Missed Miscarriage Limbo

(5 Posts)
Gizmo2206 Fri 21-Mar-14 12:14:10

Hi I was overjoyed to be pregnant but spent weeks being nervous in case there was something wrong. Unfortunately we went to the scan to be told they couldn't see anything on ultrasound so did an internal scan. After what felt like forever she said she could see a baby measuring 6 weeks with no heartbeat. She said I'd have to come back in a week to confirm, but it looks pretty set in stone as I was meant to be 12 weeks. I feel so devastated and have spent the last 2 days crying. I am off work until Monday but feel like my I don't know how I will be able to move past this, everybody seems to be announcing on FB happy news of pregnancy and I just want to be doing the same not carrying a dead baby around inside of me. I feel shocked that my body would retain a miscarriage for 6 weeks with no spotting no symptoms it see ms so cruel. I am worried they will ask me how I want it removed and I just don't know anything about the 'best' option?

This is my first post on here but have read lots about other people's losses and feel so sad to see how often it happens xxxxxx

LouisaJF Fri 21-Mar-14 12:23:33

I'm so sorry, have a hug.

I had a MMC too and it was a massive shock as I didn't know it was possible. My options were to let nature take it's course eventually or to have an evacuation procedure under general anaesthetic. I opted for the procedure as I couldn't bear the thought of watching it happen naturally. It also means that although it is not a nice feeling, it is over and you have taken the first step to moving on.

It will take time to get over in more ways than one but it does get better. That was my first pregnancy, I am now sat cuddling a 2 year old DS and waiting for DS2 to arrive any day.

Go and talk to your hospital as soon as possible about your options so that you can decide what is best for you. Sitting in limbo like this will not be helping.

freelancegirl Fri 21-Mar-14 12:26:45

So sorry to hear of your loss. I've had several miscarriages but one was at 12 weeks like yours with an 8 week old foetus. I miscarried naturally and it was a very hard - physically and emotionally - experience with full on painful contractions. I have had three ERPCs and they have been much easier to deal with physically. I also have had a baby since so I hope that offers you some hope.

Gizmo2206 Fri 21-Mar-14 12:31:21

Thanks ladies, I would go and talk to hospital but because the baby was only measuring 6 weeks they said there's a minute possibility it will develop a heartbeat over the next week. But I know that's not going to happen as it means I would have had a positive test before conceiving. I was in such shock I didn't listen to much that they said. It was awful having to walk back through the waiting room where we had sat just an hour before and all the people looking at me crying.

freelancegirl Fri 21-Mar-14 12:47:53

Yes it's horrible, I have done that a few times too in terms of having to wait a week (sometimes two) for another scan and also walking back to the waiting room. There's nothing to do but wait unfortunately.

I guess I was saying what I would do once that second scan is out of the way. They will also offer you medical management where you can take drugs to bring it on but in my experience this can string it out and make it very painful too. Obviously the choice is yours but yes, it will be an upsetting week for you. It will be an upsetting time, it can take a good few weeks after a miscarriage to recover and your body to return to normal. So sorry you are going through this.

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