To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

(993 Posts)
doubleshotespresso Wed 12-Jun-13 23:38:24

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

ChasedByBees Thu 13-Jun-13 00:01:00

Hilarious! grin

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:01:18

Ok so we have not over-reacted-was just checking! Thanks for the reassurance and cerealqueen that is so funny.

Our problem is that the father of the baby frequently does contracting work on projects with DP. If we do not attend I think we would be very much offending them. They have been very generous to my stepchildren over the years, Birthdays etc....

But I have to say it would be through gritted teeth if we did go which goes against our principles too....

Am going to sleep on it....confused

Scruffey Thu 13-Jun-13 00:01:22

If you want to continue the friendship, I think a photo album from their list is the best thing to go with. Other stuff sounds grabby, photo album is reasonable. It does sound shocking and Yanbu to be miffed!

If you don't value or wish to continue with the friendship, you could just decline the invite.

hortensemancini Thu 13-Jun-13 00:03:35

So, effectively, they're having the baby christened in the Church of St John and St Lewis, rather than the usual Church of England? Class!

LittleTyga Thu 13-Jun-13 00:04:50

Send it back and demand a poem - tell her you couldn't possibly take this seriously without a tacky poem - really some people!

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:05:49

scruffey we have shared holidays, kids parties, house moves, seriously years..... They have never ever before demonstrated such grabby,crass and frankly rude traits...

DP just made the observation (&pls forgive his snobbery!) that they are lovely people, but they do not really know what they are doing when it comes to these things..... Not really convinced of this, their wedding was immaculate, though they (she I suppose) had a very expensive wedding planner. It was classy,beautiful and a very fun day, with no pretentious touches.

We are baffled!

LazyMonkeyButler Thu 13-Jun-13 00:08:02

How rude and grabby can you be? shock

I would go though, just to see the look on the parents' faces when you hand over your silver cutlery set (as is more normal at these events) grin.

Out of interest, is there anything for the father on the gift list? A set of golf clubs perhaps? I am truly intrigued as to why the mother thinks it is reasonable to ask for expensive gifts to celebrate her naming her baby.

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 00:08:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhiteBirdBlueSky Thu 13-Jun-13 00:09:28

She's been very bad mannered, but if she's been v generous to your DSCs then I would just suck it up so as not to appear just as rude. Or ignore and take a gift for the baby.

LazyMonkeyButler Thu 13-Jun-13 00:11:12

Actually scruffey yes, I would expect the couple to be receiving a lot of photo albums (as it would appear to be the only appropriate gift on the list).

Scruffey Thu 13-Jun-13 00:12:05

In that case, give them a free pass for this one piece of bad behaviour, take a photo album and continue the friendship. Reconsider if such things continue!

OutragedFromLeeds Thu 13-Jun-13 00:12:37

I'd go, but completely ignore the gift list. Bloody cheek. Could it be some sort of post-natal madness? Really extreme PFBitis?

PunkHedgehog Thu 13-Jun-13 00:13:04

If you know them that well can you ring them up and say 'v funny joke, we thought it was hilarious, but aren't you worried that some people will be offended?'. Or just tell them straight out they are being daft.

Failing that do, or don't go, but ignore the list. If they've been generous to your kids over the years then it's reasonable to return the favour, but with mothercare vouchers, a donation to a child trust fund, a set of nicely bound Pooh Bear books, or something along those lines.

MidniteScribbler Thu 13-Jun-13 00:13:38

I would just buy something for the baby as is traditional. Gift lists are a suggestion, not a demand.

MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik Thu 13-Jun-13 00:14:19

Would you not be tempted to ring them and tell them that someone's OTT wedding list must've fallen into your envelope?!

Obviously you won't, but, wow ...

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:26:33

These responses are exactly what I had hoped for thank-you all!

No mention of gifts for the father no....

I had actually already purchased a little gift for the baby just because it caught my eye and I knew this was due.... But thinking a silver bangle engraved with Twinkle twinkle little star and lovely Beatrix Potter "my first library" set with it's own nursery shelf perhaps won't cut it now....

We have just realised that the gift list has considerable price gaps. Nothing listed costing between £38.99 and £75! Yikes

Gossipmonster Thu 13-Jun-13 00:27:28

Is it Coleen Rooney?

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:28:13

My Mum just suggested John Lewis vouchers if we do go, as she was incandescent when I explained all this on the phone!

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:30:10

gossip not Coleen Rooney no. Far from it. She is no WAG. Though maybe she does have aspirations in that direction-the whole thing is so different to how I would welcome a baby to the world but hey...

fuckingscabies Thu 13-Jun-13 00:35:13

Yabu. She pushed that baby out of her foofoo and deserves treasure and riches.

cantspel Thu 13-Jun-13 00:35:25

Can you not find away to get out of going. Something that is convincing and wont cause offense?

Maybe break your husbands leg or something similar?

IAgreeCompletely Thu 13-Jun-13 00:35:44

I know it is not meant to matter but are your friends going to be providing everyone with a sumptuous meal and endless drinks? If they are spending £50 a head or more then perhaps they don't think they are being grabby by asking for 'stuff'

Obviously they would be wrong to think this but it might go some way in explaining why they have done this.

fuckingscabies Thu 13-Jun-13 00:36:01

Only joking - what the actual FUCK?

Post this thread on your Facebook - should give her the message.

mamadoc Thu 13-Jun-13 00:39:12

Thank you, dear friends, for your kind invitation
To the naming of this blessed child, the pride of our nation
And as for his mother, who gave him birth,
A Jo Malone candle is the least that she's worth!
But since we're a tiny bit skint at the mo'
A packet of Pom Bears will just have to do!

doubleshotespresso Thu 13-Jun-13 00:40:12

fuckingscabies so wish I had the nerve!!!

iagree apparently the ceremony is to be followed by a hot fork buffet and we are guessing guests will be expected to pay for drinks from the bar...

There will be a soft play area set up and a band...... All in a swanky hotel...

The more I think about this the more creative I become with elaborate excuses not to go. Hmmmmm

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now