The Least Professional Moments of My Illustrious Career - Please Feel Free to Add Your Own

(555 Posts)
MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 14:58:34

Please reassure me I am not the only one to behave less than professionally occasionally. So far I have:

Called my boss 'Dad'.

I stood up in front of a major customer's supplier quality improvement conference and informed them, 40 other companies, and my boss ('Dad')that "Quality Improvement programs usually come in steps - ours is a 12 step program".

I started a new role in my company, went to a conference with representatives from all the company sites who were now relying on me to ensure the correct products reach them with the correct test reports, labels and packaging. I introducted myself by saying "Good morning, my name is Angela Hernandez". 30 faces went hmm and a voice from the back went "No, it isn't". The real Angela Hernandez (our Quality Director), known to them all for the past 25 years looked very confused as to why I was apparently trying to impersonate her. Not so confused as I looked, obviously.

janeite Wed 19-Nov-08 15:04:22

Lol. Fantastic!

The head teacher once walked into the staffroom years ago, to find me on the floor, up to my elbows in fake blood, with a bloody and torn sheet spread out in front of me. I just said "Oh don't worry: the republic is safe now" and carried on tearing the sheet.

I've done the name thing before too.

TrillianA Wed 19-Nov-08 15:04:45


I'm Angela Hernandez, and so's my wife.

littlelapin Wed 19-Nov-08 15:10:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

quint Wed 19-Nov-08 15:10:54

No I'm Angela Hernandez

quint Wed 19-Nov-08 15:11:50

OK I have to go now - this is the 2nd thread thats made me cry with laughter. I think I may need to get out more

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:12:02

janeite, did the teacher back slowly out of the room?

I was wearing a floaty dress to work one windy day. I was carrying a huge armful of manufacturing records across the site when the wind caught my skirt and blew it clean over my head in the alleyway between the Maintenance Department and the Men's Locker Room 5 minutes before shift change. A true quality professional would have gripped onto those manufacturing records like grim death and to hell with letting every male in the place see my knickers and thigh highs. As my heart is really in engineering I dropped the batch tickets and adjusted the skirt. The Site Engineer appeared about 2 seconds later. We spent the next half hour chasing manufacturing records across the Mojave desert.

Blinglovin Wed 19-Nov-08 15:13:35

LOL Littlelapin. I was once sat in a meeting with various senior people and a journalist and one of the VIPs started nodding off. It was horrible. And I was too far away to wake him up. Luckily the journalist didn't notice, but the other PR person and I were struggling not to laugh and/or cry throughout the presentation!

Kathyis6incheshigh Wed 19-Nov-08 15:14:05

I was invited to give a paper at the Ministry of Culture in Madrid and I had to cancel at the last minute because I'd lost my passport blush

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:14:29

The 12 step program comment wouldn't have been so bad if my boss and I hadn't trawled about every bar in the city the night before, we were on a business trip. I think it was a Freudian slip myself.

Kally Wed 19-Nov-08 15:15:11

My boss had just had a very fine antique table 'french polished' (whatever that is, I thought it was for nails) anyway, it cost him an arm and a leg.
I made him a cup of tea and put it on his table...
He tore me apart very unprofessionally infront of everyone.
He beat about the bush so much and was so redfaced I didn't know what he was beefing about. Then he said ' I'm talking about the tea you put on my table!' and I said 'wasn't it sugared?'...

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:15:15

LOL littlelapin.

UnquietDad Wed 19-Nov-08 15:15:29

Am I thick? I don't get the 12-step program one.

cornsilk Wed 19-Nov-08 15:15:34

I went to school with 2 0dd boots on. The children all noticed in assembly.

milkysallgone Wed 19-Nov-08 15:16:01


HowardMoon Wed 19-Nov-08 15:16:10

I once farted whilst standing in a quiet corridor showing a new member of staff around the building. It was loud and unannounced. I paused momentarily and having assessed the situation, carried on as if nothing had happened...

janeite Wed 19-Nov-08 15:16:24

She certainly did. But the look of alarm on her face was worse when she found me in the corridor lying down pretending to be dead, whilst I waited for Year 8 to line up and shut up. It worked though!

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:17:12

I have posted this before, but I sat in a meeting to hear about a new project I was going to be working on. I was told to contact an American Engineer. I misheard his name as being Randy Beaver. I spent the next hour or so pretending to cough. There were only 3 of us in the meeting, I think they noticed.

snigger Wed 19-Nov-08 15:17:22

Once arrived late in the midst of a cycling-to-work health drive, gasped down a can of Coke (so much for the health drive), answered the urgently ringing phone with a 'from the depths of hell' resonating belch, and hung up.

UnquietDad Wed 19-Nov-08 15:17:56

There is a Randy Bender who works for Novell.

bythepowerofgreyskull Wed 19-Nov-08 15:18:48

my very first business lunch.. with very important potential client.. I ordered pasta and slopped on my blouse.. I was soo embarrassed - felt like a child - but somehow managed to get the contract smile I think they took pity on me!

taralee Wed 19-Nov-08 15:19:03

thank you for making my day. grin

No I'M Angela Hernandez!

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:19:28

The 12 step program is what alcholics use to get back to sobriety UnquietDad.

PerkinWarbeck Wed 19-Nov-08 15:20:07

I was presenting a report to a tribunal. Everyone else had met the chair on previous occasions, so I was the only one who involuntarily snorted as she introduced herself as "Mrs. Gaylord".

MadamDeathstare Wed 19-Nov-08 15:20:19

It wasn't him UnquietDad. Poor man, that name would be fine in the US.

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