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Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

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Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Missed miscarriage- but baby has grown?

26 replies

bella8445 · 02/10/2009 10:29

2 weeks ago I went for a scan due to pains I was having, They could not see anything so done an internal scan, they found it and I was told I couldn't be 8wks I looked less then 5wks and they was no heart beat. I returned this Wednesday to see if there was any change, again they had to do an internal scan they found it but said it was bad as still no heart beat but when they measured it it was now 7wk in size, they also said they was something else growing inside the sac??? a second midwife came and looked and said she was so sorry and left..when I asked how can it grow if it died as no heart beat all she said was "yes it has grown but not as much as we would like and with no heart it is a pregnancy that will not continue". I cried and was told that I should be 10 wks by now and that it most likely died at around 5wks...but I am so confused as it has grown??? Tomorrow I am booked to have a D&C I don't know what to do?

OP posts:

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orangehead · 02/10/2009 10:56

Im so sorry for your loss. I have had 2 missed mcs. The first one they did a erpc, but it tortured me for years thinking they may have made a mistake and I had just killed my baby. The second time I asked if they could check that my hormones were going down. That took about a week of having blood tests every 48 hrs because my levels did not drop straight away. However if your baby did die at 5 weeks your levels would probably be already dropping so it should only delay the d and c by 2 days. For me that week wait was well worth it to have double confirmation my baby had died. I know some prefer to get things over and done with asap, but I needed to be absolute sure I was doing the right thing. I couldnt have years of torturing myself again. If you have doubts speak to them.
I hope you ok.

shonaspurtle · 02/10/2009 11:00

I'm so sorry. I have no real knowledge of this, but second orange that you need to know in your own head that there is no hope before you go through with the d&c.

That could just mean having a good talk with a consultant before hand who can explain clearly exactly what has happened and why they are so sure the baby has died. They need to tell you in a way that makes you sure you are making the right decision.

bella8445 · 02/10/2009 11:05

Thank you for your message, they took bloods two days ago when they told me, it is just the fact they said it had grown that is what I can't get my head round, I couldn't speak to ask more question as I couldn't stop crying and just want to get out of there, I don't know if it would be worth going to a different hospital and seeing what they say or talk to the doctor doing the surgery tomorrow.

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shonaspurtle · 02/10/2009 11:08

Talk to the doctor tomorrow. Or phone and see if you can talk to someone today. You are completely within your rights to ask for a second opinion and it would be a sensible thing to do if you are not sure.

I'm not trying to give you false hope but for the future I do think it's really important that you know what's happened and feel sure that you are making the best decision for you.

shonaspurtle · 02/10/2009 11:10

Write down your questions if you think you might be too upset to ask them in person. It's perfectly ok to just hand over a piece of paper - they will understand.

Is there someone else who could go with you?

orangehead · 02/10/2009 11:14

Did they do a second lot of bloods to compare them? If you have doubts you really need to be sure for your own sanity.

bella8445 · 02/10/2009 14:07

No I have one to go with me, I am going to talk to them tomorrow when I go in and ask them to tell everything they saw in the scan and how they know it has died, I will also ask for them to scan again before I go and do this, maybe I am just hoping they wrong, missed miscarriages are the worst and I am so sorry for all of you that have been through this. You feel betrayed by your body for not letting you know. Good luck to you all and hope things go well for you. I will let everyone know how it goes.

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orangehead · 02/10/2009 14:46

Hope everything goes ok. Another scan is a good idea. It might be an idea to ring today and say you would like another scan before as often the scanning departments can be closed at weekend. They may suggest going in monday instead. Thinking of you

bella8445 · 02/10/2009 15:13

Just to update you all, I am going to see my doctor today as I have been researching as I have an under-active thyroid and I am on medication, the doctor knew this and told me not to worry and to carry on as normal I have found out that I should have been tested asap on my thyroid as it can cause miscarriage if not seen to, as dosage needs to be increased as the baby needs it to grow and it is very important during the first 12wks. I feel let down they should have done something.

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orangehead · 02/10/2009 16:57

Are you seeing Gp or docotor at the hospital?

starkadder · 02/10/2009 18:00

I agree with others that you need to be sure. At 7 weeks, they should see a heartbeat but it is still very early days. I would even go so far as to say it may be worth waiting another week to see if any change before having the D&C.

OnlyWantsOneFartleBerry · 02/10/2009 18:04

Dont want to confuse things here BUT

I had a scan at what I thought was 9 weeks - could see nothing so had internal scan which showed a sac - but empty.

The hospital said I would MC and asked me to have a DC I refused. Went back a week later and sac then had embryo - was dated at 5+4 or some thing - If I had gone and had that DC then my DD would not be here now.

bella8445 · 02/10/2009 23:14

I saw my doctor not the hospital doctor, she said that treating me more with my thyroid wouldn't of change anything, she said she didn't understand why it had still grown, but no heart beat, as for what they saw growing with the baby she said it could be extra placenta growing, I asked if there was any chance they could be wrong, and was told if they were unsure then they would of asked me to come back for another scan, and that they must of seen something wrong for them to decide that it had died. I was advise to talk to them tomorrow and to make sure.

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orangehead · 03/10/2009 10:05

Thinking of you today

TeamEdwardTango · 03/10/2009 10:29

Just read this thread. I've no experience of your situation, but just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and praying you will have your mind put at rest one way or the other.
I know it's not very MN, but anyway!

bella8445 · 07/10/2009 13:19

To all I came home from hospital Monday night after surgery, I had been in hospital since Saturday waiting, I spoke to three different doctors. They told me that the sac was at 10 weeks but the baby at 7 weeks, they said that because it was a missed miscarriage my body was still making the cells grow which meant it grew but there was no sign of a heart beat which there should of been, I asked if there was any chance it would start they said no, Monday on the way to surgery I was in a mess, crying and saying I was killing my baby, and they told me same just before going, I know it is silly but it felt that way, I woke from surgery and went back to ward and was home in just a few hours. I still cry and feel empty inside I guess time will heal the pain. I have now just found out that my friend who was 6 weeks more then me has had a missed miscarriage due to blood clot, I am trying to help her through this as I know what it is like. My heart goes out to all of you that too have had a lost, our angels are in heaven.

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kanella · 07/10/2009 20:50

Hi Bella

So, so sorry for your sad loss. I lost my angel in August. Like you I had a mmc and the sac was 8 weeks but my baby stopped growing at 6. Still very sad and have my bad moments. My best friend and my cousin have all had babies this week and found out another friend is 6 months gone, I've had a little cry and feel sorry for myself. Don't worry Bella, OUR time will come. Take care of yourself xxxxx

orangehead · 08/10/2009 14:57

Im so sorry Bella. It is not silly but totally normal how you feel.
Like your friends mine was due to a blood clot.
Thinking of you

Jules80 · 21/10/2009 10:54

Hi bella. I had a missed miscaraige in august- - I was due to have my 12 week scan- - but started bleedig before it - they had to do internal scan a nothing could be seen as i had introverted uterous- found out that baby was 6-7 weeks - but i was about 11 weeks. its difficult to come to terms with as you think and feel pregnant but dont know whats going on inside. Missed miscarraiges are hard as you expectthings to bee seen and hope that the bleeding is the normal bleeding some women get when they are pregnant. its scary.

Its now 2 months on- i feel better and time does heal bt cant help feeling IF only - - - and that how far gone i would be. But be strong and time will heal and be kind to yourself. This forum really is good.

love
x x

bella8445 · 20/03/2010 10:56

Dear all, just to update, It has been 5 months since my loss, it was at christmas that the hospital contacted me and told me they found nothing wrong with my baby, and every day I think what if i had left it not had the op waited maybe my baby would of been ok it was just a slow starter.... I have been trying for a new baby but no sign till now...apart from I had some bleeding and had to go for scan they saw nothing, my bhcg is high and im 6 weeks...i have to in tomorrow to check my bhcg again they have told me it could be a missed pregnancy or ecopic..I was in a really bad place after the first m/c if this turns out bad aswell I dont know what to do.

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ShowOfHands · 20/03/2010 11:07

Oh no. You've really been through it.

I know you're feeling sad and guilty about the erpc and wondering if you should have waited but with the first 12 weeks of pregnancy, there's no such thing really as a 'slow starter'. They date the pregnancy at 12 weeks as up until then, fetal development is pretty much uniform. Your baby's heart begins to be beat in the 6th week. Scanned at 7 weeks, my dd had the beginnings of limbs, a heart, the shape of the skull. If they can confirm that you've been pg for 10 weeks and there's no heartbeat, sadly there is no hope. I had a scan at 10wks 4days when pg with dd and the baby had arms, legs, facial features, clear heart with chambers etc. This is what you should see and I am so, so sorry that you didn't. You must try not to torture yourself with thoughts of what you might have done. You did nothing, but had to follow a path to end a pregnancy that heartbreakingly wasn't able to progress. They were thorough by the sounds of it.

I do so hope it's different for you this time.

Did the scan show a sac? Or nothing at all?

bella8445 · 20/03/2010 11:41

They said there was nothing then they said there was something but it was not clear and they couldnt tell so they just went with they saw nothing, they check for my ovarys but could not see them either. So I hope when I go tomorrow they will give me good news. I told myself when I found out I was pregnant this time that I would not get happy but you do and you go through the hurt and worry again. So I dont know if they saw anything or not they just told me in the end they saw nothing.....

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ShowOfHands · 20/03/2010 12:02

Are you sure of your dates? You know when you ovulated?

bella8445 · 20/03/2010 12:50

my guess is that I may of conceived around 4 weeks ago...if not then I would be 5 weeks... I didnt check when I was ovulating.

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ShowOfHands · 20/03/2010 13:00

Are your cycles regular? You know the date of your last period?

If you don't know when you ovulated, then it is of course possible that you're not 6 weeks at all.

When did you test positive?

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