To think that middle aged women are really a bit pointless?

(850 Posts)
Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:06:39

What is the point of them?

Really?

colken Fri 21-Oct-11 12:07:48

There is an obvious answer to this question. They have been younger so know what it's like to be your age. You have never been middle aged so you have no conception of what they are.

aldiwhore Fri 21-Oct-11 12:08:23

Now what age exactly are we talking because obviously that makes a huge difference?

I know a few pointless people, but so far they are of all ages, and either gender.

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:08:24

YABU. Without us middle-aged women a) how would anyone know what was going on? and b) what would anyone complain about on MN?

shoot 'em all

OldGreyWassailTest Fri 21-Oct-11 12:08:45

Middle aged women turn into OldGrey's like me - then, because the kids and responsibilities are over and done with, we have a ball I tell ya !!

FearTricksPotter Fri 21-Oct-11 12:09:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Makiko Fri 21-Oct-11 12:09:22

Message withdrawn

CompleteMug Fri 21-Oct-11 12:09:24

I'm nearly middle aged.

And in the absence of a bun, have a biscuit

grin

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:09:26

I have to admit I am rather pointless. I am rounded rather than pointy. Not that I am middle aged of course.

JeremyVile Fri 21-Oct-11 12:10:56

Pointless, yes. And a drain on resources.

topsyturner Fri 21-Oct-11 12:11:01

How old is middle aged these days ? < asks before she nods in agreement or objects strenuously >

Jins Fri 21-Oct-11 12:11:12

I'm middle aged and I'm getting more and more convinced that I'm pointless with every day that passes.

We should rise up in defiance of ... whatever it is

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:12:02

Shall we say 40+?

They are all right for doing chores and such, but apart from that, I can't see what they have to offer.

EssexGurl Fri 21-Oct-11 12:12:37

What is middle aged? I am worried this is me but without a reference point can't comment. So, YABU not to ask a proper question.

Makiko Fri 21-Oct-11 12:12:49

Message withdrawn

JeremyVile Fri 21-Oct-11 12:12:55

..and by resources I mostly mean Tupperware.

The Lakeland restockers just can't keep up sad

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:12:57

40? No, I think we should add another decade or so.

Hassled Fri 21-Oct-11 12:13:04

Without middle aged women there would be no hot flushes. And that would clearly be calamitous for the environment - it's a well known fact that hot flushes play a similar role to the Gulf Stream. Our ability to radiate heat is the only thing between you and the next Ice Age.

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:13:08

I think you lack imagination Hullygully. Us middle-age women make fabulous draft excluders if positioned correctly.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

<goes drowns pointless self>

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:13:39

But we can't spell draught correctly.

ShirleyKnot Fri 21-Oct-11 12:13:42

If you were 48 and middle aged you'd have to live to be 96.

SoupDragon Fri 21-Oct-11 12:13:58

Certainly some women are pointless. I can see several here. I don't think age has anything to do with it.

Makiko Fri 21-Oct-11 12:15:02

Message withdrawn

schroeder Fri 21-Oct-11 12:15:17

What about small boys-what are they for? And dogs? Definitely useless.

And worst of all ugly people

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:15:22

There are so many of them. I think we could allocate say 1 per 10 households once the kids are in secondary school to do all the chores and sort of lose the rest.

Couldn't we find a spare island to put them on?

Dawndonna Fri 21-Oct-11 12:15:45

I have pointy elbows. I can point at you and laugh. I have a point, see?

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:16:42

We can teach the younger generation how not to be so self-absorbed and self-conscious but embrace quirkiness and eccentricity in equal measure. We can call people 'love' and 'dear' without sounding too gay. We can 'faff' with alacrity. We always have tissues.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GladbagsAndYourHandrags Fri 21-Oct-11 12:16:52

I'm feeling at the top of the slippery middle aged woman slope. Can see all the cliches of pointlessness looming. Friend recommended somewhere nice for afternoon tea 'what a treat'. Next it will be me-time and 'I juggle so many things'.

[shudder]

Makiko Fri 21-Oct-11 12:17:13

Message withdrawn

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:18:01

Michael Ball would have to give up the day job. So not all bad then.

Makiko Fri 21-Oct-11 12:18:10

Message withdrawn

Hassled Fri 21-Oct-11 12:18:38

As long as the spare island has a good branch of M&S, Hully.

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 12:18:56

They serve a couple of important functions.

They are there so that chippy fuckers can post 'am I being unreasonable to tell the old hag to mind her own business"

They are they so that chippy fuckers can post 'aibu to tell my fucking mother in law to stop buying stuff for my dc"

And generally they are the perfect person to complain about. They have no value other than to be complained about.

Fuckers

<<shoots self>>

Jins Fri 21-Oct-11 12:19:03

I'm up for living on an island

BupcakesandHaunting Fri 21-Oct-11 12:19:28

In another century, we won't have middle-aged women.

Children of the future will laugh and point at pictures of middle-aged women in history textbooks.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:19:39

ME-TIME!!

yes yes yes

and juggling. I do that for real though to earn a bit of cash. Down the shopping centre, outside bhs, of a Wednesday.

crazynannawitchbitch Fri 21-Oct-11 12:19:41

The tena pad company would go into liquidation without us wink

See what I did there...'liquidation' grin

Jins Fri 21-Oct-11 12:20:40

Not up for an island with fecking M&S though!

THIS middle aged woman doesn't have a waist thank you very much!

marriedinwhite Fri 21-Oct-11 12:20:48

If it wasn't for a middle aged woman you wouldn't be here OP biscuit but as I think this thread is tongue in cheek, we're the ones with the dosh to get the economy going again and I employ a lovely 20 something to do the cleaning and an even lovelier 20 something to do my admin at work. DH employs lots of young uns too so where would you all be without us.

DS is gearing up for some hard snogging too nowadays and if I hadn't been young once there would be no DS to swoon over grin.

Must dash - got to fill a Waitrose trolley and book a hair appointment and get some polyfilla to fill the cracks so I can look like a young 40 something!

aldiwhore Fri 21-Oct-11 12:21:42

40+ is a bit young really.

60+ and well, they can knit and erm.....

I can't wait to be old enough to be considered pointless, I'll happily mooch around with point, I'll enjoy my free time when no one sees me as neither use nor ornament. I think?

Hassled Fri 21-Oct-11 12:23:30

Yeah Hully - why are the old women getting off so lightly? They're pointless too, and they're mean and horrible on buses. And old woman hair always looks crap.

SugarSkyHigh Fri 21-Oct-11 12:24:07

why do younger mums think there's nothing to do once the DC's are all at secondary school? IME that's when all the trouble has started! <looks back fondly to the 6 - 10 yr old period of childhood>

discobeaver Fri 21-Oct-11 12:24:20

Innit. Kill 'em and use their leathery pelts as mobile phone covers.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:24:54

I'm not even going near the old.

They are a whole other kettle of support hose.

pigletmania Fri 21-Oct-11 12:27:18

Right ok round them all up and shoot them when people get to 50, your not immune. So when your 50 you will have the same fate then. Don't be so stupid yabvvvvvvu

niminypiminy Fri 21-Oct-11 12:28:09

To shack up with younger men, obviously. Wasn't it Julie Burchill who pointed out that younger women/older men and younger men/older women are the natural pairings, because young women and older men don't like sex very much -- and young men and older women do grin

whatdoiknowanyway Fri 21-Oct-11 12:28:13

Am worried that I'm totally missing the point of the thread. But here goes anyway.

As an employer I would always go for a middle aged female candidate. They're clued up, reliable, skilled at multitasking and usually good company. Anyone who has been a sahm has usually got some good transferrable skills.

I thought this when I was young. I'm now middle aged myself and am even more convinced.

Middle aged women run my DCs sports club. There are men involved too but they tend to shy away from decision making and decisions are made and implemented by the women. Some of the women WOtH, some don't.

Middle aged women keep stressed teenagers on track - just as challenging as the early years and often much more emotionally draining.

I'm really not sure how much of a pisstake the original post is but I do know a lot of people with very low self esteem and it grieves me when I see how fantastic they are. This is the best time of my life coming up!

Jins Fri 21-Oct-11 12:28:43

I've now decided that as I'm unlikely to live past 95 I'm actually not middle aged after all.

I'm teetering towards old!

Teetik Fri 21-Oct-11 12:29:21

What is the point of them?

THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES WITH ANY REAL MONEY IN THIS ECONOMY

Their spending power is high compared to the rest of us younglings. We'd be sunk if they stopped clothes shopping on weekday mornings or buying anti-wrinkle cream and sticky buns.

OldGreyWassailTest Fri 21-Oct-11 12:29:47

And we can shag without getting pregnant and adding to overpopulation. And we can laugh at 4" heeled, fake-tanned youngsters who think they know it all when we know they don't.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:30:54

But if we got rid of them, we would still have their money. We don't have to burn it or anything.

Bonsoir Fri 21-Oct-11 12:31:30

I agree with whatdoIknowanyway and I am ever more aware that middle-aged womanhood are the foundations of bossy knowledgeable matriarchy, the next life stage when I will rule.

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 21-Oct-11 12:32:49

You wouldn't have my money.... I'd be taking it with me to that HRT Island you mentioned and blewing it on toy-boys, Tena Lady and liquor!

SugarSkyHigh Fri 21-Oct-11 12:32:56

Hully you wouldn't get their money. they leave it all to the RSPCA

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:33:45

HRT Island. I like that.

There would be no toyboys I'm afraid. And everything would be grey.

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 12:33:50

When I gave advice in my twenties no one listened. Now they do grin because I am the old wise woman of the woods.

TheBrideofFrankenstein Fri 21-Oct-11 12:34:09

We could do a Logan's Run type thing to them, but instead of going red at 30, the crystal thing on your palm goes red when you first switch over to Gardeners World.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:34:21

We'll get rid of the rspca. It won't be necessary without all the silly middleaged women and their cat obsessions.

SugarSkyHigh Fri 21-Oct-11 12:35:21

who would plant geraniums and petunias?

TheRealTillyMinto Fri 21-Oct-11 12:35:29

they are people to look up to & learn from.

(i only realise that as i get near to that age myself)

Teetik Fri 21-Oct-11 12:35:39

No you won't get their money. Their kids will just bung it all into paying off their mortgages but will still be skint because we all know what a bottomless pit the average mortgage of an early-thirty-something is. You might see some of it in twenty years' time when the mortgage is paid off two years earlier than they thought.

snailoon Fri 21-Oct-11 12:40:51

Oh Hully, I was just going to say I am useful for petting kitty-cats.

grovel Fri 21-Oct-11 12:41:07

Who would understand apostrophes if middle-aged women were made to bugger off?

Peachy Fri 21-Oct-11 12:48:11

As a carer who will still be one when middle aged (not that far LMAO) I presume I am hereby exempt becuase of the service I perform <<polishes halo>>

as you were

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:48:19

we wouldn't need apostrophes if they weren't around to go on about em.

Apostrophes and the rspca. We'd be well rid.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:48:59

You'd have another 9 houses to take care of too, Peachy. You won't be entirely redundant.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 12:49:25

Who will keep Edinburgh Woollen Mill and Ecco in business? Who will deliver the parish mag?

<sings> Miss Rebecca Hubbard was an strong-willed laydee/ never thinks of using any words like maybe/when she does a job she likes to see it through/and always likes to think that she has lots to do/ like church choirs,flower shows,fetes and dramas/Cubs and Brownies, guilds for farmers/collections for church charities/Garden Parties with High Teas/ And in between these fine activities/Keeps horses, hens and honey bees.

This is what I aspire to. Keep the greying dream alive, sez I.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:49:56

No apostrophes? shock

<faints>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:52:01

Good

we can get rid of:

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)

cuteboots Fri 21-Oct-11 12:52:46

hullygully- What is causing you to feel like this? Have they taken away your bus pass and you cant get into town anymore to play bingo?! Or has the wicker basket fallen off your zimmer frame again causing your knitting to roll down the road?
Maybe your mobile scooter needs a service!!?

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 12:54:43

Also Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield. There will be no place for them in the New Order of Fings.

rockboobs Fri 21-Oct-11 12:54:53

I can't wait til i'm pointless.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:54:59

You would also have to get rid off Waitrose. Ha. What are you going to do now, eh?

<stares at Hully, hands on hips>

Teetik Fri 21-Oct-11 12:55:19

Country Living and She will go right out of business.
Who will be left to buy things in the shape of chickens? Chicken-shape-makers will have to find other employment.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:55:48

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets

Cheeptrickortreat Fri 21-Oct-11 12:55:52

I think they are all on mumsnet telling the young'uns what to do shock

<runs away very fast before i get beaten up>

Sevenfoldedbloodybodies Fri 21-Oct-11 12:56:03

yabu
ffs what is it with mn ant being agist(hopes the op is joking)

Peachy Fri 21-Oct-11 12:56:30

Is that a list we can C&P? fab

Good

we can get rid of:

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Edinburgh Woollen Mill
Doctors on ITV
My MIL wink

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:56:54

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things

come on, we'd miss none of em.

maybe the chicken stuff.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:57:19

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Mumsnet

Malificence Fri 21-Oct-11 12:57:53

Fuck off Hully, I'm not remotely middle aged, I'm in my prime at 45.
I listen to the Killers and Placebo don'tcha know. wink
I'm wearing daring socks today , and stripey knickers.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:57:58

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 12:58:03

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously

brdgrl Fri 21-Oct-11 12:59:45

my family doesn't think i am pointless. i am quite useful for doing laundry, buying 18-rated xbox games, and providing breastmilk. that might be about it, though.

Sevenfoldedbloodybodies Fri 21-Oct-11 12:59:48

I must be the odd one out as I don't find these threads remotely funny.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 12:59:52

you've missed bits off the list!

Agggghhhhhhhhhh <shows middle aged list obsessions>

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:00:07

Membership to the RHS and NT would take a nose dive. As would coach tours.
Catalogues selling leather-look spectacle cases with sheepskin inspired lining, embossed with up to one of your initials - they'd be gone.
Tins of biscuits.

Shakey1500 Fri 21-Oct-11 13:00:20

Book me a one way ticket to HRT island. I shall be the middle aged crooner. And I shall keep you all entertained with acting anecdotes which will start off as "I played a lead role in Shakespeare play don't you know?" which will, as the years roll by and I enter "old woman"- hood be watered down to "I used to..errmmm...hang on, it was important I'm sure.....ah sod it never mind...pass me a ginger snap"

Bunbaker Fri 21-Oct-11 13:00:54

I'm pointless grin and loving it. Perhaps we should get rid of people who make pointless remarks as well wink

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:00:56

YABU

The point of middle aged women is to line the pockets of plastic surgeons, thereby buoying up the economy by increased consumer spending and as a side product looking less offensive to young people.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:01:39

Midsomer Murders and Doc Martin. They'd be off. Or are they ITV and off already?
Last night of the proms
Tutting would be halved

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:01:51

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:02:28

Sue! Do the list properly. <sterna nd agitated in equal measure>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:02:29

Sorry. sad

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
List obsession

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:03:03

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:03:32

grin. See? Tutting.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:03:57

oh well done vermicious

you can be List Manager on HRT Island. You get a special cardy.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:04:56

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans angry

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:05:58

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:06:24

Except your special List Manager one. I've had it crocheted, special.

Planetofthegrapes Fri 21-Oct-11 13:07:31

Adios...

Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap

Cheeptrickortreat Fri 21-Oct-11 13:07:43

I was going to say WI, you got there before me sad

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:08:16

Complan <weeps>

Shakey1500 Fri 21-Oct-11 13:08:18

Can we add Elaine Paige to the list?

Cheeptrickortreat Fri 21-Oct-11 13:08:39

*scotch on the rocks is so not going <stamps foot>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:08:56

Planet - you must put them on the end of the current list. We are compiling a Definitive Guide to the Pointlessness.

Get to it. Pore ol Vermicious is busy with the bedding plants.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:09:02

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:09:32

None of you are doing it properly.

<stamps old foot>

Where's the List Manager?

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:09:53

There she is!

Bless her pop sox.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:10:05

John Barrowman

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:10:27

Per Una

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:10:40

Get your cardie off the list you ungrateful List Manager you. It took me hours to find that pattern in Woman's Weekly.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:10:56

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies

Phew, I'll need a nice cup of tea now...

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:11:01

Antique jugs

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:11:14

Cat ornaments

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:11:34

Actual cats

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:11:44

'Fun' cat cartoons

DumbledoresGore Fri 21-Oct-11 13:11:44

You're all missing the point. Without middle aged women, you wouldn't have little old ladies, complaining about their corns, and criticising the youth of today, and taking up room in buses, and blocking the pavement with their zimmer frames....

Oh ok then, where do I go to be eliminated?

Planetofthegrapes Fri 21-Oct-11 13:12:20

Cat tea cosys

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:12:23

What a list! All that stuff we won't need. It's so environmentally friendly as well as more aesthetically pleasing without the middle-aged.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:12:29

'Fun' cat greetings cards

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:13:02

Put em on th elist, proud.

Pore ol Vermicious is having a valium tea.

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 13:13:17

Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Per una
Hurumphing

5Foot5 Fri 21-Oct-11 13:14:03

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Edinburgh Woollen Mill
Doctors on ITV

I am a bit confused now. I came on to this thread believing myself to be well and truly middle-aged (49) But, with the exception of apostrophes, I don't see anything on that list that I am remotely concerned with. I would have said that this applied more to my Mum's generation (she is 79) and I expect she would be entertained that anyone considered her still middle-aged.

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 13:14:35

I want lots of those little gold stickers with my name and address on. They would be very handy.

Teetik Fri 21-Oct-11 13:14:37

What about voluminous linen outfits? And Danish spectacles?

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:14:38

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly angry
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing

<reaches for smelling salts>

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:14:40

I can do what I like, Hully, I'm at an age where I don't care what people think anymore

<sticks middle aged tongue out>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:15:03

<ignores 5 as is all too hard already>

List, Paggy, List!

When did MAW get so unruly?

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:15:42

Novelty egg cups

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:15:50

Nothing wrong with a nice voluminous linen outfit <defensive>

toomuchmonthatendofthemoney Fri 21-Oct-11 13:16:35

looking at the list, i suddenly feel we DO need to get rid of all this stuff now.

esp Alan titchmarsh. annoying twat.

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:16:37

5 foot I agree.

Coach tours ffs???

I still wear 4" heels (very occasionally if I don't have to move) and am partial to the odd spray tan. The very idea of Edinburgh Woollen Mill, glasses cases or petunias is a complete anathema to me (45).

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:16:40

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:16:45

I'm a middle aged maverick! Running wild and free outside the list!!!!

Mwah ha haaaaaaaaaa

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:17:35

I still wear 4" heels (very occasionally if I don't have to move) and am partial to the odd spray tan. The very idea of Edinburgh Woollen Mill, glasses cases or petunias is a complete anathema to me (45).

<weeps>

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:17:41

Zumba classes

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:17:51

Downton Abbey

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:18:10

Get in the list! Get in th elist!

<marshals and flaps frantically>

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:18:19

Cliff Richard <snorts peppermint tea all over keyboard>

THE WI????? What are you lot on???

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:18:28

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Making homemade birthday cards

takingbackmonday Fri 21-Oct-11 13:18:36

I'm 23 and cannot say I really have a point. I also really care about apostrophes, waitrose, country living, quality streets and cardigans (pretty ones with dresses, not large M&S beasts).

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:19:08

Sorry Hully, I shall slink off to my acrobiotic aerobic class tout suite grin!

Hassled Fri 21-Oct-11 13:19:09

All that stuff can go except the Caramac. You've gone too far with the Caramac.

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:20:14

Holidays in Portugal also should be on the list

Hassled Fri 21-Oct-11 13:20:18

Golf clubs, people who play golf and all things golfing. Can they go?

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:20:20

<snort>

Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point

<have lost the run of the list entirely>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:20:33

You are a FauxMAW, taking back. You have yet to complete your training if you do not have a secret crush on an ITV doctor and a snaeking yen for a cat ornament.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:21:16

Isn't Doctors on the BBC, anyway?

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:21:47

I've missed the point totally SuePurbly, look at me getting all defensive in a positively menopausal manner grin!!

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:21:54

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting

elastamum Fri 21-Oct-11 13:22:06

Its not all WI you know. I'm middle aged so if you want to do away with the likes of me you will have to add:

Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
grin

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:22:19

Holidays in Portugal and Madeira

Where's the poor List Manager?

It may have all got a bit much.

VERMICIOUS?
VERMICIOUS?

Unreliable MAW List Managers

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:22:41

WOMAN'S OWN

<Still not in list, still not in list - this is so EXHILERATING! I feel young, and crazy and emancipated!!!>

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:01

BRAN FLAKES

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:01

We're in discussions of the day so not completely invisible!

Bellbird Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:01

When I was at college one of my bfs was a mum (mature student) who'd just turned forty. She was so cool - she'd lived and was still living and completely not self-absorbed. At the sports clubs I've been in, the older ones always seemed so chilled and reasonable. Frankly, they are the least embarassing and together people and they're far better at dealing with men. I'm almost there myself which will give me an excuse for watching Eggheads, having a sustainable garden due to budget restrictions (composting, growing from saved seed etc), baking lots of pies and doing long distance walks.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:04

no elastamum, you are a young woman in a MAW body. You just need to get surgery.

gramercy Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:09

Philippa Gregory novels ("I do like history - it's so fascinating how people used to live" [for full effect use Linda Snell voice])

book clubs

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:27

<snort> at snorting being on The List

<waves> at jajaswolef. Where have you been? Hiding?

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:29

SCHOLL'S

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:23:43

You are so in the list, you are in there with ol Paggy.

<relaxes>

hiddenhome Fri 21-Oct-11 13:24:49

Young people are pointless hmm

They lack experience or wisdom
They're boring
Their faces have no experssion
They're not capable of independent thought
They don't have much money to spend on interesting stuff
They don't have time to do anything interesting because they're either studying or on facebook

grin

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:25:23

you start your own list, hidden. We've got enough trouble here.

Jins Fri 21-Oct-11 13:25:31

Organiser handbags?

elastamum Fri 21-Oct-11 13:25:33

Cant afford surgery, am spending everypenny on having a good time with my boys

Oh and pls add BF's who dont care if you have wrinkles!

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:25:58

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls

Teetik Fri 21-Oct-11 13:26:04

I know someone who paints sploshy watercolours for novel covers.
It's a good living and he has a family to support so let's give him a break

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:26:21

<panics that flagrant touting of The List rules means her submissions are not being added to said List>

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:26:43

Phew. Thanks <contrite and put in place>

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:26:58

YY to organiser handbags, also

Elevensees

Can I just point out that coach tours is on the list twice?

Anniegetyourgun Fri 21-Oct-11 13:27:22

I don't need a point. I just am. And that's the best thing about being middle-aged - moving into "couldn't give a flying pair of fingers" mode.

However I suspect this was in fact Hully's original point, so I'll just slink off and, oh, knit something probably. Cats permitting.

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 13:27:44

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
But not Pagwatch because she figured out how to do the list on her iPad and is no longer that much of a twat.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:28:00

Having a sustainable

Hoh yes.

Ok, let's give splashy watercolour paintings on novel fronts painter a break. Or not.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:28:14

Course it is coldsancerre - they've got to get home again.

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 13:28:52

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
But not Pagwatch because she figured out how to do the list on her iPad and is no longer that much of a twat.
Oooh. Battenberg and Maderia cake

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:28:54

Vermicious, you'll have to sort Paggy out. She's gone all awry.

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:29:25

Pag you're about two pages behind with your list I'm afraid.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:29:50

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Boyfriends who don't care if you have wrinkles
Fragrant list touting (and flouting!)
Splashy watercolour novel covers
"couldn't give a flying pair of fingers" mode
Elevenses
Pagwatch

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:30:29

Actually, lists are a bit middle aged womanish. Can you add lists to the list please?

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:30:36

SuePurbly aroooooooooo to you too!! I just can't keep up, not hiding just slow blush. Must be cause I'm a MAW confused... grin!

David Attenborough programmes

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:31:46

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:31:59

Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves

<skips about unfettered by lists>

BestIsWest Fri 21-Oct-11 13:32:27

Can I add Fitflops and Boots No 7

Ariesgirl Fri 21-Oct-11 13:33:27

Cats are featuring heavily.

<looks at own cat coasters and cat placemats>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:33:33

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:33:52

The Archers

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:34:12

Fit PLOPs!!

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:34:26

Slippers

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:34:47

WARNING TO SUEPURBLY

I too brazenly swerved the list but you run a grave risk of being disqualified.

THINK CAREFULLY.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:34:57

<rebels and refuses to put The Archers on the list>

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:35:03

Vermicious, you are making me larf muchly.

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:35:16

Me roo, can't do list thingmy

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:36:17

The ARchers have to be on there <I lurve it too, apart from Pip, Susan, Ed, Will, Emmerrr, Nick, Jennifer.....>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:36:19

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 13:37:40

Oh I am Chief Gimmer.

Too middle aged to keep up with the list.

sad

isn't it cold though. <<sucks on Werthers>>

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:37:52

I could go off you though <hurt>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:38:13

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are
The Archers (grudgingly)
Werthers
Sucking

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 13:38:28

Judge Judy

<<fuck the list>>

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:38:58

Why does Cliff get an !

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:39:43

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are
The Archers (grudgingly)
Werthers
Sucking
Judge Judy
People who would shock fuck the list
Exclamation marks
Silly questions

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:40:27

Clapping hands while dancing

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:40:42

Whooping while clapping hands while dancing

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 13:41:09

Hands up who knows (without Googling) who J Campbell Kerr is.

This will sort the real middle aged bags into revealing themselves.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:41:10

High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:41:54

Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:43:09

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are
The Archers (grudgingly)
Werthers
Sucking
Judge Judy
People who would shock fuck the list
Exclamation marks
Silly questions
Clapping hands while dancing
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Coming up with list items which are too long
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:43:12

NevergoogleJCampbellKerr

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:43:29

I still want to know what Having a sustainable is

Bugsy2 Fri 21-Oct-11 13:43:45

Middle-aged women are pointless because they've done a list for old people!!!! Of maybe that was intentional & therefore pointed - so that everyone middle aged is thinking oh no, I would never be seen dead in Lakeland with Alan Titchmarsh, so I'm not middle-aged.
Sad, obsessive compulsive & deeply middle-aged Bugsy needs a definition of middle-aged & probably a severe beating for thinking about this thread for longer than it takes to suck a Werthers Original.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:43:46

Look what you've done, proudnscary. You've confused me. angry

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:44:32

I don't

<does the MAW walk of shame>

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 13:44:33

I don't know who in the hell J Campbell Kerr is - good or bad confused?

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:44:55

I think it is poo-talk Hully.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:45:18

Shit sorry - it's like my middle aged fingers have a demonic life of their own. Can you take the second one off???? Is that within the rules???

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:45:19

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable garden
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are
The Archers (grudgingly)
Werthers
Sucking
Judge Judy
People who would shock fuck the list
Exclamation marks
Silly questions
Clapping hands while dancing
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Coming up with list items which are too long
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
People who don't google J Campbell Kerr

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 13:46:23

ColdSancerre is a HUGE fan of J Campbell Kerr and so is Hully

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:46:28

Apparently 'Actor J Campbell Kerr is a familiar face to audiences in Glasgow and throughout Scotland, where he has performed for over twenty years.'

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:47:27

Blood I've only ever been to Glasgow in the sense that we ssort of drove through it on the way to catch the ferry to Mull. I certainly don't remember attending a pay there.

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 13:47:43

Cold

The real answer is even sadder than that grin

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:47:43

pay play

Bloodredrubyblue Fri 21-Oct-11 13:48:28

Think The Peoples' Friend and Mrs Doubtfire type grannies.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:48:39

I remain extrememly concerned at the people shock fucking the list.

Is that really necessary?

Show some restraint here MAW.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:48:50

Barging small children off the dancefloor while singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping while dancing

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:49:30

Hully - I am not 'shock fucking' the list, but it sounds quite erotic

FrightNight Fri 21-Oct-11 13:50:16

Can we add The Daily Mail please?

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 13:50:18

Right I have to go out to buy werthers and sell cat ornaments in th echarity shop

Do NOT mess up the list. <List Anxiety>

It's all up to you, List Manager Vermicious. No pressure.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:50:51

Triumph's bestselling bra: the 'Doreen'
Buying Carnations because they last so well

FrightNight Fri 21-Oct-11 13:51:30

Proud you need to add "wafting up voluminous linen skirt and flashing support garments (in beige)..."

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:51:43

Rovers

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 13:51:47

apostrophes
the rspca
parish mags
ecco
woollen mill
kittens
petunias (nasty flowers)
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
bingo
wicker baskets
waitrose
country living
she
chicken shaped things
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Peachy's MIL
Mumsnet
People who take threads like this seriously
RHS and NT
Coach tours
tins of biscuits
odd spec cases
List obsession
Last night of the proms
Countryfile
WI
Cardigans
pop socks
Lakeland
Past Times
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
Garden centres
Good Housekeeping
All Antique shops
Complan
Artic rolls and caramac
Quality Street
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Imperial Leather soap
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Elaine Page
Tutting
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
Tea cosies
John Barrowman
Per Una
Antique Jugs
Cat Ornaments
Actual Cats
Fun cat cartoons
Cat tea cosies
Fun cat greeting cards
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
Hurumphing
Gold stickers with your name on
Voluminous linen outfits
Danish spectacles?
Novelty egg cups
Cliff Richard!
Coach tours
Zumba
Homemade birthday cards
Peppermint tea
acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Golf clubs
People who play golf
All things remotely to do with golfing
Waterfall cardigans
Tapered slacks
Court shoes
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Missing The Point
Snorting
Proudnscary (again)
Branflakes
Womans Own
Immodium
Watching Eggheads
Having a sustainable garden
Baking lots of pies
Doing long distance walks.
Teenaged children
Ski holidays
Festivals
Dogs
Horses
Hillwalking
Climbing trips
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Dying your grey hair blonde
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Phillipa Gregory novels
Book clubs
Scholls
Organiser handbags
Battenburg and Madeira cake
David Attenborough programmes
Lists
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Hats on parcel shelves
People who skip
People who are unfettered by lists
Fitflops
Flipflops
People who don't know what Fitplops are
Boots No 7
Suepurbly
Slippers
Fitplops
People who know what fitplops are
The Archers (grudgingly)
Werthers
Sucking
Judge Judy
People who would shock fuck the list
Exclamation marks
Silly questions
Clapping hands while dancing
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Coming up with list items which are too long
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
People who don't google J Campbell Kerr
People who abdicate responsibility for their own lists like Hully
Barging small children off the dancefloor while singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping while dancing
Daily M*il

<storms out of the door before Hully and locks the door from the outside>

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 13:52:04

Actually Rovers, Volvos and Nissan Notes.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 13:52:22

Lipstick on teeth
Weeing a bit on trampolines
Laughing too loud
Weeing a bit while laughing too loud

Right am also off to high leg kick and wee a bit in real life.

I look forward to an orderly list later.

BellaDonnaSansMerci Fri 21-Oct-11 13:52:24

Peering over reading glasses...

<peers>

FrightNight Fri 21-Oct-11 13:52:45

Hully are you going to Friday Afternoon Club round the church with my mum?

BellaDonnaSansMerci Fri 21-Oct-11 13:52:56

Fuck me, I knew that bastard Volvo was a mistake.

JeremyVile Fri 21-Oct-11 13:53:28

Can you not alphabetise the list? Would that be too middle aged?

FrightNight Fri 21-Oct-11 13:54:47

Musicals staged in local theatres both watching and performing in.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 13:56:03

oo yes, Am Dram. Also singing in wavery voices. At inappropriate times.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 14:00:46

acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Actual Cats
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
All Antique shops
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
All things remotely to do with golfing
Alphabetised lists
Am dram
Antique Jugs
Any type of peering
apostrophes
Artic rolls and caramac
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Baking lots of pies
Barging small children off the dancefloor while singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping while dancing
Battenburg and Madeira cake
bingo
Book clubs
Boots No 7
Branflakes
Buying Carnations because they last so well
Cardigans
Cat Ornaments
Cat tea cosies
chicken shaped things
Clapping hands while dancing
Cliff Richard!
Climbing trips
Coach tours
Coach tours
Coming up with list items which are too long
Complan
country living
Countryfile
Court shoes
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Daily M*il
Danish spectacles?
David Attenborough programmes
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Dogs
Doing long distance walks.
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Dying your grey hair blonde
ecco
Elaine Page
Exclamation marks
Festivals
Fitflops
Fitplops
Flipflops
Fun cat cartoons
Fun cat greeting cards
Garden centres
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Gold stickers with your name on
Golf clubs
Good Housekeeping
Hats on parcel shelves
Having a sustainable garden
High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Hillwalking
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Homemade birthday cards
Horses
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Hurumphing
Immodium
Imperial Leather soap
J Campbell Kerr
John Barrowman
Judge Judy
kittens
Lakeland
Last night of the proms
Laughing too loud
Lipstick on teeth
List obsession
Lists
Missing The Point
Mumsnet
Musicals staged in local theatres both watching and performing in
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Novelty egg cups
odd spec cases
Organiser handbags
parish mags
Past Times
Peachy's MIL
Peering over reading glasses
People who abdicate responsibility for their own lists
People who are unfettered by lists
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
People who don't google J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know what Fitplops are
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
People who know what fitplops are
People who play golf
People who skip
People who take threads like this seriously
People who would fuck the list
Peppermint tea
Per Una
petunias (nasty flowers)
Phillipa Gregory novels
pop socks
Proudnscary (again)
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Quality Street
RHS and NT
Rovers, Volvos and Nissan Notes
Scholls
she
Silly questions
Singing in wavery voices at appropriate times
singing in wavery voicesat inappropriate times
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Ski holidays
Slippers
Snorting
Sucking
Suepurbly
Tapered slacks
Tea cosies
Teenaged children
The Archers (grudgingly)
the rspca
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
tins of biscuits
Triumph's bestselling bra: the 'Doreen'
Tutting
Voluminous linen outfits
Wafting up voluminous linen skirt and flashing support garments (in beige)...
waitrose
Watching Eggheads
Waterfall cardigans
Weeing a bit on trampolines
Weeing a bit while laughing too loud
Werthers
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
WI
wicker baskets
Womans Own
woollen mill
Zumba

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 14:01:21

Right, that's your lot. angry Now bugger off, I have work to do. angry Important work. angry

Whatmeworry Fri 21-Oct-11 14:02:00

Will no one think of the toyboys?

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 14:02:39

Tissues stuffed up the end of your sleeves.

YA OLD GIMMERS

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 14:03:26

<prints> <laminates to make wipe clean>
Bugger

grovel Fri 21-Oct-11 14:04:02

We could get rid of thank-you letters. Only middle-aged women miss them.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 14:04:39

acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Actual Cats
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
All Antique shops
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
All things remotely to do with golfing
Alphabetised lists
Am dram
Antique Jugs
Any type of peering
apostrophes
Artic rolls and caramac
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Baking lots of pies
Barging small children off the dancefloor while singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping while dancing
Battenburg and Madeira cake
bingo
Book clubs
Boots No 7
Branflakes
Buying Carnations because they last so well
Cardigans
Cat Ornaments
Cat tea cosies
chicken shaped things
Clapping hands while dancing
Cliff Richard!
Climbing trips
Coach tours
Coach tours
Coming up with list items which are too long
Complan
country living
Countryfile
Court shoes
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Daily M*il
Danish spectacles?
David Attenborough programmes
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Dogs
Doing long distance walks.
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Dying your grey hair blonde
ecco
Elaine Page
Exclamation marks
Festivals
Fitflops
Fitplops
Flipflops
Fun cat cartoons
Fun cat greeting cards
Garden centres
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Gold stickers with your name on
Golf clubs
Good Housekeeping
Hats on parcel shelves
Having a sustainable garden
High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Hillwalking
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Homemade birthday cards
Horses
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Hurumphing
Immodium
Imperial Leather soap
J Campbell Kerr
John Barrowman
Judge Judy
kittens
Lakeland
Last night of the proms
Laughing too loud
Lipstick on teeth
List obsession
Lists
Missing The Point
Mumsnet
Musicals staged in local theatres both watching and performing in
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Novelty egg cups
odd spec cases
Organiser handbags
parish mags
Past Times
Peachy's MIL
Peering over reading glasses
People who abdicate responsibility for their own lists
People who are unfettered by lists
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
People who don't google J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know what Fitplops are
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
People who know what fitplops are
People who play golf
People who skip
People who take threads like this seriously
People who would fuck the list
Peppermint tea
Per Una
petunias (nasty flowers)
Phillipa Gregory novels
pop socks
Proudnscary (again)
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Quality Street
RHS and NT
Rovers, Volvos and Nissan Notes
Scholls
she
Silly questions
Singing in wavery voices at appropriate times
singing in wavery voicesat inappropriate times
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Ski holidays
Slippers
Snorting
Sucking
Suepurbly
Tapered slacks
Tea cosies
Teenaged children
The Archers (grudgingly)
the rspca
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
tins of biscuits
tissues shoved up your sleeve
Triumph's bestselling bra: the 'Doreen'
Tutting
Voluminous linen outfits
Wafting up voluminous linen skirt and flashing support garments (in beige)...
waitrose
Watching Eggheads
Waterfall cardigans
Weeing a bit on trampolines
Weeing a bit while laughing too loud
Werthers
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
WI
wicker baskets
Womans Own
woollen mill
Zumba

higgle Fri 21-Oct-11 14:05:04

Not shaggable!!! Not shaggable!!!! Middle aged people do far more shagging than the worn out child rearing younger people ( and we are far more adventurous) Most of those things on your various lists are the preserve of the over 70's not those of us who got on the housing ladder early enough to have loads of dosh and loads of fun. No one I know whoudl be seen dead in a waterfall cardigan or a Nissan Note.

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 14:11:02

What the chuff is a Nissan Note?

Anyone listening to The Archers right now? Who the heck is Aunt Chrissy? She's carp well crap even

gettingalifenow Fri 21-Oct-11 14:12:06

My additionss to the list would be:

Hand bag sized first aid kits 'just in case'
Fold up shopping bags to caryr in your handbag
Hand bag sized hand gel
Garden centre tea rooms

headfairy Fri 21-Oct-11 14:17:17

Can I add leather trousers please. Not battered sexy as hell biker trousers slung halfway down the hips of a slinky 20 year old goddess, I mean the all too neat and tidy, ever so slightly high waisted bootcut variety only middle aged women seem to wear.

ps I'm middle aged, so I'll get me coat grin

witchyhills Fri 21-Oct-11 14:25:52

I'm sure this is supposed to be funny, but you've just finished me off.

garlicBreathZombie Fri 21-Oct-11 14:28:57

You missed out:
Collecting plastic tubs, yoghurt pots and empty jars.
Forgetting what we'd come in for.
Moist toilet tissue.
Chin bristles.
Eating the leftovers.

<guilty>

I like middle aged women. They're like the sane ones in the room full of mad pink elephants that is society. So often if I have been in a group of people, it is the middle aged women who are the most interesting. So there.

<approaches middle age hopefully>

garlicBreathZombie Fri 21-Oct-11 14:36:12

Oh, yes, strawberry. The very best thing about it is taking no crap & not caring what "everybody" thinks smile

I am enjoying it.
Apart from the chin bristles and the leaky bladder.

sportsfanatic Fri 21-Oct-11 14:37:32

You are all so missing the important point of middle aged women.

As every fule knows when women reach middle age we become invisible, which means we don't take up any room,which leaves all you young uns free to fornicate and reproduce without overcrowding the planet any more.

Bledkr Fri 21-Oct-11 14:39:12

Im not being funny but who els would wear "mid heels" not flats but also not 6 inches. I have moved effortlessly into those at the same time as into my 40's,cant walk in high heels anymore but not quite ready for the ballerina punp hmm

garlicBreathZombie Fri 21-Oct-11 14:41:00

Good point! Plainly, it doesn't matter that I stand vacantly in the niddle of shops, wondering what I'd come in for and leaking a little in the knicker area, because nobody can see me!

Hmm, I might take up shoplifting.

gordyslovesheep Fri 21-Oct-11 14:41:23

i live in wedges - i cant do high heels they make my eldrly hips hurt

the main point of us 40+'s is we don't give a fuck if anyone see's the point in us - we are too busy enjoying life without the angst filled self doubt of the teen - 30 brigade - it's great grin

ColdSancerre Fri 21-Oct-11 14:45:43

nissan note

very easy to get in and out of, easy on the old knees

wordfactory Fri 21-Oct-11 14:47:27

Surely one of the most vital functions of middle aged women is keeping middle aged men in check.

Without us they are convinced that orange converse are perfect for a balding fifty year old.

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 14:49:13

Thank you Sancerre <can't believe I actually looked blush>

Bledkr Fri 21-Oct-11 14:50:38

Yes to wedges,i pretend its cos im still so funky i like to get pissed and have a boogie but its really the comfort-oh the comfort.
I have become more chunky of thigh too so need the heel height to leg lengthen-another point of the middle aged is to stick up for younger people on buses when the elderly kick their pushchairs and blaspheme at them grin

thefirstMrsDeVeerie Fri 21-Oct-11 14:51:41

I see it as my job as a middle aged woman

to laugh at young men with their trousers round their arses
to call young, harrassed women behind the counter at River Island, 'sweetheart'
to tell people my age and then stare at them hard until they say 'NO! you dont look it'
to practice my street talk in order to embarress my children
to not give a big fat flying fuck what people think about me

with all that to do I bearly get time to sit down and watch Downton.

gordyslovesheep Fri 21-Oct-11 14:52:26

added bonus garlicZombie if you get caught shoplifting you can blame it on the 'change' wink [hring] <--- my inner crone !

gordyslovesheep Fri 21-Oct-11 14:53:01

oh these modern computers confuse me grin THAT is my inner crone ffs!

LynnCSchreiber Fri 21-Oct-11 14:53:28

I cannot believe that no one has added

Strictly Come Dancing
Daniel O'Donnel
Westlife
Being concerned about it being The Done Thing
Swapping winter and summer wardrobe (although that might be a UK thing)

Bledkr Fri 21-Oct-11 14:53:33

Yes and to dye my hair purple to try and look younger,oh yes and to get a tattoo grin

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 14:54:15

Where is the List Manager? Is she having a lie down? I thought it was Margery's turn for a tea break.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 14:56:11

I am hiding but watching in dismay as people on this thread keep flouting the all important list rules.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 14:57:04

it's anarchy.

<shakes head sadly>

garlicBreathZombie Fri 21-Oct-11 14:58:52

grin gordy grin

Yes, have been considering deep pink hair meself. Not sure whether it would resolve the invisibility question, though ... or if I want it resolved wink

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 15:01:35

It is simpy shocking, Hully, isn't it. And saddening. sad These people simply don't appreciate proper lists.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:03:43

We shall have to give serious thought to just who is admitted to HRT Island and who is shoved over board en route

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 15:05:59

Indeed. I think we should ban all of them for not being middle aged enough.

Bledkr Fri 21-Oct-11 15:08:09

Neck to ankle control pants?? Giving endless amounts of money to grown up dc's who seem to still manage to go out drinking but can eat or pay their bills??

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:12:24

You could flounce to the other thread. But don't - at the moment they seem to think we're all young. Let them, do. I feel all spritely.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:20:38

<Sets sail with List Manager Vermicious in secret because no one else can be trusted>

They'll all be sorry.

Where were we going again?

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 15:22:14

I can't quite remember. Hold on, I'll just check my list.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:23:47

You need MA Sat Nav. With a Cath Kidston cover, voiced by Victoria Wood.

agedknees Fri 21-Oct-11 15:25:59

I am the invisible woman - but only since I have become middle aged.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:26:12

Did we bring the thermos? It's a bit nippy.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:27:21

I've got a thermos with me. Not paying cafe prices.

<checks bag for stash of UHT milk and sugar robbed from said cafes>

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 15:28:42

Hully, I see the error of my ways. I feel partially responsible for this sorry mess. Now all is lost. Anarchy indeed. Middle aged anarchy <twitches>

agedknees Fri 21-Oct-11 15:28:44

Have you all brought your spare tena pads?

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 15:29:29

I'm coming! I can be trusted! I've chaaaaaaaaannnnngeedd...!

<thrown overboard by middle aged arsey pirates>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 15:30:41

Hmm, what do you think, Hully. Shall we be nice (in a middle aged sort of way) and give them a second chance?

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:32:13

Welll

<eyes em beadily through odd spec frames>

Have they got their Millets jackets against the icy breeze?

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:37:39

Cotton Traders <brandishes label> 30% off - shop soiled.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:39:31

That sounds good, Sue. I've got a pair of those canvasy trousers where the bottom half unzips, just in case the sun comes forth.

Pagwatch Fri 21-Oct-11 15:41:18

Proper tills in shops. Where you chat with the lady as she beeps your shopping and asks you if you have a bag and need help packing.

They will be gone soon <<gloomy>>

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:41:27

Mine roll up with little velcro bits to hold them at a flattering mid-calf. So handy

DrMunkenstein Fri 21-Oct-11 15:42:37

Bumper packs of floral notelets?
Bmper pack of notelets with kittens on them?

DrMunkenstein Fri 21-Oct-11 15:43:51

I apologise for my second spelling on bumper blush

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:44:10

I always chat to the ladies on the tills in Sainos. I win their trust and sympathy and get them to tell me their woes and how many items they have to get through per minute without the manager telling them to hurry up and why the manager is a spotty 17 yr old git and why Sainos stinks. Then I tell them I work for Head Office.

That's a bit mean, isn't it?

DrMunkenstein Fri 21-Oct-11 15:44:12

Of, not on.

I give up.

Wine o clock?

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 15:45:50

I have notelets with cups of tea on them. Actual arty shots of brown tea in a cup <wins MA comp>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 15:45:53

It's sherry round here. A nice schooner. With some salted peanuts.

DrMunkenstein Fri 21-Oct-11 15:50:03

Hully i ain't fussy!

Am counting down...

Cup of tea notelets? Nice! I have random ones with dresses and flowers on them.

JajasWjolef Fri 21-Oct-11 15:53:41

I have hot buttered crumpets and a nice pot of Earl Grey - anyone?

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:01:28

Yes I'm starving. Have just stuffed down a load of toast, but always room for a nice crumpet

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:01:48

Oh yes please! A nice cup of Earl Grey is just what I need. smile

I've got most of this shit mentioned.

I'm 40 soon and instead of buying another chicken-shaped piece of cack I'm going to get pissed and go to a gig and get oral in the cinema.

You gotta have goals grin

BellaDonnaSansMerci Fri 21-Oct-11 16:03:47

I just made an apple crumble cake because I had apples and eggs to use up...

Can we add "using things up" or is the list closed now?

<offers cake>

elastamum Fri 21-Oct-11 16:04:22

Its alright for you lot with your earl grey and crumpits, I'm middle aged and still stuck at work! (although I do have a very fit 30 something man sat next to me) wink

The point of them is surely to provide free childcare to prop up the economy and reduce the need for subsidised places?

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:05:48

Can we add "using things up" or is the list closed now?

Hmpf. There is no list. People have spoilt it. angry

Bugsy2 Fri 21-Oct-11 16:07:38

envy at elastamum, I'm middle aged & at work with no fit young man next to me. I'm so middle aged I had to think about what "get oral in the cinema" meant. I had visions of LaurieFairyCake being a bit shouty in the cinema!!!!

LynnCSchreiber Fri 21-Oct-11 16:10:41

acrobiotic aerobic class hmm
Actual Cats
Alan Titchmarsh, Aled Jones, David Essex, Michael Ball and Pip Schofield
All Antique shops
All charity shops (no volunteers you see)
All things remotely to do with golfing
Alphabetised lists
Am dram
Antique Jugs
Any type of peering
apostrophes
Artic rolls and caramac
Babycham, advocat and Dubonnet
Baking lots of pies
Barging small children off the dancefloor while singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping while dancing
Battenburg and Madeira cake
bingo
Book clubs
Boots No 7
Branflakes
Buying Carnations because they last so well
Cardigans
Cat Ornaments
Cat tea cosies
chicken shaped things
Clapping hands while dancing
Cliff Richard!
Climbing trips
Coach tours
Coach tours
Coming up with list items which are too long
Complan
country living
Countryfile
Court shoes
Crocheted special list manager cardigans (unless they are for Hully)
Daily M*il
Danish spectacles?
David Attenborough programmes
Days out riding rollercoasters with the kids
Doctors on ITV (poss itv altogether)
Dogs
Doing long distance walks.
Doing the above whilst still holding down a full time job
Drinking too much wine with your mates
Dying your grey hair blonde
ecco
Elaine Page
Exclamation marks
Festivals
Fitflops
Fitplops
Flipflops
Fun cat cartoons
Fun cat greeting cards
Garden centres
Gin and tonic, scotch on the rocks
Gold stickers with your name on
Golf clubs
Good Housekeeping
Hats on parcel shelves
Having a sustainable garden
High leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Hillwalking
Holidays in Portugal and Madeira
Homemade birthday cards
Horses
Hot sex with boyfriend without the worry of pregnancy
Hurumphing
Immodium
Imperial Leather soap
J Campbell Kerr
John Barrowman
Judge Judy
kittens
Lakeland
Last night of the proms
Laughing too loud
Lipstick on teeth
List obsession
Lists
Missing The Point
Mumsnet
Musicals staged in local theatres both watching and performing in
Novels with sploshy watercolours on the front cover
Novelty egg cups
odd spec cases
Organiser handbags
parish mags
Past Times
Peachy's MIL
Peering over reading glasses
People who abdicate responsibility for their own lists
People who are unfettered by lists
People who can't spell 'Elaine Paige'
People who don't google J Campbell Kerr
People who don't know what Fitplops are
People who don't know who J Campbell Kerr is
People who know what fitplops are
People who play golf
People who skip
People who take threads like this seriously
People who would fuck the list
Peppermint tea
Per Una
petunias (nasty flowers)
Phillipa Gregory novels
pop socks
Proudnscary (again)
Proudnscary, Pagwatch and other people who don't know how to make lists properly
Quality Street
RHS and NT
Rovers, Volvos and Nissan Notes
Scholls
she
Silly questions
Singing in wavery voices at appropriate times
singing in wavery voicesat inappropriate times
Singing the wrong words while high leg kicking while whooping while clapping hands while dancing
Ski holidays
Slippers
Snorting
Sucking
Suepurbly
Tapered slacks
Tea cosies
Teenaged children
The Archers (grudgingly)
the rspca
Things that are 'wipe clean'
Things that fold up to go in your handbag like plastic hats and reusable bags
tins of biscuits
tissues shoved up your sleeve
Triumph's bestselling bra: the 'Doreen'
Tutting
Voluminous linen outfits
Wafting up voluminous linen skirt and flashing support garments (in beige)...
waitrose
Watching Eggheads
Waterfall cardigans
Weeing a bit on trampolines
Weeing a bit while laughing too loud
Werthers
Whooping while clapping hands while dancing
WI
wicker baskets
Womans Own
woollen mill
Zumba
Strictly Come Dancing
Daniel O'Donnel
Westlife
Being concerned about it being The Done Thing
Swapping winter and summer wardrobe (although that might be a UK thing)
Using things up
Storing ONE spoonful of potatoes in tupperware for yer Dad's lunch tomorrow

Can I come on board, I have the list. couldn't be arsed with alphabetical order though

Maryz Fri 21-Oct-11 16:10:58

Do we get a choice as to whether we clean ten houses or live on a desert island. Because I would prefer the island, please (to whoever is allocating).

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:11:03

Using things up is a doozy. I will be having a cold potato, some of DD's leftover sweetcorn and a veggie sausage worked into my supper tonight. All saved in my tupperware.

Middle aged orgasms are MUCH better than young'un ones.

All multipley and great for the skin. grin

<goes off for a kit kat shuffle - think about it bugsy> wink

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:11:49

Fuck the list.

<radicalist>

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:14:02

Can we add "using things up" or is the list closed now?

Hmpf. There is no list. People have spoilt it

<cries>

FannyNil Fri 21-Oct-11 16:14:56

Our point is that we don't like silly, shouty little girls

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:14:58

I am totally and utterly pointless and I have been for years. I've been pointless since I was about 32, I'd say. I did find a point once, but it didn't really suit me, so I chucked it.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:15:12

Oh well done Mme Lindor. <Pins Deputy List Manager badge on her ample frontage in floral pinny>

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:15:45

Fuck the list.

shock

<has palpitations> <hyperventilates> <faints>

Oh go on then, I'm a bit sick of the list anyway. Especially as MmeLindor has messed up the alphabetisation up.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:16:00

Who's seen the other thread about this one?

<weeps more>

ouryve Fri 21-Oct-11 16:16:18

This 42 year old is still bringing up Primary school aged children. I think they see the point of me, as does DH.

Sevenfoldedbloodybodies Fri 21-Oct-11 16:16:31

lets hope mn hq now delete this one

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:16:33

I haven't actually read this thread but now I've just glimpsed MmsLindor's list my curiosity is piqued.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:16:38

FannyNil, is that a suggestion for the list? I'm not sure it's in the spirit.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:17:48

<clasps Vermicious to bosom in apologies for fucking the list>

Which thread Hully? Linkage sil vous plait

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:18:00

No, I don't think we want Fanny Nil's one, it doesn't have the smack of Countdown about it.

Pore ol Seven hasn't quite got it either.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:18:35

Sgone Pinot. Twas a sterling tribute to the Frothing Berserkers is all I'm saying.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:18:44

It's been deleted, Pinot.

Apparently some people have taken this thread seriously...

<cackles manically>

is that how you spell manically?

BeyondLimitsOfTheLivingDead Fri 21-Oct-11 16:19:07

Its gone.
Someone spectacularly missed the point!

grovel Fri 21-Oct-11 16:19:34

Do MILFs belong on the list?

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:20:28

Tena Ladies MmeLindor, you forgot Tena Ladies. they may have been mentioned up this thread-- I haven't read.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:20:54

oh for the love of god.

Some bastard has stolen a lot of posters sense of humour recently.

<<despairs>>

Ooh that a MA thing, is it not - despairing?

Verm! List! Stat!

Maryz Fri 21-Oct-11 16:21:05

I have a feeling that this is the type of thread that you have to be in on from the start to have any idea of what is going on. And I wasn't sad.

Though I am clever enough to realise that it is a lighthearted, jokey, fun thread [preens], which some people seem to have missed confused.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:21:24

This 42 year old is still bringing up Primary school aged children. I think they see the point of me, as does DH.

Well, this 42 year old is also still bringing up Primary school aged children. But I also see the point of this thread. grin

BeyondLimitsOfTheLivingDead Fri 21-Oct-11 16:21:49

I'm going though, I'm positively a whippersnapper and you're all old enough to be my mum grin
though the list is scarily appropriate!!

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:21:50

Mary, it really isn't very demanding...

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:22:27

No, Pinot. I am done with the list. It was not appreciated sufficiently. sad

Sevenfoldedbloodybodies Fri 21-Oct-11 16:23:46

I will show my age now, I feel like margo in the good life as I don't get it

grovel Fri 21-Oct-11 16:24:09

I would volunteer to help with the list but it's pointless. And my contribution would be invisible.

Well one could say that kids are bliddy pointless when the planet's full to bursting and the vast majority are all pretty much alike until they hit 18.

One doesn't though. one must...never...be antinatalist, otherwise one is the devil incarnate!

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 16:24:10

What's been deleted? What the fuck's going on?? I demand to know.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:24:19

<mourns the list>

I feel so bad about fucking it now. A bit dirty.

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:24:40

Deputy List Manager Mme Lindor!

Kindly step into List Manager Vermicious' Footgloves. If you please.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:25:10

I am Margot in the Good Life. I luff her.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:25:37

footgloves arf

Maryz Fri 21-Oct-11 16:26:03

I'm beginning to catch up Hully....

Can I state that I am 49 years old, and happy to be completely pointless, apart from cooking, washing and taxi-driving. In fact my kids wouldn't notice if I disappeared (as long as I arranged a weekly Tesco delivery) until they ran out of clean clothes.

I'm going on the batter out for a meal one night next week though, and I'm considering booking myself a holiday without telling them (and seeing if they notice).

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:26:18

<shouts> Mme Lindor! She's prolly folding her woollens.
We'll need clean pop sox for the Footgloves.

MadameWooOOoovary Fri 21-Oct-11 16:27:11

Why has no-one mentioned oilcloth bookbags with prints of Van Gogh's sunflowers or somesuch? The print is always really wan and the colour of the fabric is always a dull beigey teal drabness.
Oh and 4711 cologne.
And a stale biscuitty-type smell (the stage before the smell of wee)

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 16:28:06

Can anyone hear me - what's been deleted??

Hullygully Fri 21-Oct-11 16:29:22

No you are in disgrace for your earlier anarchic outside the list antics.

Hah!

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:29:35

Pinot, somebody decided to make a thread comparing this thread's 'ageism' to racism. It didn't go down very well...

grovel Fri 21-Oct-11 16:29:40

I think there might be a middle-aged person trying to contact us. Pointless listening to her really.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:29:50

Proud - fred about a fred. Ayeboo to think black people are pointless. To make the point that we're ageist and sexist.

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:29:50

I bought some cheap rip-off M&S versions of Fitflops yesteerday. That must mean I have special MAW status, surely?

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:30:38

Well, not cheap exactly, just cheap^er^.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:30:50

Are you buff yet Fellatio? Pert of sitting-nork?

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:30:54

Fuck it

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:30:58

I still don't know what fitflops are. sad

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:31:17

See Pinot? I'm a lost cause. grin

ConstanceTenchOfZombies Fri 21-Oct-11 16:31:20

Oh gawd - I am middle aged but it's only just dawned on me, thanks Hully angry

I only feel about 25 though so I suppose it doesn't really matter....

I have been opting for a pot of tea instead of coffee in Starbucks though hmm

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:31:47

Verm you mixed me up with proudnscary then I think.

that'll be the MA <nods sagely>

AnnetteProfit Fri 21-Oct-11 16:32:37

i think this is rather sad.
we have enough shit telling us how pointless we are without us agreeing fgs

yes i have left sense of humour at the door

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:32:45

ahaha Fell <pats arm kindly>

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:33:00

Buff? Unless that is an abreviation of Buffalo, then no, sadly not. Did work on the tan a bit today though. I'm trying to get all leathery just to make Hully happy. They don't seel slimline tonic here either, so I am going to get very very fat, what with all that gin I drink.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:33:01

Ah, sorry. Yes, I blame middle age. Or even the middle ages.

TheVermiciousKnid Fri 21-Oct-11 16:33:27

Actually, I usually blame Thatcher. Could I do that in this case?

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:33:33

shurrup fishy

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:35:06

slimline tonic is evil anyway. You're better off.

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:35:49

AnnetteProfit you are obviously an accountant with a name like that, and we all know that accountants are boring with no sense of humour. Come on girl, loosen up. See the funny side.

Proudnscary Fri 21-Oct-11 16:36:12

Ohhhh thank you Sue. That's ridiculous times a million (the thread not the deletion of said thread...did this other thread have a list? Never mind let's not discuss the other thread or this thread might be deleted for mentioning the other thread)

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:36:35

Classic MA :-

Having a coffee in MaccyD's whilst the kids have a burger meal

OR WORSE

Having a Filet'o'fish <shudders>

FellatioNelson Fri 21-Oct-11 16:37:43

I used to love Filets o' fish when I was a kid. And I loved cabbage at school dinners. I am not normal.

ConstanceTenchOfZombies Fri 21-Oct-11 16:38:34

How very dare you! Accountants are almost as exciting as actuaries I'll have you know

<swings handbag at fellatio>

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses Fri 21-Oct-11 16:39:40

I always have a coffee in McDs. I say always - I've been once in the last 18 months or so. I like places with cake.

PinotScreechio Fri 21-Oct-11 16:39:43

Verm - Fitflops are the best thing for your feet. Comfort-a-go-go. I have a squillion pairs, incl boots. Not sexy, not cool, but heaven for the wide-of-hoof like moi.

<ignores Fell's weirdness>

ConstanceTenchOfZombies Fri 21-Oct-11 16:41:50