Unsure which option to use...

(5 Posts)
ots Wed 28-May-14 12:26:09

Had a scan today (8+3) as had some bleeding over the past few days.
Scan showed that baby stopped growing about 2 weeks ago and there was no heartbeat sad . We're so sad and shocked and just want it to be over now.
Not sure which method of management to use though. I'd prefer it to happen naturally but I know that this may take weeks. Has anyone got any opinions?

spottydolphin Wed 28-May-14 12:32:46

oh i'm so sorry to hear that ots sad

i've had a surgical termination which I chose because I just wanted it over and done with. it was "fine" (as much as that kind of thing ever can be)

basgetti Wed 28-May-14 12:38:39

So sorry for your loss. I had a MMC in December, I found out at scan at 13 weeks that the baby had stopped growing at 8 and a half weeks. I chose to manage it naturally, as I had already started bleeding so felt the process had started and I just wanted to be at home. I also didn't want a GA. It wasn't too bad, I passed the pregnancy a couple of days after the scan.

The only thing I would say is that I had some very strong painkillers left over from a previous illness that I was able to use and I don't know if I would have managed it at home without them. Also, there was an element for me of not wanting to leave the house or be too far from the bathroom in case things start happening and whilst I was lucky that things happened quite quickly, if it hadn't done I wouldn't have wanted to be waiting around for it to start for more than a few days as I would have found that quite distressing. So if you want it over with asap then maybe another management option would be better. I hope you can reach a decision that works for you and you can start to recover soon x

DontBeBlueBeARainbow Wed 28-May-14 13:26:44

Hi Ots

I'm really sorry about your baby.

I'm in the same position. I'm 8+6 but MMC happened around 5 weeks. I've been spotting for around 10 days now and had the confirmation scan on Monday.

I've decided to wait it out. I'm abroad, and the doctors offered me surgical management, saying that waiting for nature to take its course is 'risky'. I am concerned that its just standard to recommend the more expensive treatments. Also, the whole hospital system is like a cattle market. Not a single 'I'm so sorry you've lost your baby'. And being a foreigner here, privacy is even less.

So I'm hoping things do happen naturally. I suppose if they don't I will be going back in a couple of weeks, but I'd rather have the privacy at home. I'm scared though. I know I can handle things, but I'm afraid my DP will freak out at the sight of any blood, and take me off to hospital.

If I was at home and working, I think I'd rather get it over with and choose surgery.

Sorry again, take care xx

ots Wed 28-May-14 13:41:26

Thanks for everyones thoughts. I think I'm going to go with the tablet option to get it started. The thought of having surgery really frightens me.
Sorry to hear you are in the same position dontbe . Must be even harder being abroad xx

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