when we're you confident enough to put twins to bed on own?(12 Posts)
Hi there my twins are 4 months old.
I have a great bedtime routine and lucky enough to have my husband with me every single evening to put them to bed.we do half feed, then baths, then rest of feed and bed. It takes us about an hour an a half as they feed quite slowly.
Some time in the future we will need to be able to put them to bed single handedly....my question is, how will I do it??? How will I manage? Atm I breastfeed one twin while husband bottle feeds the other ( she doesn't like the boob). The breastfed twin will also take a bottle....
How do other twin mums do bath and feed? Is it different and quicker after babies move to solids? And therefore easier ?
I don't want to mess with the routine but would like ideas as eventually want to be independent when necessary e.g. If husband works late...
My dp works shits so straight away, it is not as scary as you would think,it just takes longer. It gets a lot easier as they get older and you will find your feet and do things in a way that works for you.
I would avoid baths every night, and try to prepare an easy dinner before so that when they are settled in bed you can just heat something up and relax.
Do you have one baby that is hungrier ? I used to feed the hungry fast feeding baby first then the slow feeding baby.
Use swinging chairs if they need 1.1 time or won't settle so you can leave one and deal with the other.
If you can do the daytime on your own you can do the nightshift, it's really just the reverse of getting them up. It might sometimes go a bit tits up, but then that can happen at anytime of day.
I used to start the whole process a lot earlier when dp was at work, and make sure they don't get over tired as that's when it got tough.
Good luck, I am sure you will be fine.
Mine are 19mo now and I have still never bathed them on my own - two of them in the water if I'm on my own scares me - but I have happily put them to bed since they were about 8 months old. (We only bath them a couple of times a week anyway - it seems to aggravate DT1s exczema if more than that). They were both FF and I just propped them on a pillow to feed them and winded one by one afterwards, same as I did in the night time feeds.
Do you want to carry on the routine as you are (i.e. feed, bath, feed bed)?
It may be easier skipping the bath, but if you want to carry on with your routine then there is no reason why you can't stick to your routine - in fact, it may be easier as they are used to this routine.
I've had to bath and bed my DTriplets since they were quite small as DH was often late home from work. The first time is so daunting, but once you've done it once, you realise that it isn't that hard
First of all, why don't you try doing it whilst he is home, but staying downstairs - sort of like a test run?
The key really is organisation - have PJ's, bath, towels, nappies, bottles all ready BEFORE the bath. With 1 baby you can dash downstairs with them, with 2 or 3 it is not as easy.
Do they fall asleep on the bottle?
If so, could you double-feed? I.e. Breastfeed one (holding with one arm, rested on lots of cushions) and bottle feed the other with your other hand, whilst she is propped up with pillows. I used to double-feed quite a lot, otherwise feeding X3 took hours. If they are only having half the bottle, and falling asleep after the bottle, then they would probably only need burping once at the end? So you wouldn't need to keep stopping.
If they do/don't fall asleep feeding, then you could basically do the bedtime routine twice - have DT2 under play gym, or similar, upstairs. Bottle, bath, bottle and bed DT1. Repeat with DT2.
By the time that DT2 had been fed, bathed, dressed and fed, DT1 would definitely be asleep (am just thinking about shared rooms?).
Once mine could sit up, it became sooo much easier. I would bring everything into the bathroom, have 3 bath seats (the ones like a leg-less highchair, so couldn't slip out) and put them all in. Get #1 out, dress them and kneel in front of bath and feed them (Whilst #2 and #3 still happy in bath seats). Then I'd have 2 bouncy chairs in bathroom and stick #1 in there whilst I repeated the steps with the other 2.
Good luck, hope it helps
I have done this from quite early in as we have another DD who was just 17 mths when DTs were born so DH puts her to bed while I do twins. Bathing should be fine as long as you have bath supports for them to sit in. I let them kick about on changing mats with no nappy in while I gather clean nappies, pjs etc, then both in bath then take out and dry one at a time. This gets much less stressful as they get older because they don't spend so much of the time crying! We don't do a bath every night though. You don't really need to as long as you have other elements of a routine you do each night (eg I always play the same cd whilst I am doing the last feed).
The feeding bit may be a bit more tricky I guess. I always just breastfed mine together using a feeding pillow. Not sure if you could use one of these to breastfeed one rugby ball style and prop the other up for his bottle on the other side?
Good luck, I'm sure you will be fine. It's always daunting before you do it for the first time.
Mine are 18mths and I have an older who is 4. I put them all to bed alone tonight but to be honest I still don't like it. Having said that it is a breeze really compared to earlier days. I agree that bathing is fine with the twin bath seats. After that, until they can hold their own bottles it is a complete pain feeding one while the other waits. You can rock a chair with one foot while the other feeds. I did this often, but it did not necessarily stop the wailing. You can feed one a bit, transfer them to the chair, hoping they will be a bit more content while you feed the other one, then top up the first. I did this with very mixed results too.
Getting everything you need all in the right place before you start the bath is probably my most useful tip, cus once they are in the water you cannot leave.
Having a few songs you know you are going to sing through the drying bit helped me. I sang the same ones, no matter what chaos was all around me, more to distract myself than them but they started to enjoy it eventually. I liked Puff the Magic Dragon because it reminded me they would not stay wailing babies forever!
DH went back to work when DTs were 4 weeks old and rarely home before 7/730 so since then really.
We got bath seats from mamas and papas so I could bath them together. Get then dry and dressed together ie dry one, dry the other, nappy on one and then the other etc.
Tandem feed and then put to bed. If bottle feeding have you tried having them in bouncy chairs or on a beanbag or in v-shapes pillows side by side and sitting in front - hold the bottles for them but they may start holding their own quite soon (mine were by 6/7 months)
Like pp suggests above I made sure I could do this before DH went back to work with him downstairs "on call"
Bath seat- we used from about 4 weeks until grew out of them and they were sitting up about 8 months
We used the baths seats too, they are great. Makes bath time a lot easier.
Straight away. In fact until very recently (DTs are 2yrs5mo), we've always struggled to put them to bed if more than one of me, DH or my mum is there. We could all do it alone, but the kids really tried it on if there was more than one of us there.
While on maternity leve it was always me putting them to bed. I didn't (and still don't) include bath as part of bedtime; some days they have a bath in the morning, some days at night and some days not at all. I just got them into clean nappies and pjs any time from about 5pm (6pm now they're older) and then fed them to sleep and popped them in their cots. It just seemed like the last nappy and feed of the day happened to include getting pjs on.
When I put them to bed, I lay on our bed and read stories, then when I've had enough I turn out the light and they fall asleep leaning on me. This may or may not involve breastfeeding one or both of them.
When DH puts them to bed, he puts them in their cots and then sits and talks to them, giving cuddles as necessary until they fall asleep or are lying quietly.
When my mum puts them to bed, she rocks DS in her arms singing, while DD stands cuddling my mum's leg and rocking too. Once DS is sleeping he goes in his cot and she picks DD up for a cuddle then puts her in her cot awake and she falls asleep.
That was a total essay. What I am trying to illustrate is that each of us has our own way of managing, and the kids want/get different things depending on who puts then to bed. You'll manage just fine, and you'll find your own way
Thank u everyone! - Must be an amazing feeling to know you do it all independently! I'm going to do a few dry runs - with dh 'on call'
Quite looking forward to the challenge now I have all these tips
Thamm u xxxx
Ps. Can I just ask everyone on this thread how many months old dts were when could hold own bottle? Am curious about when this could happen, I imagine it makes life a lot easier!!
Pps. I know what you mean about singing through the wailing haha to distract myself mainly xx
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