what the most hilarious and groundless parental complaint you've ever fielded?

(297 Posts)
HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:02:01

I have heard of one parent complaining a member of staff wasn't singing in a parents assembly.

Ruprekt Wed 06-Feb-13 18:06:11

That the crisps that were served at a FREE (FREE) family day - Did I say they were free? - were not Walkers crisps.

We had a letter from one mother. It contained a list of star signs - only children who were born under those star signs were permitted to sit next to PFB.

PFB was 15.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:10:50

OH MY GOD! that is brilliant.

I want sometimes to say to parents "Imagine saying this to mates at the pub, would they take the piss"' if the answer is YES then step away from the keyboard.

this is taking up time we COULD be using to raise achievement.

thefirstmrsrochester Wed 06-Feb-13 18:13:08

Parent forgot that the photographer was coming in to photograph the P1 class. Parent sent dc to school with polo top and jumper (not shirt & tie).
School laid our spare shirts & ties specifically for this reason. Child in question refused to change into shirt & tie so pic was taken in polo top & jumper.
Parent raged to office staff and then the head teacher for allowing this as now she didn't get a school pic of her dc in shirt & tie.
Maybe the dc should have been manhandled into a shirt & tie hmm
And subsequently she may not have made a complaint hmm

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:15:10

snigger.
I think most schools have a designated hair brusher dont they?

CheerfulYank Wed 06-Feb-13 18:35:09

When I was an aide a boy was goofing around on a piece of playground equipment (as kids do) and it got rough and he fell. (He maintained that someone pushed him, which is possible...there was a lot of rough housing going on) He complained of a hurt foot. The nurse examined it, then gave him an ice pack.

His parents took him to two doctors, both of whom said there was nothing wrong. A third doctor finally said it might be a deep bruise or something. His parents gave him a cane to bring to school, then crutches, then finally brought a wheel chair and demanded the teacher push him in it for "long distances"...like down the hall for music. hmm

When the teacher questioned if the wheelchair was necessary for a bruise, they called a meeting with her and the Principal. They wanted to know what the Principal was going to do about the teacher not taking their son's "very painful injury" seriously, and how to address the terrible safety on the playground, and if they could speak to the child they believed pushed him to let him know how much time and money his actions had cost them.

The Principal sorted it all out and soothed them...I sort of wish it'd happened a few years later. We have a new Principal who is all about results and has no time for nonsense. He'd have told them to do one. grin

We had a request once that we maintain the pretence that a child had blue hair. He didn't, it was ginger, but so he 'didn't get a complex' mum told him it was blue.. When we asked her what colour he thought the sky was she just said 'its a different shade of blue'. We declined her request and she complained to ofsted under every child matters...!

2madboys Wed 06-Feb-13 18:45:19

Working at a swimming pool: 'DS is clearly being discriminated because all the other children in his group have got their badge' - er maybe he isn't good enough?
'There is a parent nit-combing their child in the (communal) showers' - perfectly justified complaint but still pretty funny
'There is a turd on the floor in one of the changing cubicles' - upon investigation by the lifeguards, this turned out to be a twix! grin

wakeupandsmellthecoffee Wed 06-Feb-13 18:45:57

Cheerful. That is so bizarre that it almost sounds to far fetched to be true .

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:47:58

i agree re indulging. We had a non attender who was indulged until school gave up and parents were found guilty in court or not ensuring attendance.

HumphreyCobbler Wed 06-Feb-13 18:48:00

some of these are amazing shock grin

my worst was the father who came storming in to class because his son was doing nothing all day. He took is five year old son's answer to what he did that day at school to be absolute, gospel truth grin

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:48:44

i think the wheelchair thing sounds SO likely.

peachypips Wed 06-Feb-13 18:50:38

On ringing round questioning a parent on their year 9's serial non-attendance:
'Where you aware that Kirsty wasn't at school today Mrs X?'
'Oh, yes, she couldn't come in today as her trousers were wet'.
hmm

CheerfulYank Wed 06-Feb-13 18:54:20

I swear by all that is holy, WakeUp, it's true! Shocking isn't it?

I worked in the same classroom (with the teacher and boy) with another student who had ASD. I tried to hint to him every now and then that "oh, I know it's sore, but I think if you walk a bit you'll feel better" and he'd refuse. The poor teacher was in knots about the meeting. sad

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:55:45

we once had a complaint about the girls having those ( god what is it.. ?) cervical cancer innoculations (something like that)

Mum called in
" she aint having that, its not fair, none of the boys have to have 'em"

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 18:56:19

we have had non attendance as " she has to get her nails done'
oh yes

CheerfulYank Wed 06-Feb-13 19:05:53

Gardasil? That's what it is here. smile

bamboostalks Wed 06-Feb-13 19:08:11

Parent wanted child to sit only at lunch table where children were not consuming meat.

bamboostalks Wed 06-Feb-13 19:09:24

Also parent having deliveries directed to school as he knew we were always in. Became incensed when he was told it wasn't possible. Complained to LA.

Lafaminute Wed 06-Feb-13 19:12:49

Haha Bamboostalks - I went to a school where that was an option! Otherwise I think it's really worrying that our future population is being raised by nutjobs!!!!

JustinMumsnot Wed 06-Feb-13 19:13:55

Parent complained that a teacher (not me) had been seen smoking a cigarette at nine o'clock on a Saturday night in a town 20 miles from the school and this was setting a bad example.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 19:15:11

bamboo - what like parcels?

I used to work at an opticians where a 4yo girl once said, when describing how her new glasses felt, that they felt a bit too round.. grin Her Dad was very annoyed that I couldn't give him a reason for why they would feel too round and asked for a second opinion shock AND he was a doctor.

Sorry I realise that wasn't in school.. But seemed relevant...blush

finally notices big words saying The Staffroom

Uppermid Wed 06-Feb-13 19:27:00

These are fab. Keep em coming!

Uppermid Wed 06-Feb-13 19:28:29

Oops am not a teacher. Am I allowed in here?!

dangly131 Wed 06-Feb-13 19:39:12

Complaint that I had lost a child's jumper and why had I not smelt it to find it because it didn't have a name in...apparently it smelt of him and I should know this and why was I not able to do this already?! Same parent complained her child was having to share a coat hook for the day until his was repaired...why could I not fix it myself? It was a stupid thing I had dared ask her child to do for the day in her opinion!

cece Wed 06-Feb-13 19:39:42

Can you stop my daughter playing football at playtime?
No.

Told child N that he really should have his school uniform on, as he had not worn it for nearly 2 weeks. He told me it was 'in the wash'. I told him I could always find something for him the next day from lost property....

Next day whilst doing before school gate duty N's mum stomped up to me. Oh good, thought I, she is about to apologise for the lack of school uniform for the past fortnight. No, she just started yelling at me about how dare I even suggest to put her son in second hand lost property clothes!! She went on and on about it. In the end I had to go and teach my class. She was still fuming so I directed her to the Head's office. Next day N was in school uniform grin.

But not anywhere near as good as some of these grin

FeltOverlooked Wed 06-Feb-13 19:40:44

Went out in the snow to round up the children of parents who hadn't noticed the staff member holding the door open to let children straight in.

One dad complained that I should have come out to tell him. Slightly surreal as wasn't I doing just that at that very moment?

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 19:43:37

Had a parent kick up a fuss once as we didn't supervise the Reception children when washing their hands after trips to the toilet, she was concerned about spread of germs. I politely pointed out that we didn't have enough staff for that, but if she wanted to she could arrange a rota of parents to man the sinks 9-3.30. She never did get back to me about that one!
Another time, not really a complaint, a group of parents at PTA meeting thought it would be a good idea if teachers CVs were circulated to parents- University attended, degree studied, previous experience. Apparently it would help parents get to know teachers, fostering a greater teacher/parent relationship. Head teacher politely told them what they could do with that idea.

PhilMcAverty Wed 06-Feb-13 19:49:25

These are brilliant. I've not taught for a decade now, but I will always remember the parent who called up to complain that we'd scheduled Parents evening on a night when Manchester United were playing, as we couldn't expect people to turn up if we did.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Wed 06-Feb-13 19:49:28

Oh these are just brilliant!!

CheerfulYank Wed 06-Feb-13 19:49:45

thanks to all teachers...you really are my heroes. smile

I love this guy...you might too. smile

MmeLindor Wed 06-Feb-13 19:50:08

Marking place to ensure my kids teachers aren't on here

grin

TeamEdward Wed 06-Feb-13 19:51:30

Oh lordy! Our PTA suggested the teachers CV thing. Where do these loons get their ideas from?!

That teaching children about 'the big bad wolf' was teaching her child to discriminate against wolves based on appearance hmm. She didn't want her child to judge based on stereotypes!

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 19:55:26

Had a dad once who collected his child from school one day a week, he was always late (about 10mins) and it was the day we had staff meeting straight after school. By the time he arrived TA and I would have our handbags on ready to shoot straight off to staff meeting. I had spoken to him several times about the importance of being on time. One day he turned up late as usual and proceeded to have a go at us for making him feel bad about being late. Apparently we were so privileged to be allowed to work with children that time should be of no importance, he did not judge time when it came to his children, instead he concentrated on the experiences they shared, not how long they lasted and we should do the same. My TA piped up if time was of no importance, how come he was never early!

HariboAndWine Wed 06-Feb-13 19:59:08

Pta complained because teachers were not 'showing enough commitment to the school'. They were unable to get enough of us willing to have custard pies thrown in our faces at a saturday morning school fete!

slambang Wed 06-Feb-13 20:01:36

Parent of sporty boy in rugby playing high school wrote a letter to complain that her son's rugby kit kept getting muddy in PE lessons. confused

Uppermid Wed 06-Feb-13 20:02:03

Love that cheerfulyank

gwenniebee Wed 06-Feb-13 20:06:29

I had a parent of a yr 3 child complain, several months after the event, that little X had not been awarded a credit for a certain topic, when all the pupils in Mrs Y's class had been. One of the (many) reasons little X had not been awarded a credit was that his project (a DT type thing) had been entirely done by his dad. Little X wasn't even really able to explain how the thing had been made. The parent didn't mention this to me but took the complaint straight to the head, too.

MmeLindor Wed 06-Feb-13 20:10:00

Sends wineand thanks to all teachers

CaptainNancy Wed 06-Feb-13 20:13:02

Weirdly, our school's staff list is published with their degree (subject, not classification!) and university attended against their name. Not sure what this says about the HT!

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 20:14:13

Request from a parent whose twins were due to start Rec in a two form entry school.
Felt it was too early for twins to be separated, but did want them to be separated eventually. So what would work was to put them in the same class for Reception, at some point between Y1&Y3 they would be ready to go into different classes (parents would kindly tell us once they reached this point). However we wouldn't be able to just move 1 twin into the other class as this would not be fair on them (I had to stop myself from pointing out that would be a Sophies Choice type scenario). Instead we could mix up the whole year group again. Surprisingly we didn't go for it.

Crikeyblimey Wed 06-Feb-13 20:16:02

These are hilarious! I shall c&p them for my 2 sisters who are current and retired teachers. They'll love them. Will pop back when they've told me some of their's.

lyndie Wed 06-Feb-13 20:17:42

I'm not a teacher either, but awesome thread!

At an induction meeting for P1 though a mum stood up and asked the head how he felt that she was having to quit her job because the school had 'failed to provide' wrap around care!

ShakeWellBeforeOpening Wed 06-Feb-13 20:20:15

A parent didn't want us to read 'The Gruffalo ' to the playgroup children as it was going to be too frightening for her daughter .

That 'little darling had to be the child to take the bear home that weekend as the whole family had been told that they were meeting him! We have even planned a special dinner for him.'

sassytheFIRST Wed 06-Feb-13 20:35:39

Some great ones here. My mind is blank about parental complaints but I did have a great parental phone convo once...

Me: ah, hello, is that Mr x?
Other person: err who's this please?
Me: it's mrs sassy, from little Johnny's school. I was wondering if you could explain why he's not in today?
OP: errrr....well...
Me: johnny, is that you?
OP: <panicked voice> no, no... It's me mum!

sassytheFIRST Wed 06-Feb-13 20:36:37

LOVE the astrology 15 year old and the extended family meeting the class bear.

doublecakeplease Wed 06-Feb-13 20:38:40

Mum phoned the staffroom to complain that I'd publicly humiliated her son when I challenged him on his lateness (left a message as I was teaching, rang back half an hour later and complained that I'd not rung her back - apparently she was very busy and I should have come out of class to call her)

I listened to her rant about how hurt her son was, explained our policies and the importance of punctuality then politely declined further discussion due to the fact that her darling was an 18 year old ADULT!! --who had been late for the 5th Monday running mainly due to that fact that he is lazy, 'babied'and usually half high!!

I teach in FE - they STILL ring and complain!!

ProphetOfDoom Wed 06-Feb-13 20:42:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ProphetOfDoom Wed 06-Feb-13 20:46:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FeltOverlooked Wed 06-Feb-13 20:48:03

Matilda, that's hilarious, my son just went away with school (aged nine) and my only request was that his spare glasses went in with the class medicines box rather than his own bag. Teacher agreed as she said "if he's jumped on his bag and broken his glasses, best he hasn't broken his spares too". Sad to hear such long lists of requests for secondary kids though.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 20:49:16

on a more prosaic level, parents who think that you will remember to email homework home for their one kid every week, when you have a turn over of about 500 students every week.

You know, best intentions and all.

Feenie Wed 06-Feb-13 20:53:35

In Reception, a child was allowed to change her name and choose what she wanted it to be. Reception teacher had already labelled trays, pegs, everything, but had to change it all to - Britney. hmm

Then, in Y2, she decided she wanted to change it back! Parent thought this was all fine and we were entirely unreasonable to object.

FeltOverlooked Wed 06-Feb-13 20:55:26

Oh god, Feenie. That scares me. My DD wants to change her name (from the NN form of her name to the full form). I am dreading speaking to the school about it as I know what a pain it will be. They are going to really hate me aren't they? She moves school sites in September, do you think it will mitigate the pain if we ask to do it from then?

Feenie Wed 06-Feb-13 20:58:12

Depends - is she changing it to Beyonce, or Rihanna? Was the equivalent at the time. grin

FeltOverlooked Wed 06-Feb-13 20:59:57

No, she wants to do the equivalent of going from Kitty to Catherine (which she already is on the register but not on pegs, etc). I have impressed upon her that if she does this there is NO GOING BACK.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 21:00:00

And the "copying in" parent.

Oh yes. They email you with something trivial and copy in every single memeber of the WORLD staff.

thats just rude.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 21:00:22

( felt she can just be called whatever it is, doesnt need to be changed)

ravenAK Wed 06-Feb-13 21:03:43

Mum complained that I'd wrongly accused her pfb, aged 14, of swearing.

He'd left tutor time & proceeded down the stairs turning the air blue.

Me <hollering down stairwell> : GEORGE! That's quite enough of that language!

George <voice floating back upstairs>: But miss! It's not me fucking swearing!

Feenie Wed 06-Feb-13 21:08:21

Aw, I wouldn't worry, Feltoverlooked, that's different. smile

FeltOverlooked Wed 06-Feb-13 21:11:36

Phew - OK - thanks - well shall do some more impressing upon her to make sure she is really, really certain. She has sort of grown into the longer form of her name as she's got older and uses it at swimming and so on.

Anyway - sorry all to divert from the terrible tales of parent misdemeanours. Please do carry on!

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 21:13:26

Feenie- we've had a child change her name mid year before, now I don't mind people changing to different versions of the same name, but a completely new name! Please!
Also once had a dad come up to me a few weeks into autumn term to point out we were spelling his sons name wrong. We'd had different spellings on different forms and mum had told us on day 1 which version was to be used. Turns out this wasn't the version on the birth certificate, dad wanted the proper one used, mum preferred her version as it ensured correct pronunciation of said name. I told them to get back to me (mum won!).

Feenie Wed 06-Feb-13 21:17:22

This one changed her name from something totally different to Britney - because of Britney Spears. At four years of age.

Yes, can think of a couple of Mum/Dad disputes re names aswell, very odd!

GingerbreadGretel Wed 06-Feb-13 21:18:17

I was volunteering in a class once and a girl came in with no bandages or visible injury saying "my finger's sore and dad says I don't have to write anything today". I got sent to the office to see if dad had left any note - no note, no notification, but yes, when called we were to let her sit there and not write for a couple of days and why didn't we just believe his daughter, why did we need to check?

GingerbreadGretel Wed 06-Feb-13 21:21:20

Oh, and the same girl missed the class photo and the dad was really, really angry that we didn't reschedule it. We did take some class photos ourselves for her, but he wanted us to get the proper photographer back.

Slinky Wed 06-Feb-13 21:28:41

Ah am loving this thread! Some absolute classics on here! Some explain the very reason I'm leaving the Education sector next Friday!

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 21:29:14

Parents who complained when child was given lead part in Christmas show. Clashed with prep for entrance exams and child could not fit it into schedule, had already sacrificed TV time and ballet class to fit in extra tutoring,couldn't squeeze out any more. Should point out show took place in school hours, but we did ask children to attend 1 after school rehearsal. I think they were given a small roll in the end but ended up 'being ill' on the day of the show.

ohfunnyhoneyface Wed 06-Feb-13 21:36:34

This is brilliant, I'm having a good think to recall my best ones...

mamaduckbone Wed 06-Feb-13 21:45:51

Parent of a (very bright) year 2 child tried to insist that his son should be heard read every day by the teacher. He was asked to suggest what should happen to the rest of the class whilst she did the same x 29 for all the others...

GingerbreadGretel Wed 06-Feb-13 21:52:49

But MamaDuck - her child is special!

GingerbreadGretel Wed 06-Feb-13 21:53:07

(sorry his child... but you know what I mean!)

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:09:20

Of course ANYONE who is on the PTA or a governor their kid gets lead role in plays. hmm

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:11:04

Complaints that staff won't do desperate parents evening appointments for FULLY GROWN ADULTS who happen to be divorced. Because they can't sit next to each other.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:11:44

Separate. Not desparate.

GingerbreadGretel Wed 06-Feb-13 22:13:27

How many lead roles do you have, Hanne? wink

Charmingbaker Wed 06-Feb-13 22:17:41

I've done quite a few desperate parent evenings over the years!
Talking of separated parents once had a mother phone to ask exactly how long her ex husband had been in class helping that morning. She needed to know the exact (to the minute) amount of time as this would be deducted from his weekly contact time.

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:24:31

None!!

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:25:08

Lol. Oh yes. You do hear tmi about divorces often.

FelicityWasCold Wed 06-Feb-13 22:30:23

*And the "copying in" parent.
Oh yes. They email you with something trivial and copy in every single memeber of the WORLD staff.*

IME it's ruder when they write you a scathing/disrespectful email and copy in their teenager! Now that does wind me up!

MavisGrind Wed 06-Feb-13 22:30:32

I will always remember the Saturday morning I was casually clicking through the MN threads and came across am AIBU thread who, on reading, I realised came from a mum to a child in my class. She wasn't (thankfully) complaining about here but was having a good unfounded whinge about school. She had a general flaming and although I'm a paragon of professionalism I've been itching to slip in "It's not unreasonable to say....." into any conversation I've had with her since!

Hanne You might be fond of the vino but I do like your cheekbones and style wink lover of Scandi stuff

Flogship Wed 06-Feb-13 22:30:39

dangly i swear to you that our kids can tell who a lost jumper belongs to by smelling it. Its a small school with 100 kids but still an impressive feat. Maybe your nutty parent isn't as nutty as all that.

MavisGrind Wed 06-Feb-13 22:31:49

complaining about me tsk...

HanneHolm Wed 06-Feb-13 22:37:22

Mavis NO WAY!
Christ

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Wed 06-Feb-13 22:41:28

A parent once complained that I was leaving both of his sons out of the rugby team because I was racist against the English (we are in Wales, they had moved here from London)
The rugby sessions were open to all and his sons hadn't attended any, they showed no interest or inclination to play - when I pointed this out he said it was because they knew I was anti-English. When I said I was born and brought up in England he said I was a Welsh liar!

muminthecity Wed 06-Feb-13 22:42:01

Two weeks ago I had a parent shout in my face for several minutes, told me she was reporting me to the head and to Ofsted, that I was in the wrong job and that she had had to restrain her husband for coming to the school that morning because he was so furious she was worried what he may do to me. Why? Because her DD had gone home with wet socks the previous day confused. The child had no wellies, and it wasn't possible for her to remain inside all day. She hadn't told me her feet were wet, or asked to change her socks. Apparently I should be checking with the children that their feet are not wet on a daily basis, after outside play hmm.

MavisGrind Wed 06-Feb-13 22:42:27

Hanne Oh, yes - way! grin I've been on here for years, have lived all over the world and it's the first time I've recognised an OP from RL.

It was a bit freaky actually..!

muminthecity Wed 06-Feb-13 22:43:32

And I'm not even a teacher, I'm a TA. When the parent spoke to the teacher she was very polite about it all, and spoke to teacher very nicely and respectfully.

Wolfiefan Wed 06-Feb-13 22:53:19

I was accused of picking on a GCSE student after picking up that lots of her coursework (I've been teaching a few years!) was copied and pasted from a website. She didn't even understand what she had written but I was in the wrong.
[Wish I'd let the exam board deal with it emoticon!]

makemineapinot Wed 06-Feb-13 22:54:55

Family having taken son out of school on holiday for 2 weeks, phone on the Mon morning to say they're stuck in a traffic jam 2o miles from school - 3 days later he's finally back! That was week before parents night when they complained o me that their little darling has not been getting enough work to do at school hmm

JaneLane Wed 06-Feb-13 23:03:06

I'm not sure if I'm allowed in here because I'm a lowly careers advisor but I shall venture in anyway!

I was accused of needlessly ruining one student's dreams - I told him that he probably wouldn't get any offers to study medicine with his A-Levels of Sports Science, Geography and Business Studies and apparently his parents thought I was being unreasonable and didn't know what I was talking about...

Schooldidi Wed 06-Feb-13 23:12:14

Mum phoned the school to complain that I wouldn't reschedule an exam for her PFB because they were on holiday. It was a GCSE Maths exam - I am not responsible for setting the dates of those! The dates of all exams had been given to them in plenty of time but they chose to ignore those letter/email/reminders as it would be perfectly fine for us to just let her dd do the exam when she came back.

sashh Thu 07-Feb-13 06:55:12

It's not just parents.

I'm in FE.

I taught a group ITC 1 hour a week 9am, lots of students coming in late.

One student asked why I marked him absent the previous week, I said because he wasn't there.

He said he was. I said maybe I'd made a mistake (I didn't remember him being in class) so could he show me some of last weeks work. Well no, he hadn't done any work, but he claimed he had been in class.

I said he had no proof, I didn't remember him so no mark.

He spent the lesson complaining and the next 20 mins following me round to my next class and then reappeared at break.

I'm 5ft0 and he was 6ft, I was getting nervous.

I discussed it with my line manager before I went that day.

The next day there was an email to my line manager saying I was punishing students by not marking them present if they didn't work, that this was terrible behavior etc. etc. The student needed their EMA and I was being unfair.

The line manager forwarded the e-mail for me to respond.

I started by thanking the tutor for being so professional as to get the entire story before criticising a fellow professional.

ripsishere Thu 07-Feb-13 07:13:36

Not a teacher - DH is poor sod. I have helped out in DDs classes a lot.
There was the mother who decided that her DD couldn't go out for playtime because she was 'virtually albino' and the sun screen made her legs sticky. We were in Bangkok. Try avoiding the sun there.
Another who wanted to know who was responsible for helping the Y4 children change into their swimming stuff.
One more who wanted the staff to ensure their DC didn't finish his milk and fruit at snack time because it put her off her dinner.
One parent made an appt to see DH when he was asst Principal of the school to discuss which options their DC should take to ensure they were accepted to Oxford. We were still in Thailand and the DC was around 4.

ripsishere Thu 07-Feb-13 07:14:29

Third one should be she didn't finish her snack. I think the mother had body image issues, the poor child was as thin as a rake and starving by 9.30

ohfunnyhoneyface Thu 07-Feb-13 07:37:28

Not my student, but a parent complained that their child needed to be allowed to run around outside to let off steam if he has struggling to settle down in class. He was 12.

Another one (in a state school) sent in a note to say that their child could not complete the HW (asking what charity/ies their family supported) as they believed it was encouraging a lack of personal responsibility to rely on charity, and that they only supported the local Private School which their older son attended. Interestingly, their younger son (the one who was set this HW) did not attend the school as he did not pass their entrance exam and they had no SEN provision for his complex needs.

LadyMargolotta Thu 07-Feb-13 07:42:41

ohfunnyhoneyface regarding the boy who needed to run around - is that so unusual? It sounds like a good idea to me. And I know that for some children (not in the UK), it is written into their educational 'care plan' - that they run around the playground a few times if they cannot settle in class.

The parent that wrote comments in their child's exercise book about my marking. We had a long discussion about compl^e^mentary vs compl^i^mentary at parents' evening. They could not got their head around the fact that two goods that go together are known as compl^e^mentary not compl^i^mentary goods.

That or the one who complained about their child's coursework mark (an 'E'). On further investigation the parent had done the coursework for the child and did not like their grade grin.

LadyMargolotta Thu 07-Feb-13 10:06:31

'That or the one who complained about their child's coursework mark (an 'E'). On further investigation the parent had done the coursework for the child and did not like their grade' grin

ohfunnyhoneyface Thu 07-Feb-13 11:41:07

Lady- consider the practicality of it at a secondary school. His classroom is on the third floor, he has five seperate lessons a day, if he started each one running around the playground, could you imagine the time it would take to facilitate that?!

Once children are at secondary school, they need to be able to sit and focus and work. He had no SEN. He was just fidgety. He had a twenty minute break and an hour lunch to expel any excess energy. I think the request was absurd.

Plus- the lesson he was in was very active and engaging- lots of movement in class, active learning, range of stimuli- not as if he was being asked to sit in a chair and not move!

LadyMargolotta Thu 07-Feb-13 11:45:23

I agree, it does sound impractical. But I wonder how much time teachers waste trying to get children like this to sit and listen.

Our school system isn't set up to deal with lively children.

Feenie Thu 07-Feb-13 12:32:57

But for how long do you think we should make provision for these lively characters - surely at some stage we need to equip them with the skills they need to sit and concentrate for a reasonable length of time?

Or perhaps a run around the block should be written into their job contracts later in life?

Perhaps cinema screenings or theatre productions should have obligatory breaks every 40 minutes or so for restless types who have never learned this skill?

A landing on every flight every 45 minutes to break up the journey?

confused

ohfunnyhoneyface Thu 07-Feb-13 12:40:37

Lady, I taught him later on in his school career- he got there in the end. I waste no time on children like that- ignore their bad behaviour, reward their good behaviour, focus on the the learning.

He may have missed out on optimising his learning experience by not giving it his full attention, indeed, he may have found that he would have enjoyed it more if he fully engaged, but his mother's attitude (and it was a shame, as I really liked her!) facilitated his inattention and belief he didn't have to pay attention.

PE teachers loved him though ;)

LadyMargolotta Thu 07-Feb-13 13:13:52

Glad to hear he turned out oksmile

I live opposite a technical school, for children aged 11-18. They have a huge grounds. They do some academic learning. They spend much of their time outside - running, basket ball. They work in the gardens, digging up the earth, chopping down the trees, sawing the timber. I know, because I can see them out of my window. In fact I can see them now, digging in the rain. They learn technical skills such as elctronics and plumbing. Our electrician went to the school.

I think that this sort of education should be an option for all those children who are unlikley to want to spend their lives working in an office.

LadyMargolotta Thu 07-Feb-13 13:15:31

Anyway, sorry for the hijack, it's been an interesting discussion!

TeamEdward Thu 07-Feb-13 13:48:56

Maybe now Gove has shelved the EBacc the way is paved for a decent discussion on the needs for Education reform, and the possibility of more technical schools.

logitech56 Thu 07-Feb-13 18:06:30

the kid who needs a run around, surely he could go for a run before school? or even, shock horror, walk to school himself instead of being driven?

Takver Thu 07-Feb-13 18:21:29

I used to work with a bloke who had to go for a 20-30 mile early morning run before coming into the office, otherwise he was unbearable - perhaps a suggestion for twitchy pupils (he used to get up at 5am & run even on business trips).

dangly131 Thu 07-Feb-13 20:53:59

Flogship - she wanted me to smell the jumpers not the children! She complained about me not being able to find it when I should be able to smell it! Sadly, by the end of the year I could tell it by the smell!

Mynewmoniker Thu 07-Feb-13 21:53:52

The parent who asked that A didn't sit anywhere near his cousin B in the same year because centuaries ago the famillies fell out about some farm land confused

stargirl1701 Thu 07-Feb-13 21:56:35

The bus taking children on a school trip was 2mph over the speed limit - parent was following in their car.

stargirl1701 Thu 07-Feb-13 21:57:56

That the school didn't inform her which day Hallowe'en was so she didn't know when to put the costume on. Hmmmm... The 31st of October, maybe.

stargirl1701 Thu 07-Feb-13 22:00:53

Sports Day was abandoned half way through when it started snowing (end of May - we're in Scotland) so was rescheduled but we couldn't get the playing fields (shared with the secondary). So, we decided to use the playground.

Letter from father. His DD was not to take part in case she fell. If she did, he would sue us for her future earnings as she is a rising tennis star. She's 6.

What does he think she does at every playtime?!?

gloucestergirl Thu 07-Feb-13 22:20:48

Not a complaint but an absence excuse. A year 11 pupil rode his motorbike (moped) into school, but on an icy day his mum rang the school to inform us that he wouldn't be coming in as it was too dangerous for the bike and "he doesn't do the bus"!

Parent came with apparent video evidence showing that her child won the egg and spoon race. It didn't. The mums at the finish line got it right. smile
I set reading homework for Wednesday as due to long weekend we were off on the Monday and Tuesday. Parent complained that they couldn't go back in time to do homework for the day before. I had to point out that there would in fact be another Wednesday next week. grin

stradbally Thu 07-Feb-13 22:30:26

Child didn't feel like coming to his violin lesson at school. Explained would need to come because no message from parents to say otherwise. Came along happily enough. Later that day - email from dad to my line manager saying I'd kidnapped his son and "forcibly held him against his will" thereby causing him psychological damage.

LeeCoakley Thu 07-Feb-13 22:33:18

A dad of a reception child told us to keep another child away from his PFB otherwise he would go to the police. A week later the other child apparently jostled PFB whilst lining up and the dad said it was unacceptable and he was going to go to the local paper about it.

Thought of another one, parent complained I had been seen in Burger King on a Saturday lunchtime as this went against healthy eating policy.
She would have had more to complain about had she seen me at my friend's hen party the night before! wink

ravenAK Thu 07-Feb-13 23:51:22

Actually, I might win the 'role model' award.

I was at a music festival. Bumped into mother of lad I teach being copiously sick in loo. Was quite pissed myself, but not to the point of up-chuck.

I asked if she was OK, passed her a paper towel, commiserated re: pukey dribble on her top. All perfectly amicable. Then I headed back into main venue, cannoning off three walls no doubt in order to do so.

Forgot all about it, until several weeks later when the Deputy Head had a quiet word with me - he also teaches the ds & had had to ring parents about his recent poor exam result. He suggested the boy hadn't done much revision over recent half term holiday.

Parents cheerfully agreed this was probably the case. However, they explained that they had left him unattended whilst they went off to a festival for three days - 'mind you, we all need to let our hair down, & it was half term...if his English teacher's out getting pissed, ha ha, we can't exactly blame our Ben for not working all holiday!'

The festival in question is over a hundred miles away from our home town...

Moominsarehippos Fri 08-Feb-13 07:51:42

I'm taking notes here! This thread is really funny. Classics, please!

BIWI Fri 08-Feb-13 08:29:47

I love the one about videoing the finish at the sports day - how mad/stupid/deluded is that?!

My dad has kept some of the letters he had from parents over the years. One of which was explaining that their child hadn't been in the previous day as he was suffering from bumbago.

whatphididnext Fri 08-Feb-13 09:01:15

Can I add one from the other side. When my Precious was in Reception, they had to wear shirts, ties and blazers.
One very hot day the teacher on morning gate duty was in shorts and a sleeveless top and sandals.

I marched into the Head Teacher's office and lodged and 'official' complaint. I actually missed my train to make the complaint.

I still blush when I think of it. I hope the staff all mocked me in the staffroom.

BlissfullyIgnorant Fri 08-Feb-13 09:48:12

Not a teacher, but was an interfering PTA busybody for a while and got to see the minutes of the class reps meeting with head of pre prep...
1. Conkers are falling off the chestnut trees and are potentially exceedingly dangerous. One actually hit a lady ON THE HEAD...imagine if it was a child. What are you doing to do about it?
2. The school uniform sweaters get a lot of static electricity in them and make the children's hair stand on end every time they change for PE. What are you going to do about it?
3. Girls' school skirts go bobbly in the wash and look awful after only a few weeks' wear. What are you going to do about it?
4. The building work at the (private) house across the road (opposite the main school building) is taking too long and causing a worsening of congestion at school run time. What are you going to do about it?
I could go on...

ThedementedPenguin Fri 08-Feb-13 10:06:00

These are hilarious smile

mollymole Fri 08-Feb-13 10:08:46

I had a parent flame me that their daughter had not received a medal for a cross country race when the rest of the children had. - The fact that she had not competed meant nothing to them, she had not been sick or injured, it was just because the parent did not want to get up ridiculed in front of the class because the rest of them all had a medal It was because she had not been there, no sign, did not turn up. They reported me to the school,
the governers, the local authority and the sports governing body.

mollymole Fri 08-Feb-13 10:11:24

Further to my post above - the girl was not ridiculed in the front of the class because the medals had been given out at the end of the race as each child crossed the line. A lot of the children wore the medal to school in the following week and that is how they found out that their daughter did not have one. - Sorry pressed post too soon above

PrivatelyPeaceful Fri 08-Feb-13 10:25:04

Whatphifi, yours was a totally understandable complaint! Why would anyone mock that? Surely you can see the difference between that and the less rational complaints on this lighthearted thread? Come on, don't be such a grump. I think you are deliberately misunderstanding the tone of this thread.

I once had a father barge into the class where I was teaching (primary) and yell at me that I was deliberately dismissing the class late so that everyone would miss kick off! there was a major match starting at 3. Pm and I was 2 mins late-it was the World Cup or something. we were handing out something special at home time and it took a bit longer than planned but I genuinely forgot about the match ! Was upsetting tbh as I had supported the dc from this needy family to the best of my ability and thought we had a good rapport.

RebeccaMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 08-Feb-13 15:57:55

Hi all,

We've moved this thread to classics now.

Takver Fri 08-Feb-13 15:59:56

"Girls' school skirts go bobbly in the wash and look awful after only a few weeks' wear. "

Now this one doesn't seem that unreasonable to me if the school (as many do) are insisting on a particular style from their shop, charging a fortune for it, and it is crap quality.

I haven't complained to school, but I've certainly had a moan to friends about the school sweatshirts which are expensive, very cheapy-articificial feeling & fall apart pretty much instantly.

HanneHolm Fri 08-Feb-13 16:21:00

New one just in.

Year 9 options. Large school. Three potential choices blocks.
One parent wants ONE kid to do something different. "Is that ok?"

Bakingnovice Fri 08-Feb-13 16:24:32

I'm not a teacher but was helping on a school trip my ds class was going on. In the morning one mum stormed up just as we were getting on the coach demanding written confirmation that none of the parent helpers would be holding hands with her child. Further, she wanted written confurnation that none of the parent helpers would be allowed to take their child to the bathroom or even hold the public toilet door open. The teacher tried to explain that a parent may need to stand in the public toilet area but not inside the toilet to safeguard the child's safety, or to count in/out the kids but this mum was going mental. Held us all up and I could tell the teacher was annoyed.

After 20 minutes the teacher said ' either we set off with parent helpers or we will have to ask your child to stay behind'. Needless to say she pissed off v quickly.

ProphetOfDoom Fri 08-Feb-13 16:32:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FelicityWasCold Fri 08-Feb-13 17:15:33

Parent once complained that I was punishing her for giving her son a sat detention (standard sanction, in home-school agreement, that she had signed).

Her complaint was she didn't want to get up and didn't want PFB to get the bus (through a busy city) on his own at 'that hour'.

That's 11am on a Saturday - PFB was 15YO....

JakeBullet Fri 08-Feb-13 17:18:37

Am not a teacher either but along with loads if others enjoying this thread very much grin.

I promise I am not a parent like any of the I ones mentioned here lol.

Charmingbaker Fri 08-Feb-13 17:29:48

Not a complaint, but could have been. A colleague was doing a topic on 'ourselves' and one parent brought in the video of their child's birth to be shared with the class (apparently you could see his 'enterance into the world'), can't remember how she politely declined but can you imagine the complaints if that had been shown to a Reception class!

ShipwreckedAndComatose Fri 08-Feb-13 18:31:10

I once had a parent come in about her son's science actual summer GCSE exam. she wasn't sure he could make the exam and wondered if we could move it to the next day hmm

PenguinBear Fri 08-Feb-13 19:08:22

Love these!!

I once had a parent complain because I had sent her son home with the wrong jumper. The jumper had his name in, but she insisted it was not his as his was smaller. It was brand new fitted him perfectly and had his name on. He eventfully insisted to his mum that it was his! Did she really think I happened to have one of her name tags and had seen it in?! shock

Same parent also complained that the head should increase the size of the classroom as she couldn't fit her double buggy round all the tables when 29 other parents were also trying to drop their children off. hmm
We offered a member of staff to go outside and wait with her double buggy with 1 baby in but she declined. instead she wanted us to go and collect the whole class from the playground to save her the hassle. That is not the type of school we are so politely declined!

PenguinBear Fri 08-Feb-13 19:09:07

Sewn not seen*

Mynewmoniker Fri 08-Feb-13 19:36:41

Yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaars ago. Multicultural music/dance group invited into small rural school. Letter of complaint 'cos parents were not sending their children to school THAT day to mix with "THAT sort!" shock

candr Fri 08-Feb-13 21:10:08

On a school trip if it was cold could I buy her daughter a hot chocolate but if it was hot could I get her an ice cream? (no cash handed over and very cross that I refused to cater to her LO needs)
My class all smell jumpers to find owner!
A parent went to HT and LA to complain I was bullying daughter by not letting her out to play (child had broken leg and had chosen to stay indoors with friend
On school residential can I take him to the loo at 10pm and 4-5am, can I put his sun block on, brush his teeth and hair and help him dress - oh he also is not to be expected to do jobs, make bed or get muddy! He damn well did the same as others and was able to be dry at night without me interveneing (did have dry night on bed in case)
The list is endless!

HanneHolm Fri 08-Feb-13 23:07:26

You lot who want a class teacher to apply THIRTY lots of sun cream. Just read this and fuck off. ;)

Greensleeves Fri 08-Feb-13 23:15:10

When I worked in a nursery there was a very..... colourful, larger-than-life parent who used to being her dd in fifteen minutes late EVERY day, just as the keygroups were settling to their little circle activity. She would barge in, chuntering at the top of her voice, sit her dc down at the snack table, take some bread out of the teachers' cupboard and toast it for her child's breakfast.

One morning - I shit ye not - she brought her washing in and asked where the laundry powder was, then got shitty when she was politely declined - "this is supposed to be a bloody children's centre, so much for family facking support"

same mother used to have a fucking blue fit if her dc got a speck of organic matter - grass, banana, compost - on her immaculate clothing. How we laughed when it was her group's turn to "help" build the cob house in the nursery garden. Strangely we seemed to have run out of all-in-one splash-suits that day grin

Roseformeplease Fri 08-Feb-13 23:16:36

Gave pupils a book to read which has a scene in which some children kill a chicken, rather cruelly, but it allows for class discussion of animal cruelty, bullying etc. A parent, who clearly hadn't read the book, complained that her daughter wasn't going to read it as she was a vegetarian. This child has never actually read any books I have given her....maybe the pages are made of horse meat?

LilQueenie Fri 08-Feb-13 23:38:35

with regards to the parent claiming it unfair her daughter had the cervical cancer vac because the boys didnt have to is actually a fair point. Boys can be given it. In most cases the virus is caused by intercourse so it is being passed from boys.

HanneHolm Sat 09-Feb-13 07:58:23

I can reassure you that the complaint was not from that position. (And that's really interesting ! )

Coconutty Sat 09-Feb-13 08:20:41

Once on a year 1 school trip we had too many parents offering to come so had to pull names out of a hat. The ones who didn't get picked were really cross and on the morning of the trip pulled up behind the bus in a car and followed us to the animal park. They trailed around behind us and when teacher asked if they wanted to join us for lunch said no, we're not with you, we just fancied a day out. Was weird...then they waited outside the room, glaring in, trailed around behind us all afternoon then followed the coach home!

Coconutty Sat 09-Feb-13 08:25:57

I did complain about a parent once though he wore a t shirt to parents evening which had:

I eat pussy like a fat kid eats cake written on it.

He was at least 20 stone and neither he nor his wife had been in a bath/shower for weeks. He lived in filthy tracksuit bottoms and rude t-shirts. Yuk.

JakeBullet Sat 09-Feb-13 08:39:36

Coconutty.....my DH has just spat tea everywhere gringringrin

....and he "wants a T-Shirt like that"! hmmgrin

Fiderer Sat 09-Feb-13 08:53:54

Parents of a child in my s1's class insisted, even arranged a meeting with the teacher to "explain", that their son must sit next to my s1. It would help him with language learning (aged 7 only colours, singing, "My name is..." etc.) as s1 is a native speaker.

What the parents knew full well is that s1 is a native speaker of English and that year the class was doing French grin

Dylanlovesbaez Sat 09-Feb-13 08:55:19

I have a chief jumper sniffer in my class! At the end of the day she gathers up the 'lost' jumpers to sniff and distribute to their owners! Always gets it spot on.

Claudiecat Sat 09-Feb-13 09:01:23

I've just remembered one (although I've probably got a few when I think about it). Many years ago the class topic was on St.Lucia (the Caribbean island). One parent wrote a complaint to say she was disgusted and why weren't the school studying St.George? It's always these foreign saints! After much hilarity in the staff room, the head composed a letter back pointing out the parent's error and enclosing a copy of the RE planning which showed that in a few weeks we were indeed celebrating St George's day!!!

Feenie Sat 09-Feb-13 13:47:14

DH teaches A level and GCSE English Lit at FE college - he once had a parent complain that the fact that her dd was studying The Wasp Factory was a serious child protection issue. Her dd was 17 - she was a primary school teacher silly cow.

She wanted them to read 'naice' texts. Like the Shakespeare and the Brontes - Wuthering Heights, perhaps. DH pointed out the possible themes of rape, incest, dog hanging, etc, in those kinds of texts and she spluttered a bit but still wittered on!

ToomuchWaternotWine Sat 09-Feb-13 14:06:09

Just wanted to say thanks for this thread, it's hilarious!! grin

wakeupandsmellthecoffee Sat 09-Feb-13 15:22:30

.

ProphetOfDoom Sat 09-Feb-13 15:32:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Uppermid Sat 09-Feb-13 15:39:38

Can I just applaudwhatphididnext for owning up to being one of 'those' parents, even if only on one occasion!!!

cjel Sat 09-Feb-13 16:34:39

DS was a tutor for a year on gap year in New Zealand. Children from all over the world boarded at the school. One boarder didn't go home evenings or weekends despite living 20mins down the road. Last day before Easter break all children safely gone, staff waiting to start break. This 6 year old who hadn't been home all year still left. Head phoned father and said he needed to collect ds. Response was why ? Sorry sir school closed, Father huffed and said he'd see what he could do!!!

kerala Sat 09-Feb-13 16:39:45

My mother is a primary school teacher. A new family arrived having been posted overseas cue lots of meetings before their child arrived at school, they were worried as their DS was incredibly intelligent, super bright how would he fit into a state school, how would staff cope with such an exceptional child etc etc. Child arrived. Perfectly ordinary slightly below average. When this was politely conveyed at parents evening child was whisked out of school and sent to the local private. Made my mother and her colleagues grin poor kid though.

Used to work in the exams office of a FE college.

We had a mother in very indignant that we wouldn't change the date of her daughter's A Levels, because they were meant to be on a beach in Portugal then and would lose money for cancelling. She had assumed it would be fine because she was giving us six months' notice.

But the worst was a bone idle, entitled 18yo Y13 girl who had ordered a full remark of every single paper she had sat at the last session. It was pointed out to her that she would be liable for a large bill if the grades were upheld (from memory you didn't have to pay if the paper had been wrongly marked after all). She accepts, we go ahead.

Unsurprisingly, none of the grades changed, so we duly presented her with a bill for around £450. Her mother came in absolutely raving at us for letting her order all the remarks without her mother's authority, the department would have to absorb the cost, etc etc. It was pointed out to her that the college had a relationship with her adult daughter, not her, and that to contact her in such a situation would therefore be a data protection nightmare.

Unfortunately, although the mother paid up, it resulted in a change of policy at our end, that all copies, recounts and remarks had to be paid for in full before we would send them off. Which I think will have ended up disadvantaging the poorer (in some cases desperately poor) students who couldn't scrape together enough for a single remark in the narrow window between results and remark deadline.

orangeandlemons Sat 09-Feb-13 16:56:13

A parental complaint that the school had failed to permanently exclude someone who had bitten their dd whilst down town shopping on a Saturday. Not even on the school premises, and why y11 go round biting each other is beyond me. They are meant to be nearly fully grown adults.....

orangeandlemons Sat 09-Feb-13 16:58:18

Also, watching the food tech teacher being harangued by a mother because their dd had failed to bring home their cookery, so subsequently the family had nothing to it..... I was totally bemused by it, and the parent was really ranting on and on. I think I stood there catching flies!

orangeandlemons Sat 09-Feb-13 16:59:00

To eat not it.

DoubleYew Sat 09-Feb-13 17:34:04

I'm sorry, I'm going to put a downer on a funny thread but...

Complaints that staff won't do desperate parents evening appointments for FULLY GROWN ADULTS who happen to be divorced. Because they can't sit next to each other.

HanneHolm how do you know they aren't divorced due to domestic abuse? Would you like to sit next to someone who had raped you, beaten you or generally made your life a living hell? Take a look in Relationships or Lone Parents, there are people who will use any opportunity to torment and intimidate their ex even years after the split.

HanneHolm Sat 09-Feb-13 18:06:43

I once had a note asking for me to keep her kid in at break with a hot drink.
Think the parent didn't realise this was my break too

Charmingbaker Sat 09-Feb-13 18:07:29

Once had a Y1 parent complaining about my blatant breach of health and safety' and how 'I'd endangered her child and others'. What had I done? I'd let them use a stainless steel cutlery knife during a supervised cooking activity (we were making sandwiches). She was concerned someone could have seriously cut themselves or someone else. I asked her if child used cutlery to eat his school lunch and dinner at home. 'Of course' was the reply, so I explained to her that as the children could safely use a cutlery knife when feeding themselves, I was confident they could use them in the classroom under supervision.

HanneHolm Sat 09-Feb-13 18:07:59

Oranges. Also that school should be punishing people for Facebook based offences

fuzzpig Sat 09-Feb-13 18:53:38

Amazing thread grin

Doubleyew no-one would dispute the need for separate appointments under those circumstances. I think the point still stands for many divorced parents though. I'll never forget the poor girl in my class forced to sit through two appointments with each teacher on the same night.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sat 09-Feb-13 19:03:51

Doubleyew...usually in cases of domestic violence, the school is kept aware...especially if there is a need to keep members of the family apart

PenguinBear Sat 09-Feb-13 19:15:54

What is this FE college that so many talk of?

missmapp Sat 09-Feb-13 19:20:33

I once separated warring parents on the playground, as I led one sobbing mother away she said

" the thing is missmapp, she called me a fat slag - and I'm not fat"

Flisspaps Sat 09-Feb-13 19:26:01

Penguin FE - further education, so A Levels, BTEC - sixth form is FE but not all FE means sixth form

FE is more likely to do vocational subjects alongside / instead of A Levels. We had catering, beauty, travel, car maintenance, etc, as well as English, Maths, Chemistry, etc. And lots of English and Maths GCSE resits.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sat 09-Feb-13 19:54:35

Love it missmapp!

HanneHolm Sat 09-Feb-13 21:02:56

Thanks shipwrecked. Thought was so transparently obvious I couldn't be arsed to explain. ;)

I once had to arrange parents evening around a right soap opera. Child A's mum had been shagging child b's dad in the village pub's toilets. blush 4 separate appointments for both sets of parents and they couldn't set eyes on each other in case there was another huge row.confused

DoubleYew Sat 09-Feb-13 21:30:37

Gee thanks HanneHolm. Hope it never happens to you. Perhaps you won#t feel like telling strangers about it.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sat 09-Feb-13 21:57:39

confused at Doubleyew

HanneHolm Sat 09-Feb-13 22:05:21

hmm. Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Mynewmoniker Sat 09-Feb-13 22:10:25

DoubleYew. I feel lots of sympathy for your situation but his is a light hearted thread and people are bound to tread on toes. thanks

I have been upset by teachers' comments in reality but I think this thread is a different context. I'm sure HanneHolm didn't mean to make fun; she was trying to get across the complexities of how family situations and school arrangements clash.

SarkyPants Sat 09-Feb-13 22:30:56

I actually think that DoubleYew is making an excellent point.

Light hearted thread or not I think it is horrid to imply that a parent who can't bear to sit next to their ex is being ridiculous. And to imply that the school would always know the full background is utterly naive.

Loving the rest of the thread though smile

Mynewmoniker Sat 09-Feb-13 22:37:50

Lots of posters have implied that parents who want the best for their children are being rediculous.

I have been into school and fought like a lioness for my kids. I bet they had a right laugh in the staff room BUT I'm still finding these threads funny. confused

steppemum Sat 09-Feb-13 23:33:04

School secretary told me this on friday (we were sorting lost property)

parent phones and insists that he dcs coat has been STOLEN. Have you looked in the lost property box? - no. Is the coat named? - no.
secretary suggests lost property and passes on message to teacher about lost coat.
coat eventually turns up.

About 3 weeks later: same parent phones, someone has STOLEN coat. Is it named? - no. Have you looked in lost property - no.
coat eventually turns up.

about 3 weeks later....

you get the idea. The last time she insisted that coat was unique, and recognisable. When asked to describe it, it was Asda coat. We have large local Asda, there are about 5 of those coats in school. Was it named - no - but the labe was coloured in yellow, so it was easily recognisable (to whom?)

Feenie Sat 09-Feb-13 23:36:15

We had worse than that - a parent claimed her son's coat was stolen and literally tore it off the 5 year old child wearing it in the street. sad

Mynewmoniker Sat 09-Feb-13 23:46:17

Parents with secondary kids who are lacking organisation skills demand that the school replace the 'stolen' stationery, bags, watches and clothes all the time. hmm

What do they expect staff to do; follow their kids 24/7 and pick up after them?

And the un-named, un-claimed, valuable/designer stuff that's in the lost property box...well..that's another story.

OeufsEnCocotte Sun 10-Feb-13 00:00:10

A good friend who's a secondary teacher once took a phone call from a father who was so apoplectic that his son had been put in detention that he lost the power of cogent speech; and ended up spluttering "FUCK - NOW - BOLLOCK - OFF" before slamming the phone down in rage confused

ouryve Sun 10-Feb-13 00:10:01

That insisting a boy purchased a new exercise book and copied his 6 pages of work into it was unfair because the swastikas he'd drawn all over his old one were just an expression of his personality and an Indian peace symbol.

ouryve Sun 10-Feb-13 00:11:38

That was the summation of a 5 page letter, btw. The boy's form tutor was in fits of hysterics whilst I read it, as she had a bit of a track record grin

It's a funny one, swastikas. There's something about them that seems to really appeal to a certain type of teenage wanker.

One of the final nails in the coffin which led to me leaving my last school was the time one of my Year 11s drew a massive swastika on his book and displayed it to the class during the lesson. I'm pretty sure it had a reference to me as Hitler too. I had him removed from the lesson and referred him to his Head of House. My Head of Department said I had overreacted and it should have been dealt with with a quiet word after the lesson. hmm

Sorry for the unrelated rant there!

Angelico Sun 10-Feb-13 00:29:35

I once taught a student who claimed I was 'picking on her' - the classic all purpose whine of the numpty hmm She started truanting school etc. Parents had just gone through messy separation and mother of child had decided they were going to have a 'best gal pal' relationship rather than a mother-daughter relationship.

So I was hauled into meeting with EWO and my (supportive) HOD and child and mother. Child put on impressive performance saying she wasn't coming into school because of her terror of me. Mother accused me of all sorts

Then we looked at the days she was in school and the days she wasn't. The days she took off were days I didn't teach her and she came to school on the days I did confused

When EWO pointed this out to her she was shock then angry then wept that the EWO was 'picking on her' too.

Poor EWO was suitably apologetic... Mother of course swept out without a word.

louisianablue2000 Sun 10-Feb-13 01:04:51

Not a teacher but my Mum is. All teachers in her school had to fill in a diary recording any bad behaviour for a specific pupil. When the parents were called in to talk about the lack of improvement in his behaviour the mother produced a diary from home where the son was encouraged to fill in his opinion of his teachers, so when specific incidents were talked about she announced that her son thought the teacher had been rude in that lesson and so it wasn't her son's fault.

HanneHolm Sun 10-Feb-13 07:36:22

A lesson looking at ww1 deaths and imagining a letter home was necromancy. Three page email.

HanneHolm Sun 10-Feb-13 07:37:54

I was very impressed by my colleague who refused to even reply "to such utter tosh "

HellesBelles396 Sun 10-Feb-13 08:12:10

A mum who will take her son's word over any number of staff member's.

A girl who stayed off because her favourite bra was in the wash.

A 14yo whose dm complained to the school because his form tutor had suggested that going to a mid-week guns'n'roses gig was prob not the best plan if it meant he would need to miss two days of school.

A dm who justifies any nasty thing her ds does by saying ah well he holds grudges and that other child was unpleasant to him at first school.

parents who complain to the school when their (under 13) child has something negative posted on their facebook page by someone they've friended.

and since I'm a cub leader - parents who come in and chat over end-of-meeting notices. parents who drop their children off ten minutes late (v disruptive) but complain if the meeting finishes 2 mins late as a direct result. Parents who tick the no additional needs box on the membership form when it is crystal clear that ds has a number of quite severe additional needs.

fengirl1 Sun 10-Feb-13 08:48:51

The family who sent an absence note 'because they had all been up all night trying to catch a mouse', the clearly forged PE excuse note which when I rang the mother I got the response 'doesn't everyone sign 'Mum' then?' - the student in question was 15.... And the family who thought that rather than discuss their child's A level progress, preferred to spend the best part of half an hour complaining that when their child was too hot I declined to open a window and instead asked that they take off their large woolly sweater. They also felt it was unfair that I complained about lack of homework - 'he works 4 evenings a week so doesn't get much time'...... shock

Moominsarehippos Sun 10-Feb-13 10:54:36

In my day if you got told off by a teacher, you'd get hell at home too. Nowadays it seems that the first response is hammering on the school head's door (with a lawyer in tow) demanding blood or you'll hear all about it in the press/parents blog.

Imaginethat Sun 10-Feb-13 11:05:34

Bamboostalks Parent wanted child to sit only at lunch table where children were not consuming meat.

At our school this happens. Meat eaters at one table, vegetarians at another and pure vegetarians at a third.

HellesBelles396 Sun 10-Feb-13 11:17:41

agree with moominsarehippos my mum got into hell when she complained to her mum about being caned at school - no questions asked!

i went to my son's school after he got a bad report to say that, if he wasn't completing work then he could have the work sent home to finish or be given a detention. his ht was surprised!

I have a colleague who had the parents' lawyer turn up to a parent-teacher meeting because the parents couldn't believe their child was failing.

Mynewmoniker Sun 10-Feb-13 11:45:58

That's so true Mooms. I would have been grounded for embarassing the family; "I didn't bring you up with no manners!"

Nowadays as soon as you give a kid consequences for over stepping boundaries you prep yourself for parent intervention whilst the kid sits back watching you both argue.

Takver Sun 10-Feb-13 12:08:06

"In my day if you got told off by a teacher, you'd get hell at home too. " Dunno, Mooms, I'm not that young, and a year or so after I'd left primary a parent came in and punched the Head Teacher in assembly after the HT had humiliated his child.

(To be fair, I think there was general agreement in the village that the parent had a point - the HT definitely had form for bullying behaviour.)

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sun 10-Feb-13 12:42:03

When mobile phones first came in (this was about 15 years ago I think) a friend of mine had a kid in her class who had his new phone out and on the desk. When she asked him why, he said his mum had told him to have it out and to phone her and let her know if any of his teachers gave him a hard time hmm

LizzieVereker Sun 10-Feb-13 13:07:40

Ah, so many stories after 13 years teaching secondary..I'll pick a top 3:

1. The police inspector father who marched into reception and shouted in front of his mortified 13 year old daughter that if I, her form tutor, did not personally find her missing coat by the end of the day, he would report at as stolen when he went on duty that evening. The very stern Head of Year told him that if he considered that to be an adequate use of police time, that was his prerogative.

2. The parents, upon being told that their 15 year old son had been caught quite openly masturbating in class by my colleague, who said that he had "manly urges" and it would be unhealthy if we asked him to suppress them.

3. I worked at a school where there was a large contingent of fundamentalist Christians amongst parents. We invited a speaker from Stonewall to speak to Year 11 students about homophobic bullying. Cue lots of outrage, but in fairness most parents were fine once we explained how all the major religious groups had signed an agreement with Stonewall to fight homophobic bullying. On the morning of the talk I was confronted by 2 parents, one of whom yelled in my face "I do NOT want my daughter talking part in the Gay Pride march today!" confused and even more charmingly "I do not want my child learning about the practices of these animals! They are beasts!"shock

Flobbadobs Sun 10-Feb-13 16:40:02

Reading this thread explains why, when DS's tutor phoned me this week to inform me that he would have to have a detention he actually thanked me for being so supportive! All I said was "if you think it's deserved then by all means go ahead". Thats it, but he sounded so suprised.. Now I know why. A little sad really (but some bloody funny stories grin

HellesBelles396 Sun 10-Feb-13 16:52:24

Ooh - I missed one before (my actual favourite):

Very unpleasant man has two VERY unpleasant children. One year 11 (now left) and one in year 10.

Asst Head phones dad as she has given yr9 a detention which yr9 is refusing to attend. Father confirms that his children do not attend detentions because he's not f@$*ing coming out twice to pick them up.

My preferred way to deal with this was to give yr11 a detention (there was always something) on the same night but AH said no and gave out lunchtime detentions telling father he could some into school to discuss it if he wasn't happy. He never did.

They live under a mile from school - so could walk - and father doesn't work. Interestingly now yr11 has left, yr9 walks to school...

steppemum Sun 10-Feb-13 23:37:57

shock at the 15 yo masturbating in class!!!

Now I feel very old and naive

Haveacrumpet Mon 11-Feb-13 02:40:04

Secondary school girl had been given a book to read with one or two minor swear words in it. Girl was one who could often be heard swearing loudly across the playground to her mates at break time. Father came in (swearing) about use of swear words in the book and proceeded to rip the book up in front of the girl's Engish teacher.

School billed him for the book. grin

Moominsarehippos Mon 11-Feb-13 09:05:47

My sister was a teacher (little kids) and the amount of times parents would march in ('to check her out') when she was new, or to bawl the odds when their little shit told a fairly obvious pack of lies ('miss made me stand in the snow without my shoesb for the whole of lunch break'). Still, better than when she moved to the US - in the UK it was knives she was threatened with (the kids), there its the parents with guns.

My sister is very small but bolshy, and even the really scary parents won't go up against her (the local Marshal says that she can handle anything).

Moominsarehippos Mon 11-Feb-13 09:09:38

I quite fancied being a teacher when I was little. Then I considered the police (until it was pointed out that I'd be hauling dead bodies out of sewers and getting shot at/spat on by lunatics). Soooo glad I didn't do either! (Am a 'creative' so only have to deal with clients throwing toys out of their prams).

Schooldidi Mon 11-Feb-13 12:16:17

Lizzie you've just reminded me of another one. In my first term as an NQT i caught a girl with her hands down the trousers of the boy next to her (they were not a couple as far as I am aware). The parents of the boy were more vocal about the fact that the other pupils had heard me telling them off and what it was about than she was about the fact that her son had been given a hand job in his Maths lesson. They were year 8 shock.

Mynewmoniker Mon 11-Feb-13 17:34:41

It is a comfort to see a parent suprised by these stories. There was I thinking parents were out to get us just as much as the kids grin

Feenie Mon 11-Feb-13 18:25:54

grin

newbiefrugalgal Mon 11-Feb-13 22:03:53

I miss teaching - shock NOT!

doublecakeplease Mon 11-Feb-13 22:12:26

I think we should have a thread about the real crap / abuse we put up with alongside this funny one - won't spoil this one with my rants though!

I used to teach primary - had a y2 mum rant at me on parents evening because her dd couldn't tie her laces or fasten her coat. Had to explain that these were mainly ' learn at home' skills.

candr Tue 12-Feb-13 20:23:22

Had a sharing assembly where parents attend and a LO read out her 'what we did this weekend' piece that had not been vetted by the teacher. LO tells the school and parents that daddy lay on the sofa with hands down trousers farting till mum made him have a bath cause he was smelly and mummy and daddy got drunk and were naughty together. Parents version called out rather hastily was daddy had tummy bug ad was poorly so had sofa day, mum had a glass of wine then they both ate ice cream but left the spoons etc on sofa (which is naughty) and were found by LO in the morning.

Had one child write in my class that 'mummy likes a tipple of port', she peed herself laughing when she saw it on the wall.

Had more than one parent Tell me to let their child win races on sports day - they all got ribbons anyway!

Loved having parents on school trips though and got on great with some though had to shush one mum (while trying not to giggle too much) at a falconry day when she made jokes about bondage when they put the little leather cap on the falcons head

HellesBelles396 Tue 12-Feb-13 20:49:42

I got an email yesterday from a mum who wanted her 14yo son to be able to leave the classroom when he wanted because it was embarrassing and degrading for him to have to ask a member of staff for permission.

Angelico Tue 12-Feb-13 20:57:26

Heh heh candr I like the sound of the falcon mum smile And lol at child's version of poor dad's weekend!

Angelico Tue 12-Feb-13 20:58:40

Helles shock shock shock

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:01:49

Wow charmingbaker I'm glad you're not my kids' teacher. I haven't got to the m&d of the thread yet but pretty much all your examples seem fair enough to me.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:02:18

End of the thread, stupid iPad.

HellesBelles396 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:12:51

angelico he doesn't want people to know he's going to the loo...

orangeandlemons Tue 12-Feb-13 21:14:45

We had one parent who managed to get into the school, evading reception and went into a classrrom where his child was, and started laying into the teacher who was in the midlde of delivering a lesson!

Or the one who had a go at me for marking her child down in exam, as the child had bought it home, and her husband thought he could mark it better hmm

Magdalenebaby Tue 12-Feb-13 21:28:33

Surely you cannot be serious Bessie?
Permanent staffing of Reception toilets?
Teacher's CVs circulated to parents
Child collected 10 mins late every day.
Two entire classes mixed up to accommodate one family.

All that seems fair enough to you?

MrsMeeple Tue 12-Feb-13 21:29:45

Moominsarehippos Mon 11-Feb-13 09:09:38
(Am a 'creative' so only have to deal with clients throwing toys out of their prams).

Moomin: Now you have me really curious if you work with people under the age of three(or so), or not... as the case may be. confused

Feenie Tue 12-Feb-13 21:38:30

Bessie123 You have GOT to be kidding, right? shock

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:43:27

Reminding children every few days to wash their hands would be a compromise though. And what is wrong with circulating cvs? I think that is perfectly reasonable. Where I work, clients see the cvs of client-facing employees as a matter of course. At my dd's school, classes are mixed up every year. I can see it would be traumatic for a child to be the only one moved away from all her friends in her class; it seems to me that the parent was making a reasonable request that the school should consider.

TeamEdward Tue 12-Feb-13 21:49:11

If I were teaching and my CV is distributed to all parents, I would insist that all parent's CVs be distributed to staff - fair's fair.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:52:44

Don't be ridiculous. You are providing a service to the parents, teaching their children. They are not providing you with one. Why shouldn't they know about the people teaching their kids?

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 21:53:23

And why would you want to read their cvs? Really? Would be quite boring.

doublecakeplease Tue 12-Feb-13 21:56:32

Because teachers are answerable to their Head and LEA, not to every parent Bessie! A friend had a fairly low paid job for years, dropped out of teacher training once for personal reasons and eventually qualified with a 3rd. CV doesn't read well but she is an amazing teacher.

MmeLindor Tue 12-Feb-13 22:00:27

Bessie
I am not a teacher, and would be pleased if my kid's teacher had contributed to a humorous thread such as this. Charmingbaker posted that the parent wanted staff to supervise children to ensure they were washing their hands. I think you have misunderstood.

She was not objecting to reminding the children to wash their hands, but to supervising them.

I don't need to see the CV of my kid's teacher. Why would I? I presume that the education authority was satisfied with the qualifications of the teachers.

Magdalenebaby Tue 12-Feb-13 22:00:32

I think you'll find that KS1 teachers do remind children about washing their hands from time to time. That's a completely different thing from standing over them every time they do it and not what the OP was talking about.
Mixing up just one year group in a school where it is not the usual practice - upsetting many children and therefore completely unreasonable.
And my cv, dear Bessie, is none of your business. I don't see what,
other than having their curiosity satisfied, a parent has to gain from having access to it.
I note you don't address Charmingbaker's other points. grin

Panzee Tue 12-Feb-13 22:03:13

We all have to have fairly similar qualifications to teach. Reading a list of BEd or BA, PGCE would be rather dull .

Feenie Tue 12-Feb-13 22:03:46

Don't be ridiculous. You are providing a service to the parents, teaching their children

No - I am providing a service to the children.

Who's being ridiculous?

PenguinBear Tue 12-Feb-13 22:23:59

Agree with Magdalenebaby and Feenie R.E. Bessie123 shock

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:27:26

I'm not a teacher but seem to be a magnet for a very intense mother of a child in ds's class who made the very suggestion re: distribution of teachers' CVs last week. shock

We've got a new teacher and she said parents hadn't been told enough about his background.

I said I thought it was a rubbish idea and that I would be horrified if it was introduced. Also (wickedly) suggested that if she was so keen, she should take the idea to the head.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:29:23

Well I'm really not interested myself but I absolutely don't see the problem with showing parents the cvs. What are you all so ashamed of?

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:32:47

And actually - the whole idea that teachers are providing a service to parents underscores what a previous poster said about how in the past, parents supported teachers and reinforced punishments etc at home, but now parents seem to see teachers as their own public servants.

I think this is terribly sad and goes some way to explaining why dd is having a bloody miserable term so far because a core group of 4 or 5 kids in her class are intent on making the teacher's working life a misery and disrupting lessons at every opportunity. Teacher can come down hard, and the parents will complain. Or can try and carry on, and I feel cross on dd's behalf. Can't bloody win any more.

Similar behaviour (vicious note writing, swearing at teacher, throwing stuff) would have resulted in suspension and parental wrath when I was at school. Now it elicits complaints from parents of swearer/thrower that their child is being picked on. hmmangry

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:35:59

Nothing to be ashamed of Bessie. But why do you want to see the teachers' CVs? Are you in a position to determine whether a teacher is good based just on a CV? Should the school do away with interviews and lesson observations as part of interview process since a teacher's ability to teach can be determined by the content of their CV?

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:39:18

What I mean is, in my profession (not teaching) a CV would tell you that I have x number of years experience, am qualified and where I've worked before. It wouldn't tell you whether I am good at my job.

A CV might be a helpful tool in the recruitment process to someone from the same field. But if I were, say, a lawyer or a doctor, showing my CV to a client or a patient wouldn't actually tell them whether I was a good lawyer or a doctor.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:41:11

Well, I don't think it's unreasonable to want to see the teachers' professional qualifications and experience. If you read my post, I said I wasn't interested but I can understand why someone might want to know.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:42:35

I disagree, pooka. I think you can tell a lot from a cv, particularly for lawyers and docs, but that is a different matter. I think experience can be hugely valuable and a cv will detail that.

Charmingbaker Tue 12-Feb-13 22:43:19

Sorry I'm not accommodating enough for you Bessie.
I didn't think manning toilets was a good use of staff ( though we did get the kids to make posters to help them remember)
At my school we don't mix classes every year, and my biggest objection to the parents suggestion was that they would tell us when it was appropriate to split the children, I assume at your school the teachers make that decision not the parents.
Finally, I do not ask to see the CVs of the doctors at my GPs surgery before booking am appointment.

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:45:42

Really?

I know that the doctors at my GP surgery will be qualified doctors.

I know that the teachers at my dcs' state school are qualified teachers.

As a lay person, non doctor, non teacher, knowing whether they taught at X school or worked at y gp sugery previously does nothing to tell me anything more about their fitness to treat/teach.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:47:50

I don't think your gp's cv is really relevant here. But I presume that if you were looking for a specialist you would do a bit of research? Look at their experience?

Luckily my dcs' school is a bit more caring and understanding and tries to support parents. I like to think that they have a bit more imagination as well and are able to think more flexibly to come up with solutions to parents' problems. I have only had to speak to the head twice but I like to think she would try to be understanding, even if she didn't think the subject matter was that important.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:49:18

Oh come on. That incompletely disingenuous. Of course a teacher's experience will impact on their ability in a role.

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:49:50

I also highly rate my ds's current NQT but actually didn't feel that his teacher last year (been at the school for long time, obviously experienced in terms of years in the post) was as good a fit for him.

Based solely on my own interactions with the two different teachers and also on ds's enthusiasm.

But other parents felt quite the reverse. Different kids and different parents.

Having a CV wouldn't have made a jot of difference to me and my own interpretation.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:51:07

Well obviously you wouldn't rely solely on a cv would you. You would meet the teacher anyway, you would have various interactions. It would be an additional piece of information.

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:53:45

But you're talking about experience in terms of years in the job, aren't you? If you're talking about primary teachers.

Like I said, if I were on an interviewing panel and were recruiting a teacher, then a CV might be a helpful tool.

But as a parent, a CV is not of any use or help since a parent doesn't interview or employ the teacher.

pooka Tue 12-Feb-13 22:55:07

Anyway - apologies to OP for derailing the thread (which I have found very funny).

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:55:57

But the parent might be interested I the teacher's professional background because that may have a bearing on the way they perform.

ProphetOfDoom Tue 12-Feb-13 22:56:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Charmingbaker Tue 12-Feb-13 22:56:23

I have a new hilarious and groundless the complaint.
The parent who has labelled me as uncaring, unsupportive, inflexible and lacking imagination without ever having met me.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:56:58

I agree, this argument is becoming circular. I will bow out and stop derailing the thread.














But you're wrong grin

Charmingbaker Tue 12-Feb-13 22:58:40

Though clearly the parent could complain about my poor grammar in previous post!

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 22:58:58

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Bessie123 Tue 12-Feb-13 23:02:29

I can't do it, I own up. I was trying to provoke a quick row with that last post for funnies. But I feel guilty. So I'm sorry.

ravenAK Tue 12-Feb-13 23:03:17

OK, who's doing it? grin

Not bad, but you need to bung in some screechy stuff about knowing lots of teachers & they all finish work by 4pm...

TINKERBELLE33 Wed 13-Feb-13 00:02:07

Hope this doesn't out me but in for a penny in for a pound!

A few years ago I had a parent screaming at me that their DS had hit another pupil because they didn't respect me as I was too young and inexperienced. They ranted down the phone for a full ten minutes and went on to say DS needed a teacher who had the experience to deal with DS's specific SEN. This was then followed by how I didn't know DS at all and had not built any relationship with him.

After listening to this I calmly explained that I was in fact in my late thirties, had taught pupils with SEN for 14 years, worked with them for 3 1/2 years before that and had a DD with SEN. I also went on to say that I had a post grad qualification in Ds's specific SEN and had been an advisor on this. She was a bit blush when I said that I was surprised she felt I didn't know her DS at all, as two years earlier I had taught DS for 2 years! If she had turned up to any of the meetings she had asked for that term she might have realised who I was.

chocolatetester1 Wed 13-Feb-13 15:44:05

Love this thread! It brings back memories!

dawntigga Wed 13-Feb-13 16:10:08

Place marking.

HopingNotToBeOneOfTheseParentsTiggaxx

poppypebble Wed 13-Feb-13 16:46:12

So many of these are familiar. A few of my own favourites from 10 years in the classroom:

1. Teaching at a school at the other end of the country to my home town, a parent complained that because I had a different accent to her child he felt inferior. Apparently the fact that I didn't drop my aitches was the root of the problem.

2. The mother who rang up at 3.23 (school finishes at 3.15) to complain that I had confiscated her child's can of pop when he opened it mid-lesson and refused to put it away. Apparently when he got it back at the end of the lesson it was flat and she wanted me to refund him the 50p so that he could get a new one. I could hear the lad shouting to his mother and she just repeated it down the phone to me. Had to transfer her to HOY after 30 minutes of circular argument.

3. Parents who requested a meeting because they didn't want their child learning about 'darkies' in RE (this meant studying Islam). Banged on about removing their child from the lesson, which is allowed. When told that they would have to make arrangements to pick him up and drop him back 50 minutes later, they suddenly had less of a problem with the curriculum.

4. Letter from parents explaining that they had not allowed their child to do a piece of homework (leaflet trying to recruit luddites to the cause) as most luddites would have been illiterate so therefore the homework was not historically accurate.

5. Parent at parents evening who asked me to write an essay comparing Hitler to Robert Mugabe so that they could assess whether or not I was intelligent enough to teach their child GCSE History.

6. Parents of a child with 53 behaviour incidents in one half-term (not all in my lessons, btw) who believed that him threatening to hit me over the head with my laptop was a result of a 'personality clash'. They would be appealing his 5 day exclusion as he had only expressed a 'desire' to brain me, not actually done it, and I could have solved the problem by not winding him up (I had refused to unblock the internet in form so that he could play on internet games).

DoctorAnge Wed 13-Feb-13 17:31:40

Poppy I don't know weather to laugh or cry! shock

SmileAndPeopleSmileWithYou Wed 13-Feb-13 17:43:22

I have parents who come to me in the morning to say that I am not allowed to keep their darling in at playtime to do their homework because it was their fault. (i give them a full week to do two pieces).

I once had a parent complain when I had kept her son in that he had done it and handed it in, the boy when asked again in front of me confessed that he hadn't handed it in after all and had lost the homework diary in question. He promised to have a good look at home.
The next morning grandma came in furious that I had "fobbed mum off with a load of bollocks", she knew he had done it because she did it with him. I politely told her that I didn't doubt that but it was not handed in. She continued to shout at me and told me he had no reason not to hand it in therefore I must have hidden it hmm

poppypebble Wed 13-Feb-13 18:20:38

If only teachers had enough time in the day to deliberately lose children's homework.

I'd have to have a separate planner just to keep note of all of the children I supposedly 'pick on'. Perhaps that is why teaching is such a time consuming job? We are all spending our PPA time thinking up new ways to annoy parents and make children's lives miserable.

Honestly though, when you get a bonkers complaint in it can create much mirth in the staffroom, but only if you are in a school with supportive SLT.

orangeandlemons Wed 13-Feb-13 18:22:53

Hmm the amount of stuff I have hiddenor lost would probably fill an aircraft hangar now

poppypebble Wed 13-Feb-13 18:25:45

I especially like it when you get a big song and dance about how you have lost it, how terrible you are etc and then next lesson it is sheepishly brought out of the bag with no apology or even acknowledgement that they were in the wrong.

Ah, the old 'personality clash'. Er, no, I am trying to teach your child (alongside 29 others). I am not trying to be their mate.

Newyearoldmum Wed 13-Feb-13 19:12:36

I love this thread! Really hope I won't be one of those parents when my dd (pfb) starts school in 2016. It also makes me nervous about some if the parents I'll be meeting at the school gates!! grin

RibenaFiend Wed 13-Feb-13 19:24:08

This is absolute gold!

I'm sorry, but WHO doesn't name their DC's clothes? Seriously? It doesn't need to be a rocket science affair using a needle and thread, just permanent marker on the label!

I'm not a "label the socks, vest and pants" person (ok, sometimes but I know that's perceivable as crazy!!!) but come on- smell? Smell your DC's jumper? That's mental!!! shock

ProphetOfDoom Wed 13-Feb-13 19:46:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DoctorAnge Wed 13-Feb-13 19:50:34

grin

ProphetOfDoom Wed 13-Feb-13 20:01:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

poppypebble Wed 13-Feb-13 20:14:06

Love that Matilda. I forgot the parent who waited ages at parents evening and had SLT running around trying to find me (parents get a desk and we walk round, no appointments). He was most put out to be told that I didn't teach his child so he had waited for nothing (he'd already seen his child's actual History teacher). He insisted that I sit down and talk about his child - so I gave him a report on last year and he went away happy enough.

orangeandlemons Wed 13-Feb-13 20:52:43

I teach design and spent 10 years working as a designer. I once had to endure a lecture from a plumber about how he knew all about design and his son was underachieving as I knew nothinghmm. The fact that his ds was bone idle was ignored...

Mynewmoniker Wed 13-Feb-13 21:21:39

Complaint to head about a Teaching Assistand friend as she had very wisely IMHO laminated a little list of things the disorganised SEN secondary student had to make sure he had in his bag to bring to school everyday i.e. pencil, pen, ruler, homework diary etc.
She punched a hole in the laminated ticket and attached it with a treasury tag to the inside of his bag.
This resulted in mum's angry phone call to head next morning saying she was labelling her child. She had to remove tag.
Mum very happy for TA to contribute to form two weeks later for disability living allowance though. hmm

steppemum Wed 13-Feb-13 23:00:09

smelling clothes:
My ds old teacher (who I knew quite well) told me that when she had an unnamed jumper, she would ask the children whose it was. The kids would smell it and say 'oh it belongs to xx miss' They were always right!!!

Not naming clothes - I have just taken home, washed and added to the PTA second hand uniform stash, 12 school sweatshirts without any type of mark in at all. They all have a white label with a space marked name__________ how much effort does it cost to pick up a biro???

Jojobump1986 Wed 13-Feb-13 23:34:03

I was only in nurseries/schools during my training so didn't come across too many incidents & didn't have to deal with them myself but I do remember one occasion in a nursery where a mother seemed to think the staff were being ridiculous & deliberately awkward. At this nursery they were very keen to take the children on regular trips to the forest. Each group got to go on a fortnightly basis & the parents were always reminded the day before. One day a mother chose to ignore the dress code of long trousers & wellies & turned up right before we were due to leave with her DS in shorts & sandals. It was pointed out to her that these trips had been a regular fixture in the timetable since her DS had started 8 months previously & she was well aware of the rule that children had to be appropriately attired & on time to be able to participate. She insisted that he should be allowed to go to the very muddy forest in the middle of tick season in his shorts & sandals because where she's from (Somalia, IIRC) children run around barefoot & most of them are fine! hmm I must admit I just stared at her open mouthed & was very impressed by the very calm teacher nodding sympathetically & saying, "Yes, but we do have our rules and we'd get in to trouble if he slipped or caught Lyme's disease after we'd taken him & ignored our risk assessments. Unfortunately we don't have time to find spare clothes for him now but if you can make sure he's got the right clothes on next time & gets here in plenty of time we can take him then."

Mynewmoniker Fri 15-Feb-13 21:27:27

Teacher friend asked by dad to counsel student as he he seemed very depressed. A few days later dad rang to say whatever he says it's not true shock

Lara2 Sat 16-Feb-13 17:29:52

Parent who ticked the 'No' option on the standard form giving (or not!) permission to take KS1 children out and about in the local area ( you know the type of thing, geography, history type things) because " When we drop them off at school we expect them to be here and learning, we don't want to find they've been taken out of school" - to do what exactly? Perhaps we're skipping off on jollies, browsing in the local shops and eating ice cream? grin

Angelico Sat 16-Feb-13 18:21:42

Some of these really do make you think people should have to pass an exam in common sense before being allowed to have children grin

aJumpedUpPantryBoy Sat 16-Feb-13 19:43:32

Lara2 You've just reminded me of the parent who ticked 'no' on the photographs form.
We had a class event so I took photographs and made sure he wasn't in any that appeared on the school website

The father phoned the head and accused me of having a grudge against his son because all the other children's pictures were online.
When the head explained why he said that I was stupid and should have realised that it was fine to put his picture up in this particular instance - he wanted to report me t the GB for discriminating against his child.

greenandcabbagelooking Sun 17-Feb-13 17:31:57

The dance parent who was upset that her DD only had one costume and someone else had six.

That would be because her DD was three and only did ballet, and the other girl was 18, did four subjects and was in her final shoe before uni, where we like to stick them in as much as possible!

Or the parent who asked finer child could have mince pies and cola as a snack as she didn't like rich tea biscuits and water. Messy food near expensive costumes? I think not. They were only in for two hours, she wouldn't starve.

MoppingMummy Mon 18-Feb-13 15:04:17

These are hilarious!

CruCru Fri 04-Jul-14 09:01:25

A friend of mine was organising the end of term Christmas show (they did Bugsy Malone). It was a bit of a nightmare but she made sure that all the kids got a part. She had a bunch of parents coming in to complain that their kids didn't have a big enough part.

One parent came in to tell her that their child had to have a small operation. She said well okay, if he needs to sit out some of PE that will be okay. They said "well, actually what would make him feel better would be getting a bigger part".

2kidsintow Sun 03-Aug-14 20:14:21

Browsing classics and found this fab thread.

It reminded me of the time a parent came to school to complain that a member of staff had stolen her son's trainers and was wearing them.

Said trainers were found in the cloakroom in about 20 seconds of looking.

Toadsrevisited Sun 03-Aug-14 21:57:12

Parent of overseas female pupil wanted to know what I was doing to help their DD get into Eton for sixth form...? hmm

Groovee Sun 03-Aug-14 22:06:12

Parent got granny to hand in party invites when Nursery opened. All were popped in the pockets each child had. At lunchtime mum phoned to ask why no one had replied yet!

She phoned every day to ask why no one was responding. 90% of the children are in wrap around care so we don't see every parent on a daily basis.

TrendStopper Mon 04-Aug-14 09:53:23

I could come across as one of these parents because I told my dds teacher that my dd will only be doing the main bits of homework ie spelling and maths because the only thing that comes from my yr6 dd having to make random houses, swords, boats out of junk at home is me & her arguing. Homework other than the basics is pointless in my opinion.

mumof2kiddos Mon 04-Aug-14 16:27:08

I am (actually it should be WAS) one of THOSE parents blush

When we moved to UK, my DD was just about 5, and eligible for reception yr. However she was taught the alphabets, numbers reading and writing in her previous school and that made me quite adament with the UK school to put her in yr1 and skip reception as she already knows whatever is there to know apparentlyblush. Request was obviously turned down!

Now although she currently goes to a reputed grammar school and above average in many subjects, by no means she was spectacular at that age!! Infact when I think back, I realise she was infact not even very average, let alone a super-performer at that time. Wonder what the primary school head-teacher thought about me!! Maybe another 'nutty' parent!

spongebob5 Sat 13-Sep-14 19:23:15

I'm not a teacher , I'm a MH nurse. When I worked on a ward a few years ago, we had a young person admitted who appeared to have had a very equal relationship was spoilt rotten by their parents.

One morning staff discovered that the young person had trashed their bedroom. Had written all over the magnolia walls in biro & flung ribena ( or some other red liquid) over the walls & carpet. Mattress had been thrown off the bed & furniture overturned.

When Mum came in to visit, she demanded that her delightful child be given a different bedroom as theirs was in a terrible state!

Her request was deniedgrin

Benedictinemonk Thu 25-Sep-14 08:24:38

Oh how have I only just found these! I'm a (early) retired teacher. For the last 10 years of my career I trained teachers - I was Course Leader for a PGCE program. I think one of my ex-students must have had parents like these - she was a 24 year old graduate.

The Post Graduate Certificate in Education course began with 3 weeks full time classes in the university. Students then began 'school placements'; initially spending 3 days a week (M-W) in school and 2 (Th-F) back at the university for a few weeks, before going full time in schools and starting 'teaching practice'. All this structure was explained to the students at interview, and again at the beginning of the course.

Initial 3 weeks went well, then into the 3/2 day phase. On the second Tuesday I got a 'phone call from a placement school. "Where is 'Ann'?" "She should be with you on school placement." "We haven't seen her since the first Monday morning, she came in for half a day and then said she had to go home and 'you knew about it'." 'Ann' had attended university on the Thursday and Friday, and given me no indication she had not been in school on the Tues/Weds.

I 'phoned her, no reply, I e-mailed her; she eventually 'phoned me. "How dare the school tell you I wasn't there, isn't that private, like under the data protection laws or something? Anyway, I didn't like the school so I've decided I'm just doing the university part of the course." "Erm, 'Clare', this is a teacher training course, in order to qualify you do have to complete your teaching practice in school and prove that you're competent." "Well that's just silly, I've always wanted to be a teacher and I know I'll be good at it."

Never saw her again.

Benedictinemonk Thu 25-Sep-14 08:33:47

Ooops, that's what you get for deciding to change the fictional name half way through and not previewing the message smile

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