surgical management of miscarriage

(12 Posts)
JoMalones Tue 08-Dec-15 15:49:04

Got the devastating news that our baby stopped growing a few weeks ago. We had a healthy scan at 6w but at 12 it's a MMC. I've elected to have the surgical option as don't want to pass/give birth to it.
Does anyone have any experience? Anything I should know? Is it painful? Is there much loss after? Still numb but I want to be prepared (my way of dealing with things).
Thanks

Whoknewitcouldbeso Tue 08-Dec-15 15:58:56

So sorry to hear your news sad

I have had three miscarriages, two early and natural, one where a MMC was found at 12 week scan and baby had died just before (of Downs we subsequently found out).

My choices were MVA under local but they were booked up with a two week late or MVA under general which they could do in a few days. I elected for the later and physically it was fine. No pain at all, had bleeding afterwards for two weeks and then got my period about a month later.

I fell pregnant again three months later and am now 31 weeks, so whilst I was devastated at least I had an explanation and my body bounced back quickly.

Lots of hand holding for you xx

wonkylegs Tue 08-Dec-15 16:09:58

I had an ERPC for miscarraige at 17wks last year.
I went into the hospital and got changed into a gown, they took me through to theatre and put me to sleep - which I was nervous for but it was all very calm. I woke up in recovery and then just burst into tears, it was physically fine, tiring but fine, I felt a bit tender but it was ok. Emotionally it was exhausting and more difficult. I highly recommend giving yourself time to grieve & heal. I was very worn out for about a week after I don't know whether it was physical or emotional but I needed a lot of sleep.
Bleeding afterwards was minimal and my periods returned 4wks later.
I'm not sure there is a good way to get through it but you will get through it. Crappy Christmas movies and chocolate helped numb things for me whilst I got over it.
I'm currently 18wks pregnant with all looking good.

Wolfiefan Tue 08-Dec-15 16:14:19

Wonky that's such a clear and honest post. My first pg ended at 13 weeks as an ERPC following a MMC.
I was a wreck. Convinced I would never have kids. I veered between numb and sobbing for a bit.
I did have some bleeding after and felt a bit rubbish with the GA. Do have time off and be gentle on yourself.
It may be completely off topic and I apologise if its insensitive but I never had another one and now have two children
flowers

Moving15 Tue 08-Dec-15 16:20:55

So sorry you have to deal with this.
From experience I didn't have much loss at all as they leave things very tidy and i physically recovered very quickly although the antibiotics i was on didn't agree with me. I felt a bit bruised up for a few days but that sorted itself out quickly.
I had a late miscarriage and due to that gave birth which was very traumatic. Due to a retained placenta I still required surgical intervention.
Give yourself some time afterwards to follow your body's cue around sleep and appetite and coming to terms with it all.
I did have crazy hormones for several weeks afterwards with hot flushes particularly at night but my period came back exactly 4 weeks on xx

HopefulHamster Tue 08-Dec-15 16:26:34

I'm so sorry OP.

I had a mmc discovered at about 9 weeks for a 7 week embryo.

I was having the surgery at a day surgery unit that covered a number of ailments. We had no childcare and my husband had my son to look after. I hadn't realised they wouldn't be able to wait with me (perhaps obvious in hindsight), and I felt very sad and alone while I waited. I'd recommend having someone with you if at all possible. The nurses were really kind. The worst physical bit for me was someone trying to find my vein for the canula. I really hate canulas!

Recovery was fine to the point that I can't remember much of it. However I tried to hide it all from work and just had a day off for the op. I wish I'd just told some people and taken a week off to grieve and rest. It was harder emotionally than physically. I think I expected to magically sail through it as it was quite early in pregnancy but I would've been better off accepting my feelings.

Huge hugs your way.

BipBippadotta Tue 08-Dec-15 16:33:42

Very sorry to hear about your mmc.

It is devastating news indeed, and I hope you & your dp are looking after each other.

I had an ERPC earlier this year and it was really easy, painless and unfrightening. I had general anaesthetic, which I respond well to (it leaves me quite cheerful for a couple of days after). I had no pain or soreness afterwards. I bled for just over a week and periods returned in 5 weeks. Mine was also a mmc - I was 9 wks pg, but the embryo had died at 5.5 wks.

Best of luck to you. x

JoMalones Tue 08-Dec-15 20:07:33

Thank you for all your kind words and sharing your experiences. It has made me feel that bit better and more positive x

I just still can't believe it yet deep down knew if that makes sense?!

RoTo72 Tue 08-Dec-15 20:23:26

Hi. I should have been 13 weeks pregnant yesterday, but baby's heart stopped around 6+ weeks. I had erpc on 27th and it was a good option (if any r under the circumstances). My recover was straight forward, bled lightly for a couple of days tapering into brownish spotting. I went in at 7.30 and was home before 12. The staff were wonderful and kind. I had headaches after and felt bruised. Also period like cramping, but not as bad. One thing I didn't know could happen u til I spoke to Dr was it hurt to go to the loo, to do a pee. Apparently its because ur bladder presses against ur uterus. It wasn't that bad, and only lasted a couple of days, just letting you know that can be normal xx. Miscarriage is the worst experience of my life, but talking to women who have and are going thru it really helped me

Lizzylp Sat 09-Apr-16 12:11:02

Hi. I know I'm sort of resurrecting a thread, but I found it useful to read when I was going through this and I think the more we can share, the better.

My experience relates to the EPAU in Queen Alexandra Hospital, Portsmouth. I now know that this hospital doesn't have the best reputation, and if we have the same situation again I will choose to register with our next nearest maternity unit in Chichester.

This Thursday we had a confirmation scan and were not shown the image, the sonographer was silent and sent us straight to a room with no windows to wait for the nurse (for over an hour which I spent crying my eyes out). The nurse told us the foetus had shrunk and talked us through the options again, but I had already decided on surgery by that point. She answered all our questions and booked me in for surgery the next day (yesterday).

We got to the hospital at 7am, I changed into my gown, compression socks and slippers and waited in a room with my husband for them to call me up to surgery. I was upset that myself and the other lady going through this were left alone with no partners or nurse to wait for the surgery, but luckily I didn't wait too long.

The surgical team were lovely, even though it was a bit scary walking into a giant operating theatre. I cried when they put me to sleep, which made it tricky for them to do their job as I couldn't breath, but someone held my hand and I calmed down enough to take the deep breaths and soon faded out.

When I woke up in the recovery room I felt quite sore and trembly and I had another little cry as I felt my baby was really gone. But I had a wonderful nurse sitting with me the whole time, chatting in a soothing voice. She gave me some pain relief through the cannula and a warm blanket to help with the shaking. I soon felt much better, though sleepy, and the nurse never left me for more than a few moments. I asked about the other lady having the same surgery and the nurse kindly checked and told me she was out of surgery and ok too, which for some reason really helped, even though I don't know her at all.

Once I was more awake, I was taken down to another recovery/discharge suite which I was upset to find was mixed sex. This is because the hospital doesn't have enough space in the gynae ward so you end up in general day surgery. I was left alone in my bay with the curtain open, which I found a bit distressing as I knew I was bleeding a lot and only had a pad between my legs with no underwear. Nobody could see, but I felt uncomfortable asking for help. I had to eat something and go for a week before I could leave. Luckily they rang my husband early and he came to sit with me. I felt dreadful asking the assistant to help me cover up the blood etc and walk me to the bathroom before I got dressed. I'm glad I did it in that order, because when I got there to clean myself up I discovered I had bled a lot and it was all down my legs. I was really glad I had taken wipes and extra-strength night time pads.

After I got dressed (still with the cannula in which was tricky) I was allowed into the discharge area. The cannula was removed, a nurse read us the discharge papers, my husband signed to say he would look after me, and we left.

I find it galling that once you are miscarrying you no longer qualify for free prescriptions or dressings etc, so you have to buy your painkillers and pads - a kick in the teeth at the worst time, even if it doesn't cost that much. I feel like they are saying "you can't have a baby therefore you don't deserve our support!"

Anyway, we came home at about 2pm and I have been lying on the sofa, sleeping on and off with no pain that cocodamol and/or ibuprofen can't handle so far, though my hips and lower back are aching more than I expected. I'm up every so often to make sure I'm not bleeding too much. That is on and off too at the moment, but definitely manageable so far.

Emotionally, I have been down, down further, inconsolable, numb and relieved by turns and at random. Right now I'd say I'm numb and relieved, but any minute I could start crying. Nobody I know has dealt with anything like this, so they generally react with "it's ok, you can try again" or "it's a minor setback" which makes me want to throttle them quite frankly. It makes people so uncomfortable that they need to say these things, but for me it is the thing I have always feared most and now it has happened and I'm so scared it will happen again even though I know all the statistics. People don't seem to realise that you attach all your hopes and dreams of a family on the little life that is meant to be growing inside you, and when that life is taken away it is devastating. I'm not sure that even my husband really understands how I feel, but he hasn't really talked about it yet.

All in all, there is no getting away from the whole thing being horrendous, but I am glad I chose surgery. We are not through it all yet, but the relief to have at least the worst physical part over and the pregnancy symptoms finally going made it worth it. I couldn't have coped with an extended period of limbo, not knowing when it might happen.

We have decided to plant a tree to commemorate this first baby who we will never get to meet, and to give us hope for the future.

For anyone going through this or who has already gone through it, I am so sorry, and wish you all the best for your recovery and any future pregnancies. I hope in the future women will be able to talk more openly and be more prepared for these horrendous events.

Wolfiefan Sat 09-Apr-16 12:18:20

Lizzy that is such a brave post. I'm so sorry for your loss.
flowers

bananafish81 Sat 09-Apr-16 15:06:40

Thanks so much for sharing

Just to echo for anyone else who reads this, I had an ERPC 4 weeks ago, and felt it was 100% absolutely the right option for me

We discovered I'd had a MMC at my 10 week scan. We had seen a beautiful heartbeat at 7+1 and 8+5 but at 10w scan baby only measured 9+3 with no fetal heartbeat sad

Dr got me booked in as an emergency day case, so we found out at 10am, I was in theatre for an ERPC by 6pm and home by 10pm. My medical insurance covered it privately, which meant we could pay for the tissue testing to be done, however the experience of the procedure itself isn't much different to anyone else's

I had minimal pain or discomfort, it was over very quickly, and bleeding thereafter wasn't heavy. I found the physical side of it much less traumatic - the prospect of natural or medical management terrified me, and I'm so glad I opted for surgical management, it was definitely the right choice for me.

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