oh god someone please help me

(5 Posts)
ladythatlunches Sat 14-Dec-13 17:31:57

Im in a horroble groundhog day.

My twins 2 next week, and jeeze it's hard work!
I also have a toddler who is 11 months older than twins and 2 elder children (7, 10)

It's so hard to get out everyday. . My nearly 3yr old is a nightmare sje refuses to go in her pushchair I habe tried everything. . But if she isn't in it she refuses to walk! She wants t be carried everywhere! !! Point refuses to walk to the point where she will sit on the floor, so I cant literally get out on my own! Im stuck in day after day unless it's sunny then we go in the garden.

My dh works all the time such a hard worker but leaves me feeling overwhelmed and over worked. Im exhausted once elder 2 are in bed im on conscious for the night so we never get time together!

The twins are sooo demanding at the moment and I know they get so bored im just stuck in with 3 crying toddlers all hanging off my legs all day every day
Someone please tell me it gets better or just cheer me up would be great. Just sitting here wishing the evening away until dh gets home at 9:30 tonight

MrsWolowitzYouAMerryChristmas Sat 14-Dec-13 17:37:32

It will get better.

There's 11 months between my eldest and my DTs (they are now 3).

It's still incredibly hard work but recently it went from day to day struggling to not being quite so challenging and actually enjoying them more.

If you ever want a moan, I'm always up for a bit of moral support heaven knows I need it!

ladythatlunches Sat 14-Dec-13 17:43:57

Omg mrs I could cry tears of joy that someone else has children the same ages and twins! I honestly feel like when I do go out im the only one struggling out there smile

I wake up and think ok another day.. 2 more hours till there nap!

Swanhilda Sat 14-Dec-13 19:13:53

Just another sympathiser. Dd was one of twins and I had an older child 23 month gap, too (but not as much on my plate as you) and she refused to walk or go in a pushchair at that age. Would do numerous sabotage tactics when we were about and about. The most idyllic outings reduced to tears. She hated walking. She liked playgrounds but not the walk there. She just didn't see the point.

Looking back she was desperately insecure and wanted loads of cuddles and not to be one of the boys' gang, and it was her way of staking her claim to my attention. Could you try to give her that special attention at other times, whether cuddles, chats or praise. Later on, we realised that she just wanted to be close to me, and hated always having to share me. Almost three is of course very young, so although she is the older child and they are the babies, she of course still wanting to be the baby too perhaps? Could you practise at the weekend taking her out in the buggy by herself, so she associates it with good mummy time not shared mummy time? Or could the walk sometimes be to somewhere she really likes, like a playgroup or a friend's house, just to give her a good association.

We got over a lot of our difficulties with dd, struggling to assert her independent claims to my attention, not by being strict but by giving her loads of special attention, especially at bedtime. Then, there was more time to go around for everyone else, as she had stopped demanding so much from us ifysim. It was an investment worth making.

Oh and I used to carry her on the 5 mins walk into school and take her home in the buggy, when she was 4.5 years (her brothers were of course walking). My best friend who had a daughter same age, said, just go with it, just carry her, if she needs it do it. Other mothers looked at me as if I was mad, but it worked, as within 3 months of attending school, she decided being carried/buggies was for babies! Sometimes giving in, was the only way to end the behaviour.

ladythatlunches Sat 14-Dec-13 20:51:34

Thank you so much for your advice.

She is my little tag along, if dh is home and I go to oick dc up or have to pop here ir there she always comes with me. So much easier than taking 2 babies in and out of pushchairs etc and I always carry the lutrle monkey smile she screams "pick my up mummy" and makes a huge scene.

She gets my full attention when the girls nap too, which is difficult as it's only chance I can clean, iron, ir get dressed my self, but she is my shaddow.

We are also having huge problems trying to potty train her, she is hugely stubborn and will refuse the wear her oants or go near toilet or potty so I think what you are saying about her wanting to be a baby like the babies make a lot of sense

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