is this the worst and most self-absorbed piece of journalism ever written? (most amusing)

(454 Posts)
whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney Wed 13-Dec-06 23:12:00

Without a word of a lie, this was printed in The Evening Standard the other day after the tornado. A friend of mine has picked it up and thinks it's worth celebrating in all its pompous, un-self-aware, London meeja whore bourgeois pig awfulness. it's not a piss-take. really it isn't.

"My tornado hell. This is to celebrate and remember the excellent article by freelance writer Caroline Phillips from the Evening Standard. When it was printed is irrelevant, the point is to keep it alive forever, long after the last landfill has rotted away, we are all dust, and your children's children's children may revel in the words contained herein." here

QuootiepiesChristmasName Wed 13-Dec-06 23:14:27

Got one

moondog Wed 13-Dec-06 23:16:42

Good god that is hilarious!!!

Guffawing helplessly at Douschka the dog.

Silly bitch.

thewoodlandfairy Wed 13-Dec-06 23:17:12

it truly is astonishing

Wilbur Wed 13-Dec-06 23:18:01

I love the bit about her clementines being vomited across the kitchen floor...

Twiglett Wed 13-Dec-06 23:18:19

I can't read it .. my brain melted on the first paragraph

weepootleflump Wed 13-Dec-06 23:20:02

OMG! Do you think she's a MNer?

EmkanaCookTurkeyLikeICan Wed 13-Dec-06 23:22:27

You must read it to the end - otherwise you miss out on the Cath Kidston carpet in the nine year old's bedroom.

2nervesnapartridgeinapeartree Wed 13-Dec-06 23:23:05

Really not a piss take??

The bit about the firemen admiring her polished plaster walls?

EmkanaCookTurkeyLikeICan Wed 13-Dec-06 23:23:14

Oh and the husband saying to the insurance bloke, after being offered to stay in a hotel, "There is only one hotel in London - Claridge's"


moondog Wed 13-Dec-06 23:24:42

I can't believe it actually.

It makes me want to start a revolution.She will be firstup for the firing squad.

It's so vacuous and self indulgent.

Reading it encapsulates all that is wrong and greedy.

SantasFattymumma Wed 13-Dec-06 23:25:03

i got about half way and couldn't go on.

What a pretentious twunt.
i love the way she name drops and has to give everyones jobs just so that we knoe her freinds are all "nice people"

glad her house is wrecked, she can now recreater her "passion for perfect decor"

doyouwantfrankincensewiththat Wed 13-Dec-06 23:25:54

huzzah the cat's OK

do Claridges take cats?

weepootleflump Wed 13-Dec-06 23:30:14

Had to go back and finish, just for the Cath Kidston reference - superb!

whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney Wed 13-Dec-06 23:30:25

i feel very sorry for Beryl... i don't think she was even a film producer.

DeckthehallsLaDiDaDi Wed 13-Dec-06 23:30:58

I can't believe that she got that pile of namedropping crap printed.

NattyandThomasandBumpandSanta Wed 13-Dec-06 23:34:25

my goodness, shes full of it... such a shame to have oranges vomited on ur floor.. as if the birthday cards on the shelf wernt enough... reminds me of the catherine tate sketches
"oh mummy.."

posh cow

Judd Wed 13-Dec-06 23:34:37

I looked around our house and smirked at "I feared looting".

wickedwinterwitch Wed 13-Dec-06 23:36:50

<snort snort>

moondog Wed 13-Dec-06 23:39:22

Beryl was the token working class brick i think.

Born and bred there hence astonishing scenario of a charlady (retd.) rubbing shoulders with film producers and the like.

myrrhthamoo Wed 13-Dec-06 23:39:22

Oh. I am utterly lost for words. There is so much to pick at in that I don't even know where to start. She just cannot be for real...tell me it's a wind up...

wickedwinterwitch Wed 13-Dec-06 23:40:29

"I was standing thinking How Can I Write About This? How soon can I get my copy in? And as I surveyed my friend's Imac, I knew the answer was soon. Because you all deserve to know what it's like to be middle class and devastated."

myrrhthamoo Wed 13-Dec-06 23:41:06

In the midst of such angst, such devastation, such loss...she still makes the point that it's an 'American walnut floating shelf.' God forbid we should think it was just any old shelf...from Argos or B&Q maybe.

doyouwantfrankincensewiththat Wed 13-Dec-06 23:41:07

she may find she gets used to post-tornado minimum maintenance darling

ClementClarkeMoore Wed 13-Dec-06 23:41:35

Unctuous buggar

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