Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Suspected missed miscarriage - what next?

16 replies

Helgand · 30/11/2006 00:18

In theory I am 13+2 pg but I have felt for a while that it was a missed miscarriage. Midwife couldn't find heartbeat at 13+1 and I have to see her again at 14+1 to try and find heartbeat again. Assuming that it is a missed miscarriage, what will happen next - do I have to have a procedure or can I just wait for something to happen naturally? Btw, had a mc in May (didn't know I was pg) and bled heavily for 63 days. I have had 2 dds by cs, most recent one Oct 2005. I am 34 yrs old, 35 soon.

OP posts:

Report

AitchTwoOh · 30/11/2006 00:37

did they not scan you?
i remember once at 14 weeks when the midwife couldn't find the heartbeat and everything was panic. luckily i could kinda feel the baby by that point and i had my own doppler in the house so i wasn't fussed, but it does happen.
i can't answer your question, helgand, and i am sorry to hear of your previous loss and this uncertain pregnancy. i hope everything works out.

Helgand · 30/11/2006 07:23

Where I live the first routine scan is at 20 weeks so I will only get a scan if there is no heartbeat at 14 weeks.

OP posts:

Helgand · 30/11/2006 08:42

13+3 - have just started to bleed but no pain. My mw said if I started to bleed to ring the gp and go into hospital. When she said that it sounded a bit excessive and I still think that now. Very tempted to sit it out. Asx the NHS couldn't afford for me to have a mw do a home visit next week it seems a bit of an insult to say they have the money for me to go to hospital when I feel okay (gripe over!). Any previous experiences out there that might be helpful?

OP posts:

pinkranger · 30/11/2006 08:49

helgand, i didnt want to see your post go unaswered. I had a missed m/c at 10+2 weeks but choose to have the d&c as that wasi how i felt i could cope with it better. i would suggest going to the hospital just for advice on how to manage it if nothing else, i heard that natural missacarge can be quite painful. It might not be a missed miscarrge and at least going will be albe to tell you.
Good luck x

AitchTwoOh · 30/11/2006 11:23

sorry to hear about this, helgand. i think that's a bit cruel not to scan you, tbh. are you in the UK?
what about giving the hospital a phone before just going in. i can understand your reluctance, of course. sad news, helgand...

Helgand · 30/11/2006 12:10

thanks for your support aitchtwooh, am seeing the gp this afternoon on her insistence and she will book me in for an appointment at the early pregnancy unit, presumably for a scan to confirm the foetus has died. Btw I live in Plymouth, Devon; hospital is £25m in debt ... same old story anywhere - makes me mad when I look at our national insurance contributions ... ho hum!

OP posts:

lovelymoo · 30/11/2006 12:15

I had this with both my PGs and midwife sent me straight to early pregnancy unit for a scan at the hospital. She even rung them before i arrived and i was seen as soon as i got there, i thought this was standard as many people i know that have had bleeding of pains early on have been referred straight to hosp.

Helgand · 30/11/2006 12:27

I always felt that the obstetric provision here was a little worrying. Tbh I don't really want any interventions unless there is a real medical need for it, after 2 cs in the last 3 yrs I feel like I've been at the whim of medical staff enough, however I will take the appts offered. In a strange way I was quite relieved when there was blood this morning - I had already known in my heart for some time that the pg was over so it now feels like my body is actualy doing something correct, by expelling the foetus - does that sound mad? Had a long weepy chat with dh early this morning which immediately preceeded the bleed - the chat was good timing really. I still have lots to be thankful for although I can't stop crying whenever the kids aren't looking.

OP posts:

oinker · 30/11/2006 13:31

Helgand..

I am so sorry you are going through this.

It is hard to know what is the right thing to say. If you beleive that it is a m/c then you should at the very least inform your GP, Just incase there are complications. You will need a scan to make sure everything is OK. Do you have an EPU at your hospital? Your GP can refer you.

I have had 5 and lost 6. Two were D&C's first one was a bad expereince. I think it was the shock of it all. My last one was in June..twins at 11 weeks. Nothing was happening and I was required to have a d&c. No choice as the sac kept growing. I also have fibroids they were growing too. That d&c went fine. Other m/c's were at home. The pain was quite strong and it was heartbreaking.
If I had a choice again I would opt for d&c. That's a personal choice as I would want it to be over and done with straight away. It drags on for about 4 to 5 days of heavy bleeding and clotting if it's a natural one.

Whatever you decide I am sure you will make the right decision.
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))HUGS((((((((((((((((

AitchTwoOh · 30/11/2006 13:54

it's okay to understand that you have lots to be thankful for, while nevertheless mourning your lost pregnancy and worrying about what is happening to this one, i think... don't really know what to say except that i'm sorry for your loss and your uncertainty now.

Helgand · 30/11/2006 22:33

Thanks for all your words. Going to EPU for scan tomorrow, but feeling a lot more confident that my body is looking after itself now that bleeding is picking up and aching is in correct place, although, I do feel like I have swallowed a hot air balloon which is a little strange. Dh & I have decided to go to Dartmoor on Saturday and see if there is something 'special' we can get in the visitor centre - I have a real urge to be able to hold something in the palm of my hand which will be representative of the hopes that have been dashed. Maybe some of you can relate to that. Thanks again, Hx

OP posts:

oinker · 01/12/2006 13:07

I am glad you have got an appointment.

Any kind of rememberance is special and I feel necessary. I have five little plaques with special words on them, harmony, faith, hope, love, peace all have been placed under an olive tree whcih I planted after my dads death.
It's good to have something special and a little quiet area for time alone.

))))))))))))))))))))HUGS(((((((((((((((((((((

Helgand · 01/12/2006 13:54

That's a really lovely idea, Oinker. I found the EPU appt a bit frutstrating - to be told I was having a miscarriage by a consultant seems a bit of a waste of time when I knew that 24 hours ago. Still, it's done now. I hated seeing the pictures but I am glad I did in a funny kind of way. I chose not to have a D&C - seems bizarre that they care so much about the pain that they offer surgery straight away, after so much ignoring of post cs pain by the very same people. I am looking forward to going to Dartmoor tomorrow, but dreading it at the same time. Hx

OP posts:

oinker · 02/12/2006 18:45

))))))))))))))))))))))))))HUGS(((((((((((((((((((

xmasmummy · 02/12/2006 22:42

derriford hospital is bloody awful helgand- had to have scan there when pg with ds2 now 5. it not nice hun have had 2 missed mc, although thankfully last was over 6 years ago. dunno what to do though hun i did nothing and it passed eventually, took about 4 weeks to stop completely. think i was about 7 weeks with 1st and 11 weeks with 2nd.

Helgand · 03/12/2006 23:03

Interesting comments, xmasmummy - a lot of friends who have had birth experiences at other hospitals are shocked by our local but having experienced no other I did wonder if I was just a bit cynical ... perhaps not after all.
Had the 'delivery' early Saturday morning, which after two cs was quite an important hurdle for me to jump. Also, it meant that I have the little embryo which is something not many people seem to have and (sorry if this sounds a bit yukky) we could take a photo and have a little beach cremation. Had a lovely trip to Dartmoor yesterday and today found a very crude little brown china-ish bird which I can hold in my hand as there is no baby to hold in my arms.
Thank you all for all your support. Hx

OP posts:

Flip

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.