 12-Sep-12 17:42:22

Hi Caitlin, just wanted to ask, who has been the biggest influence on your writing career so far?

Hi Caitlin.

My question is what are your views on trade unions? (I work for one) I personally think we do so much good and need a few more decent people to stick up for us!

defineme Wed 12-Sep-12 19:08:21

Hi Caitlin,
Thank you for the joy of a book that made me laugh out loud and made the 10 women in my book group try to discuss the word 'cunt' for 30 minutes without saying it oncegrin.

I have also given a copy of your book to my lovely 18yrold cousin who's off to university and needed a counterpoint to 'Fifty Shades of Grey'.

My question is What do you think of 'Fifty Shades of Grey' ?

Stitchthis Wed 12-Sep-12 19:21:42

If you were to be represented by just one article or piece you've written which one would it be? Personally I loved the gaga one. Marvellous.
<eyes hair do enviously> ok, and I want to know who does your hair. I asked for a mallen streak recently and I was the only one old enough to know what I was talking about.

marshmallowpies Wed 12-Sep-12 19:24:11

Another big fan here & I love being able to watch your banter on Twitter, it's like overhearing the most entertaining drunk last-orders pub conversations ever.

However...sometimes Twitter gets a bit pitchforky & lots of male journalists have written lately about whether trolls should be hounded, exposed or ignored. What do you think about it, especially if it's a woman being attacked by a troll, or the person doing the trolling is a woman?

(Seeing women hounding other women here and on Twitter makes me very uncomfortable).

BupcakesandCunting Wed 12-Sep-12 19:34:45

Caitlin, will you please be my best friend? I'll dump my current BF for you.

I grew up in the same area of Wolvo as you so that should cement it. I was even in the same year at school as one of your sisters for a time

<composes self>

My actual question though is this: You have said that your husband Pete is a massive feminist. There are factions on MN who would scoff at this. He has a penis. He cannot be a feminist. How would you argue against that?

xxx

BupcakesandCunting Wed 12-Sep-12 19:35:45

Great. I put kisses on the end of my post. I am officially a twunt. hmm

CeliaFate Wed 12-Sep-12 19:45:47

How do you think feminism will have progressed by the time your daughters are adult?

MrsCampbellBlack Wed 12-Sep-12 19:49:10

Oh Caitlin - [tries to be cool] - I love you and your book and loved your interview with Tim Minchin on r4 a couple of weeks back - was it the battle of the big hair.

Think my favourite quote of yours is 'leopard is a neutral' wink Love all the feminism stuff too obviously.

Am going to have to re-arrange tomorrow to be around for this now [excited]

Heebiejeebie Wed 12-Sep-12 20:08:21

Could you please tell us how it feels to have 'Moran week' in the Times? Has anyone else ever had a week? And shouldn't you be inviting everyone at the Bloomsbury Theatre tonight to the after party? Thank you.

snigger Wed 12-Sep-12 20:09:36

Hello Caitlin

<wibble>

Listened to your Teenage Diary segment on R4 and loved it, and wondered - do you still keep a diary? If so, do you still find yourself tempted to start with what you ate?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

What's your take on all the Olympic shenanigans eh?

Also your book is regularly gifted to my girlfriends (that term offends me.) So thank you for making it a bit of a no brainer.

My birthday present shopping list goes "Is she a girl? Does she have a brain? Catlin Moran book it is."

Tis easy peasy.

chosenone Wed 12-Sep-12 20:32:36

sooooo Caitlin please tell us about your stitches wink

BabeRuthless Wed 12-Sep-12 20:55:54

Hi Caitlin

I remember taping episodes of Naked City & watching them obsessively. I'm of a certain age where I used to wear doc martins, drink cider & dance to Nirvana so hence the following questions

Does Courtney Love ever get in touch? Even by means of rambling answer phone messages?

What do you think your 16 year old self would have made of Lady Gaga? Are there any current rock role models for girls out there?

Goonatic Wed 12-Sep-12 21:19:44

Hello Caitlin,
I buy all my friends copies of your book for their birthdays. It is brill and my copy is on it's fifth lending.

Question;
My DH and I have a famous people clause, he is allowed to shag Emma Bunton and I am allowed to shag Bryan Adams, Paul Walker and I have recently added Oscar Pistorius. Do you have one and who is on it? If not who would you put on it?

grin

FastidiaBlueberry Wed 12-Sep-12 21:54:56

Hi Caitlin, what's your view on the Assange fiasco?

BupcakesandCunting Wed 12-Sep-12 21:59:05

Goonatic, your DH just gets Bunton and you get a trio of hunks?! How is that fair?! shock

Goonatic Wed 12-Sep-12 22:01:30

Ha ha! I secretly updated mine and didn't tell him!!!! He is a goonatic!

MrsKwazii Wed 12-Sep-12 22:05:37

Hello Caitlin,

I thought you looked cheerfully bonkers in the Batman get-up in the The Times at the weekend - hope you got to keep it. Especially the cape. You could also pretend to be a olde time magician when the mood took you then.

You mentioned in the feature about your new book that you decided to take the non-sneery, less acerbic road to being a critic, and to have fun. Being a misery-guts is probably easier, but what you're doing looks like a lot more fun, especially as it means your byline pictures aren't of you looking all moody. Why aren't more people following your lead?

Haberdashery Wed 12-Sep-12 22:10:31

>> he is allowed to shag Emma Bunton

Jesus, seriously? Are you not a bit worried about his taste in women?

NorbertDentressangle Wed 12-Sep-12 22:11:10

So Caitlin, who would win in a fight between you and Hufty?

libertychick Wed 12-Sep-12 22:13:03

Hello Caitlin
Thanks for being a wild haired, clever, loud, lovely, opinionated, honest woman who has a bush and rocks a dress. You give others permission to be themselves and that is quite a gift.
xxxxxxxxxx

Goonatic Wed 12-Sep-12 22:15:04

OY haberdashery ! Bless him he hasnt thought to update it from circa 1995 so she was quite fit at the time. Am but scared to ask him to update it.

cocolepew Wed 12-Sep-12 22:29:42

Hi Caitlin, who do you think are good female role models for teens today?

cocolepew Wed 12-Sep-12 22:30:34

Did someone already ask that ?hmm

MmeLindor Wed 12-Sep-12 22:34:24

Hello Caitlin

There has been a lot of discussion recently about trolls on Twitter, and how celebrities deal with them.

Do you get a lot of abuse on Twitter, and if you do how do you deal with it?

(going by the atrocious fawning on this thread, you probably don't get any abuse)

<hard stare at the fluttering masses> Stop it. We have a reputation as hard assed vipers to maintain. FFS.

margerykemp Wed 12-Sep-12 22:35:35

Do you think you'll write a sequel to HTBAW?

I have just finished reading HTBAW thanks to loads of mentions of it on here. I know Caitlin will answer her own questions, but WRT porn being "fine" I do believe what CM actually said was that she what she wants from porn is to be able to watch people enjoying consensual sex with people they actually like and want to fuck, which of course is not what the porn industry does. Normal people, normal sex. Although forgive me if I'm wrong and have read it incorrectly.

I haven't got a question right now, but will think on it and return!

MrsKwazii Wed 12-Sep-12 23:22:09

<Flicks v's at MmeLindor in hard assed viper fashion. Restores balance to the universe> wink

wellwisher Wed 12-Sep-12 23:30:10

How To Be A Man?
How To Be An Old Woman?

wellwisher Wed 12-Sep-12 23:31:20

Er, those were title suggestions for HTBAW sequels, following margerykemp's post

<curses short attention span and slow typing speed>

NurseRatched Wed 12-Sep-12 23:31:21

How to be a woman: I loved the stories about your family. But it all went downhill with the pursuant lectures [imho]

BookFairy Wed 12-Sep-12 23:41:17

Hi Caitlin,

I love your columns and HTBAW smile

In my part of the country a lare proportion of females my age (mid to late 20s) would definitely not consider themselves to be feminists. Do you think this is a geography or generation issue?

thanks for CelebWatch as it is a beacon of hilarity in this world of fauny 'sleb magazines!

TanteRose Wed 12-Sep-12 23:45:14

wellwisher grin
The sequel in a couple of decade should def. be How To Totally Rock Being An Old Lady

Caitlin, is there anything at all that worries you about growing older?

TanteRose Wed 12-Sep-12 23:46:53

Btw, your new book will be downloaded onto my Kindle in about 15 mins.
Am very excited grin

FatFaced Wed 12-Sep-12 23:48:15

Caitlin: you said in your book something like, "Having children made me want to work harder/be more successful." (I'm paraphrasing.)

Why do you think that was/is?

horsebiscuit Thu 13-Sep-12 00:29:40

Hello Caitlin, thank you for coming on Mumsnet. I loved your book and especially the chapter on abortion, it was so bloody brilliant to see that in print, especially about the most depressing google search in the world. Thanks for that. I should also say that I love you as you once complimented DD2 at a bus stop, and she is a funny looking thing so you made my day. <ahem>

My question is: I'd love to see more ballsy feminist interesting women like you on TV, not just writing about it. So why don't we see you on shows like Question Time or similar? I know the editors will say that they are desperate for women but find it hard to think of any hmm or get them to say yes hmm hmm. I've always thought this is a crying shame even though I'd be fucking terrified to appear on a show like that.

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 08:05:55

She said that porn is " just some people fucking"
No. It isn't. Its a multi billion dollar industry that degrades everyone involved in it, men and women.
It has also resulted in pre pubescent girls wanting their pubic hair waxed off as soon as it appears as it is not seen as normal anymore to have pubic hair on a female body ( its ok for males though)
I also have a major issue with the use of the word "retard" (used twice in the book)
My son has sen and it angered and saddened me that someone of Caitlin's intelligence thinks its ok to use that term in print and that it got past the (hopefully) stringent editorial process intact.
I wonder of Caitlin regrets her choice of word?
I hope so....

Haberdashery Thu 13-Sep-12 09:26:14

Tee hee, Goonatic!

TunipTheVegemal Thu 13-Sep-12 09:40:03

Hello Caitlin. I enjoyed your book though I really strongly disagree with you about porn.

Your book left me very nosy curious about what your brothers and sisters ended up doing. Did they turn out unconventional living in teepees somewhere or are they all very normal with mortgages and cars and jobs in marketing?

xxEms147xx Thu 13-Sep-12 09:59:03

My nine year old daughter (and Radio 4 addict) Grace thinks Caitlin is amazing and wants to be home schooled just like Caitlin.

Does Caitlin have any advice on for a home schooled child?

Thanks xx

Tinymrscollings Thu 13-Sep-12 10:00:19

Hi Caitlin

My dearest friend believes that pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding and motherhood are demeaning, subjugating and make women slaves to the patriarchy (her words, holding my day-old son).

I have a 7 month old baby, my body is ruined, I haven't had any fun for months and as I type this I'm sitting in a darkened room humming twinkle twinkle so I take her point but I disagree with her completely - I just can't put into words why without sounding like Mrs Beeton.

What do you think?

Ta!

<3

knackeredmutha Thu 13-Sep-12 10:02:17

Would love to know what your favourite wine is. Lambrini not allowed.

Looking forward to reading Moranthology.

noidles Thu 13-Sep-12 10:05:06

Hello Caitlin! Thanks for coming.

I loved HTBAW. I am also one of these people that forces every woman I know to read it.

Loved your chapter on abortion. I remember reading an article when I was at university, which said that increasingly more and more people in their 30s are having abortions, but choose to keep it to themselves out of guilt. The overriding opinion in society is that if you have a stable job, a home and a relationship, you should keep your baby if your pregnant. So so many people choose to keep it to themselves. It was so brave of you to be so candid about your opinion - and I totally agree with you.

After reading about Todd Akin's awful opinions that legitimate rape victims cannot medically get pregnant I would LOVE to see you interview him - would be uncomfortable viewing though. What would you say to him?

aristocat Thu 13-Sep-12 10:07:17

Hello Caitlin, another Wolverhampton girl here smile my question is if you were not a journalist/writer/broadcaster what would you like to do?
Would it involve music?

Thank you.

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 10:11:14

Hi Caitlin- I read your last book and gave it to my teenager; it is one of the few things she read this year, so thanks for that.

My question is: how on earth do you get anything done while you are attached to your phone on Twitter? Is there a drug I should know about? grin

IShallPracticeMyCurtsey Thu 13-Sep-12 10:14:59

Hi Caitlin,

A young male writer of my aquaintance (shit-hot, very talented, very right-on, very going-places) recently remarked that he was somewhat 'behind' on his 'women writers' - that all of his favourite novels were by men, that it never really occured to him to read novels written by women, and did I have any recommendations?

I find that when people - no matter how talented - come out with statements like this, I can no longer take them as seriously as before and they become less intelligent in my eyes. Does this kind of thing also annoy you? What's the solution? I never even bothered to reply to the mail sad

petitfiloser Thu 13-Sep-12 10:34:05

Hi Caitlin, Love youuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!

I would just like to know, do you wish your column was free to everyone?

ILovePonyo Thu 13-Sep-12 10:44:44

Hi Caitlin <waves>

I wanted to ask what your family made of HTBAW? It felt at times a bit like reading someone's (hilarious) diary, so just wondered if your family had any comments on it.

(and I love you too grin)

champagnesupernova Thu 13-Sep-12 10:45:13

Hello
What do you make of folk fawning over you and over whom do you fawn?

BrightPlacesBoomBands Thu 13-Sep-12 10:46:10

Hi Caitlin. Massive congratulations on HTBAW. I thought it was both Important and Very Funny.

I'd like to know whether you have any thoughts on bringing up boys. I am in awe of everyone who has a daughter and is doing their best to bring her up to know that she is not a second-class citizen. But as the mother of a boy I often ask myself what I can do to give him the best chance of growing up sane and loving and respectful of himself and everyone else. (You don't have to spend long on the Relationships board here to see how horrifyingly often it's not the case.)

snapespeare Thu 13-Sep-12 10:49:56

hello Caitlyn

I wondered about your opinion regarding the female characters on Doctor Who. smile

Opinion seems to be a little divided - Arguably Moffats show-running has led to incredible, sassy, female characters (I so want to be River Song! Martha Jones was an actual Doctor (but there was the unfortunate mooning around unrequitedly)) If anything there's a bit of an overload of flirty fiesty, but then the doctor probably wouldn't travel with someone a bit more pedestrain...However, there is still a bit of 'hanging-around-waiting-for-the-doctor-to-save-you' whilst saying Doctor in a variety of expressions 'Doctor!' (angry!) 'Doctor! (pleading) 'Doctor! (alluring)...

Also - do you think there is ever a possibility of a female regenration and (of course) who would be the best actress for the role?

johnworf Thu 13-Sep-12 11:07:03

Hi Caitlin. If you could be Prime Minister for the day what policies would you introduce and which would you get rid of and why?

ElectricSoftParade Thu 13-Sep-12 11:09:38

Hello Caitlyn

Loved HTBAW and am looking forward to reading your new book.

I saw you in Brighton while you were promoting HTBAW and really enjoyed your talk. Will you been doing another tour with the new one?

You have the most excellent eyebrows and also signed my copy = bezzie friends forever grin. Actually I met a woman who there seeing you too and we have become brilliant friends. You bring people together <hearts and flowers>

GentleLentilWeaver Thu 13-Sep-12 11:16:39

Hello Caitlin. Loving your work. I'd love to ask, if you could go back in time just for the purpose of re-living a specific part of your life, is there anything you would have done differently with the beauty of hindsight? (e.g terrible teen fashion choices, relationship choices, whatever.) Fanks! smile

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 11:18:41

Hello Caitlin,

Enjoyed your book and please tell your sister (the long suffering one with the unfortunate birthday who fought loads) that I think she sounds marvellous.
What is your best tried and tested hangover cure?

StitchThis- I remember the Mallen Streak. <gimmer>

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 11:27:41

IShall I've come across the 'real novels are written by men, women are just fiddling round the edges' attitude too - ugh! Have they not heard of Margaret Atwood, Donna Tartt, Zadie Smith, etc etc...?

Sorry for hijacking CatMo thread. As you were.

IShallPracticeMyCurtsey Thu 13-Sep-12 11:45:20

<crawls under hijack tarpulin to converse with marshmallow>

Well, you see, I kind of don't even want to bother with all of that - that listing off of names of brilliant female writers. Why should I or anybody have to do that? Why engage with or validate that kind of stupidity? If somebody isn't intelligent enough to consider that art/entertainment exists that is created by the other 50% of the human race, well...Maybe they're not such a Great Writer after all. Maybe I just end up pitying them for all of the things they will never know -never even begin to guess - about life and what it means to be human.

But, oh, some days my blood pressure, my blood pressure...

eggsandham Thu 13-Sep-12 11:53:09

Hi Caitlin. LOVED your book. Caused me to laugh out loud in way too many public places though :-)

I have had so many of my friends tell me that they would love to be your best friend. So here's my question - does the relatively new found fame and recognition you've had since the book delight you, or does it begin to drag after a while? Obvs you're not Lady GaGa but I imagine it's changed your life in some ways and whilst you're not going to come on here and complain about all these people who now profess to love you, is there a part of you thinking "leave me alone, I'm not that great"?

Just to say EEEEEEeeeeeep it is T - 65 mins to Caitlin time!!!

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 11:59:52

IShall - yes, see what you mean about not reeling off lists of authors...but was thinking of those names partly in relation to scenarios where female authors are never even considered alongside men, e.g. the ongoing debate about the next Great American Novel - 'will it be by Jeffrey Eugenides or Jonathan Franzen?' Errr...why is Donna Tartt not on that list? Why is it always assumed the GAN will be by a man? She's a better novelist than either of them I think.

Or the similar discussions that go on about MA and the sci-fi genre 'can women write sci fi? yada yada yawn' - although I admit she doesn't like being pigeonholed as sci fi herself....but the assumption seems to be, the genre is for men & women are somewhere around the edges.

ReneandGeorgetteMagritte Thu 13-Sep-12 12:06:59

Hi Caitlin,

I have a question. Apart from the fact that you seem a great deal of fun, it is completely irrelevant to who you are and all you have done, but I thought I'd take a punt as I need to ask someone new and clever because no-one so far has come up with a satifactory answer-

My lovely group of friends is busily saving to go to Glastonbury festival next year (and stay in a bit of comfort), we don't have the chance get together much (or escape the children and drink with abandon) so my selfish question is-

Where do you recommend 5 girls go for £500 each if we don't get tickets?

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 12:09:35

Lol at all the girl crushes grin

I'm far too cool for that kind of thing.

I am absolutely of the opinion that HTBAW should be required reading for gels (and boys actually) of 12+ however would you consider something specifically aimed at teenagers/pre-teens?

When I was that age, we had Melanie in Just Seventeen, Cathy and Clare (although they were a bit sad), Paula Yeats (yes, really), our mothers' Cosmo...

Honest, open talk about sex and about standing up for yourself was there for us. I'm just not so sure that it is anymore. You would be fabulous at it.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 12:14:20

ps I am coming to see you in Bath next month. Please will you wave at me <runs>

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 12:15:47

I can't think of any suitably intellectual questions so I am just coming on here to gush smile

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 12:18:15

Hi Caitlin, loved the book. I now have Quite The Crush on your sister, as well as your husband. Are you doing a biog thing soon? (or is that what the new one is?)

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 12:19:38

also. how's your vagina?

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 12:24:04

Also, could you use your clout whilst at MNHQ to get them to ask Jilly Cooper in for a webchat too, please?

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 12:27:58

excellent point, buppy. it's just a shame georgette heyer's died.

IShallPracticeMyCurtsey Thu 13-Sep-12 12:37:40

Yes, marshmallow, I follow those debates too and they make me so weary, like an awful lot of lip service is paid (e.g. to the likes of Jennifer Egan in the GAN debate; it just feels like poster names are trotted out - 'we're not dinosaurs, see we approve of this one noval written by Lady XXX') and then everyone gives a sigh of relief 'Glad that's all sorted then!' and turns back to their Hemingway.

In terms of sci-fi/fantasy: It fascinates me that some male writers dedicate their lives to alternate universes and futures yet don't have the leap of imagination to consider what the average woman's life might look like from the inside. You kind of want to force them to spend two hours on Mumsnet every day in the hope that they'd get a clue.

I don't know. BLAH!

IShallPracticeMyCurtsey Thu 13-Sep-12 12:38:41

'noval'? How embarrassing

KlarkyKat Thu 13-Sep-12 12:39:46

Just want to muscle in on the action, still thinking of a question...

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 12:42:27

Don't worry, Curtsey. I put kisses at the end of my question. Now that's embarrassing. blush

mousebacon Thu 13-Sep-12 12:45:49

<marks place>

grin

FrustratedMod Thu 13-Sep-12 12:46:40

Dear Caitlin,

You're about the same age as me, so do you remember back in the nineties, pre-Britpop, when it was ok (?normal?) for girls to wear shapeless, long, pretty defiantly unsexy clothes ( sadly, I remember grandad shirts and those awful stripy drawstring trousers). Nowadays women's clothes are all fitted and short, and girls at Glastonbury (me included) wear a full face of makeup.

Is this a good or a bad thing, do you think? Do you feel liberated? As a 30-something mum I just don't know if I am enjoying having to look alluring and on-trend on the fucking school run. (Don't want to go back to grandad shirts tho)

WishICouldBeLikeDavidWicks Thu 13-Sep-12 12:49:39

Big fan.

My question is- how do you get on with your mother ? Were/are you a bit annoyed that you had so many brothers and sisters when your house size and family finances were very strained.

Also interested inprevious poster's question about your views on childcare. It's been my mental and financial barrier for not returning to work straight away.

Mucho lovo.x

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 13-Sep-12 12:51:04

So Caitlin is in the building and rifling through our biscuit tins as we speak. She'll be with you in a jiffy...

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 12:53:32

Hurrah!

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 12:54:37

<wonders what is in the MN biscuit tin>

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 12:54:37

<wine at the ready>

petitfiloser Thu 13-Sep-12 12:55:35

hob nobs??

SkaterGrrrrl Thu 13-Sep-12 12:55:56

Love your book, love you Twitter. </sucking uo>

We had a huge, very active discussion on MN a couple of days ago about banning page 3. What do you think of page 3?

Oh and please come and post on the MN Feminist boards any time smile

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 12:56:05


YO YO YO YOWSA YO I AM HERE! I have ADVENTED at Mumsnet. Actually I got here early and I've been caning their sandwiches. Avocado. Very posh.

I love you, Caitlin <screams, faints>

Has there been any negative reaction to 'How To Be A Woman'? If so, what form did it take and how did you deal with it?

P.S. I still love you.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 12:56:18

I'd be disgusted if there wasn't a custard cream involved.

Greedygirl Thu 13-Sep-12 12:56:37

Your comment about David Cameron looking like C3P0 made of ham makes me snigger on a daily basis. That is all.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 12:57:11

eggsandham

Hi Caitlin. LOVED your book. Caused me to laugh out loud in way too many public places though :-)

I have had so many of my friends tell me that they would love to be your best friend. So here's my question - does the relatively new found fame and recognition you've had since the book delight you, or does it begin to drag after a while? Obvs you're not Lady GaGa but I imagine it's changed your life in some ways and whilst you're not going to come on here and complain about all these people who now profess to love you, is there a part of you thinking "leave me alone, I'm not that great"?

HELLO!!! SCREAM! YOU'RE MY FIRST QUESTION! Well er I've thought about this a lot over the last year, and I came to the conclusion that it does not behoove a lady, when she has been handed a public platform and some goodwill, to go "NO I am SHY don't LOOK at me you can't LEARN anything from me - I am a merely a GOSSAMER GLASS BALLERINA just brushing my hair and thinking about clouds!" No - step up. Take the responsibility. Accept the promotion graciously, and say, "I will try to do my best, like noble Barack Obama. I can handle it." Anyway, what I'm essentially being offered is the post of "Boozy big sister doling out advice from the back of the bus whilst reading the Communist Manifesto and drinking Thunderbird", and that was the role I have played in real life since 1991, so, you know. I have practise. I can easily quack on about stuff whilst putting eyeliner on.

petitfiloser Thu 13-Sep-12 12:57:18

screams as well [then runs...]

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 12:57:20

She's here!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<thud>

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 12:57:53

Caitlin, I was really struck by what you said about women and food:

"... Overeating is the addiction of choice of carers, and that’s why it’s come to be regarded as the lowest-ranking of all the addictions. It’s still a way of fucking yourself up whilst still remaining fully functional, because you have to. Fat people aren’t indulging in the ‘luxury’ of their addiction making themselves useless, chaotic or a burden. Instead, they are slowly self-destructing in a way that doesn’t inconvenience anyone. And that’s why it’s so often a woman’s addiction of choice…"

How do you think we should view the diet industry?

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 12:58:04

Hi Caitlin
Apologies if this has already been asked, I don't have time to read all the messages so far but:

After reading your batman piece in the Times last weekend, I wonder whether you are considering, or ever have considered, entering politics?

I will also be there at Cheltenham Lit Festival - really looking forward to seeing/hearing you! Ps I love your book HTBAW, so many things just made me say YESSSS! Especially things about handbags and shoes. But I agree with someone else that the only chapter that didn't quite ring true was the Lady Gaga one - do you think you were a little star struck? (sorry that's a second question).

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 12:58:09

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt

<wonders what is in the MN biscuit tin>

There IS no biscuit tin here. They're eating RAW NUTS like GIRLY SWOTS.

LostInWales Thu 13-Sep-12 12:58:42

Afternoon Caitlin. Another one who loved your book.

The only day of the week I buy the paper version of the Times is Friday because I get such pleasure from the look of Celebrity Watch and enjoy reading it that way much more (usually with tears of laughter and snorting so I scare the dog). Do you find a difference in how articles feel in print rather than digitally.

Has anyone asked your favorite biscuit yet? (I know, I know, technically two questions)

ps, we would so be BFF if we met

SkaterGrrrrl Thu 13-Sep-12 12:59:05

Argh, didn't proof read before posting as am giving toddler lunch, I am literate, I promise! The shame...

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:00:02

Raw nuts? What pussies.

Hardcore sugar laden calorific treats are what's needed.

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 13-Sep-12 13:00:08

Caitlin - Who is your fave jilly character and why?

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:01:19

Ooh good question Mrs CB envy

Bristowlian Thu 13-Sep-12 13:01:59

I read your book and it made me feel very, very tired. I think I am probably far too old to appreciate you. I wish you'd write some calmer stuff about parenting because I can imagine you are a very loving and supportive mum to your girls and it would be lovely to see that side of you. Do you ever feel that you have created a literary version of yourself and that people expect you to be a certain way?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:02:24

noidles

Hello Caitlin! Thanks for coming.

I loved HTBAW. I am also one of these people that forces every woman I know to read it.

Loved your chapter on abortion. I remember reading an article when I was at university, which said that increasingly more and more people in their 30s are having abortions, but choose to keep it to themselves out of guilt. The overriding opinion in society is that if you have a stable job, a home and a relationship, you should keep your baby if your pregnant. So so many people choose to keep it to themselves. It was so brave of you to be so candid about your opinion - and I totally agree with you.

After reading about Todd Akin's awful opinions that legitimate rape victims cannot medically get pregnant I would LOVE to see you interview him - would be uncomfortable viewing though. What would you say to him?

The thing about abortion laws is that, if you were some right wing guy, you might very well think it would be okay to change them. After all, you NEVER hear women going on about their abortions. You'd think no-one normal was having them. This is why we have to normalise talking about it. You know - one in three women will have an abortion, but they'll never talk about it. As a consequence, access to abortion could easily disappear, or be curtailed, because it just looks like no-one's using those useful laws. When they were having that debate in the US, I wanted every woman in America who's had an abortion to go on strike for one day - just so America could see, in one dazzling moment, how common this is for women. it's not a marginal event. it's absolutely part of our society. America would have ground to a halt on that day. And it would have been incredibly apt and symbolic, because if you curtail women's access to abortion, their lives grind to a halt, too.

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:03:11

Oh yeah, Bof, that food addiction comment blew me away too. It is absolutely on the money.

HuwEdwards Thu 13-Sep-12 13:04:37

Thought as a book writer you'd be quicker at typing.

Get a wriggle on.

cm22v077 Thu 13-Sep-12 13:04:43

Just read your wikipedia article, what did you buy with those £250 worth of book vouchers in 1988? PLEASE ANSWER.

TunipTheVegemal Thu 13-Sep-12 13:04:46

me too BoF/Wilf

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:05:14

AitchTwoOhOneTwo

also. how's your vagina?

My vagina is quite troubled today. I went on a bicycle for the first time in two years over the weekend, and I've kind of CRUSHED it into a sad frown. Those vehicles need bigger seats. Something like a lovely armchair. My vagina is sad :-(

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:05:19

WhiteHeron

Hello Caitlin,

Enjoyed your book and please tell your sister (the long suffering one with the unfortunate birthday who fought loads) that I think she sounds marvellous.
What is your best tried and tested hangover cure?

StitchThis- I remember the Mallen Streak. <gimmer>

There is no cure for a hangover. You have to sit in the middle of all the white-our sweaty horror and anxiety, and just suck it up. Fly into the nervo, like a fighter pilot, and then sit in the middle of the flames, letting it burnish you a hardened bronze shell. I always seem to spend my hangovers in a really slutty 1970's black polyester petticoat I bought from a charity shop, looking like The Childcatcher, and lying weakly around in various states of repose, occassionally eating toast as if it's the bravest thing in the world that anyone's ever done, and I'm Gandhi.

CatPower Thu 13-Sep-12 13:05:29

Dear Caitlin,

When I grow up I want to be you.

One question - Echobelly or Sleeper?

cm22v077 Thu 13-Sep-12 13:05:58

don't just say books.

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:06:32

Huge fan

I had a similar childhood to yours but I was the fourth daughter so at least my knickers were from my sister not my mum and our tv treat was vinegar on toast not forked cheese.
It took me ages to get over the sense of not being quite good enough, not quite as bright and shiny as all my friends.
You never seem to have experienced that feeling of shame about poverty. Has it ever been an issue for you.

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:06:32

Caitlin, I loved your book. As someone mentioned above, I would love it if you would write a book aimed at preteen girls (without the swearing) to show them they don't have to conform and fit in with everyone else, life is so hard for girls of that age (and teenagers of course).

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:06:42

That bastard Gandhi? (You possibly had to be there. Hey, maybe you were!)

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 13-Sep-12 13:07:06

CaitlinMoran

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt

<wonders what is in the MN biscuit tin>

There IS no biscuit tin here. They're eating RAW NUTS like GIRLY SWOTS.

<Hides empty Krispy Kreme boxes from this morning under the desk>

noidles Thu 13-Sep-12 13:07:11

Thanks for answering my question, and BTW, I realise I used the wrong 'your' in my question. Embarrassing!!!! It was a typo, I'm not really a stupid. Honest!

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:07:23

Cmon, cmon, DO YOU still? You know, the thing...? THIS thing?

MN

We won't stalk you, promise. grin

TunipTheVegemal Thu 13-Sep-12 13:07:23

Are you sure that's your vagina, not your vulva?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:07:29

cm22v077

Just read your wikipedia article, what did you buy with those £250 worth of book vouchers in 1988? PLEASE ANSWER.

I worked a massive blag, and managed to get FIVE HUNDRED QUID'S WORTH in the end. It was a credit note that was simply a piece of paper with "£179 left", and I would sneakily alter it, time after time. I bought all of Maureen Lipman's autobiographies - they're really ace - and Terry Prachett and Capote and a LOT of stationery. I'll never forget the thrill of being able to spunk £30 on notebooks. It was my first intimation of how pleasant it would be to be a millionaire. Notebooks.

knackeredmutha Thu 13-Sep-12 13:08:18

I reckon she's nipped out for a fag.

TheOriginalSteamingNit Thu 13-Sep-12 13:08:38

I read the book too, nodded along to a lot of it and gave it to my 15 year old daughter, who also liked a lot of it too.

I wasn't convinced by your argument about what to call a vagina, though. You say vaginas are 'straight-out bad luck' and that you don't have one, preferring instead a lot of words which are either a bit unpleasant (cf. 'minge', with all its overtones of 'minging', 'minger' and the fact that my mother in law refers to 'a mingy bit of cake' to mean a small portion.... yuck) or childish (cf. 'foof'). It seems as though you've taken on without question the negative associations with the word vagina, and responded by refusing the word and its actual meaning, which I kind of think is a shame.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:08:44

JustineMumsnet

CaitlinMoran

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt

<wonders what is in the MN biscuit tin>

There IS no biscuit tin here. They're eating RAW NUTS like GIRLY SWOTS.

<Hides empty Krispy Kreme boxes from this morning under the desk>

I love how you couldn't be any more upset and offended if I'd come in here and said "Everyone in here is POLE DANCING." You said it almost pleadingly. "We had Krispy Kremes this morning."

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 13:09:17

Yes, a book for pre-teen girls would be marvellous. My eldest daughter is seven today (in fact, we are just about 10 minutes of exactly 7 years....) and I would love something to give to her in perhaps a couple of years.

wishes Thu 13-Sep-12 13:09:21

I don't think the campaign is about "banning" Page 3, it's about asking The Sun to stop it. I'd be interested to know if Caitlin has a view on whether Page Three has any place in a civilised, equal society.

LostInWales Thu 13-Sep-12 13:09:40

<sighs with joy at being on the same bit of computer space as Caitlin>

Pratchett, knew it, he has to be in there somewhere influencing the writing of all the greats.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:09:55

TheOriginalSteamingNit

I read the book too, nodded along to a lot of it and gave it to my 15 year old daughter, who also liked a lot of it too.

I wasn't convinced by your argument about what to call a vagina, though. You say vaginas are 'straight-out bad luck' and that you don't have one, preferring instead a lot of words which are either a bit unpleasant (cf. 'minge', with all its overtones of 'minging', 'minger' and the fact that my mother in law refers to 'a mingy bit of cake' to mean a small portion.... yuck) or childish (cf. 'foof'). It seems as though you've taken on without question the negative associations with the word vagina, and responded by refusing the word and its actual meaning, which I kind of think is a shame.

I think you've taken on without question an assumption of what I wouldn't do in order to make a couple of jokes. What I wouldn't do to make a couple of jokes is a list this small: "-"

flapperghasted Thu 13-Sep-12 13:10:30

I like the way you talk about Rihanna wearing a cardigan to prove that she is truly strong and I have already passed this on to my 11 year old girl and her bessie mate. They both rolled their eyes at me.

I also object, vociferously, to artists getting their baps out on MTV and I sound like my mum, denouncing their madness in kitting off when they could be equally entertaining in a mid thigh skirt and a nicely fitted tee shirt.

How the hell do I promote to my daughter (a) that I'm not a prude but (b) that getting your flesh out isn't the way to succeed? We've done the body hair talk, the fat/thin debate, the feminist implications of hair removal and the impact of porn on modern expectations...please...what do I do next to ensure she doesn't just become a sheep and conform to TOWIE standards just to attract some porn obsessed boy who treats her badly. And yes, I expect you to provide the answer to the universe. Surely that's your job now you're horribly famous and are on Mumsnet???

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 13:10:30

Do you regret using the world "retard" twice in your last book Caitlin?

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:10:55

I'm not sure that The Sun has any place in a civilised, equal society, especially after yesterday, but yes, answer that one! smile

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 13:11:40

Thanks for the answer! envy at 1970s slutty petticoat.

<never washes the keyboard again>

MrsKwazii Thu 13-Sep-12 13:11:48

Come to my office next time you're webchatting. The place is powered by Fox's teatime variety. I may even share the bourbon creams with you. Maybe.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:12:01

wishes

I don't think the campaign is about "banning" Page 3, it's about asking The Sun to stop it. I'd be interested to know if Caitlin has a view on whether Page Three has any place in a civilised, equal society.

I would begin my anti-Page 3 campaign by insisting, in the interests of equality, Page 3 run next to this VERY SPECIAL picture of the young Bruce Springsteen, every day: 24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9q6o8oE7d1qdxb7io1_500.jpg

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:00

<save as wallpaper>

champagnesupernova Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:01

You sound like a fellow paper fetishist lover - where do you buy nice notebooks/etc these days?

NigellasGuest Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:01

I asked about Page 3 too, BTW! wink

Piffpaffpoff Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:20

Best. Webchat. EVER! grin

TheOriginalSteamingNit Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:26

Thanks - I do see that, but in amongst a lot of awfully sensible stuff and good points, I did find the 'names for vaginas' bit a tad jarring.

My daughter gets irritated with me for 'always saying things are sexist', and the book was a good way for me to say 'look, this, this is what I mean! Except the stuff about calling it your minge!'

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:13:49

johnworf

Hi Caitlin. If you could be Prime Minister for the day what policies would you introduce and which would you get rid of and why?

HELLO! I would absolutely bring in employment quotas for women, because of this simple, handy to remember analogy, which is from the book so I've just been able to cut'n'paste it haha:

When women are in a minority in any situation, they feel as understandably odd and stressed as two pelicans in a camel enclosure. And the camels can’t help but look at the pelican beaks oddly, and go off and do “camel things” in the corner, whilst the pelicans feel awkward and alone, and go on a weird diet, out of self-loathing.

In this situation, you just need to wang half a dozen stupider pelicans into the enclosure, to keep the best pelicans company, and even out the numbers - so that both “being a pelican” and “being a camel” is totally normal in London Zoo’s New Pelican & Camel Experience.

The argument against quotas is that it would mean that a lot of stupid, ill qualified women would get jobs, an that wouldn't be "right." And it wouldn't be right. It is, however, totally normal. After all, in an office that’s 70% men, at least 20% of them are going to be wildly ill-qualified desk-meat, smashing at the keyboard with their faces, and making a total hash of it. Of course they are. That’s just statistics. People who are anti positive discrimination are ignoring the fact that we’ve been giving jobs to MILLIONS of stupid, unqualified people for millenia: men.
Please don’t misunderstand – I am not prejudiced against the stupid men. Or the stupid women, for that matter As we all know, any office – from Budgens in Crouch End to the White House – only needs three clever people to run it. Everyone else there is essentially just a background extra, to stop the important, capable people feeling lonely.

I would also try to change the working structure of this country by insisting that the pubs, libraries and banks that are being closed down were compulsory purchase ordered by the Government, and turned into home-working hubs, instead of yet another sodding boutique shop, betting shop or charity shop. Imagine if you and your partner could walk, with the kids, to a local hub, drop the kids off at the Hub Nursery, take your laptops to the Hub Office and work there, pick up the kids for a lunch in the Hub Cafe, work the afternoon, pick up a ready meal from the Hub Shop, and your dry cleaning from the Hub Luandry, then walk home. No commuting, no pollution, work/life balance, time with your kids, time with your partner, connection with your local community. Come on. I'm a genius. It's amazing.

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 13-Sep-12 13:14:01

CaitlinMoran

JustineMumsnet

CaitlinMoran

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt

<wonders what is in the MN biscuit tin>

There IS no biscuit tin here. They're eating RAW NUTS like GIRLY SWOTS.

<Hides empty Krispy Kreme boxes from this morning under the desk>

I love how you couldn't be any more upset and offended if I'd come in here and said "Everyone in here is POLE DANCING." You said it almost pleadingly. "We had Krispy Kremes this morning."

I blame that John Briffa!

Cor. Young Brucie was a bit of a fox, weren't he? And he didn't wear pants!

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:14:07

knackeredmutha

Would love to know what your favourite wine is. Lambrini not allowed.

Looking forward to reading Moranthology.

The wine that is on the table. That is my favourite wine. I am ENRAGED by Pinot Grigo, for some reason. I think maybe because my husband bought 40 bottles of it for £7.99 before Christmas, and it's now our house wine and I'm bored of it. SHALL I BE PONCY? I like Albarino and flinty whites from the Loire. I KNOW! I KNOW! YOU'D NEVER GUESS I'M FROM WOLVERHAMPTON!

wishes Thu 13-Sep-12 13:14:19

Thank you. I was kind of hoping for a serious answer. May I take it you have signed the petition? I know you have been invited to on Twitter.

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:14:21

I get the desire to get our dds to read the book.
I made my 19 year old son read it. if some attitudes are to be changed I figure it helps if we get our sons on board.

Write one for teenage boys!

(we have agreed never to discuss the masturbation sections)

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:15:01

<coming in late to the party>

good picture Caitlin.

Question for you. Do you really like ladygaga that much? Or was it a hot and fast affair?

MrsKwazii Thu 13-Sep-12 13:15:02

Didn't there used to be a 'page 7 hunk' many moons ago. They all looked like Nick the Dick from Bachelor Party IIRC. Just awful. If that was discontinued, surely page 3 should be as well.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:15:35

By the way, I hope you've ALL looked at that picture of Bruce by now. Observe his trousers. HOLY MOTHER OF JESUS BRUCE.
I post that picture on Twitter whenever people seem to be particularly "down." It's my "Keep Calm & Carry On." "Bruce's Trousers & Carry On."

TheOriginalSteamingNit Thu 13-Sep-12 13:15:44

Pag - yes - I gave it to dd with similar proviso!

ScarletBadgers Thu 13-Sep-12 13:16:56

I've only skimmed the thread so not sure if anyone has already asked this. Would you consider writing a book aimed at a younger audience? I love HTBAW and can't wait to pass it on to my girls but the oldest is only 6!

Soooo jealous of your hair by the way :-)

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:17:26

The girl who took the photo of Bruce (and little Bruce) was his girlfriend and she screeched at him to put his clothes BACK ON.

<boggles>

flapperghasted Thu 13-Sep-12 13:17:36

I wish there was a 'like' button for the picture of Bruce Springsteen...

NigellasGuest Thu 13-Sep-12 13:17:40

i wonder whether that pic of the young Bruce would make men feel as uncomfortable as page 3 makes women feel uncomfortable IYSWIM.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:17:42

Blimey, that Springsteen link is a bit special <dirty old woman emoticon>

snigger Thu 13-Sep-12 13:17:51

Sir does dress to the right...somewhat

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:18:32

culturemulcher

<coming in late to the party>

good picture Caitlin.

Question for you. Do you really like ladygaga that much? Or was it a hot and fast affair?

The thing with Gaga is, she's not trying to turn men on. Even Madonna, our Sacred Lady of Pop, was trying to make the boys horny. And that's right and good and what pop is for, and we all owe Madonna a massive thanks. THANKS FOR MAKING IT OKAY TO GET OFF WITH A BLACK CRYING JESUS, MADONNA. But Gaga's walking around in armadillo shoes and a meat beret, with plasters on her nipples, crying black paint. You know - any single guy who's trying to get one off the wrist to that, good luck.
I just look at her and think "You loopy brilliant driven buck-toothed bacon-wearing dude, awwwwwlright. Right ON."

NigellasGuest Thu 13-Sep-12 13:18:45

ps for anyone who hasnt clicked on the Bruce pic, it's Sringsteien not Forsyth

slalomsuki Thu 13-Sep-12 13:18:57

Nothing wrong with Wolverhampton!!!!

knackeredmutha Thu 13-Sep-12 13:18:58

Love that, Loire & Albarino! Are you sure you are from Wolverhampton?

I don't actually know who you are blush you're a writer obviously as this thread tells me that!

please explain in 5 words what else I should know before I Google

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:19:01

What is this picture of Bruce you're all talking about? Where ...,.????

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VenetiaLanyon Thu 13-Sep-12 13:19:30

Hello Caitlin, are you compelled to try to be fantastically entertaining in all social situations, every day of the week? Or is your being-amusingness restricted to writing, and you're actually rather shy / grumpy / tedious / all of the above in RL?

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:20:42

Ooh found it! Yes, I like that! shock

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:20:56

She answered my question!

<faints>

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:20:56

Bruce is old news, even in his horny youth. It's all about Pistorius these days mate.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:21:24

I can't see the Bruce photo because I'm at work sad

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:21:35

Flippityjig

You're most welcome wink

wishes Thu 13-Sep-12 13:21:36

Absolutely, nigellasguest! I'm not sure Caitlin is taking women's feelings about Page3 very seriously.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:21:57

Hmm. Still not really feeling the love for Gaga though.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:22:24

70sLadygarden

I saw you at the Cheltenham Literature Festival a year ago with Grace Dent and you said you would never appear on a panel show such as Mock the Week as they still such chauvinistic minefields. Have you changed your mind at all? Come on we need you to break down the barrier and you are the woman to do it!

I can't do everything. I'm so tired. Also, I'm a comedy seperatist. I think those men's panel shows have been made for boys - not maliciously. That's just who was there making comedy at the time - and girls don't fit in there. Why should we? it's like when we wear men's trousers. We go in and out at different points.
Women need to make something in a fresh, clean space, and for me, that's Twitter. All the funniest people I follow are women - the women got there a couple of weeks before the men and populated it. All that "Things in asterisks * runs into room * stuff - that was me and a load of girls doing it. We set the rules, and it works around our lives - we can do it from home, in no make up, rather than going all the way to the BBC to have foundation applied for an hour. I can be telling a joke about Simon Cowell's £8 Mr Topper haircut to 280,000 people whilst making the kids' tea. It's so CONVENIENT.
Also, I have sweating issues. I can't appear under studio lights.

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:22:29

My dad bought me Chronicles of Narmo when I was a teenager. It just made me feel inadequate for not being a child novelist prodigy like Caitlin.

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 13:22:39

<<ponders whether Caitlin Moran is asking herself questions using her MN name>>

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:23:51

Still LOVED HTBAW though grin

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:24:01

YouveCatToBeKittenMe

I don't actually know who you are blush you're a writer obviously as this thread tells me that!

please explain in 5 words what else I should know before I Google

I genuinely wouldn't bother, dude. I'll be out of here in half an hour and you can pretend it was ALL A BAD DREAM.
Or, actually, pretend I'm David Cameron. Yeah. Look - I, David Cameron, am saying "Yes I AM a big div. I have got it all wrong." NOW GO TELL YOUR FRIENDS WHAT YOU SAW.

petitfiloser Thu 13-Sep-12 13:24:25

Hi Caitlin,
My first single was, 'The Safety Dance ' by 'Men without hats', beat that ...

PiggeryJokery Thu 13-Sep-12 13:24:44

Hello Caitlin!

I've just got here and haven't had a chance to read the Qs above, apologies if this has been asked already.

You didn't run, and now you do run and seem to love it. Please could you tell how you motivated yourself to get through the early days of terrible red-faced out-of-breath after 200 metres attempts to the point where it is enjoyable.

I would like to get past the first stages but fail miserably each time I haul my sagging 37 year old body out onto the streets and console myself with cake most times too

Many thanks

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:24:49

God, we soooo need an all female panel show, with Caitlin, Susan Calman, Sue Perkins, Shappi Korsandi and Sarah Milligan. Any other suggestions? Hosted by Sandi Tosvig of course!

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:25:17

Are you and MNer, Caitlin? or has that already been argued over sorted out upthead?

princesschick Thu 13-Sep-12 13:25:45

I have a sly question for you. I consider myself a bit of a feminist but I still go for the old Brazilian once a month... my DH likes it (and thing is... so do I). Is that an automatic red card crime in the real feminists gang? Do you have to have a huge muff piece to be a feminist? I thought it was more about having choices and being equal.

Oh and by the way, my husband immac's his ball bag. So I feel it evens out somewhat in our household...

Listmaker Thu 13-Sep-12 13:25:57

My dh and I loved your book - my book club didn't get it so much but they are quite straight-laced!

I also love your Saturday Times TV reviews - my dh and I laughed and laughed at the bit about the squirrel with the large nuts on GBBO.

No question - just wanted to tell you that really - thanks for brightening our days!

slatternlymother Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:01

Oooooh good question piggery

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:03

DillyTante, what a fab idea! That would be an amazing show .....

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:11

DillyTante

My dad bought me Chronicles of Narmo when I was a teenager. It just made me feel inadequate for not being a child novelist prodigy like Caitlin.

Comfort yourself that, whilst you weren't writing a novel, you probably WERE doing things like "having friends" and "learning to socialise without alcohol." It's all swings and roundabouts. Also, do you know how much I got for writing that book? That took two years? £1300. I KNOW. That's when I decided to "branch out" into journalism. It's far more time-effective, wage-wise.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:11

I'd watch that Dilly

Anyone know if Caitlin's tweeting about this at the same time?

namechangeme Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:34

Holy Rabbits!! That Bruce picture <hyperventilates>

lovelychops Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:53

Hi Caitlin,

I don't really have anything useful to say, except I think you're brilliant.
I'm proud to also come from Wolverhampton, I met one of your sisters at
a gig at the Molineux club once.

You rule.

TheOriginalSteamingNit Thu 13-Sep-12 13:26:58

Princess - no, Caitlin says keep it tidy and neat in the book!

UnChartered Thu 13-Sep-12 13:27:00

can we not have Sarah Milican..i'm sick of her moaning about the size of her tits

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:27:17

That was my question culturemulcher but she is steadfastly not answering for fear we all swoon at her feet and follow her round like lovesick first years with the school prefect.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:27:18

How about sanitary towels under the pits for the sweating problem?

Actually, no. Stay off of the tv. Often when entertaining people are on the tv they are then on EVERYTHING, and you hear the same stories over and over and they're not funny anymore.

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:27:47

Do you have RSI from tweeting? I imagine it's very hard on the thumbs after a while.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:28:12

Oh God, not Toksvig.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:28:18

petitfiloser

Hi Caitlin, Love youuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!

I would just like to know, do you wish your column was free to everyone?

I'm pro paywall, man. I'm pro the Times having a paywall. I'm pro paying for things. When people starting downloading music for free, the music industry shrank 40% between 1999 and now. The deals aren't around for working class kids to form bands, and tour. Likewise, you put all the newspapers and magazines online for free, and circulations plummeted, and now all these young wannabe journalists are being employed as unpaid interns, if at all.
I like arts and media. They're places working class kids can catch a break. I don't like how we pay for everything else on the internet - Topshop haven't made cardigans free! Halfords will still charge you for that exhaust! - but it was just arts and media that were suddenly free.

CaurnieBred Thu 13-Sep-12 13:28:29

Loved your interview of Jennifer Saunders on Radio 4 the other week; just brilliant.

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:28:48

Your husband immacs his bollocks?

This is my first webchat. Is it usually filled with weird sac related information and Bruce penis shots?

When is the next one ?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:29:20

princesschick

I have a sly question for you. I consider myself a bit of a feminist but I still go for the old Brazilian once a month... my DH likes it (and thing is... so do I). Is that an automatic red card crime in the real feminists gang? Do you have to have a huge muff piece to be a feminist? I thought it was more about having choices and being equal.

Oh and by the way, my husband immac's his ball bag. So I feel it evens out somewhat in our household...

Oh I'm wholly pro you waxing your moof - and, indeed, your HEAD - if you want to and can be arsed and have the time. I'm all for "freedom of minge." Ladies - your pants, your rules. Go for it! God speed! W00t!
I was just arguing for a bit more VARIETY in the pants. I'd just like to see some lush, bouffy fur escaping from some chick in a bikini on MTV once in a while. I LIKE how it looks. I'm a fan of the aesthetic. I LIKE HAIR.
I also note having a massive bush makes my thighs look thinner by comparison, so OBVIOUSLY that's a bonus too. But you may find things are different for you. It's just a serving suggestion. the contents of the packet may settle, in transit.

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 13:29:36

No - Mumsnet is re-tweeting some of it but I think she's got her hands full with three billion questions!

Listmaker Thu 13-Sep-12 13:29:39

Great idea Dilly but not Sarah Milligan please - she's so annoying. But Sue Perkins big yes! And Caitlin of course [arse-lick emoticon]........

Perledelait Thu 13-Sep-12 13:29:45

It so wasn't you frowns at screen

UnChartered Thu 13-Sep-12 13:30:09

Claire Balding then Buppers?

and Bjork

I was eating a pork pie when I read the bit about immacing bollocks. I'm not now.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:30:23

lovelychops

Hi Caitlin,

I don't really have anything useful to say, except I think you're brilliant.
I'm proud to also come from Wolverhampton, I met one of your sisters at
a gig at the Molineux club once.

You rule.

Was she being sick into a pint glass? As a family, one of our great skills was being able to vomit exactly a pint's worth of sick into a pint glass, to save having to go to the toilet. We were very proud of this trick.

edam Thu 13-Sep-12 13:30:42

Too right re. free content. Wish someone clever could come up with a way of doing it that doesn't involve paywalls - via Google or Amazon or someone paying for content, maybe. <hollow laugh>

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 13:30:47

Come on people!
HTBAW was great but what about the "retard" comments?
What about saying porn is "fine"?

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:30:58

If I had bollocks I would Immac them all the livelong day, just because I could.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:31:36

A big Balding YES!

UnChartered Thu 13-Sep-12 13:31:40

ooohhhh my sister can do that too! hurl into a pint glass

and so can her DD..despite only being 9mths old at the time, she did it!

<preens at being exactly like CM>

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:31:44

I do actually pay <fawning alert> good solid money to Murdochs JUST because you write for that bloody rag, Caitlin. I said I wouldn't stalk. I must not stalk. I must not stalk.

Anyhoo, on women's comedy, Millican does talk about her tits the whole time but she's funny because she's utterly fearless. Few other women are in comedy - they kind of hold back. I'm sure I have picked this up from summat you've written actually...

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:31:44

culturemulcher

Are you and MNer, Caitlin? or has that already been argued over sorted out upthead?

I used to, babe, when I was at home with two kids under four. I caned all these boards. Then Twitter was invented and there were more boys there and I went to flirt with them THERE THAT'S THE TRUTH HAPPY NOW?

DiaryofaSleepDeprivedMum Thu 13-Sep-12 13:32:07

I too am from the Midlands and loved "How to be a Woman" for it's refreshing approach to feminism, but also for reminding me of growing up in the same area at around the same time. I too was partial to a cheese lollipop. Do you by any chance remember Ovaltine chocolate? Please, you are my last hope!

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:32:17

Lucy Mangan?

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:32:34

She DIDN'T say porn is fine.

(sorry)

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:33:09

Why don't we ask her? She's here, you know.

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:33:18

But regrowth would mean bollocks with a buzz cut, like teeny tiny little skinheads.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:33:37

grin

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:33:48

Badvoc

Come on people!
HTBAW was great but what about the "retard" comments?
What about saying porn is "fine"?

"Retard" was a quote from my diaries when I was thirteen, and as soon as we realised how it looked, and how the context wasn't explained, it was taken out of all subsequent issues, and a massive apology issued. It's not a word I use now. It was a word I used when I was thirteen. I'm sorry.

Chandon Thu 13-Sep-12 13:34:10

Did you vote in the last election?

were you happy with the outcome wink

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:34:15

I think you need to stop thinking about the immac'd bollocks Pag grin

Prickly bollocks would cause chaffage, surely? <imagines men up and down the country wincing as they walk>

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:04

My Immac-ed bollocks would look like Buster Bloodvessel.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:12

CaitlinMoran

Badvoc

Come on people!
HTBAW was great but what about the "retard" comments?
What about saying porn is "fine"?

"Retard" was a quote from my diaries when I was thirteen, and as soon as we realised how it looked, and how the context wasn't explained, it was taken out of all subsequent issues, and a massive apology issued. It's not a word I use now. It was a word I used when I was thirteen. I'm sorry.

And porn IS fine. it's just some people, having sex. How is that bad? the INDUSTRY might be horrible - the prevalent AESTHETIC might be vile - but the essential idea of looking at some people having some lovely smashing sex sex isn't, logically, bad. It's not hurtful to anyone, if it's great lovely sex that everyone's having a totally pleasant time during.

BCBG Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:33

I'm 51 blush and writing my first book while doing a creative writing MA and to do this I've had to murder my sodding husband, kids, four dogs and three hens change my priorities a tad. Please tell me it's never too late to become a writer? [I know, that's not so much a question as a shameless can I lean on your shoulder a moment grin ]

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:36

Yes. I am focusing on the wrong thing. Sorry.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:44

I thought that she said (IIRC) that the base concept of porn was fine (i.e it's just two people boffing), wasn't all that keen on the industry/the way female performers are treated and was lobbying for some kind of free-range porn.

IIRC. I read HTBAW ona sun lounger in Corfu, tanked up on Mythos.

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:35:58

Caitlin, are you bored of having to explain and apologise about the 'retard' thing? I would be.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:36:12

When you take the hair off apparantly they stick - so my husband told me.

I'm talking about bollocks btw.

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 13:36:37

Ahem. Porn is"just some people fucking"
Apparently.
Thank you for the apology.
Although my son who has sen and is only 9 and would never use that term so not sure your age at the time is a valid excuse.

MinnieBar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:36:38

Who is your favourite Jilly Cooper character/ which is your favourite book?

FoofyShmooffer Thu 13-Sep-12 13:37:00

grin grin Pag. Thankyou. . Thankyou for that giant laugh.

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:37:01

It's not hurtful to anyone, if it's great lovely sex that everyone's having a totally pleasant time during.

Oh God. I can feel the sanctimonious comments rage building.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:37:21

WilfSell

I do actually pay <fawning alert> good solid money to Murdochs JUST because you write for that bloody rag, Caitlin. I said I wouldn't stalk. I must not stalk. I must not stalk.

Anyhoo, on women's comedy, Millican does talk about her tits the whole time but she's funny because she's utterly fearless. Few other women are in comedy - they kind of hold back. I'm sure I have picked this up from summat you've written actually...

I LOVE Sarah Millican. She's coming to my gig/launch thing tonight. She's truthful and comes from the same place as me - "Let's all just get on, let's not waste time with bullshit, let's be comfortable, let's have a snack and calm down." She's just lovely, and a totemic person to have out there, with her own show, in a cardigan, winning awards. Seeing her out there makes a nice pleasant background sound in ladies' heads. "She can do it - she's okay. I now feel better about myself."

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:38:03

BupcakesandCunting

I thought that she said (IIRC) that the base concept of porn was fine (i.e it's just two people boffing), wasn't all that keen on the industry/the way female performers are treated and was lobbying for some kind of free-range porn.

IIRC. I read HTBAW ona sun lounger in Corfu, tanked up on Mythos.

THAT'S HOW I WROTE IT!!!!!

A bit like smooshing your face against a window, MoveIt? Smeary.

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 13:38:36

hey catlin.
what band was that arsehole boyfriend in when you stoke the maracas???

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:38:49

What was that noise? Oh, it was Buppers gaysploding because Caitlin spoke to her...

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:39:01

Can we come?

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:39:11

Retard was widely used in the 80s. It was. We know better now.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:40:17

We'll be good. We'll stand at the back and laugh in all the right places.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:40:25

IS NO-ONE GOING TO ASK ME WHAT MY FAVOURITE BISCUIT IS? I'VE PREPARED THIS ONE.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:40:25

Shut your blowhole Tobes, before I shut it for you.

<skips off happily>

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:40:48

Someone indulge her, please.

RosemarySalt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:40:52

Hi Caitlin, am a big fan and loved HTBAW. Also envied you so horribly during my teenage years for having been the child prodigy novelist I wanted to be that I had to avoid everything you wrote for fear I'd explode with jealousy. Sorry!

Anyway I've now got over my need to be a novelist (by tring to write 3 books and not being able to finish one) and am embracing other talents and interests. Have you had any dreams that you had to let go of,or big disappointments about who you are vs who you wanted to be?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:05

OfficialFlyingSquirrel

hey catlin.
what band was that arsehole boyfriend in when you stoke the maracas???

A band of losers, dude. Like Band of Brothers, but with losers instead of Damian Green looking HAWT in a cap.

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:05

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE BISCUIT?

(I'm going with the sadly-defunct Trio)

snigger Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:08

Has anyone else begun to spontaneously hum "It was acceptable in the '80's" ?

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:16

What is your favourite biscuit? grin

whimsy Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:36

Caitlin what's your favourite biscuit?

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:42

I'm betting on an Orange Club.

Hey Caitlin, do you fancy coming to talk to Malago WI? We'd love to have you and would make your very favourite cake in honour of the occasion, and the fact you're our dream speaker

RosemarySalt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:41:56

PS <whispers> go on then, what's your favourite biscuit?

Tell me Caitlin...what is your favourite biscuit ? biscuit

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:09

menswear? smile

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:10

What IS your favourite biscuit? Don't keep us waiting ...

TimeForMyOwnDSorDD Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:14

Hi Caitlin, I'm a big fan of "How to be a Woman" and passed it round all my friends. Since I don't have a witty/intelligent question, I'll be the one to ask about your biscuit..

snigger Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:22

My pound's on Gold bar

TimeForMyOwnDSorDD Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:41

Major cross post there - so yes do tell!

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:46

TobyLerone

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE BISCUIT?

(I'm going with the sadly-defunct Trio)

THANK YOU THANK GOD I COULDN'T KEEP IT IN ANY MORE. I like the new 30 calorie digestive biscuits from Waitrose my husband has discovered - he's in charge of all the shopping in our house - eaten with a HUGE SLICE of Cheddar. I sure you can see what a sensible and well-thought-out meal this is.

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:55

Oreos

Would you ever consider becoming an MP? Aside from merely voting (and adopting a more tolerant and less judgy attitude towards hairy minges and porn and other stuff) what do you think us feminists should be doing to change the status quo?

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:55

It must be Wagon Wheels!

Chocolate hob nob, fo sho.

LostInWales Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:55

I asked ages ago what your favourite biscuit was <sulks> like, like before 1pm. Humph.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:57

Ha ha, like those sticky things you throw at a wall and then watch slowly make their way down.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:42:59

Oh Christ, not Menswear. sad

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 13:43:26

Have you ever actually seen any porn like that Caitlin?
I haven't.
And wrt the retard comment I also think its pretty sad that it got thought the whole editorial process without being taken out.
I am sorry if some people think its tiresome or boring to point out disablist words and phrases.
Actually I'm really not! smile

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 13:43:27

It wasn't Ned's Atomic Dustbin was it?

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:43:31

Digestives with cheddar, good choice.

MinnieBar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:43:49

<ahem> Did you mean Damien Lewis?

<runs>

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:01

TheBlackShiksa asked the biscuit question ages ago.

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:04

We've asked you already, loads. But it was way up there

That's what twitter does to your attention span, see?

Wrongbow Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:14

Poor TheBlackShiksa asked the biscuit question yesterday!

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:14

"Has anyone else begun to spontaneously hum "It was acceptable in the '80's" ?"

I totally was!!!

champagnesupernova Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:28

Please answer my question
thanks

Calvin Harris?

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:49

Digestives with jam and cream cheese. better.

toysoldiers Thu 13-Sep-12 13:44:58

There was a veritable shriek when I realised we had the same wedding venue!

anyway, do you think your daughters will find life as a woman easier?

I think we are the generation who were promised that we could have it all and have ended up just being very tired. I hope that men will up their game as the years go on to make it more culturally acceptable to share parenting (part time working, picking them up when they're ill, school plays etc) and women's careers won't get such a shafting.

But then I look at the princess parties and the porn, and the glittery shoes and silly nails, and just get depressed.

and the fake tans and silly eyebrows - when I spent my early 20s in the pub with a boy's haircut and a stripy t shirt.

I have boys - so I'm doing my best to teach them proper and what not, but I worry.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:45:10

RosemarySalt

Hi Caitlin, am a big fan and loved HTBAW. Also envied you so horribly during my teenage years for having been the child prodigy novelist I wanted to be that I had to avoid everything you wrote for fear I'd explode with jealousy. Sorry!

Anyway I've now got over my need to be a novelist (by tring to write 3 books and not being able to finish one) and am embracing other talents and interests. Have you had any dreams that you had to let go of,or big disappointments about who you are vs who you wanted to be?

I genuinely thought I'd be Ben Elton's girlfriend. I thought that quite strongly when I was 13. Then at 15, I was pretty convinced I'd be David Baddiel's girlfriend. I suspect you are starting to note a certain taste in men. I'm still kind of surprised I'm married to neither, really. I mean, I drew pictures of us together and everything. Although they weren't as moving as the picture I drew of me and violinist Nigel Kennedy GETTING MARRIED UNDER A TREE. I posted those pictures recently on Twitter and someone forwarded them to him. THANKS, THE INTENET :-/

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:45:27

It wouldn't be Ned's because Caitlin said "Neds aren't a band who are particularly sensitive or intelligent. They're Jonn and four other ugly whining c***s who wouldn't know a razor, hairbrush or cohesive argument, even if it was wrapped up with string and shoved up their arses"

grin

I am friends with one of the Neds and it still cuts him to this day that she said that. grin

BobbiFleckman Thu 13-Sep-12 13:45:35

Caitlin, are there any good stories that you know which involve tomato pips and 50p pieces? I'd sure love to hear one.

Badvoc Thu 13-Sep-12 13:45:36

Yes it was Damien Lewis.....swoon....

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:45:47

"It wasn't Ned's Atomic Dustbin was it? "

Oooh did you go out with one of them? I know one of them now.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:46:12

MinnieBar

<ahem> Did you mean Damien Lewis?

<runs>

Shit. yes. I meant Damian Lewis. Who's Damian Green? Is he hot? pervs him anyway

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:09

BobbiFleckman

Caitlin, are there any good stories that you know which involve tomato pips and 50p pieces? I'd sure love to hear one.

You are an evil friend in disguise trolling me for my story about having sex with a certain pop star, which I CERTAINLY WILL NOT SHARE HERE UNTIL I'VE HAD A DRINK.

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:14

Damian Green used to be my MP. Now an MEP (I think). Absolutely NOT HOT.

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:14

Any plans to write another book, a sequel?

MinnieBar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:15
JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:26

Menswe@r Bups. You forgot the '@'

I knew a girl who got off with one of them. He wasn't very nice apparently. I liked the one who looked a bit like Richard Beckinsale. They were dire though.

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:27

"It wouldn't be Ned's because Caitlin said "Neds aren't a band who are particularly sensitive or intelligent. They're Jonn and four other ugly whining c***s who wouldn't know a razor, hairbrush or cohesive argument, even if it was wrapped up with string and shoved up their arses"

grin

I am friends with one of the Neds and it still cuts him to this day that she said that."

Oooh I'm wondering which one because I know one of them too, and he is lovely, and v intelligent as a grown up.

I thought we started all the '* runs into room *' type stuff back on Popbitch?

Hmm?

lovelychops Thu 13-Sep-12 13:47:46

This thread has made me smile, Caitlin responded to my non question. Crave a Trio and Gold biscuit. And, wonder about the logistics of men Immac-ing their balls.
I'd call that a productive afternoon. I'm off for a lie down.

TimeForMyOwnDSorDD Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:08

I've got another one Caitlin, if no one's asked already - how do you keep your hair looking so fabulous?

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:16

tomato pips and 50p pieces? The mind boggles. Pour some wine down her throat and make her talk.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:18
CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:18

BupcakesandCunting

It wouldn't be Ned's because Caitlin said "Neds aren't a band who are particularly sensitive or intelligent. They're Jonn and four other ugly whining c***s who wouldn't know a razor, hairbrush or cohesive argument, even if it was wrapped up with string and shoved up their arses"

grin

I am friends with one of the Neds and it still cuts him to this day that she said that. grin

The entire introduction to "Moranthology" is a 4000 word apology about that review. Seriously. It changed my life. It made me realise I just want to be nice. PLEASE APOLOGISE TO HIM FOR ME.

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:19

For the love of god have a drink then please!
or two.

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:48:35

Shite. Turns out he's still my MP. I really ought to pay attention.

Damian Green is an MP....I've tweeted you a pic of him....and er...no. Not hot. Well, he's young Bruce Springsteen that's for sure !

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 13:49:17

FGS Give her a biscuit and bourbon. I need to know about the tomato pips and 50p.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:50:06

TimeForMyOwnDSorDD

I've got another one Caitlin, if no one's asked already - how do you keep your hair looking so fabulous?

SCREAM MY DREAM QUESTION. My treaty luxury is Aveda hair stuff, because it smells of mid-range joss-sticks, and then I SPRAY HALF A CAN OF DRY SHAMPOO INTO IT and back comb it until the cab arrives. Seal the whole thing with a minute-long squirt of Elnett and job's a goodun.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:50:13

So we're all invited tonight, then?

<stuck record emoticon>

I thought it was popbitch that started it too.

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:50:13

Is Olivia there? She's the one with gin in her desk.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:50:21

Will you be doing anymore radio Caitlin?

he's *NOT a young Bruce Springsteen !!!

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:50:37

Damian Green MP. The first man ever linked to on MN who has not made me go HUBBA HUBBA.

DillyTante, I wonder which one too! The one I know is a great guy!

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:51:51

Oh, and please answer the question about running, that was a good question.

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:51:57

Oh radio, yes! I LOVED the teenage diaries programme.

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:52:09

This IS the best webchat ever (well, maybe not as good as Sherererezerearde) not just because of Caitlin, but because it's got ace MNetters and great stories! And only one post on her new book so far even though she is supposed to be publicising it. Refreshing change not to have all the answers start "well, in the book I say..."

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:52:29

Justine has just shown me a picture of Damian Green MP with an evil grin on her face. I can confirm he was NOT the object of my perving, perfectly pleasant though he may be.

ComradeJing Thu 13-Sep-12 13:52:39

Christ alive Bruce. shock <rubs thighs>

BobbiFleckman Thu 13-Sep-12 13:52:49

Please will someone pour the lady a drink to go with those nuts you;ve got there?

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 13:52:56

there's a new book?

RosemarySalt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:15

Thanks for answering my question (am swooning slightly in a girl-crush kind of way). I know what you mean about realising that you want to be nice. That's age, it comes to us all eventually grin.

Lexilicious Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:17

Hi Caitlin.

What do you think about Parent and Child/Toddler parking spaces at supermarkets?

grin

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:27

OMG I need to get my shit together, CM answered me TWICE.

The first answer I've ever had on a MN webchat since I was fairly rude to Nick Clegg on his and he got all arsey with me!

<proud>

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:37

Teenage Diaries programme?? I missed that, was it it R4?

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:42

Poor TheBlackShiksa also asked about hair sad

TobyLerone Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:44

You know we're all going to buy it anyway, Dilly. And so does Caitlin. So she can talk about hair and biscuits and poncy wine while remaining secure in the knowledge that we'll all give her our money regardless.

CatPower Thu 13-Sep-12 13:53:55

This is the best webchat ever. Mentions of Popbitch, Menswe@r, shagging popstars and Trio biscuits.

And Caitlin Moran, obvs.

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:54:03

Justine was able to get her hands on a picture of Damian Green ever so quickly....

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 13:54:19

I agree, Dillytante. But I will always be proud of asking Naomi Wolf of why she didn't analyse her mouth-arse connection instead of the brain-vagina one.

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:54:20

Anyone else finding that they're looking at the SBruce picture very, very frequently?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:54:57

SHIT I'm running out of time. Okay - 1) WHAT is the running question? 2) I did NOT have sexual relations with that Menswear. 3) I'm doing a live-streamed Q&A from the Bloomsbury Theatre tonight - details on MY OWN WEBSITE YEAH - www.caitlinmoran.co.uk/ I'm wrestling with the dilemma of coming on stage all sexy in heels in this new amazing tight black dress someone has leant me - or just bopping on in Docs and a flowery dress, but with comfortable feet. WILL I ACTUALLY LISTEN TO THE FEMINIST MESSAGE I PREACH? Tune in and find out.

FrankWippery Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:19

For the love of everything can Olivia give her some bloody gin please.

Caitlin, I think you're great simply because you have the same name as me.

princesschick Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:22

So glad I can be a fuzz-free feminist. grin Phew!

Sorry to those offended / disturbed / confused by the thought of a hair free teste satchel grin It's really not as weird as you think wink

desserttime Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:25

Hi Caitlin,

are you watching Lord of the Rings trilogy again this Christmas?! Love this idea, we've started doing this with Star Wars!!

WhiteHeron Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:27

The Bruce thing made my year.

northernginge Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:38

Isn't snogging brilliant

MinnieBar Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:44
OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:47

question was whats your ipod playlist when running?

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:48

Pagwatch

Justine was able to get her hands on a picture of Damian Green ever so quickly....

As she did it she went "I totally love him in the sex way" and covered his picture in raw almonds, by way of tribute.

BupcakesandCunting Thu 13-Sep-12 13:55:50

I lookat it very frequently, culturemulcher. Very frequently. It's my laptop wallpaper. wink

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 13:56:34

I can't find the actual running question now, but it was something like

you hated running, you now like it, what has changed?

PiggeryJokery Thu 13-Sep-12 13:56:54

Noooo my running question was how did you motivate yourself from being a non-runner to being someone who seems to enjoy running? Pleease!

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:02

Have netaporter finally agreed to give you stuff for free?

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:04

Another Web Chat highlight BOF, true.

WilfSell Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:07

Must go back to work and chip away at the coal face of learning. And I know you've actually Spoken To Me. But... please tell me you sometimes sit at your desk eating chocolate and going fuck I have no idea what to write and I'm going to never eat again and I just can't... ...and then once you start you get verbal diarrhea and write all night on coffee and Haribo and then tell your husband he has to take the kids to school and no you won't load the fucking dishwasher. And then crash into bed berating yourself for your indiscipline before waking up to do the school run in your crumpled 2 day clothes followed by a bottle of wine to drown the guilt? Please? I really, really detest hearing about writers who line up all their pencils before bed every evening and then do an hour of meditation followed by three productive hours of writing and then some vigorous exercise after lunch.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:10

desserttime

Hi Caitlin,

are you watching Lord of the Rings trilogy again this Christmas?! Love this idea, we've started doing this with Star Wars!!

Moved on to Game of Thrones. LOVING the multi-world. Also LOVING my new imperious catchphrase, "I am Khaleesi", whenever I want someone to buy me a drink. "Khaleesi needs a drink." "Khaleesi is going to the toilet." "Khaleesi has just done a little sick."

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:20

I am rubbish at web chats. I love Caitlin and had loads of questions in my brain but to totally thrown by Bruce and buffed balls.

I am going to search Moranthology on audiobook . <sulks>>

FrankWippery Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:30

Here's the running one:

PiggeryJokery Thu 13-Sep-12 13:24:44
Hello Caitlin!

I've just got here and haven't had a chance to read the Qs above, apologies if this has been asked already.

You didn't run, and now you do run and seem to love it. Please could you tell how you motivated yourself to get through the early days of terrible red-faced out-of-breath after 200 metres attempts to the point where it is enjoyable.

I would like to get past the first stages but fail miserably each time I haul my sagging 37 year old body out onto the streets and console myself with cake most times too

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 13:57:36

Thanks for the webchat and Bruce.

sherbetpip Thu 13-Sep-12 13:58:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EdgarAllanPond Thu 13-Sep-12 13:58:19

Hello caitlin

Do you think that the journalists that get the most attention, also get wealthy and comfortable, so that they end up writing only about the lives of the comfortable, and this means society as it is does not reflect itself through a journalists art, but only the nice bits because that's what Journos see as normal (ignoring that great mass of small time journos who earn a crust working for the local rag/their blog etc who have little voice, consequently) ?

you know, Journos may write a very nice piece about an inconvenience they encountered at Waitrose, publish it in the Times,and someone like me reads it and thinks 'That Shit is Just Normal At TESCOS!' ...

I find sometimes the lifestyle journalism i read is not that of a bigger fish in the same pond, but possibly a fish from a completely different, bigger, cooler pond, with waiters and canapes.....

I greatly enjoyed your chain reaction interview with Tim Minchin, it was funny smile there are many questions i'd ask about that, but i'll stick with the above one.

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 13-Sep-12 13:58:28

OMG I love Game of Thrones - I just really hope he doesn't die before finishing the next book.

Minkymum Thu 13-Sep-12 13:58:29

Parsnips. Surely they must be English?
Reading your new book, my snorts were almost loud enough to drown out the sound of my small dog savaging the dog-groomer. As a 42 year old writer who grew up in the wilds of Wolverhampton, I salute you. Long may you rant.

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 13:58:37

OfficialFlyingSquirrel

question was whats your ipod playlist when running?

Bowie. Always Bowie. That's what turned Running Pain into Running Love - just realising that running is basically dancing, but in a straight line. It's my 9am disco.

ThereGoesTheYear Thu 13-Sep-12 13:59:11

I can't think of a clever question, but I LOVE YOU. That is all.

I am strangely proud to use the exact same hair products although possibly smaller quantities!

I have only recently read HTBAW and enjoyed it although i did fine some bits contradictory. Anyway, i lent it to my bff who happens to be a single hot shot lawyer. Even though she enjoyed it she said she felt self conscious reading it on the train. Why can't some people accept that they are a feminist and that's a positive thing? It's frustrating.

And more inane question, red or white?

Bruce was a gift to the whole of Mumsnet.

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 14:00:08

yes it is! the enemy is also good

CagneyNLacey Thu 13-Sep-12 14:00:11

Oh Bugger, i wanted to ask if she had read the Naomi Wolf webchat.

julesjam Thu 13-Sep-12 14:00:15

Catching up late - I blame the pic of Bruce for throwing me off my stride. HOLY SMOKES and I've never even been a fan before now...

Waves at Caitlin You're awesome! That is all. Ironically I'm supposed to be writing at this very moment - you both inspire me and distract me at the same time.

Miffytastic Thu 13-Sep-12 14:00:47

Yay! that answer will please both me (as questioner) and my OH the big Bowie fan in our house (FYI Chemical brothers/ Mogwai for my running list)

OfficialFlyingSquirrel Thu 13-Sep-12 14:01:23

Just realised I have sort of had two mini conversations with CM! does this mean we're BFF now? Can I borrow your blue DMs? smile

CaitlinMoran Thu 13-Sep-12 14:01:35

@bigbenclock on Twitter has just said "BONG BONG", which is how I know it's 2pm. (I haven't needed a watch since I've been on Twitter. LOOK HOW USEFUL IT IS). I must leave. I am GOING! I'm LEAVING! I must TAKE MY FAREWELL. *stands outside door, to listen to what you all say *)

Flippityjig Thu 13-Sep-12 14:02:42

Fab webchat.

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 14:02:45

Thanks for an entertaining hour smile

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 14:02:49

Cameron will totally be reading this and searching shots of Bruce for his next webchat. And will bring Damien too I expect.

gonowkid Thu 13-Sep-12 14:03:10

I love b* even if you even if you didn't answer my question, byebyebye!!!!

strandednomore Thu 13-Sep-12 14:03:42

Great chat but what was she wearing in the twitter pic? (ooops, hope she's not still outside the door listening)

Pagwatch Thu 13-Sep-12 14:03:50

<<waves>> I love you Caitlin...

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 14:04:10

<goes off to follow Caitlin on twitter>

<easily lead emoticon>

LostInWales Thu 13-Sep-12 14:04:42

<sigh> well that was great. Best web chat ever. <Gavel>

SkaterGrrrrl Thu 13-Sep-12 14:04:44

I heart this webchat so much I am pretending not to notice the baby monitor flickering accusingly on the counter. DON'T JUDGE ME.

sandysmum Thu 13-Sep-12 14:05:05

Hi Caitlin, I am joining webchat late so hope this hasn't been already asked...What would you say is the most important thing to teach your daughters? Have a DS and just had a DD- the differences are huge in boys and girls.

PS I love your columns - always make sure I get the Times on Friday and I sit and read it to my husband at lunchtime and we p* ourselves laughing ! Thank you for all the laughs . Your Chain reaction with Jennifer Saunders was brilliant..

OliviaLMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 13-Sep-12 14:05:11

Arrives late, as per.
<<presents bottle of gin>>
grin

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BobbiFleckman Thu 13-Sep-12 14:07:18

I can't belive she didn't tell the tomato pips story :-(

Fab webchat MN !!!
Caitlin is superb and my ultimate tweeter

culturemulcher Thu 13-Sep-12 14:08:18

Tell us bobbi

SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 14:09:52

She would have told the tomato pips story if Olivia had shown up with the gin in time sad

ShiirleyKnott Thu 13-Sep-12 14:10:14

I can't believe I missed it. [saddest face ever]

sandysmum Thu 13-Sep-12 14:11:14

Darn it ..typed way tooo slowly .

FrankWippery Thu 13-Sep-12 14:11:14

Olivia I made an urgent call for you and now we've missed a goodie. <disappointed>

MinnieBar Thu 13-Sep-12 14:13:31

The new Marian Keyes is out?
<runs to Amazon>

Miffytastic Thu 13-Sep-12 14:13:35

We needed 3 hours not one to cover everything properly IMO

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt Thu 13-Sep-12 14:14:14

Come on Bobbi, you know you want to .............

GW297 Thu 13-Sep-12 14:16:47

Brilliant! Thank you.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 14:18:31

yes, could they not be a little longer?

<narrows eyes at Shiirley, strokes beard>

ShiirleyKnott Thu 13-Sep-12 14:30:41

HA!

Yes, she does the RANDOM CAPITAL LETTER things as well doesn't she.

<sigh>

She's so FUCKING cool.

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 14:38:48

oh she is a darling, i think. gives good chat.

She's a bit of a larf eh?

Absy Thu 13-Sep-12 15:03:15

ARGH. I MISSED IT

FastidiaBlueberry Thu 13-Sep-12 15:13:08

So she didn't answer the question about Julian Assange then?

hmm

It's quite a big feminist issue atm. I would have thought that the media's favourite feminist (apart from Naomi Wolf obv) would have a view on it that she'd like to share with mumsnetters.

<Wonders>

BIWI Thu 13-Sep-12 15:25:22

Blimey! I think you need to get her back to answer the other five million questions that were asked! Sorry I missed it. It is my dream to have her follow me back on Twitter <deluded face>

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 15:48:06

yy Caitlin (she is listening outside) you should follow me BIWI. She's super grin

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 16:34:57

She didn't answer my question sad but I didn't think she would.

What I wanted to ask outright but didn't quite have the nerve is about her 'not being nasty about people' stance in her writing & on Twitter. It's a great philosophy & one of the reasons I love her, but, BUT, there are some other female writers on Twitter, some of whom are/were CM's Twitter friends, who I have seen being really nasty & spiteful to other women on there.

Now I realise that a) it's not CM's job to police her friends b) there's two sides to every story and maybe I didn't see the other side and c) perhaps she's not such good friends with these people any more but I wish others could live by her rule of just being a bit damn nicer to people.

I would love it if CM was Twitter's dinner lady who could make the mean girls go off and sit in the corner to THINK ABOUT WHAT THEY DID!

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 16:45:10

oh yes that Blardy Emma Kennedy, who does she think she is? (she invented the word fucktard dontchaknow, and apparently it's got nothing to do with retards).

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 16:49:00

Hmm well I did some googling & perhaps there really ARE two sides to every story.

Still, I love that CM seems to rise above it all and doesn't get into fights. She really should be Twitter's dinnerlady.

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Thu 13-Sep-12 16:58:57

not with you re two sides to every story, mmpies. do you mean emma kennedy?

DillyTante Thu 13-Sep-12 17:00:30

Do share marshmallow

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 17:09:17

I googled it to try & find out the origins of the nastiness I saw on Twitter. Now not entirely sure who started the spat & what it was over, I just saw some really nasty tweets directed at her & assumed she was the injured party.

should concentrate on own life & not worrying about whether certain slebs are friends on Twitter or not.

Either way, CM

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 17:10:18

Oops that should have said CM was not part of any nastiness that I've seen on Twitter.

I missed this sad

The article she wrote about how dreadful library closures are is the finest piece of journalism I have ever had the privilege of reading.

I can't wait to read Moranthology; I have to wait until Christmas though because my mum's already bought it for me.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 17:29:29

Who are you on Twitter, marshmallows? Do I follow you already?

marshmallowpies Thu 13-Sep-12 17:44:57

JenaiMarr my twitter name has part of my real name in so it would out me on here sad

Ooh - as well as CM's article about libraries there was also her very brilliant, very sad piece on what it was like growing up with parents on disability benefit. Worth reading if you can find it online somewhere, pay wall or otherwise...

Feck feck feckity feck I missed it! sad And I was in the house and DS2 was asleep and everything. sadsad

Thanks, everyone, for asking some great questions and most of the ones I'd have asked and THANKS Caitlin for coming! Please come back soon. I luff you much, and now I know you run to an exclusive Bowie soundtrack, I think I may just have come slightly. blush

VivaLeBeaver Thu 13-Sep-12 18:45:44

Missed it all due to bloody work.

I had sex with one of Menswe@r, Simon.

NanBullen Thu 13-Sep-12 19:17:50
SuperB0F Thu 13-Sep-12 20:09:08

Thank you so much for that link, Nan, I'm really enjoying it.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 20:13:17

Thanks Nan smile

For all my being mean about Menswe*@*r ; I had a t-shirt. And saw them twice. I never had relations with any of them though.

NanBullen Thu 13-Sep-12 20:55:25

I wish I could wear green eyeshadow like caitlin, just makes me look ill sad

CumberdickBendybatch Thu 13-Sep-12 21:09:32

I thought everyone had slept with Menswear? wink

also, for this, I love you a lot - "Moved on to Game of Thrones. LOVING the multi-world. Also LOVING my new imperious catchphrase, "I am Khaleesi", whenever I want someone to buy me a drink. "Khaleesi needs a drink." "Khaleesi is going to the toilet." "Khaleesi has just done a little sick.""

MrsKwazii Thu 13-Sep-12 21:12:27

Nan, you just need to find the right shade of green. One with gold tone to it perhaps? Darker greens are fabulous when a bit more metallic. I have a bit of a thing for green eyeshadow grin

CumberdickBendybatch Thu 13-Sep-12 21:14:40

Ooh I think I met Caitlin in London! Have just checked FB and she's a friend of a friend.. I feel very special now grin

CumberdickBendybatch Thu 13-Sep-12 21:17:16

Nan - thanks for the link! grin

NanBullen Thu 13-Sep-12 21:35:30

grin

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar Thu 13-Sep-12 21:36:19

I like those big palettes of cheap make up that you get from supermarkets at Christmas, the ones designed for aunties to give their teenage neices. There are always a few greens in those.

Only problem is making sure you put the same colour on each eye. hmm

NanBullen Thu 13-Sep-12 21:39:59

I'm going to do it, I'm going to go out IN PUBLIC wearing green spangly eyeshadow.

On your head be it!

<drama queen>

Nagoo Thu 13-Sep-12 21:43:37

buy this one it's cheap, you can build the colour, and it stays on smile

I used to slaver my eyelids in vaseline and stick holographic glitter to them. I used to be cool.

CumberdickBendybatch Thu 13-Sep-12 21:56:32

Watching her at the Bloomsbury is like reading all the MN Classics threads at once.

NanBullen Thu 13-Sep-12 22:01:07

well, i could just use some of dd's glittery glue.....

MrsKwazii Thu 13-Sep-12 22:03:59

If you do go with the glittery glue Nan, please pop a photo on your profile wink

Watching the show now. grin She went for the DMs and flowery dress then. grin I love the way she's trailblazing 90's stuff again. I was never as happy in my clothes as I was in the 90's and it's inspired me to dust off my DMs.

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