Due of miscarried pregnancy on my birthday

(3 Posts)
Shah15 Sun 04-May-14 08:18:25

Hi I am new to the site. Sorry to be posting this as a new thread, I didn't know where else to post it.
There are so many inspirational stories and kind words on the site, and my heart goes out to all and their little angels.
I just wanted to know how to cope because the due date of my miscarried pregnancy is in 2 weeks and it just happens to be on my birthday. I thought b'day would distract me but now I feel so sad that I'll never be happy again on the one day that I should.
I am due to start IVF any time now, but should I postpone it until next month ?

bakingtins Sun 04-May-14 08:29:45

Hi shah this happened to me too. EDD of my first MC was my birthday sad in 2009. Can't lie, it has made the day bittersweet ever since, but it is much easier after you get through the first one. At least you have an excuse to spend the day however you want to. Can you book a day off so you can do something nice but also have some space if you need to be sad? I have a little tradition that I buy a baby related charity gift (e.g. Midwifery training or newborn vaccinations) on the EDD. Makes me feel a little better that if I couldn't safely birth my baby I could help another.
If it helps, getting past the EDD has seemed to be a turning point in feeling a lot better, hope you find the same is true for you.
I don't know what I'd do about the IVF, I'd avoid if there was any chance of getting a BFN on your birthday to add to the upset, but I guess the timescale is too short for that. Would delaying starting until after your birthday give you a new focus and a fresh start?
Hope you manage to enjoy your birthday and best of luck with the IVF, hope it is successful.

uggmum Sun 04-May-14 08:32:23

I'm sorry you've experienced this. I've had 2 m/c and although the due dates were not on significant dates. I m/c on my birthday and at xmas.

I felt that the 2 dates in the year that I looked forward to were ruined.

All I can say is that time does heal (cliche I know). I always remember the m/c but I try to put it at the back of my mind and enjoy the day/days.

I am a few years down the line. But you will be happy again on this day.

I don't know about postponing your ivf as I've not been in that position. But there are lots who have and hopefully they will be along soon.

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