ZOMBIE THREAD ALERT: This thread hasn't been posted on for a while.
You know you've had too many children when...(328 Posts)
You nearly have a heart attack paying for their new school uniform, then struggle to carry it all home.
That's my fear! Of course I am given to just doing things on a whim...
Ha, Cheerful, I said that when I was pregnant with #2 as well.
...There is still no #3 on the way. Turns out my first child was extraordinarily easy, and there was me thinking I was just a great parent.
Sadly, I am looking forward to all this. I have one and one on the way but I desperately want five...
I've got to add a few new ones to this thread now DS3 is 2yo. (Was CardyMow).
When your 9yo comes downstairs and asks if you should have tumble dried his pants, as they have shrunk so much they are squeezing his heart out of his mouth. You look very until you twig that he has a pair of your DS3's age 18-24 month pants on. And then you look even more wondering how the hell he managed to actually pull up pants that were 8 sizes too small...
When the pan you use for cooking pasta or potatoes is actually a
cauldron stock pot.
When cooking risotto necessitates TWO 32 inch frying pans.
When the lady in front of you in the supermarket queue asks if your DC is a fussy eater, as you have 3 bags of the same battered chicken pieces, and you look until you realise that your ONE dinner is about SIX dinners for her family...
When you have given up on clothes sizes, and find yourself telling your 9yo that he must be wearing his brother's school trousers because they are puddling over his shoes. You briefly consider going home to get him changed, then <<Shrug>> and tell him to check the labels better in the morning.
When you look at your DC's, and realise that DS1 is wearing what appears to be a crop top instead of a polo shirt, your DS2 appears to be wearing a dress instead of a polo shirt, and you herd them into the loo at school to swap polo shirts...
And still, the socks, goddammit the SOCKS.
I am drowning in a tide of odd socks. Especially now that DD, DS1 AND DS2 ALL have to wear plain black socks. And DS1 is only one shoe size smaller than DD. AND DS1 is also freaked out to the point of panic attacks at the thought of wearing anyone else's socks. Three sets of black socks, two sets in 4-7, one in 12.5-3.5. In around a month, DS2 will ALSO be in the sane sock size.
At which point, I will start to commit sockicide by buying a shredder and feeding every bastard sock into it.
And I will derive great pleasure from doing so.
Though I HAVE found a use for the never to be matched again odd socks. We DO use the shredder, shred them, and use them as hamster bedding.
I find solace in seeing the hamster pee on the remains of yet another odd sock.
<<Very weird by now...>>
when you can never ever say you feel unwell without some idiot going - "oooh are you pregnant?" grrrrr
when you have a shower and you get dressed straight from the tumble drier!
when you store clean clothes in the playpen and you have a dream that you chuck the kids in one by one and they swim around till they emerge fully clothed
when playing in the garden/going for a walk means you have to do at least one extra load of washing
when you want a swimming pool to bath them in or a jacuzzi at least.
when you fantasize about them all get married on the same day to avoid having to invite 80% of the people attending several times over
and you fantasize that they will get married to your friends kids' - same number of kids, but opposite sex, and the order is matching too!
when you want to "sort" the toys buy hiring a skip
when you stubbornly order yet another set of name tags for kid number 4, 5 , 6 but ending up using a permanent marker and write your surname only into every single item of school uniform, shoes, etc
when your DS5 goes to school and wears a school tie with DS1's name in it
when you are treated as a local celebrity at your school, and even total strangers come up to you and call you by your name!
when you realize that you are the only parent left at your kid's school, who still remembers the previous head's name over a decade ago!
when you need 2 fridges
when you have a 10-persons tent
when you just can't remember what it really was like before you had kids.
when having a trolley full of food is a quick shop
when going to the gp/ A&E is a weekly event and you question why they can't just reserve an hourly slot every Friday morning
when you've been wearing maternity/nursing bras so long a normal one looks wrong
when renewing passports puts a major dent in your budget.
when you go into labour and most midwives remember you! and you recognize them too..
oops, I meant a bath filled WITH Champagne!
I also call my children by number, and I only have three.
When you turn on Outnumbered, which everyone tells you is hilarious, but can't watch it because it feels too much like normal life.
when you are planning to have a bath filled champagne the day your youngest goes to school and you can have the whole house and 5 hours to yourself - without having to beg or pay someone to look after any of them!
Sept 2016 is not that far away!
(unless number 7 happens...)
brilliant thread, very much the same here on most things, but people still keep asking if we'll have more - so I guess 6 is not enough...
Can I be the one to solve the sock problem....? Either buy a colour per size (size 3-6 red, 6-12 blue etc etc) or stitch a coloured cross into the toe of ABSOLUTELY IDENTICAL socks (so only ever buy Tesco/primark plain black socks in whatever size, then size 3-6 red cross etc etc)
That way, (especially the second) it doesn't even matter if you end up throwing odd ones, coz you know that they are, for example, dhs size 7-11 (green cross) tescos black socks. And it saves buying new blue socks for youngest ds, even though there are perfectly functionable pink ones left from dd!!
Hope to help you sock
freaks maniacs lovers!
Math I have 3dd's and my ds does eat enough for 4
i can't see a 4th dc when 3 is such unbelievably hard work
how on earth do you all do it?!?
24 pints of milk a week.... luxury. I had to tell mine to stop drinking so much and I've got it down to 90 - 100 per week. There is a special fridge for it in the garage. The checkout staff at the nearest Sainsbury's know you by name and the kids as I often send them up to the deli counter to see if there is an offer on cheddar for my 2kg per week....
What if you have 4 DDs and your one DS eats enough for 4?
naturalbaby symmetry with even numbers and gender is best (four girls, four boys - but arguably with a deficiency of pattern).
I feel like I now have permission to try and pair up all the odd socks every few weeks then bin the odd ones
I only have three dc, ds7 and twin dd 5 but half an airing cupboard of unloved odd socks!
Definitely finished though SPD with the twins and I am not going there again odd numbers or not
DD1, 15 has been asked if DD2, 2 or dd3,1 was hers on many occasion. She does look older then her years but she is mortified if people suggest it.
Her granny had the opposite problem, she had dh at 15 and was asked by school to send his mum in to parents night!
Sophie you've hit the nail on the head!
Dd1 mat leave was only that. I've loved my year off this time!
1. When parenting is more like crowd control and you know you would have have had more experience at controlling riots that the Metropollitan Police!
2. When you find and odd sock if every single room of your house
3. When everyone's clothes merge and you find your 8 year old ds wearing age 3-4 pants
4. When you know it's only a matter of time before you leave someone somewhere
5. When you seriously consider employing a diary secretary to manage party invites, football and rugby fixtures!
6. When you've just had an extension and you find yourself telling your husband that the new utility room has transformed your life (when did I become so sad?!)
7. When you're on maternity leave with number 4 remembering the good old days with ds1 when maternity leave was only 18 weeks!
Pacific, my 4th was positively the most challenging baby and toddler I have ever encountered. She was the screechiest, least sleepy baby you could ever hope not to have. She slept through the night at the grand old age of 2.5. Made me determined to have another and perhaps (finally) get it right
My Nr4 (18 months) is by far the livest/cheekiest/most hard work or the lot. I am sure he thinks he is.... oh, at least 5 or so and demands to have everything that everybody else is getting or doing.
He is certainly challenging whatever tricks of the trade I thought I knew <<exhausted>>
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