if you had unsettled/ unhappy/ constant attention demanding twins...

(6 Posts)

When did they start to settle down??

Mine are 18 weeks, one is worse and screams if put down- he also wakes on average 4 times a night biut 6 is not unusual. The other wakes more like twice a night and is easier but still much harder work and much less chilled out than my DD was as a baby. I am always on my back foot. Bedtime is a nightmare.- DD is often difficult as well as the twins.

I'm really finding it all an uphill struggle atm.

Any positive stories??

schmee Sun 12-Aug-12 19:56:50

It's a bit of a blur but at 5 months things were getting better I think. That's incredibly hard work for you though with an older child as well. Are you getting some support?

They are lovely now at 5yo btw.

ladythatlunches Sun 12-Aug-12 20:10:11

I really feel for you! Mine were very hard work up untill about 12 weeks' this is when we established a routine and things changed very quickly!

Have you got a routine for the twins?

I also has 3 other children (as well as the twins) so know how hard it is when they all play about!

You defenetly need some time so you can get out by your self for a bit.
My "must haves" for me were - white noise on my phone!
-Swaddling even at this age!
- also your choice completely but I gave my girls baby rice about 16 weeks and they very so content with a bit extra grub!

If I can remember I'm sure they have a really big growing spurt about this week isn't there?!

ladythatlunches how did you get a routine going with other children? DD is 23 months. She doesn't go to nursery or anything so I take her out pretty much every morning- to playgroups, parks, friends houses. This is often when the dts need naps though, so they fall asleep in the car or pushchair but often aren't asleep for long enough imo.

It's chaos really. DD had a routine by now but I really can't seem to get one started with the dts. Also, they can both be tired, fed, put in the pushchair and walked to the park and one will sleep 2 hours and one 20 minutes so the boys are on entirely different schedules too

White noise every bedtime/wake up but am doing sleeping bags not swaddling. One didn't like it (the terrible sleeper, typically)

I gave them some banana yesterday. We'll see...

I'll hope its a growth spurt.

5 months would be great for improvement schmee but i can't imagine it happening, it seems too soon when its all so crap now.

ladythatlunches Mon 13-Aug-12 17:50:31

My other dc were 5, 8 and 10 months when twins came along!

So elder two were no problem, thankfully the little one was in a routine so I slotted the girls in same one so they all ate together and slept the same times!!

I feed twins same time (always have) put them both down same time, if one wakes up before other I just pop dummy back in till other is awake!! When they are both awake I would then get them both up, now they sleep same time etc!!

Do you find it easier being out? I personally don't, I find it such hard work so I wait till my dh is off or my mum can help out of I try and venture out by myself!! Make life easier for yourself while there still so small, your eldest won't suffer of she has to stay in few days .. I constantly felt guilty about this but it's not forever!

toomuchpink Mon 13-Aug-12 21:27:41

Dreamingofpeace, I found it just as hard as you. My twins are nearly a year now and I have an older one too. It is much better at this stage. Sometimes still chaotic, but there is less crying (from all of us!) and the babies are much more fun because they are doing more and learning more and interacting with each other a bit. I would say it started improving slowly from six months with some bad dips when one was teething. I still don't like putting all three to bed by myself, but mostly it is all done by 8pm and they mostly sleep through.
Are you b'feeding? I had one twin that woke more than the other at night. We put her on a bottle at night at 3-and-half months and it made the bedtime routine easier (because my husband fed her) and improved her sleeping. I still b'fed the rest of the time.
The napping got more reliable when they started solid food. I have the same problem that one will sleep well in the buggy and the other one does not, so I mostly make them nap at home. I know this means DD1 cannot go out and see her friends etc and you don't get the company, but if you could just get a napping routine going at home at least you could have some days when you and DD1 get a break from the babies and have a bit of time just the two of you. My DD1 was used to a lot of outings and groups before the twins arrived, but she seems to have adjusted well to more home time. I stashed a bunch of cheap things to do in a cupboard and would produce them on dismal days to perk things up a bit.
Thinking back to that hard first six months I sometimes wonder if I should have just spent some money and got someone in to help for a couple of hours a couple of afternoons a week, just so I could have enjoyed the babies a bit more and felt less drained. If I had to do it again, I would definitely do that, but we have all survived and things are a lot more fun now.

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