Have you ever encountered anyone this cheeky?

(587 Posts)

Inspired roughly by a couple of threads recently...
I used to have a friend (used to being the operative) who would come round to my house to smoke. Her reason being that she didn't want her house to smell like smoke and she didn't like smoking in the street as she thought it looked 'common' (her words)

The punchline being that I didn't smoke
That friendship ended when I saw the light and realised that she was using me! She was happy enough to make my house stink and I was too polite (at the time) to ask her not to as I thought I was being a welcoming host.

Has anyone encountered anyone with more brass neck than that?

insanityscratching Mon 22-Apr-13 13:48:26

How could I forget my stepmother, df died leaving her very well provided for (he was the managing director of a very successful company) a huge detached house, a couple of cars, lump sum and a very generous pension. My GM outlived him but at the time of his death was in a nursing home.
Df paid an allowance to his DM so that she could have little luxuries, buy herself new clothes etc. When df died my stepmother stopped the allowance saying there had to be cutbacks now she didn't have df's salary which was laughable as the pension and lump sum would have covered df's salary and the house was mortgage free.
Then she really outdid herself when GM died and she refused to pay for the funeral even though it was df's wish that it was paid for from his estate (dh and I funded the funeral bill) but she turned up and demanded that she lead the mourners into church.
Mind you we should have expected it really as she wanted to sell df's belongings to me and my brothers and sisters when we asked for something to remember him by.

gallifrey Mon 22-Apr-13 13:54:53

These remind me of my best friend's SIL who sold them her buggy when she had a baby then asked for it back when her friend had a baby and just took it and didn't offer them any money even though she had made them pay top second hand price for it!

hollyisalovelyname Mon 22-Apr-13 14:01:18

Some of these people remind me of the Caroline Ahearne character in The Royale Family grin

StealthOfficialCrispTester Mon 22-Apr-13 14:07:56

That is so so sad insanity.

bran Mon 22-Apr-13 14:14:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StealthOfficialCrispTester Mon 22-Apr-13 14:20:57

shock
and another shock for good measure

bran Mon 22-Apr-13 14:27:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tigerlilygrr Mon 22-Apr-13 14:47:04

Oh I have thought of another one! I can't believe this slipped my mind...

A few years ago a middle-aged neighbour turned up to a quiet family event, completely uninvited. He was clearly rip roaringly drunk but as the person who answered the door wasn't sure if he'd been invited, they let him in anyway. First of all he got stuck into the booze. Then he cornered one of the family to explain at great length, with added swearing and gesticulation, just why it was he'd lost his job recently. Then he tried it on with the (teenage) girlfriend of one of the family. Then he resisted all attempts to get him to leave, so had to be physically ejected by four burly men.

All of this would be pretty cheeky for a house party. However it was not a house party....

It was a wake.

AlistairSim Mon 22-Apr-13 14:49:46

This is the best thread ever.

gallifrey Mon 22-Apr-13 15:41:07

It is!
Still can't believe the utter gall of some people !

lisac99 Mon 22-Apr-13 15:52:13

I used to have a friend (note the ‘used to’) who was so, so tight it was painful.

I was a student between 18 and 24 and she dropped out of school at 17 and started working. I had a research grant for my Postgrad which I could live on, but she earnt more than me…. She used to always do certain ‘tricks’ to ensure that I paid for her and as I was a total mug / idiot / stupid cretin, I let her get away with it for years, for example:

1.Whenever we ‘caught up’ and went to a coffee shop, she’d let me walk in the door first which meant I was in the queue first so inevitably, I would ask her ‘What do you want?’ and be the one to pay for it.

2.She had money issues so wasn’t allowed a credit card or a debit card – she could only use cash, and when we’d go out for (cheap) meals, she’d say ‘Oh, I don’t have any money on me, I’ll have to pay you back’ when the bill came… which meant I’d pay for the meal and she’d never pay me back. (Yes, I needed to grow a backbone but I hated and still do hate asking friends for money)

3.She’d always work out exactly how much she owed, so on the rare occasion she actually did pay her way, she’d pay for exactly what she’d had and nothing more. To save embarrassment, I’d always put 10% in for a tip as I felt it wasn’t the waiter / waitresses fault that my friend was tight.

4.She’s always have an excuse as to why she couldn’t drive, meaning that I would use my petrol to drive us around places and she’d never offer petrol money.

When I graduated and started earning more money than her, she used to say to me ‘Oh, you earn more than me, so you can pay’ and then she went to Uni to do an HND at the age of 27, so then it was ‘Oh, I’m a student and you earn loads so you can pay’…..

… Yes, I did FINALLY develop a backbone after buying Take That tickets for myself and her….. I bought them a good 4 months before the concert. She didn’t pay me back before, we went to the concert together.. she still didn’t pay me back and something just snapped inside me, so I asked her for the money. She pleaded poverty, and then I saw on Facebook she was ‘bored of revision so had gone shopping instead’. So, the next time we met up, we went for a meal and she did the whole ‘Oh, can you pay and I’ll pay you back?’ lark, I said no… I only had cash, I didn’t have my wallet’ and she went white. I said I’d pay for my half and she could sort her own half out… she was really scared – turns out she had no cash on her, nor any in the bank. I asked her why she thought it was acceptable to do this to me and she said ‘But you’ve always paid’ (serves me right, I was such a wimp) and I said no more… that I wanted the money for the Take That Tickets and she would have to sort her 50% of the meal out…. Paid my 50% to the waiter and walked out the restaurant.

The thing that really got me was the fact that as a student or someone who doesn’t earn lots, I was always really aware that you don’t want to go to ‘fancy’ places and sometimes eating a sarnie at home is better than going out to eat – I ALWAYS suggested we eat at our homes, rather than go to places as didn’t want to pressure her into spending money she didn’t have…. But she always said it was fine going out (well, duh.. as I was the one paying!)

There’s a bigger back story with her – when we were both 17, I had had a boyfriend for 2 years (first love and all that). It turns out that my boyfriend always preferred her and they were sleeping together behind my back. I found out, we split and she dated him for 2 years…. Only to get pregnant, have an abortion, her Mother found out and as she was strongly pro life, she kicked my friend out the house, hence why my friend dropped out of A levels and had to get a job , getting herself into debt etc. Apparently the first words out of my exes mouth after my friend had the abortion was ‘So how long until we can have sex?’ – I was devastated when I found out that one of my best friends was sleeping with my boyfriend but years on, God, I dodged a bullet!!!! Funnily enough, he ended up cheating on her with her Boss – he used to ‘pop in the shop’ to say hello to my friend, but it was actually the Boss he wanted to see.

When I found out about them, I stopped talking to her for 5 years, but after she dumped him and re-started her life, she contacted me through a mutual friend, begging forgiveness and I, like an idiot… forgave her.

RunRabbit Mon 22-Apr-13 15:52:32

This thread is like a car crash.

These things are so terrible but I can't tear my eyes away shock

RunRabbit Mon 22-Apr-13 15:56:55

Lisa How did she get out of paying for her meal?

I am loving these cheeky fuckers! Mine's mild in comparison.

My uncle's wife is only a few years older than me and they have two small children. She works 2 days a week. My mum picks them up from school one day, DAunt's mum the other. One week her mum was on holiday so my mum did both days. DAunt did not appreciate her mum taking term time holidays so told my mum "I told her to shove her childcare! So you'll be doing both days from now on!" My mum does too. DA was less than impressed when I announced my pregnancy, she asked what she'd do for childcare now if DM had my kid. First thing out of her mouth!

She also repeatedly badgered me about offered me their old cot and I sent DP to collect it. she shoved a bin bag full of completely broken toys in despite being told repeatedly I didn't want them. She also told DP I wanted him to collect her old mattress, which I'd refused on the basis it'd been used twice and stored in the loft for a couple of years. Luckily he was with me when I ordered the new one so checked with me. The response? Well I thought you could just take them to the tip while you're off. Yep nothing 8 month pregnant women love more than carrying mattresses around tips. That's what maternity leave's for.

StealthOfficialCrispTester Mon 22-Apr-13 16:13:16

lisa, what did she do when you walked ot of the restaurant?

EccentricElastic Mon 22-Apr-13 16:17:20

lisac99 what a parasitic 'friend'! Did she get out of paying then, or did she have a lot of washing up to do? grin

I must point out that this thread is disturbingly addictive. I have been trying to prep work for tomorrow, and what should normally take half an hour tops, is still work - in - progressshock ha!

I woke up to squealing noises outside my bedroom window at 7am on a bank holiday. Looked in the garden and found that next door neighbour's kids were playing on our trampoline, and ndn was standing there, fondly watching them! She had unbolted our side gate and let her dch in our back garden!

EccentricElastic Mon 22-Apr-13 16:23:16

..........and I started at around 11 this morning!!!

lisac99 Mon 22-Apr-13 16:27:49

‘Friend’ was gobsmacked when I started putting my coat on, but I really was just ‘Grrrr’ by that point (I think this had been going on for a good, what? 7 years at this point, so was well overdue). Funnily enough, I DID get the money back for the Take That tickets the week after – she emailed me (as I was ignoring her texts and calls) and told me that she had had to phone her parents (Dad is retired, Mother works as a cleaner so not a lot of spare cash) to do an emergency bank transfer so that she could have money in her account to pay for the meal. I don’t actually know if she was able to get the money that night, or whether she had to go back the next day when the money was in her account, but either way, she told me that she got her parents to transfer cash over to her.

Thing was, she was apparently £250 ‘over’ her agreed overdraft (which is stupid as I thought if you had cash issues, you weren’t allowed to go over your overdraft?) maybe it was because she was a student… So her parents had to put in £265 so she could pay £15 for the meal!

She and I had a big ‘heart to heart’, she apologised, admitted she was jealous as my life had turned out ‘so much better than hers’ and that she had used the fact I didn’t like confrontation to take the piss big time.

She said it wouldn’t happen again and that she would always pay her way – I was like ‘OK, fine, whatever’. I used to work as an IT Consultant so was working 150 miles away from home and she went to the Uni in the same place that I was working, so actually it was handy to have someone to ‘do stuff with’ in the weekday evenings as I didn’t get on with a lot of work colleagues and didn’t have any friends living in the area.

I actually stuck to my plan of ONLY taking out cash (well, my debit card was tucked into my jeans but she didn’t know that) so she had no choice but to pay 50% for everything. I really thought we had turned the corner, she was paying for coffees, things were going well…

She then suggested we go to the Spa that I’m a member of – you can take 2 guests and pay £50 per guest as opposed to the £120 for a day visit. She said she’d pay the £50 entry and we could go, get a treatment and have a nice day. I said fine…. I had my members card and she got a guest card which you use instead of cash / debit cards, so at the end of the day, anything you’ve bought is just on the card and you pay it off at the end.

She said to me ‘Rather than using both cards, why don’t we just use your card and I’ll pay you the £50, plus whatever food and treatments I have at the end of the day?’ I said ‘Sure, however can you give me the money now, just so I don’t forget?’ she got all funny, then admitted she didn’t have any cash on her and that she was thinking she’d pay me back ‘the next time she saw me’… I said no, that wasn’t acceptable and considering all the times before, I’d rather have the money up front. She accused me of not trusting her and ruining the day, I said I really didn’t care and if she wanted to drive to a cash point, that’s her choice but I wasn’t walking to reception with her and signing her in as a guest unless she gave me the cash beforehand (we were in the car at this point, at the spa… just ready to go in)…

She drove off….. I’ve not seen her since. That was last year.

She has tried to contact me twice on email ‘Hey! It’s been ages, do you fancy meeting up before Christmas?’ type thing, but I’ve not replied and she’s now not contacted me for over 4 months….

I finally got a backbone! grin

StealthOfficialCrispTester Mon 22-Apr-13 16:30:30

Well done grin Brilliant story

RunRabbit Mon 22-Apr-13 16:42:48

Miranda Did you say anything to them or did you let them carry on?

EccentricElastic Mon 22-Apr-13 16:44:40

Wow lisa

she wasn't going to go quietly was she!

Good for you for sticking to your principles flowers

expatinscotland Mon 22-Apr-13 16:49:04

Good for you, lisac!

Fluffycloudland77 Mon 22-Apr-13 16:49:26

lisac99, well done. She must have cost you thousands over the years.

lisac99 Mon 22-Apr-13 17:01:02

I don’t know how much she cost me, I am the first to admit that I’m quite ‘lucky’ in my career (OK, so got myself a Ph.D that I worked hard for and had the obligatory student loan!) and as I’m not married and don’t have any children, I do have a lot of disposable income.

Therefore I don’t usually care what stuff costs and I really, really do enjoy ‘treating’ friends and family to things – I am very happy to pay for things usually, but I guess it just grated on me that it was expected and when she never used to say to me ‘Oh, by the way, here’s the tenner you lent me the other day’.

Due to this ‘friend’, though.. I think I made my sisters and friends paranoid, as whenever we go anywhere and I say ‘I’ll get this’, they say ‘Oh, no, it’s my turn, after all, I don’t want to be like <insert friends name>’ and that makes me cringe and makes me wonder if I basically should have manned up years ago and just told my friend to stop taking the piss, rather than simmer with resentment for years and vent at other, totally lovely people.

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