Netmums Sty-lee thread: Add your ticker here!

(346 Posts)
morningpaper Wed 23-May-07 20:14:41

So let's chat and add our tickers. First person to say the word "arse" is disqualified.

How was your day?

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BABY NO 1 is FOUR YEARS and 245 days old
BABY NO 2 is 20 months and 12 days old

It has been 45 HOURS since I was last chased out of town with a PITCHFORK

I last OVULATED 3 days ago

It has been FOUR MONTHS since I last cleaned my Mooncup properly

<INSERT LARGE YELLOW RIBBON PICTURE HERE>

<INSERT PICTURE OF ME LOOKING FAT AND OLD TAKEN WITH MY WEBCAM HERE>

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Flumpybumpy Fri 25-May-07 22:09:53

maganes wtf?????????

Flumpybumpy Fri 25-May-07 22:09:26

Just popped over but apart from now having stupid sparkly spot sin front of my eyes, I didn't have a farking clue how to get on to a board let alone how to post.

If anyone maganes it add a parp from me

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3 minutes since I finished the wine

5 minutes since I finished the choc

1 minute since I reached for the headache tablets after visiting NM

I think we should all head over there en masse and then pointedly parp and leave.

A mass parping if you will

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Someone Special
Someone Dear
Someone New
To Love Is Here!
WE HAVE A NEW COCKROACH
born on FRIDAY
at 10:23
HIS NAME IS FRED
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our hard shelled lump-o-love

Flumpybumpy Fri 25-May-07 21:45:23

What would we say if they did start a 'NM temporary members thread' How funny would that be Oooo I wish they would .

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2 mins since my last slug wine

5 mins since my last chuck of choc

BellaBear Fri 25-May-07 21:41:32

lol

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I'm waiting for a baby.....
I'm wishing for ten tiny fingers
and ten tiny toes
Sprinkle babydust over me
and wish me luck
heart.heart,heart,heart
.gif pregnant tummy

divastrop Fri 25-May-07 21:37:29

you are cheeky WHOMOVEDMYCHOCOLATE-i was worried your pic would steam up my rose-coloured specs!<animated blushing bunny rabbit>
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DAY 35 of 28 day cycle

i am currently:INSANE

i have been drinking:LOTS OF GIN

<huge photo of 17 ugly children and a cat with clothes on>

akaJamiesMum Fri 25-May-07 21:06:14

You evil beggers.

akaJamiesMum Fri 25-May-07 21:05:56

Beansprout - support your view hon. After all, what will they whiten their coffee with, it's not like they can use cows right. They are sacred aint they?

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.gif - clouds
.gif - head
.gif - in

Evening lovies. Well it has been a lovely day taking care of my enormous cock but it's so lovely to come home and settle down with my friends here. Big hugs!

Am sprinkling baby dust around for those who want it.

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It has been 34 minutes since my last Prozac pill.

I haven't bought a new twinset in 2 weeks.

My chuff smells of lilacs.

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Insert .gif of cross eyed kitten.

lolol

How are you all today huns?
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FIVE HOURS 22 MINUTES since I left dd at nursery to come to work

FIVE HOURS 4 MINUTES since I actually did any work

TWENTY HOURS 3 MINUTES to go before my lungs burst halfway up a big hill (why did I say I would do it????)
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[insert pic of dd with her name underneath so's I can remember what she looks like]

CheesyFeet Fri 25-May-07 14:03:19

I have just found this thread thanks to the adorable morningpaper's fantastic roundup and it's just so lovely I really felt I ought to resurrect it and share the fluffiness with you all




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3 hours 41 mins since I last read a thread that made me want to vom

2 mins 40 secs until I look around the kitchen for something nice to eat. Again.

<insert picture of dd concentrating very hard and turning red as she is pushing out a particularly large poo>

harrisey Fri 25-May-07 13:57:19

<<snort>>

I've just been asked to stop laughing or leave the college library!!


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**25 seconds since I offended a librarian*
*
2 minutes since i snorted fizzy water down my nose all over the desk*
*
1 minute since I ran out of hankies to mop up the mess*
*
I am going NOW**

beansprout Fri 25-May-07 12:55:08

I think Nescafe make lovely coffee. If people in poor countries want to buy formula, it's up to them!!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

18 hours since I last had it up the arse.

9 hours until dh and I go dogging

<< pic of leedle puppy with hat on >>

MellowMa Fri 25-May-07 12:51:32

Message withdrawn

MellowMa Fri 25-May-07 12:50:19

Message withdrawn

lummox Fri 25-May-07 12:39:10

Hi all. I'm new here, and I like to ranDomly Capitalise WORDS.
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It is 4 HOURS since I took advice from my solicitor about this thread.

It will be 5 DAYS before morningpaper receives my letter before action.

My draft Particulars of Claim contain 73 DIFFERENT ALLEGATIONS of holding my avatar up to ridicule and contempt.

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<picture of the late Peter Carter-Ruck hugging my ds2>

SpringBunny Fri 25-May-07 12:30:47

hello I'm new here, feeling all fluffy and pink but not sure I will be welcome as i am a WOHM?
But I do a full cooked breakfast for my little ones, put a casserole in the slow cooker for tea and clean the house before I go to work (for charidee helping underprivileged young people of course).

Oh and I went to ds assembly at school this morning - oh huns it was sooo sweet.

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<picture of ds and dd looking cute and cuddly>

TARGET WEIGHT 8st 7 lbs

WEIGHT LOSS TO GO TO TARGET 12 stone

<fuzzy picture of dh, me and dc's gazing adorably at each other>

<pink sparkly picture of cute kitten wearing yellow ribbon>

LieselVentouse Fri 25-May-07 10:06:39

V. funny - my boss so knows Im not working

trendaverter Fri 25-May-07 09:25:06

This thread just made my day

cya l8r huns! xxoxxxxoxxxoxxxxxxxoxxpxxxxxxox

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3 MINUTES since I last blew my nose
7 MINUTES since I last laughed so hard a bit of wee came out
3 WEEKS since I last got laid
8 MONTHS since I looked at the 2 little blue lines on the stcik and said 'Oh Shit'
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<<insert soft focus heavily edited photo of self looking a bit like a porn star taken when I was 20>>

Morning all. I had a delightful night's sleep. It's so wonderful to have a baby play chopsticks on your ribs all night. And DHs snoring is like fairy panpipes in my ears...

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4 minutes 31 seconds since my boobies last leaked

3 mins 47 secs since my last cup of tea

3 mins 30 secs since used booby leakage for cup of tea as out of milk

I have put on 340lbs of baby weight

4 weeks, 27 days and 20 seconds since I last watered my plants

2 hours and 31 seconds since my last credit card refusal

<<insert huge gif of baby scan photo s you have to scroll half way down the page each time I post the tiniest message>>

nannyogg Fri 25-May-07 07:39:51

Good morning all you lovely ladies. (((hugs for everyone)) Well it's half seven and I've already done the washing, ironing, made the beds, hoovered the house from top to bottom, deloused the cat, wormed the dog and cleaned out the rabbit hutch. phew! Think I need a cuppa! Hope you're all feeling fluffy and sparkly and happy - TGIF!

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It's been - one week since you looked at me, cocked your head to the side and said 'I'm angry'

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<picture of a fairy sat on a toadstool looking glum>

SpringBunny Thu 24-May-07 23:40:02

Oh huns daahhling, so nice to see you again ((((hugs)))) you were so helpful when you ** my dh

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bunny kittten is 5yrs, 11 months, 4days and 52 mins old <cute picture of fairy with fluffy wings>

cuddly boy is 4 years, 6 months 15 days and 13 mins old <cute picture of boy on tractor in middle of crocodile.gif>

2 DAYS since bunny kitten 1 wet the bed (pink sparkly fireworks)

^^^32 MINS since cat brought in petrified frog^^^

:::::31 MINS since dh rudely woken by screaming wife:::::

***30 MINS since frog (and cat) removed and peace regined***

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WK007 Thu 24-May-07 23:19:57

4 minutes since I last stroked dd's hair

2.5 hours since I last ate

10 months since I got divorced

9 months since I last worked (have been at college btw, not lazing about!)

3 years and 11 months since dd was a one day old baby in my arms

And too long since I last had sex

rhubarb90 Thu 24-May-07 20:41:48

LMAO DS has just come in asking what I'm cackling at.

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