Can you get postnatal depression after a miscarriage?

(5 Posts)
SeriousStuff Mon 18-Jan-16 22:24:55

That's it really. I lost my baby on Christmas eve and while the grief is getting better, my general mood is getting worse - have no energy, have hysterical moments of laughing and crying, a general feeling of indifference...

christinarossetti Mon 18-Jan-16 22:28:58

I'm sorry for your loss. I don't know if your distress would be called 'post natal depression', although it certainly sounds like a grief reaction to your miscarriage.

Be easy on yourself - it was only a few weeks ago, at a really difficult time of year. Many women take a long time to emotionally recover from a miscarriage, and grief comes out in various ways like depression as well as the more obviously grievous crying etc.

Do you think going to your GP would help?

Pigeonpost Mon 18-Jan-16 22:40:39

So sorry for your loss. I had 3 miscarriages in 9 months several years back and whilst I wouldn't say I have post natal depression, I did have actual depression and needed counselling to help me function. I was so miserable and struggled to muster up the enthusiasm to get out of bed and go to work. There were happy pregnant people and babies everywhere. That said, the only thing that truly made me feel better was a successful pregnancy and then it just switched off almost as if it had never happened which was very odd.

It is early days for you and I know all too well that what you want most of all is to be successfully pregnant and not feel so sad all the time. A year feels very short when you realise there are only 12 (ish) opportunities to conceive in it. So my advice would be to be kind to yourself, don't feel bad for being said, it is a loss which you need to grieve for like any other. Miscarriage is so so common, much more so than you realise until it happens to you and for most people they go on to have a successful pregnancy next time. They never found a cause for my 3 recurrent mc's, I look at it as my body practicing and whilst I am sad for the children I never met, I wouldn't have had the amazing children I had if I hadn't been through it. Take support where you can, talk to friends and family if you feel up to it and maybe look up some of the Miscarriage Association material. The support groups didn't work for me but they did for others.

Look after yourself. thanks

SeriousStuff Mon 18-Jan-16 23:32:28

Thank you both. Maybe I should see my GP, just in case.

I just feel so alone. Even though I talk to DH about it, if a day goes by and I haven't I think he just thinks that everything's ok. I really don't think he gets that it's somewhere on my mind all the time.

I have a great network of friends but I'm just worried that, by now, they would all be thinking why hasn't she moved on already?

pigeon I'm so sorry for you losses x

christinarossetti Tue 19-Jan-16 13:47:54

Grief doesn't take a linear path though. You're not 'over it' once you've had a slightly better day.

I think it's very hard for lots of people, probably men in particular, to understand the complexity and enormity of pregnancy loss. A miscarriage isn't 'behind' you as you had expected to still be pregnant now, and are mourning that too.

It can't harm to see your GP (do you have a regular one?) They should be able to refer you to counselling if you think that would help. It's useful to know there's a space that you can talk things through.

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