second miscarriage and 44

(15 Posts)
hr3161 Thu 14-Aug-08 11:33:19

I have just had my second miscarriage this year (Saturday). I was 44 last month and the first one I had in March. Although I am fortunate to have two teenagers I have wanted a third child for ages. Life's circumstances put it on hold and now I feel really sad that I might have left it too late. I have had no problem conceiving- it only took 1 risk each time. I have so many questions going round my head. What is the reason? Are my eggs no good? Is it the fact I have had stress-the first time due to family illness affecting my extended family, but why the second. Both occurred at around 6-7 and a half weeks. Are there any other women out there with similar stories? Thankyou.

WinkyGirl Thu 14-Aug-08 16:56:32

Hey hr3161 so sorry to hear of your loses. I had 2 mc in a row last year before conceiving DS. Its a horrible thing to go through. Like you I had a child already and took comfort in the fact that my body could "do the job." Though admittedly there wasn't much of an age gap.

Have you been on the ttc after mc thread? They were invaluable to me and may be able to help.

Good luck smile

WinkyGirl Thu 14-Aug-08 17:01:40

Thread here

LittleBear7 Thu 14-Aug-08 18:02:13

I feel for you. I'm 43 and have lost three in less than a year. I wish I'd done the research that I've now done last August so I could've checked myself out to make sure all is well. So much info out there about what can cause problems - I'm waiting for a referral to fertility clinic (I can't be infertile!) to check nothing is wrong with me or hubbie. I know two ladies, aged 44, who have both recently had healthy sons.

sunshine185 Sat 16-Aug-08 09:51:50

sorry about your loss, there are things you can do to help improve your internal reproductive health, have you looked at taking some supplements such agnus cactus/vitex is very good as is all the b vitamins...

good luck

solo Sat 16-Aug-08 09:55:44

I had my Dd at almost 43, so don't give up.
I also had a mc at age 32 and one at 40. I was a lot fitter at 32 than I was at 43. Hope it all works out well for you.

squilly Sat 16-Aug-08 19:20:42

My bf had her second child at 43...she's just been to visit and her second dd is adorable.

I had my first child at 36 after 3 mcs followed by a 4th mc when I was 40. I decided not to try again as I couldn't take the hassle and now I regret it. But the gap between my dd and another child would be too big now, so it won't happen.

If I could just say to you, don't give up until you absolutely have to. And keep pushing the medical staff until you can push no more. Good luck for the future. I hope you get your longed for child soon.

ponyoni Sun 17-Aug-08 22:08:02

very sorry to hear hr3161 about your m/c. i am no expert but sounds like you are still ovulating monthly which is good news at 44, so fingers crossed. as far as i understand early miscarriages aren't considered so indicative of a problem as late miscarriages and it may well be that you can bring a healthy baby to term; my friend had a very healthy (10lb!) baby boy at 44 having had a miscarriage prior and first pregnacy at 39...
i am 36, just had two miscarriages in a row, again obviously ovulating and conceiving right away, but surprised to miscarry at 7 weeks, then 9 weeks, having had a very unproblematic pregnancy and delivery of my first child nearly five years ago...my gp took the view that there can't really be a problem since i took a pregnancy to term last ime, but i am not so confident and if it happens again i will be very assertive about asking for all manner of tests...but fingers crossed for us allx

wonderstuff Sun 17-Aug-08 22:12:36

So sorry to hear of your loss
Miscarrage, what every woman should know by Lesley Regan is really good and helped me after my m/c - I was 26 and took me 3 years to get pg again - but dd is fine!

ponyoni Sun 17-Aug-08 22:14:07

and squilly, what do you mean the gap will be too big? i know kids that are 13 years apart...

catweazle Sun 17-Aug-08 22:28:30

I had my DD at 43 (2 months before my 44th birthday) after 2 missed m/c- the first at 10 weeks and the second at 7 weeks. DD was born a year and a day after the first of those EDD.

Racht75 Mon 18-Aug-08 11:34:22

Hi Ladies
Firstly i have a beautiful baby boy who will be one next week. But i am writing because I have had 2 mc's this year the 1st one was on the 1st of May, we were 9 weeks. Hubby and i then waited a cycle before trying again even though our obs said no need to wait. We just had our 2nd mc on the 12th Aug. Both mc's were very different. With my first i had severe pain and cramping and a lot of blood loss then bled for 25 days. I thought this was normal... apparently not. I didn't get any medical procedures as the ultrasound showed that there was no pregnancy left. So its been a week today since my 2nd mc and the bleeding has almost stopped already. Both times i miscarried my blood tests showed in the 1st mc a really high level of progesterone and in the 2nd mc a low level of progesterone. So my doc has now referred me back to an obs asking is there anything we can do to stay pregnant with our next pregnancy eg hormones etc. I called my ob today to make an appointment and she mentioned HCG injections- What is this? Does anyone know if there any thing i can do to keep my progesterone levels normal during pregnancy?
Also I am still breastfeeding my first bub do you think the progesterone levels were affected by me still breastfeeding? When i first mc i thought maybe it was too soon for my body and with the 2nd i keep thinking its because of me breast feeding still. Its obvious i am pretty fertile as we don't have to try hard to get pregnant. Its just staying pregnant seems to be the problem. We have decided to wait 2 cycles before trying again but i guess i just want to know is there anything i can do to stay pregnant?

brie41 Mon 18-Aug-08 15:04:02

I have just found out that I have had a third consecutive miscarriage. Also had one before my gorgeous 2.5 year old daughter was born. After my previous miscarriage in February this year I was referred to a recurrant miscarriage clinic and initially diagnosed with "sticky blood" so I was put on aspirin, heparin and progesterone for this pregnancy. The diagnosis proved to be a mistake (!) and obviously the drugs didn't help as I've miscarried again with a third consecutive MMC. I'm 41 and really wondering if it is worth the emotional trauma of carrying on but know deep down that I will regret it if I don't. I have an appointment with the consultant later this week and am going to ask about IVF with embryo screening. Has anybody looked into this? Is it extortionatly expensive? I feel so guilty as I feel that I am not making the most of my daughter whilst I am on this miscarriage rollercoaster but then I also feel guilty about not providing her with a sibling as I am so close to my two sisters. However, I know people that have given birth in their mid forties and I am able to get pregnant so there is definitely hope.

squilly Mon 18-Aug-08 16:33:14

Ponyoni

I think I use this as an excuse in a way, to keep off the MC rollercoaster. I know 8 years isn't that big a gap, but starting again at 43? And also having a pretty high chance of MC again, I figure it's too big a gap for me.

In terms of what people can do to stay pg, I don't think anyone knows. I had injections til week 14 with dd and succesfully gave birth to her, but when I had my next mc, they said the method used before was pretty much proven to be useless in the fight against mc! So, 13 years after the first mc (well, first confirmed mc...think I had another at 21 but put it down to late period) I'm no wiser as to why.

I think sometimes that's the disheartening thing. Not knowing why it's happening.

Roll on the day when they actually find out why this happens to so many women. Maybe then they can stop the grief.

So sorry to hear about your mcs Ponyoni, Racht, Brie, Catweazle, et al...it's just so heartbreaking.

hazy68 Fri 08-Jan-16 11:34:51

hi Racht75 I was wondering the same, I'm 44 and have just miscarried at 5 and a half weeks and am absolutely gutted, like you I'm still breastfeeding my bubs who will be one in 2 days time I was also wondering if it could be a progesterone issue but because of my age and the fact that I already have children my gp's don't seem interested. I'm hoping that I can manage to conceive again as my age is against me I'm really not ready to give up yet .... wishing good luck to all you ladies in the same boat and hoping that 2016 will be our year ...

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