Returning to work after a miscarriage

(8 Posts)
ais123 Thu 29-May-14 09:45:32

Hi There, I had a missed miscarriage earlier this month and had to wait almost two weeks for a D&C which I had on Monday. I've been off work since we found out about the miscarriage as I was too afraid to go back before the D&C in case the miscarriage happened naturally while I was at work. I'm due back to work on Tuesday and every time I think of going back and having to see people I start to get palpitations and cry. I'm just so anxious about how I will cope with being back at work when I'm so devastated about the loss of our baby. Does anyone have any advice on how you managed after going back to work?

springbabydays Thu 29-May-14 09:57:27

Could you see your gp before Tuesday and get some advice? Just talking to him/her might help, or you could be signed off for a bit longer, or referred for counselling if you feel that could help?

If you don't feel ready then I'm sure your colleagues would understand.

Sorry for your loss.

coffeetofunction Thu 29-May-14 09:59:40

I'm very sorry for your lose & the pain you are going through. In my experience it's really important that you don't rush yourself. Getting back to "normal" what ever that is/becomes can help but do what's right for you. I also found planning happy/exciting things helped me move forward thanksthanks xx

coffeetofunction Thu 29-May-14 10:00:21

Loss not lose sorry xx

JBrd Thu 29-May-14 10:14:52

So sorry for your loss. I agree with what the others have said - do not push yourself to go back to work if you don't feel ready, and if the thought upsets you this much. You have suffered a very real loss, and everyone is different in how they deal with the grief and how long it takes. Talk to your GP to see if they might sign you off for a little longer.

Have you actually told your work what has been happening? If you did, you will be well in your rights to say that you do not feel well enough yet to come back. My work were very understanding and let me decide when I was ready.
Take another week and see how you feel then.

When going back to work after a mc, it helped me to really get stuck in and completely focus on the task - but having said that, that really depends on how you are. Talk to your line manager about what projects might or might not be suitable, sometimes a tasks that doesn't actually require a lot of 'brainpower', but still keeps you quite busy, can be best.
Again, take it one day at a time to see how you get on. And if you feel completely overwhelmed, go home!

Treaclepie19 Sun 01-Jun-14 23:32:26

I'm due to go back Tuesday also. I second what everyone is saying and if you don't feel ready, don't go.

I am going but I don't feel good about it. I'm hoping once im there it will help. If not ill come home.

Look after yourself x

Tranquilitybaby Mon 02-Jun-14 00:22:02

If you feel panicky then you're not ready. I'd get signed off for a bit longer. Xx

mummytwobears Thu 05-Jun-14 09:03:23

I'm so sorry for your loss, it'll be hard no matter how long you wait to return and you shouldn't force yourself. But it may help a little to go back to a routine, I went back to work 8 days after my miscarriage and it was tiring and I was emotional but everyone was very sympathetic and it felt good to talk about it and acknowledge what had happened. Talk to your boss and see if you could have a phased return, so maybe half days or part time for first week or so, that way you won't exhaust yourself.
The most important thing is to allow yourself time to recover physically and emotionally, don't expect yourself to bounce back into work totally normal, it's ok to face the world and not put on a brave face.

Take care xxx

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