Hello,
I haven't written on here before and I'm sorry if this is a repeat of a similar post. I'm just feeling so desperately sad and need to connect somehow to others. Today I started losing blood and having familiar cramps, this will be my third miscarriage in a row.
I have two gorgeous children and feel so guilty for feeling our family is incomplete, but since the first mc which happened at 10 weeks last August, it has felt like there is an empty space in our family and I so badly want to fill it, for all of us. I really don't want to seem ungrateful as I have been dealt a wonderful hand in life, but these losses have brought such feelings of bleakness and despair and I don't know where to go with them - the feelings of hopelessness are unbearable and so unfamiliar to me!
DH and I were quite open about the first mc which is positive in terms of support but now it feels like friends and family are waiting for more happy news, so seeing anyone is just painful. I would quite like to hide abroad for at least a year actually, avoiding all fun and social activities. But life just carries on doesn't it, and we smile and say 'fine thanks' to most people who ask.
With every mc my dh becomes less keen on the idea of trying again, so I am trying to be light hearted about it in front of him, (probably why I am writing on here), as he's worried that it's too upsetting for both of us to go through many more times. But the only thing keeping me from that darkest of dark places is hope for the future. I would love it if anyone was willing to share stories of hope as that is all I can focus on, this moment is just too sad.
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Third miscarriage
15 replies
wyni · 24/01/2016 19:27
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