1st miscarriage-In shock-Need advice

[jellylegs]

Just home from hospital-miscarried at 9 weeks. I bleed so much much they kept me in ..... I passed SAC and placenta. I am so sad as I had been TTC no 3 for 8months. I don't want to sound ungrateful as I know I have 2 healthy kids but it feels so wrong.Am dreading going back to work as 3 girls are pregnant. No one knows I had become pregnant
would love to hear some positive stories as judging from boards - theres a lot of brave , positive women out here!!
When can I try again?Am I more fertile straight after?More at Risk? sorry for all the questions but I can't sleep and need something to 'hold' on to.

[mymblemummy]

Oh I am so very sorry for you. When I miscarried my first pregnancy they told me to leave attempting to conceive for a few months to let my body settle down. I did, and I am glad I did as a miscarriage wipes you out physically and mentally.

My sister-in-law got pregnant a few weeks later. It is hard to face and I'm afraid I stayed away from her for a long time because I couldn't bear the reminder. I was very fond of my nephew when he turned up.

I've had two normal pregnancies, and two lovely children since then.

Miscarriages are so common but no-one tells you until you've had one. Then everyone comes out of the woodwork.

It is perfectly normal to grieve. This was your longed-for baby. Can you take some time off? You've been through a horrible ordeal and you need to recover.

[bigbaubleeyes]

I'm sorry I cant answer your questions but just wanted to say give yourself some time and space as you've been through a lot. Is there some way you could let someone know at the office that could let them girls know just so they not talking about stuff right in front of you when you get back?

Big hugs Take care

[belgo]

Jellylegs -I'm sorry to hear this. Look after yourself, it will take a while for your hormones to get back to normal.

Last year I lost my third and fourth pregnancies to miscarriage. I had two healthy girls so it was a shock.

Each time I started trying again immediately, and now have a little boy, six weeks.

Good luck.

[TheBlonde]

Sorry to hear of your loss
You can try again whenever you feel ready.

[littleboyblue]

Hi jellylegs I'm so sorry about your m/c.
I had my 3rd m/c at the beginning of may, and fell pregnant again within a number of days.
I've heard that due to hormone levels that are still quite high, you'd be fertile straight away.
That doesn't mean you will fall pregnant again quickly, and doesn't mean you should.
Try again whenever you are ready.
I know it's hard to be around those that are pregnant after something so tragic.
Good luck

[scamperT]

Hi jellylegs really sorry for the loss of your anticipated DC number 3 . I don't have children yet, and have had 2 mc, but from getting to know other ladies on MN, I don't think it is any easier at all to cope with mc if you already have children, so of course you don't sound ungrateful.

I was told I could start ttc immediately if I felt ready, and that the only reason some doctors say to wait is so that it is easier to date the next pg, if you are lucky enough to get pg right away.

I have thrown myself into ttc after each mc and not pg yet, but still hoping!

I would say that I think I didn't allow myself the time to grieve properly before, and just put all that angst into ttc which was not the best for me and DH. Its hard to shake the feeling that I won't be properly happy again until I hold my first DC in my arms, but MN is helping to keep baby mania a bit more manageable.

Good luck whatever you decide. Oh, and don't go back to work too soon like I did, take as much time off as you can xx