2mmcs, not prepared to wait for a third

(15 Posts)
Granadilla Sat 25-Jun-16 18:05:46

My first mmc was last year in June (found out at 11 weeks that baby died around 7 weeks). Since then I was ttc and got pregnant 10 months later. I have just this week lost this baby (second mmc, baby died at nearly 10 weeks).

I know miscarriage isn't investigated until 3 mcs, but can't think about ttc again and just hope that everything will be OK. I feel it's more than unlucky and can't face ttc for another 10 months to lose another baby, knowing I could have done something to make it work. I'm nearly 34, so also feel soon I will be told time isn't on my side.

I'm not sure what I'm asking for. Anyone been in the same place? Any recommendations for getting seen by a specialist? I've heard of Coventry, but wonder if I'm a severe enough case for them - How can I get in somewhere like there? Anyone else angry that miscarriage is dismissed as unlucky?

AlbusPercival Sat 25-Jun-16 18:12:34

I'm sorry for your losses.

I had 2 mc in a row so understand where you are coming from.

For my third pregnancy I did a lot of research and took certain vitamins etc. I am now 22 weeks, probably down to chance but I felt happier to be doing sineghjnf

4yoniD Sat 25-Jun-16 18:27:17

2 miscarriages during 1 year 3 months of trying. My third attempt is now 8 and playing on her kindle fire...

DD2 took 2 nights of trying...

Granadilla Sat 25-Jun-16 19:06:48

Thank you both for your stories of hope. And sorry for your losses too.

Tomkat79 Sun 26-Jun-16 00:36:07

Statistically you are still more likely to have a successful pregnancy next time than miscarry. Wishing you lots of luck, MC is the worst

doleritedinosaur Sun 26-Jun-16 00:42:20

Have you discussed this with your GP?

Mine did basic tests she could do after my second chemical then referred me sadly after my third MC.

Coventry is £360 for self funded NHS not sure if you need to be referred though.

Sorry for your losses.

KittensandKnitting Sun 26-Jun-16 01:00:04

I was seen after two because of my age I'm 38 and a good doctor who understood my panic about the whole thing, I have just experienced miscarriage number 6, praying this will be lucky number 7 (waiting for BFP but have all the signs!) I'm now having tests for hyper fertility and killer cells which is what they do at Coventry. Coventry you have to pay for yourself btw.

How old are you? Perhaps See a sympathetic GP explain how depressed/upset it is making you and I'm sure they will push you forward. First steps are local miscarriage clinic for initial exams and tests.

I am in the very low % of people who have potential "high" fertility so I get pregnant every time I ovulate just can't keep them in for very long so I am a super unusual case, the chances of you having a third miscarriage are super low so take comfort in that as it really might not happen again for you smile

It's an awful thing to go through but do try to keep positive it may all be ok for you flowers sorry for your loses flowers

KittensandKnitting Sun 26-Jun-16 01:00:59

You do need to be referred to Coventry smile or I have been anyway

furryleopard Sun 26-Jun-16 01:12:21

I'm sorry for your losses, as PP said the chances are you'll have a successful pregnancy next time. I agree that there are clear problems with how we treat women's health issues like miscarriage.

I had 4 mc before I had my daughter, the only thing I did differently with her was taking 75mg aspirin from a positive test (well 2 days before because I knew I was pregnant again). I had also stopped drinking alcohol, lost 2 stone through better diet and took my vitamins religiously.

You could ask your doctor to do the blood tests they can, things like thyroid etc...

Good luck, my 5th pregnancy is now nearly 2! I hope it works out for you.

thedicewoman Sun 26-Jun-16 01:14:55

I had two mc before I had DDand I remember feeling like you too. I also had another mc in between DD & DS. It is awful at the time but don't give up yet. Also should add that I had my first at 36, and no-one ever said anything to me about my age.

FraggleRock77 Sun 26-Jun-16 12:35:29

Sorry for your loss. I'm just waiting to miscarry for a third time! You can just call Coventry. No referral needed. I'm trying to find the details on another thread. Hopefully someone will come along with the info. I have high killer cells and blood clotting issues. I have had a raft of tests but not via Coventry. Good luck.

SESthebrave Sun 26-Jun-16 12:43:47

I'm so sorry for your losses. It's heartbreaking.

My experience is that at 35yo I had a mmc discovered at 12wk scan after tycoon for 18mo. I then got pg again the next month which also resulted in a mmc. We decided to keep trying and I got pg again 3 months later. I was anxious and on edge every day but as a result I know have my amazing 7yo DS.

We then tried again once he was 18mo. After 6mo I was pg but had a mmc. After another few months I was pg and now have my gorgeous 4yo DD.

I know I am so lucky but we won't try again, even though I'd always wanted 4DC.

It's really tough but I hope you can take heart from my story. I was older than you but it did happen for me. I never forget my 3 lost babies and the pain is still there but does get easier.

FraggleRock77 Sun 26-Jun-16 13:17:01

The info you need about Conventry is in the recurrent miscarriage thread number 29, a long way down the page. You need to go into the previous post info in the first post and then go down to

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/16W1XMZ2Dasd6dJq2wSfz03enRrnYCv2jl0SS_a2xAeI/edit?usp=docslist_api

Hopefully it should work. You only need to have had one miscarriage to refer yourself. I was all ready to go but i decided to stick with the private clinic we were at for fertility treatment.

No one really posts on the thread anymore. They have a private Facebook group you can join. I will bump the thread up to the top. Hope it helps x

Granadilla Sun 26-Jun-16 20:00:53

Thanks for everyone who has taken the time to respond. It really helps and makes me feel less alone. And thanks for the Coventry details, I'll give them a call tomorrow and see what they say.

And I'm so sorry to hear people going through this and worse.

Jsy123 Sun 26-Jun-16 20:21:43

I'm sorry for your losses. I miscarried my first and second pregnancies (both mmc). I felt the same way as you and struggled to believe that it was just bad luck (as my doctor said). I couldn't face the thought of trying again but in the end that part was taken out of my hands as I fell pregnant straight after the second miscarriage. I had already started to take baby aspirin after the second mc and continued taking it throughout the pregnancy. I'm not sure if that made the difference but that pregnancy was successful.

I hope that it's third time lucky for you too. Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now